Advertising
Advertising

How To Forget Bad Childhood Memories And Reclaim Your Life

How To Forget Bad Childhood Memories And Reclaim Your Life

Many of us have suffered from certain childhood incidents that are haunting us, even today. Traumas come in various shapes and forms. They can be physical and psychological abuses, bullies back in school days, unhealthy family affairs, and parental divorce. These traumas have geared up the negativity in us and implicitly affected our life, lifestyle, relationships. But this is not the end of our lives. We must not let our past rule over our present as well as our future. The best way to overcome our traumas, and to get on with life is to leave all the bad childhood memories behind and start afresh. You are thinking it is easier said than done, right? Well, this article will help you (I sincerely hope it will help you) to deal with how to forget bad childhood memories and to lead a normal life.

Impacts brought by bad memories

There are many memories that cannot be shared with anyone, not even with the closest and the dearest ones. These memories are so etched into your heart that it is impossible not to think about them all the time. Some of the memories have left you feel insecure about yourself, lack of self confidence, make you distrust people easily, some may even confuse you about you and your surrounding. These are the impacts that you can not deal with and for these you need help. You have to start to believe in yourself, gain confidence, and try to remember that there are many out there who you can trust and their influence can make you be yourself again.

Advertising

Zeigarnik effect on us

Bluma Zeigarnik, a Lithuanian-born psychologist, first came up with ‘open loops’ and ‘unfinished business’ in 1927, explaining how these two terms can help us to learn from the ‘unfinished business’ or ‘open loops’. For example, you have an uncle who used to molest you when you were young. You never talked about it, not even to your parents. You wake up every morning and think about how you could have stopped your uncle, or how you could have exposed him. This is your ‘unfinished business’. There is an ‘open loop’ for you to come back to that point, and if you have time, and if he is alive, you still have the opportunity to unmask him.

We are wired in such a manner that we hardly forget our bad childhood memories. Mulling over the past can affect your mental stability, and your physical health, leaving you distraught at all times.

Advertising

How to forget bad childhood memories?

Let’s start with talking. It is always effective if you get to share your bad experiences with someone, or a group of people. It is not necessary for this “someone” to be your best friend or your sibling. You can seek professional help. A psychiatrist, or a counsellor can guide you to an enlightened path. Or, find out if there are any groups that involve individuals talking about their personal traumas. You will know you are not alone in this world, and there are many cases as worse as yours.

Try to approach life in a positive manner. Your childhood is your past. The people and the events concerned are no longer in existence. Even if they are, you are no longer a dependent individual. You are free. You have a life and you are leading your life. You are in a relationship. Contemplating on your bad memories can affect your partner and your children. Build a better and a secured future for your children.

Advertising

Talking about security, if you feel threatened by your own security, again, talk it out loud. Not everyone is the same. Being reserved or skeptical about things or people will not help you overcome your memories. I know it is extremely hard to throw away what has been bothering you, but kindly don’t allow them to shape your life. After all the things you were through, at this point in life, you deserve happiness.

Depression, anxiety, anger are all parts of growing up. You grow up every day, no matter what your age is. And each day, we encounter new experiences, some good and some bad. We make mistakes and we learn from them. We brush them aside and we move forward. How to forget bad childhood memories? Let those unacceptable recollections be the force to drive you towards your happiness, towards your success.

Advertising

Featured photo credit: Pezibear via pixabay.com

More by this author

15 Best Autobiographies Everyone Should Read At Least Once In Their Lives 20 Medical Benefits of Marijuana You Probably Never Knew Science Says People Who Talk To Themselves Are Geniuses Quotes From Socrates That Are Full Of Wisdom 10 Little Things Happy Couples Do Every Day

Trending in Communication

1 How to Live up to Your Full Potential and Succeed in Life 2 7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience 3 5 Steps to Master Networking Skills and Perfect Your Personal Branding 4 The Real Causes of Lack of Energy That Go Beyond Your Physical Health 5 If You Think You’re in an Unhappy Marriage, Remember These 5 Things

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on December 2, 2018

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

When giving a presentation or speech, you have to engage your audience effectively in order to truly get your point across. Unlike a written editorial or newsletter, your speech is fleeting; once you’ve said everything you set out to say, you don’t get a second chance to have your voice heard in that specific arena.

You need to make sure your audience hangs on to every word you say, from your introduction to your wrap-up. You can do so by:

1. Connecting them with each other

Picture your typical rock concert. What’s the first thing the singer says to the crowd after jumping out on stage? “Hello (insert city name here)!” Just acknowledging that he’s coherent enough to know where he is is enough for the audience to go wild and get into the show.

Advertising

It makes each individual feel as if they’re a part of something bigger. The same goes for any public speaking event. When an audience hears, “You’re all here because you care deeply about wildlife preservation,” it gives them a sense that they’re not just there to listen, but they’re there to connect with the like-minded people all around them.

2. Connect with their emotions

Speakers always try to get their audience emotionally involved in whatever topic they’re discussing. There are a variety of ways in which to do this, such as using statistics, stories, pictures or videos that really show the importance of the topic at hand.

For example, showing pictures of the aftermath of an accident related to drunk driving will certainly send a specific message to an audience of teenagers and young adults. While doing so might be emotionally nerve-racking to the crowd, it may be necessary to get your point across and engage them fully.

Advertising

3. Keep going back to the beginning

Revisit your theme throughout your presentation. Although you should give your audience the credit they deserve and know that they can follow along, linking back to your initial thesis can act as a subconscious reminder of why what you’re currently telling them is important.

On the other hand, if you simply mention your theme or the point of your speech at the beginning and never mention it again, it gives your audience the impression that it’s not really that important.

4. Link to your audience’s motivation

After you’ve acknowledged your audience’s common interests in being present, discuss their motivation for being there. Be specific. Using the previous example, if your audience clearly cares about wildlife preservation, discuss what can be done to help save endangered species’ from extinction.

Advertising

Don’t just give them cold, hard facts; use the facts to make a point that they can use to better themselves or the world in some way.

5. Entertain them

While not all speeches or presentations are meant to be entertaining in a comedic way, audiences will become thoroughly engaged in anecdotes that relate to the overall theme of the speech. We discussed appealing to emotions, and that’s exactly what a speaker sets out to do when he tells a story from his past or that of a well-known historical figure.

Speakers usually tell more than one story in order to show that the first one they told isn’t simply an anomaly, and that whatever outcome they’re attempting to prove will consistently reoccur, given certain circumstances.

Advertising

6. Appeal to loyalty

Just like the musician mentioning the town he’s playing in will get the audience ready to rock, speakers need to appeal to their audience’s loyalty to their country, company, product or cause. Show them how important it is that they’re present and listening to your speech by making your words hit home to each individual.

In doing so, the members of your audience will feel as if you’re speaking directly to them while you’re addressing the entire crowd.

7. Tell them the benefits of the presentation

Early on in your presentation, you should tell your audience exactly what they’ll learn, and exactly how they’ll learn it. Don’t expect them to listen if they don’t have clear-cut information to listen for. On the other hand, if they know what to listen for, they’ll be more apt to stay engaged throughout your entire presentation so they don’t miss anything.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm4.staticflickr.com

Read Next