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6 Things Happy People Never Forget

6 Things Happy People Never Forget

Does it ever seem like other people are happier than you?

You scroll on Facebook and see people having fun on their vacations, spending time with one another, or celebrating their achievements. You, on the other hand, are struggling along, just trying to make it through the day and coming home exhausted.

In an effort to console yourself, you try to rationalize why you’re in this situation and figure it must just be “bad luck”.

I know, because I’ve been there.

Over time, it can be frustrating. You could be sabotaging your own growth without realizing it. But the good news is that, if you pay attention to your thought process, you’ll realize that you can become in control of your situation.

So instead of holding yourself back, focus your energy on living positively. Happiness takes effort and a change in thinking.

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If you want to start being happy, remember to:

1. Focus on improving yourself

Don’t become fixated on other people’s successes. Never mind what that guy has or the accomplishments that girl has achieved. Just focus on your own progress and growth.

It’s easy to become envious of other people when we only see the surface. When you scroll on social media, you’ll notice that people choose to present the happiest parts of their lives, which we compare to both our difficult periods and triumphs. Instead of focusing on other people, work on yourself.

When you focus on yourself, you put in the effort to make progress each day. There’s a sense of fulfillment as you work towards something. When you devote your energy to improving yourself, other people’s achievements and goals become less relevant.

2. Know that self-worth comes from within

People will often disapprove of your choices when you decide to do something that’s unpopular. It’s up to you to decide how much you let other people’s opinions affect you.

You are in charge of how you feel about yourself. Happy people know that there’s always someone who won’t like them for whatever reason. But it doesn’t matter. What matters is this: are you doing what’s best for yourself and other people around you?

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Confidence comes from accepting yourself, regardless of what others think. Confidence comes from doing what you believe in. And if you’re confident, people will see that and have confidence in you too.

For example, when I started my site, I worried that people would criticize me or get angry at what I wrote.

But I still pushed on because I believed I could help people who refuse to stay stagnant and improve their lives. It turns out, readers enjoy what I have to say and often send me kind words of thanks! So regardless of what causes you fight for, there will always be a crowd of people supporting you.

3. Make a conscious decision to be happy

You’re probably thinking, “Choose to be happy? Doesn’t it happy naturally?”

I think happiness is largely a question of mindset. If you believe that you need that “one more thing” and then you’ll finally be happy, guess what? You will never be happy.

Happiness comes from practicing gratefulness. Things don’t always go the way you want them to, but at the same time, things that seem bad initially can end up being a blessing. Take a second and stop to appreciate what you have. There are some good things happening in your life that you might have taken for granted.

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Being happy doesn’t mean staying stagnant. It means recognizing that you’re on a journey, wherever it may lead, and that you should savor the good things (and even the hardships) along the way. Embrace the challenges you might be facing and learn from them.

4. Stop clinging to the past

Everyone has painful or embarrassing moments from the past. If you want to be happy, decide how you want to deal with painful memories.

Do you feel resentful and bitter about things? This could be crippling your ability to move forward. Or instead, do you acknowledge painful events, learn from them and then put them behind you?

Conversely, don’t let the good memories hold you back from progressing in your life. The best is yet to come. Happiness might take a different form or shape, but it’s there if you want it.

Embrace today. Now is the time to decide what you want to do and who you want to spend time with.

5. Surround yourself with people who are positive and supportive.

The people we spend time with influences who we are. Being with people who don’t support you when you try to improve yourself will bring you down if you let them.

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If you notice that the people around you are toxic to your well-being, it’s time to go. It’s easy to remain surrounded by negativity when it feels like there are no other options available.

But there is.

It’s better to be alone than with people who bring you down. Alone doesn’t mean being lonely.

Being on your own is a time for self-reflection, to find ways to improve yourself. And when you approach life positively and make the most of it, there’s a good chance you’ll attract people who feel the same way too.

6. Be truthful.

Sometimes it can be scary to tell the truth. You’re afraid of scaring other people away, or frightening yourself. On the other hand, telling the truth can be liberating.

The good thing about truthfulness is that you don’t have to remember lies, or feel bad about yourself. It means being not stressing yourself out all the time.

Most of all, stay honest to yourself. You are free to make your own choices, to live according to your own mantra, and to fight for what you believe in.

If you find yourself coasting by in life, you might also want to figure out whether you’re truly happy or just complacent with your situation.

More by this author

Melissa Chu

Founder of JumpstartYourDreamLife.com

6 Things Happy People Never Forget 5 Things You Need to Stop Doing If You Want To Be More Productive This Is How I Stop Procrastination. 7 Simple Tools to Make Your Blog Posts Even Better

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Last Updated on January 3, 2020

The 10 Essential Habits of Positive People

The 10 Essential Habits of Positive People

Are you waiting for life events to turn out the way you want so that you can feel more positive about your life? Do you find yourself having pre-conditions to your sense of well-being, thinking that certain things must happen for you to be happier? Do you think there is no way that your life stresses can make you anything other than “stressed out” and that other people just don’t understand?  If your answer is “yes” to any of these questions, you might find yourself lingering in the land of negativity for too long!

The following are some tips to keep positive no matter what comes your way. This post will help you stop looking for what psychologists call “positivity” in all the wrong places!  Here are the ten essential habits of positive people.

1. Positive people don’t confuse quitting with letting go.

Instead of hanging on to ideas, beliefs, and even people that are no longer healthy for them, they trust their judgement to let go of negative forces in their lives.  Especially in terms of relationships, they subscribe to The Relationship Prayer which goes:

 I will grant myself the ability to trust the healthy people in my life … 

To set limits with, or let go of, the negative ones … 

And to have the wisdom to know the DIFFERENCE!

 2.  Positive people don’t just have a good day – they make a good day.

Waiting, hoping and wishing seldom have a place in the vocabulary of positive individuals. Rather, they use strong words that are pro-active and not reactive. Passivity leads to a lack of involvement, while positive people get very involved in constructing their lives. They work to make changes to feel better in tough times rather than wish their feelings away.

3. For the positive person, the past stays in the past.

Good and bad memories alike stay where they belong – in the past where they happened. They don’t spend much time pining for the good ol’ days because they are too busy making new memories now. The negative pulls from the past are used not for self-flagellation or unproductive regret, but rather productive regret where they use lessons learned as stepping stones towards a better future.

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4. Show me a positive person and I can show you a grateful person.

The most positive people are the most grateful people.  They do not focus on the potholes of their lives.  They focus on the pot of gold that awaits them every day, with new smells, sights, feelings and experiences.  They see life as a treasure chest full of wonder.

5. Rather than being stuck in their limitations, positive people are energized by their possibilities.

Optimistic people focus on what they can do, not what they can’t do.  They are not fooled to think that there is a perfect solution to every problem, and are confident that there are many solutions and possibilities.  They are not afraid to attempt new solutions to old problems, rather than spin their wheels expecting things to be different this time.  They refuse to be like Charlie Brown expecting that this time Lucy will not pull the football from him!

6. Positive people do not let their fears interfere with their lives!

Positive people have observed that those who are defined and pulled back by their fears never really truly live a full life. While proceeding with appropriate caution, they do not let fear keep them from trying new things. They realize that even failures are necessary steps for a successful life. They have confidence that they can get back up when they are knocked down by life events or their own mistakes, due to a strong belief in their personal resilience.

7. Positive people smile a lot!

When you feel positive on the inside it is like you are smiling from within, and these smiles are contagious. Furthermore, the more others are with positive people, the more they tend to smile too! They see the lightness in life, and have a sense of humor even when it is about themselves. Positive people have a high degree of self-respect, but refuse to take themselves too seriously!

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8. People who are positive are great communicators.

They realize that assertive, confident communication is the only way to connect with others in everyday life.  They avoid judgmental, angry interchanges, and do not let someone else’s blow up give them a reason to react in kind. Rather, they express themselves with tact and finesse.  They also refuse to be non-assertive and let people push them around. They refuse to own problems that belong to someone else.

9. Positive people realize that if you live long enough, there are times for great pain and sadness.

One of the most common misperceptions about positive people is that to be positive, you must always be happy. This can not be further from the truth. Anyone who has any depth at all is certainly not happy all the time.  Being sad, angry, disappointed are all essential emotions in life. How else would you ever develop empathy for others if you lived a life of denial and shallow emotions? Positive people do not run from the gamut of emotions, and accept that part of the healing process is to allow themselves to experience all types of feelings, not only the happy ones. A positive person always holds the hope that there is light at the end of the darkness.  

10. Positive person are empowered people – they refuse to blame others and are not victims in life.

Positive people seek the help and support of others who are supportive and safe.They limit interactions with those who are toxic in any manner, even if it comes to legal action and physical estrangement such as in the case of abuse. They have identified their own basic human rights, and they respect themselves too much to play the part of a victim. There is no place for holding grudges with a positive mindset. Forgiveness helps positive people become better, not bitter.

How about you?  How many habits of positive people do you personally find in yourself?  If you lack even a few of these 10 essential habits, you might find that the expected treasure at the end of the rainbow was not all that it was cracked up to be. How could it — if you keep on bringing a negative attitude around?

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I wish you well in keeping positive, because as we all know, there is certainly nothing positive about being negative!

Featured photo credit: Janaína Castelo Branco via flickr.com

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