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How to Transform Your Life by Creating High Self Esteem

How to Transform Your Life by Creating High Self Esteem

Self esteem is the foundation from which a life can be fully lived. Belief in yourself is paramount when it comes to realizing your goals and making the profound difference you came into this life to make. Self truth is the core foundation of self esteem.

If you are complaining about your life, immediately stop. Complaints will get you nowhere. In one moment, you can make the decision to create the life you really want to live. All it takes is a decision, backed by inspired action and the commitment to follow through. Remember that in the seeds of our deepest despair lies the keys to creating the transformation we want to see. Use your adverse circumstances as a springboard from which you summon the determination to turn it all around completely. No one else can do this for you. This is why you are in this life—to grow, evolve, transform, and make a difference. Start with making that difference for yourself. Then, you will feel inspired to help others who are in the shoes you were once in. Start by making that decision now.

If you wish to better your life, then you must release all belief that by doing so you will be a better person. The key is in knowing that you are a supreme being just as you are and that “bettering your life” is just a means of self-expression. It is your divine expression to live according to your grandest preferences—not because it will make you better, but because you are serving as a result of discovering and expressing the best you have within you.

You are here to experience yourself, not “fix” yourself. You are not broken and you do not need to be fixed! Whoever put you down during your life lied to you.

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Your outer achievements or failures never constitute your real worth as a human being. All you are comes from your heart. All you will ever be you were already born to be. It’s all inside of you, now. Take a good look into your heart and when you find the goodness that’s already there, you will know that all you need to do to feel better is to bring it out.

The people who laugh at you, the ones who ridicule you, are the precise people who do not have the courage to live up to their highest potential. View them with loving compassion while you simultaneously stop telling them your business. If there is someone in your life who is not fully supportive of you, you certainly do not need that person in your life. Start being your own greatest support system by removing yourself from unsupportive people.

Build your self worth

Here are a few guidelines you can take from within to build your self worth, esteem, and help you bring out all your desire to be and express in your life. They are phrased in the first person to help you integrate them until you are living your truth on all levels, in all areas of your life, and genuinely feeling pure love and acceptance for yourself.

  • I remember that whether or not someone is in my life is never a reflection of me; it is merely a reflection of their preference, and I honor their preference without taking it personally and allowing it to hurt me.
  • I remember that whether I believe I can or I believe I can’t, I’m right!
  • I know that what I create in my life is an expression of what fills my heart with joy. It is never a validation of who I am, it is pure expression.
  • I know that outward status does not constitute a person’s worth. All people are equally worthy during pleasant times and unpleasant times.
  • I realize that my greatest challenges have been my greatest teachers. I have learned much from the difficulties I have been through, and I help others, even if only by sharing.
  • I create every circumstance in my life, and I do so in cooperation with others, all with pure motives.

Manifest the life you came here to live

Use the following guidelines to manifest the life you came here to live, beginning with how you view yourself.

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1. Decide. Decide how you want to feel, how you prefer to live, and how you prefer to create your life.

2. Commit. You must commit fully to the process.

3. Be Willing. You need to be willing to do whatever it takes with honesty, dignity, integrity, and pure motives.

4. Let Go. This means to let go of the expectations of others, along with doubts and all negative self-talk so your passion backs your every move.

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5. Follow. Follow your truth every moment, and follow through in your actions with everything that represents your highest and deepest truth.

6. Wait. Have patience with an ever-unfolding process and remember to enjoy the process rather than just live for an outcome.

7. Experience. This is the last step when you actually live out and experience all you first decided upon. Remember to live completely in the now, enjoying this journey called your life.

Your creative expression is too important to stifle out of fear of what others think. Bring your creative expression out from your heart because you care that it makes a difference to your joy during the process.

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Remember to listen to your body and rest when you feel tired. You can also go out for a walk in nature if you are able. Rest is so important, plus you’ll look a lot better when you’re energized and refreshed rather than run down.

While you are transforming your life, take it moment by moment so you are not just living for one goal, because that moment will come and go. Passion for all you are doing must fuel your purpose.

It’s super helpful to ask for support, such as a few tips and pointers from people who are where you would like to see yourself. While you are doing this, remember that people like when you show an interest in them. Let the person know that you would be happy to spread the word for them if they are doing something and would like to get the word out.

Being real, humble, and down to earth is a quality I’m sure you like to see in others. So remain humble, even when you do achieve success. Everyone goes through highs and lows in their life. Come from a place of, “I’ve been there and want to make a difference.” That will speak volumes to everyone. Think of the impact Princess Diana still has on the world. Her humble attitude was never cocky or status seeking. It was her heart that won the world over. There’s an old saying, “The people you meet on your way up are the same people you will meet on your way down.” This is not meant to scare or deter you, it’s just how life is—up and down, and back up again.

Whatever you are doing, never believe you have to win the approval of everyone. You do not have to explain your personal views or spiritual preferences to people who cannot relate. Simply share with people who can be supportive. If you feel negative energy from someone, move in the opposite direction. Block them on social media. Work in heart-centered cooperation with others for a win-win for all. This is so much more beneficial than so-called competition. Just do your best, and be your best, from the inside out.

A few extra pointers to help you during this process

  • Select your friends very carefully based on the goodness in their hearts, and for no other reason.
  • Admit your true feelings to yourself rather than fighting them and trying to make them go away. They are trying to tell you something you need to acknowledge and know.
  • Trust that any delay is a gift in disguise.
  • Set priorities for your daily activities according to what you feel most inspired to do.
  • Clear out any part of your life that you no longer feel excited about.
  • Remember that know you are the creator today of what your life will look like tomorrow.
  • Stay away from drama, gossip, negative people, and negative situations. Surround yourself only with people and situations that are positive, inspiring, supportive and life-giving.

Remember that no matter how successful a person may be, the truest form of success is a loving and pure heart. That is what makes the most difference. It is also priceless and eternal. Do it all with joy and you will become a true inspiration for many others.

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How to Transform Your Life by Creating High Self Esteem Does He (Or She) Deserve YOU?

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1 19 Golden Pieces of Relationship Advice From the Experts 2 Signs Of Low Self-Esteem And The Root Causes You Might Not Know 3 How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship 4 How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying About the Past or Future 5 This Is What Happens When You Move Out Of the Comfort Zone

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

Reference

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