Advertising
Advertising

8 Interesting Reasons to Date Someone from Another Country

8 Interesting Reasons to Date Someone from Another Country

When you date someone from another country, it can be exciting, confusing, educational and adventurous. I consider it a relationship with many added bonuses. Whether your partner speaks the same language or grew up on the same continent as you doesn’t change some of the significant patterns you’ll experience. There are some really wonderful things about dating someone from another country along with obstacles. The horizon goes further in a cross cultural relationship.

1. Romantic Experience

You know that your feelings are true when you date someone from another country. You are both taking risks one way or another to be with each other. Maybe there’s people that don’t understand, family members that miss you while you’re away or issues with visas. When you fall in love with someone from another country, there are lengths you have to take to stay together. You take on different views of a relationship as you not only work on your feelings together but also legalities of being together.

Bringing someone home to your country is a big responsibility with an even larger romantic gesture attached to it. You have to either dedicate yourself to the person or say goodbye and potentially never see them again. In most relationship, love is tested by the normal day-to-day problems. A relationship with someone from a different country can mean separation beyond your control at times. Later on, there may be big choices to make in order to be together. Spousal sponsorship or marriage show each other that you’re dedicated.

2. You Learn A Lot About Yourself

As a native English speaker, I didn’t think my language would pose a problem anywhere in the world. Actually, if I’m honest, I didn’t think too much about the world outside of the town I grew up in. Although I traveled abroad, until I dated someone from another country, I wasn’t truly tested until I fell in love with someone who’s native tongue was not the same as mine. Going to his country helped me develop a lot as a person as I became involved in his community.

Advertising

Going to another country to stay or live for a long period of time will change you in positive ways. You become educated about the world and how you fit it in as you immerse yourself in a brand new culture. You become more courageous as you head to the grocery store and attempt navigating through aisles of foreign foods.

3. Teaching of Cultures and Language

You will likely have too much to talk about to ever get bored with one another. When you date someone from another country, you and your partner have plenty to discuss about your language or culture. Customs you experienced as a child are likely much different than their own. You can impress even the biggest food connoisseur by barbecuing gourmet burgers on an open fire. Carving a pumpkin with your partner who comes from a country that doesn’t celebrate Halloween brings a funner element to an old pass time.

Someone from Europe will likely get educated for one career and stick to it while a North American will have many jobs and careers over their life. This can make your European partner consider what other career goals they might like to pursue in life or they can teach you to be more settled. As you talk to one another about the views you have based on your culture, you both learn a lot.

4. Learning of Cultures and Language

When your partner teaches you about their culture, you learn a lot about them. It’s been a mystery in the past on how to get inside the mind of your significant other. They will unknowingly unlock the secrets to who they are and why when they explain their upbringing and childhood.

Advertising

You learn how not to insult them or their cultural beliefs as they open up to religious and political views. You also learn what your partner’s values are. They may come from a culture where eating horse meat, lung and heart is really normal. It may never be something you’ll indulge in but you will learn why they eat it and respect their reasons.

5. Acceptance of Your Differences

Relationships are hard enough with misunderstandings and difference of opinions. Imagine dating someone from another country who was brought up by parents that had to go through a war. My experience is that in Germany, I have had to find a strength in me I didn’t know I had. The German culture is tough and they work hard.

Where I come from, people are really nice but it’s often not legitimate. We ask strangers how they’re doing, but we don’t really care. Here in Germany, when you ask someone how they’re doing, they’ll tell you straight up for most of the morning. You don’t ask what you don’t want to know. There’s a certain honesty here. If someone is nice to you, they really like you.

6. Exotic Experience

Falling in love is an adventure on it’s own but falling when you date someone from another country and fall in love, it increases the love buzz exponentially. Being told “I love you” in another language will give you the shivers. The way your partner expresses love and shows it is likely different than anything you’ve experienced. It can be like falling in love for the first time as everything is new.

Advertising

Love is about discovering each other and it’s much more interesting to discover someone that is different from you on many levels.

7. Even Fights are a Learning Experience

When you’re arguing with your partner, you have to consider what you’re saying before you say it in the event their language is different than yours. Often, even if you have a heated argument, it gets interrupted because someone has said a word or phrase that the other doesn’t understand.

You tend to be more conscious about what you say when you have a disagreement. It can take some time to reach deep understanding, but you’ll constantly learn lessons.

8. Tourist in Both Countries

If you’re visiting your partner’s home country, they’ll show you interesting attractions. You get an insider tour of real living in their country that you probably wouldn’t get as a general tourist. You’ll be introduced to festivals, traditions and a totally new cuisine.

Advertising

In return, when your partner comes to your country you can play tour guide. You’ll probably take them to places you’ve never been yourself. This is a great way to share experiences and take adventures as you show each other your back yards.

Featured photo credit: Love Lock ~ Paris, France/ Dustin Gaffke via flickr.com

More by this author

Loraine Couturier

Content creation and marketing

How To Mend A Broken Heart After A Heart-breaking Goodbye Insecurities Are Hidden Wounds That Take Time to Heal in Any Relationships 7 Things “I Love You” Doesn’t Mean 7 Ways to Thrive Now By Fixing Mistakes From The Past 5 Non-Surgical Ways to Look Younger at 40

Trending in Lifestyle

1 How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries 2 18 Benefits of Journaling That Will Change Your Life 3 10 Easy At-Home Leg Toning Workouts for Women 4 10 Best Wireless Headphones For Running 5 9 Best Blood Pressure Monitors You Can Use at Home

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

We all have them—those hurtful, frustrating, offensive, manipulative people in our lives. No matter how hard we try to surround ourselves with positive and kind people, there will always be those who will disrespect, insult, berate, and misuse you if we allow them to.

We may, for a variety of reasons, not be able to avoid them, but we can determine how we interact with them and how we allow them to interact with us.

So, how to take control of your life and stop being pushed around?

Learning to set clear firm boundaries with the people in our lives at work and in our personal lives is the best way to protect ourselves from the negative effects of this kind of behavior.

What Boundaries Are (And What They’re Not)

Boundaries are limits

—they are not threats or ultimatums. Boundaries inform or teach. They are not a form of punishment.

Boundaries are firm lines—determined by you—which cannot be crossed by those around you. They are guidelines for how you will allow others to treat you and what kind of behaviors you will expect.

Advertising

Healthy personal boundaries help protect you from physical or emotional pain. You may also need to set firm boundaries at work to ensure you and your time are not disrespected. Don’t allow others to take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

Clear boundaries communicate to others that you demand respect and consideration—that you are willing to stand up for yourself and that you will not be a doormat for anyone. They are a “no trespassing” sign that makes it very clear when a line has been crossed and that there will be consequences for doing so.

Boundaries are not set with the intention of changing other people. They may change how people interact with you, but they are more about enforcing your needs than attempting to change the general behavior and attitude of others.

How to Establish Boundaries and Take Control of Your Life

Here are some ways that you can establish boundaries and take control of your life.

1. Self-Awareness Comes First

Before you can establish boundaries with others, you first need to understand what your needs are.

You are entitled to respect. You have the right to protect yourself from inappropriate or offensive behavior. Setting boundaries is a way of honoring your needs.

To set appropriate boundaries, you need to be clear about what healthy behaviors look like—what healthy relationships look like.

Advertising

You first have to become more aware of your feelings and honest with yourself about your expectations and what you feel is appropriate behavior:

  • Where do you need to establish better boundaries?
  • When do you feel disrespected?
  • When do you feel violated, frustrated, or angered by the behavior of others?
  • In what situations do you feel you are being mistreated or taken advantage of?
  • When do you want to be alone?
  • How much space do you need?

You need to honor your own needs and boundaries before you can expect others to honor them. This allows you to take control of your life.

2. Clear Communication Is Essential

Inform others clearly and directly what your expectations are. It is essential to have clear communication if you want others to respect your boundaries. Explain in an honest and respectful tone what you find offensive or unacceptable.

Many people simply aren’t aware that they are behaving inappropriately. They may never have been taught proper manners or consideration for others.

3. Be Specific but Don’t Blame

Taking a blaming or punishing attitude automatically puts people on the defensive. People will not listen when they feel attacked. It’s part of human nature.

That said, you do not need to overexplain or defend yourself. Boundaries are not open to compromise.

Sample language:

Advertising

  • “You may not…yell or raise your voice to me…”
  • “I need…to be treated with respect…”
  • “It’s not okay when…you take things from my desk without asking…”
  • “I won’t…do your work…cover for you anymore…”
  • “It’s not acceptable when…you ridicule or insult me…”
  • “I am uncomfortable when…you use offensive language”
  • “I will no longer be able to…lend you money…”

Being able to communicate these without sounding accusatory is essential if you want others to respect your boundaries so you can take control of your life.

4. Consequences Are Often Necessary

Determine what the appropriate consequences will be when boundaries are crossed. If it’s appropriate, be clear about those consequences upfront when communicating those boundaries to others.

Follow through. People won’t respect your boundaries if you don’t enforce them.

Standing our ground and forcing consequences doesn’t come easily to us. We want to be nice. We want people to like us, but we shouldn’t have to trade our self-respect to gain friends or to achieve success.

We may be tempted to let minor disrespect slide to avoid conflict, but as the familiar saying goes, “if you give people an inch, they’ll take a mile.”

It’s much easier to address offensive or inappropriate behavior now than to wait until that behavior has gotten completely out of hand.

It’s also important to remember that positive reinforcement is even more powerful than negative consequences. When people do alter the way they treat you, acknowledge it. Let people know that you notice and appreciate their efforts.

Advertising

Final Thoughts

Respect is always a valid reason for setting a boundary. Don’t defend yourself or your needs. Boundaries are often necessary to protect your time, your space, and your feelings. And these are essential if you want to take control of your life.

Start with the easiest boundaries first. Setting boundaries is a skill that needs to be practiced. Enlist support from others if necessary. Inform people immediately when they have crossed the line.

Don’t wait. Communicate politely and directly. Be clear about the consequences and follow them through.

The better you become at setting your own boundaries, the better you become at recognizing and respecting the boundaries of others.

Remember that establishing boundaries is your right. You are entitled to respect. You can’t control how other people behave, but you do have control over the way you allow people to treat you.

Learning to set boundaries is not always easy, but with time, it will become more comfortable. You may eventually find that boundaries become automatic and you no longer need to consciously set them.

They will simply become a natural extension of your self-respect.

Featured photo credit: Thomas Kelley via unsplash.com

Read Next