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Want to Lift Yourself Up? Instant Mood Boosters

Want to Lift Yourself Up? Instant Mood Boosters

What if I told you that you could instantly change your life and the lives of those around you by simply paying attention to the universe and embracing opportunities to spread good energy? Don’t believe me? I challenge you to give it a try!

Acts of kindness and spreading good energy will absolutely bring you immense joy and happiness and will lift your spirits and change your mood instantly. An act of kindness given freely with absolutely no expectation for anything in return can truly change another person’s day as well as your own. Here are 10 simple ways that you can spread good energy and lift your mood instantly. In helping someone, you will experience mood boosters for yourself.

1. Pay attention

The universe is constantly presenting us with opportunities to be kind. Are you paying attention to these mood boosters? From assisting someone with carrying groceries, to standing back and opening doors, to allowing someone to go before you in a queue, there are events occurring around you and in front of you that will offer you the opportunity to lift yourself up as well as someone else. In today’s busy world, practicing courtesy has gone by the wayside. Start paying attention to who is around you. Expand your energy out and shower kindness to the people you encounter over the course of your day. A single act of kindness sends out a blast of positive energy that spreads further than you could ever imagine.

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2. Pay it forward

Practice random acts of kindness as often as you can.

For example –
Pay for a stranger’s coffee if you have spare change.
Cook a meal for someone who is struggling and needs a hand.
Send someone a beautiful hand written letter – YES handwritten! The art of hand writing a beautiful letter has been replaced with emailing and texting so take the time to create a personal letter to let someone know how important they are to you.
Wash someone’s car.
Clean someone’s house.
Tidy up someone’s garden.
Buy someone flowers.

I could keep going with this list as there are just so many ways to pay it forward. Giving your time, your energy or a small gift can lift someone’s spirits and warm someone’s heart as well as your own.

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3. Be compassionate

Practice compassion with everyone. When someone is struggling, if you really listen to them and offer words of support and encouragement, you will naturally shine light in what is often a dark place. Having a positive, compassionate, and forgiving outlook will recharge your soul and provide you with mood boosters.

4. Reconnect

Take the time to really connect with your community. When you step outside and start engaging with the people around you, sharing their stories and embracing what they are contributing to the world, you will create all sorts of positive emotions. Take the time as well to reconnect with old friends who you have lost touch with and make sure you check up on people who may be experiencing hard times. I can assure you, the energy exchanged between you and someone else when you reconnect is powerful.

5. Volunteer

Volunteering is an investment into your community as well as the people who live in it. Investing pretty much always offers a return right? So imagine the return you will get when you volunteer your time and energy and focus on having a positive impact on someone else’s life instead of your own.

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6. Listen

Make someone else feel valued by listening. When you next meet with someone, turn off your mobile phone and put it away. Give them your undivided attention. Be mindful, present, and engaged and really take in the whole conversation without the distractions.

7. Create your own movement

Inspire people around you to follow your lead. Maybe there is an opportunity for you to create a community event or activity that could change lives for the better. Recruit like-minded people and find a way to share some positive action in your community. Nothing is more uplifting than throwing yourself into a project that is based on giving from the heart.

8. Give genuine compliments and smile

Take the time to give a genuine compliment to someone in your circle. Expressing a real, heartfelt compliment to someone connects and creates a bond of pure uplifting energy between you and the recipient. And while you are at it, smile more. Smiling instantly changes your mood. It is like flicking the on switch to feeling happy. Smiling has all sorts of positive effects on your body and when you smile at another person, that feel good energy is nothing short of contagious.

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9. Shine your light

Spread good energy and don’t be afraid to really be yourself. Have you ever met someone who “lights up a room”? They energize everyone around them with their positive attitude. You can choose to uplift and inspire people and in return you will be rewarded with even more positive energy and fuel for your soul.  Remember, you do not need anyone’s approval to be yourself. Now more than ever we need more unique, authentic, people willing to shine their light on the world.

10. Repeat the above list daily

Keep your eyes and your heart open and embrace the opportunity to uplift someone else.

We can all make a difference and share more joy and more positive energy with the world. For every act of kindness you do, you give out an abundance of warm, uplifting energy to the universe. There is no act too small or too big. Even the simplest of gestures can affect many lives for the better. The healing powers of kindness are plentiful and I implore you to open up your heart and give generously to be kind and courteous. It will lift your spirits, change your life, and the lives of so many around you.

Featured photo credit: Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

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Jo Ettles

Jo Ettles is a published self help author, international writer, speaker and extremely gifted intuitive life coach.

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Last Updated on March 30, 2020

What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

Have you ever walked into a room and felt like your nerves simply couldn’t handle it? Your heart beats fast, you start to sweat, and you feel like all eyes are on you (even if they’re really not). This is just one of the many ways that being self-conscious can rear its ugly head.

You may not even realize you’re self-conscious, and you may be wondering, “What does self-conscious mean?” That’s a good place to start.

This article will define self-consciousness, show how practically everyone has faced it at one point or another, and give you tips to avoid it.

What Does Self-Conscious Mean?

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, self-conscious is defined as “conscious of one’s own acts or states as belonging to or originating in oneself.”[1]

Not so bad, right? There’s another definition, though — one that speaks more to what you’re going through: “feeling uncomfortably conscious of oneself as an object of the observation of others.” For those of us who regularly deal with extreme self-consciousness, that second definition sounds about right.

There are many different ways self-consciousness can spring up. You may feel self-conscious around people you know, like your family members or closest friends. You may feel self-conscious at work, even though you spend hours every week around your co-workers. Or you may feel self-conscious when out in public and surrounded by strangers. However, you probably don’t feel self-conscious when you’re home alone.

How to Stop Being Too Self-Conscious

When you’re in the throes of self-consciousness, it’s nearly impossible to remember how to stop feeling that way. That’s why it’s so important to prepare ahead of time, when you’re feeling ready to tackle the problem instead of succumbing to it.

Here are a variety of ways to feel better about yourself and stop thinking about how others see you.

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1. Ask Yourself, “So What?”

One way to banish negative, self-conscious thoughts is to do just that: banish them.

The next time you walk into a room and feel your face getting red, think to yourself, “So what?” How much does it really matter if people don’t like how you look or act? What’s the worst that could happen?

Most of the time, you’ll find that you don’t have a good answer to this question. Then, you can immediately start assigning such thoughts less importance. With self-awareness, you can acknowledge that your negative thoughts are present and realize that you don’t agree with them.[2] They’re just thoughts, after all.

2. Be Honest

A lie that self-consciousness might tell is that there’s one way to act or feel. Honestly, though, everyone else is just figuring life out as well. There isn’t a preferred way to show up to an event, gathering, or public place. What you can do is be honest with your feelings and thoughts.[3]

If you feel offended by something someone says, you don’t have to smile to be polite or laugh to fit in with the crowd. Instead, you can politely say why you disagree or excuse yourself and find a group of people who you relate to better. If you’re nervous, don’t overcompensate by trying to look relaxed and casual — it’ll be obvious you’re putting on a front. Instead, nothing is more endearing than saying, “I’m a little nervous!” to a room of people who probably feel the exact same way.

On the same note, if you don’t understand why someone wants you to do something, question it. You can do this at work, at home, or even with people you don’t know well. Nobody should force you to do something you don’t want to do.

Also, even if you’re willing to do what’s asked of you, there’s nothing wrong with asking for more clarification. People will realize that you’re not a person to be bossed around.

3. Understand Why You’re Struggling at Work

Being self-conscious at work can get in the way of your daily responsibilities, your relationships with co-workers, and even your career as a whole. If you’re facing some sort of conflict but you’re too nervous to speak up, you may be at the whim of what happens to you instead of taking some control.

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If you’re usually confident at work, you may be wondering where this new self-consciousness is coming from. It’s possible that you’re dealing with burnout.[4] Common signs are anxiety, fatigue and distraction, all of which can leave you feeling under-confident.

4. Succeed at Something

When you create success in your life, it’s easier to feel confident[5] and less self-conscious. If you feel self-conscious at work, finish the project that’s been looming over your head. If you feel self-conscious in the gym, complete an advanced workout class.

Exposing yourself to what you’re scared of and then succeeding at it in some way (even just by finishing it) can do wonders for your self-esteem. The more confidence you build, the more likely you are to have more success in the future, which will create a cycle of confidence-building.

5. Treat All of You — Not Just Your Self-Consciousness

Trying to solve your self-consciousness alone may not treat the root of the problem. Instead, take a well-rounded approach to lower your self-consciousness and build confidence in areas where you may struggle.

Even professional counselors are embracing this holistic type of treatment[6] because they feel that the health of the mind and body are inextricably linked. This approach combines physical, spiritual, and psychological components. Common activities and treatments include meditation, yoga, massage, and healthy changes to diet and exercise.

If much of this is new to you, it will pay to give it a try. You never know how it will impact you.

If you’re feeling self-conscious about how your body looks, a massage that makes you feel great could boost your confidence. If you try a new workout, you could have something exciting to talk about the next time you’re in a group setting.

Putting yourself in a new situation and learning that you can get through it with grace can give you the confidence to get through all sorts of events and nerve-wracking moments.

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6. Make the Changes That Are Within Your Control

Let’s say you walk into a room and you’re self-conscious about how you look. However, you may have put a lot of time and effort into your outfit. Even though it may stand out, this is how you have chosen to express yourself.

You have to work on your internal confidence, not your external appearance. There’s nothing to change other than your outlook.

On the other hand, maybe there’s something that you don’t like about yourself that you can change. For example, maybe you hate how a birthmark on your face looks or have varicose veins that you think are unsightly. If you can do something about these things, do it! There’s nothing wrong with changing your appearance (or skills, education, etc.) if it’s going to make you more confident.

You don’t have to accept your current situation for acceptance’s sake. There’s no award for putting up with something you hate. Confidence is also required to make changes that are scary, even if they’re for the better. Plus, it may be an easier fix than you thought. For example, treating varicose veins doesn’t have to involve surgery — sometimes simple compression stockings will take care of the problem.[7]

7. Realize That Everyone Has Awkward Moments

Everyone has said something awkward to someone else and lived to tell the tale. We’ve all forgotten somebody’s name or said, “You too!” when the concession stand girl says to enjoy our movie. Not only are these things uber-common, but they’re not nearly as embarrassing as you feel they are.

Think about how you react when someone else does something awkward. Do you think, “Wow, that person’s such a loser!” or do you think, “What a relief, I’m not the only one who does that.” Chances are good that’s the same reaction others have to you when you stumble.

Remember, self-consciousness is a state of mind that you have control over. You don’t have to feel this way. Do what you need to in order to build your confidence, put your self-consciousness in perspective, and start exercising your “I feel awesome about myself” muscle. It’ll get easier with time.

When Is Being Self-Conscious a Good Thing?

Self-consciousness can sometimes be a good thing[8], but you have to take the awkwardness and nerves out of it.

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In this case, “self-aware” is a much better term. Knowing how you come off to people is an excellent trait; you’ll be able to read a room and understand how what you do and say affects others. These are fantastic skills for people work and personal relationships.

Self-awareness helps you dress appropriately for the occasion, tells you that you’re talking too loud or not loud enough, and guides a conversation so you don’t offend or bore anyone.

It’s not about being someone you’re not — that can actually have adverse effects, just like self-consciousness. Instead, it’s about turning up certain aspects of yourself to perform well in the situation.

Final Thoughts

When you’re self-conscious, you’re constantly battling with yourself in an effort to control how other people view you. You try to change yourself to suit what you think other people want to see.

The truth, though, is that you can’t actually control how other people view you — and you may not even be correct about how they view you in the first place.

Being confident doesn’t happen overnight. Instead, it happens in small steps as you slowly build your confidence and say “no” to your self-consciousness. It also requires accepting that you’re going to feel self-conscious sometimes, and that’s okay.

Sometimes worrying that there is a problem can be more stressful than the problem itself. Feeling bad for feeling self-conscious can be more troublesome than simply feeling it and getting on with the day.

Forgive yourself for being human and make the small changes that will lead to better confidence in the future.

More Tips for Improving Your Self-Esteem

Featured photo credit: Cata via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Merriam-Webster: Self-conscious
[2] Bustle: 7 Tips On How To Stop Feeling Self-Conscious
[3] Marc and Angel: 10 Things to Remember When You Feel Unsure of Yourself
[4] Bostitch: How to Protect Small Businesses From Burnout
[5] Psychology Today: Self-conscious? Get Over It
[6] Wake Forest University: Embracing Holistic Medicine
[7] Center for Vein Restoration: What Causes Venous Ulcers, and How Are They Treated?
[8] Scientific American: The Pros and Cons of Being Self-Aware

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