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17 Mindset Twists To Have This Year (That Can Make You Much Happier)

17 Mindset Twists To Have This Year (That Can Make You Much Happier)

Happiness is a journey and getting those things you want is dependent on the mindset you have to obtaining them. A great year it should be for you, but are you willing to take a chance on improving your mindset and be happier? Here are 17 mindset twists that will certainly make you happier before the end of the year.

1. Become more productive

Focus on productivity. Think of doing more in less time and performing less action. There are productivity tools and hacks that can help you achieve this.

2. Don’t procrastinate, act!

Don’t procrastinate. Do what is necessary to make what you want happen. The best time to start is now. Instead of making excuses and complaining, act!

3. Spending too much time on social media

Social media can be a burner. Yes you want to listen to the gossips and know what is happening with your friends. But if you want to be happier learn to say no to social media. It will save you any bruise on your self-esteem and keep you interacting with the real world instead.

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4. Taking yourself too seriously

Yes you will make mistakes. You cannot be perfect and don’t expect this, but always focus on what you can learn from your past errors.

5. Talk positive to yourself

Expect the best and never the worst. You should know that such will only give you the confidence you need to actualize those things you desire.

6. Learn to say no

A lot of things will catch your eye and want to take your energy. But your mindset should be focused on getting more out of less rather than less out of more. So say no to the things that are exhaustive and do not steer you towards your major goals.

7. Be consistent

There is no point in dilly-dallying. Follow any course of action to the end. Be consistent and solid.

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8. Choose growth

Don’t feel weighed down by criticisms or let downs. Think of how you will grow from a setback or a failure rather than allowing it to pull you down.

9. Take charge

Be responsible for those things you can control. And your life or the direction you to take with it is your number one responsibility.

10. Prioritize

Do the things that matter. Being organized adds to your self-esteem and helps you stay productive.

11. Appreciate yourself

Learn to know your strengths and weaknesses. Know what you can take, your limitations and how far you can go.

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12. Be realistic

There is nothing wrong with aiming high. Yet make sure you can achieve whatever you set out to do. Better to reach a goal than live one of mere wishes.

13. Visualize

Think of where you are going to and visualize success at it. Imagine or see yourself reaching these goals you have set out to accomplish.

14. Be tolerant

Any feedback should be listened to or taken in constructively. Do not throw away what may lead to personal improvement.

15. Seek support

Seek support from friends, family and colleagues. You cannot enjoy or be happy alone, you need constant connections to attain happiness.

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16. Be result focused

Think of how to make the best out of a challenging situation. Don’t think or dwell on problems, rather dwell on solutions and how to get out of a tight corner. Navigate possibilities, strategize and apply new techniques.

17. Disengage

Disengage, take breaks, and find time to enjoy moments with your friends, family and yourself. You can only be happier when you disconnect from the drama of work and technology every now and then. This gives you time to focus and perceive what is around you. Besides you are able to offer yourself the clarity you deserve in the process.

Featured photo credit: http://www.compfight.com via compfight.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on February 21, 2019

The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach

The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach

In business, in social relationships, in family… In whatever context conflict is always inevitable, especially when you are in the leader role. This role equals “make decisions for the best of majority” and the remaining are not amused. Conflicts arise.

Conflicts arise when we want to push for a better quality work but some members want to take a break from work.

Conflicts arise when we as citizens want more recreational facilities but the Government has to balance the needs to maintain tourism growth.

Conflicts are literally everywhere.

Avoiding Conflicts a No-No and Resolving Conflicts a Win-Win

Avoiding conflicts seem to be a viable option for us. The cruel fact is, it isn’t. Conflicts won’t walk away by themselves. They will, instead, escalate and haunt you back even more when we finally realize that’s no way we can let it be.

Moreover, avoiding conflicts will eventually intensify the misunderstanding among the involved parties. And the misunderstanding severely hinders open communication which later on the parties tend to keep things secret. This is obviously detrimental to teamwork.

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Some may view conflicts as the last step before arguments. And they thus leave it aside as if they never happen. This is not true.

Conflicts are the intersect point between different individuals with different opinions. And this does not necessarily lead to argument.

Instead, proper handling of conflicts can actually result in a win-win situation – both parties are pleased and allies are gained. A better understanding between each other and future conflicts are less likely to happen.

The IBR Approach to Resolve Conflicts

Here, we introduce to you an effective approach to resolve conflicts – the Interest-Based Relational (IBR) approach. The IBR approach was developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury in their 1981 book Getting to Yes. It stresses the importance of the separation between people and their emotions from the problem. Another focus of the approach is to build mutual understanding and respect as they strengthen bonds among parties and can ultimately help resolve conflicts in a harmonious way. The approach suggests a 6-step procedure for conflict resolution:

Step 1: Prioritize Good Relationships

How? Before addressing the problem or even starting the discussion, make it clear the conflict can result in a mutual trouble and through subsequent respectful negotiation the conflict can be resolved peacefully. And that brings the best outcome to the whole team by working together.

Why? It is easy to overlook own cause of the conflict and point the finger to the members with different opinions. With such a mindset, it is likely to blame rather than to listen to the others and fail to acknowledge the problem completely. Such a discussion manner will undermine the good relationships among the members and aggravate the problem.

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Example: Before discussion, stress that the problem is never one’s complete fault. Everyone is responsible for it. Then, it is important to point out our own involvement in the problem and state clearly we are here to listen to everyone’s opinions rather than accusing others.

Step 2: People Are NOT the Cause of Problem

How? State clearly the problem is never one-sided. Collaborative effort is needed. More importantly, note the problem should not be taken personally. We are not making accusations on persons but addressing the problem itself.

Why? Once things taken personally, everything will go out of control. People will become irrational and neglect others’ opinions. We are then unable to address the problem properly because we cannot grasp a fuller and clearer picture of the problem due to presumption.

Example: In spite of the confronting opinions, we have to emphasize that the problem is not a result of the persons but probably the different perspectives to view it. So, if we try to look at the problem from the other’s perspective, we may understand why there are varied opinions.

Step 3: Listen From ALL Stances

How? Do NOT blame others. It is of utmost importance. Ask for everyone’s opinions. It is important to let everyone feel that they contribute to the discussion. Tell them their involvement is essential to solve the problem and their effort is very much appreciated.

Why? None wants to be ignored. If one feels neglected, it is very likely for he/she to be aggressive. It is definitely not what we hope to see in a discussion. Acknowledging and being acknowledged are equally important. So, make sure everyone has equal opportunity to express their views. Also, realizing their opinions are not neglected, they will be more receptive to other opinions.

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Example: A little trick can played here: Invite others to talk first. It is an easy way to let others feel involved and ,more importantly, know their voices are heard. Also, we can show that we are actively listening to them by giving direct eye-contact and nodding. One important to note is that never interrupt anyone. Always let them finish first beforeanother one begins.

Step 4: Listen Comes First, Talk Follows

How? Ensure everyone has listened to one another points of view. It can be done by taking turn to speak and leaving the discussion part at last. State once again the problem is nothing personal and no accusation should be made.

Why? By turn-taking, everyone can finish talking and voices of all sides can be heard indiscriminantly. This can promote willingness to listen to opposing opinions.

Example: We can prepare pieces of paper with different numbers written on them. Then, ask different members to pick one and talk according to the sequence of the number. After everyone’s finished, advise everyone to use “I” more than “You” in the discussion period to avoid others thinking that it is an accusation.

Step 5: Understand the Facts, Then Address the Problem

How? List out ALL the facts first. Ask everyone to tell what they know about the problems.

Why? Sometimes your facts are unknown to the others while they may know something we don’t. Missing out on these facts could possibly lead to inaccurate capture of the problem. Also, different known facts can lead to different perception of the matter. It also helps everyone better understand the problem and can eventually help reach a solution.

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Example: While everyone is expressing their own views, ask them to write down everything they know that is true to the problem. As soon as everyone has finished, all facts can be noted and everyone’s understanding of the problem is raised.

Step 6: Solve the Problem Together

How? Knowing what everyone’s thinking, it is now time to resolve the conflict. Up to this point, everyone should have understood the problem better. So, it is everyone’s time to suggest some solutions. It is important not to have one giving all the solutions.

Why? Having everyone suggesting their solutions is important as they will not feel excluded and their opinions are considered. Besides, it may also generate more solutions that can better resolve the conflicts. Everyone will more likely be satisfied with the result.

Example: After discussion, ask all members to suggest any possible solutions and stress that all solutions are welcomed. State clearly that we are looking for the best outcomes for everyone’s sake rather than battling to win over one another. Then, evaluate all the solutions and pick the one that is in favor of everyone.

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