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10 Things Will Happen When You Stop Limiting Yourself

10 Things Will Happen When You Stop Limiting Yourself

Too often do people limit themselves by not being sure of their success.

I know many great individuals with huge potential who just don’t try new things because they fear failure, who don’t feel comfortable in their own skin and as a result don’t approach new people or speak up. That’s an awful way to live life. Because — we’re all equally gifted and it’s all a matter of choice and initiative whether we’ll become the best version of ourselves or live an average life. But if you stop limiting yourself, big transformations will start happening in every area of your life right away.

Here are the most important transformations you’ll experience once you stop limiting yourself:

1. You’ll have bigger goals.

People who always think they can’t succeed are scared to dream big. They don’t dare to set big goals and share them with others. And that’s why they never achieve anything better in life. But if you let go of the limitations you set to yourself, you’ll know you can reach anything you dream about. And so can everyone else.

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So define your deepest desires and ideal lifestyle today, believe you can get there. And write down the things you need to do, think of the person you need to become and the changes you’ll need to make to get closer to your goals.

2. You’ll improve your skills.

As a result of believing in yourself and your abilities more, you’ll work on fighting your weaknesses and improving your strengths. You’ll gain knowledge and experience in new areas, may even master a skill after some time. That will change your perspective of life and you’ll aim even higher after that.

3. You’ll overcome shyness.

Social anxiety can be a result of the lack of self-esteem. But once you stop limiting yourself, there won’t be anything to stop you from communicating with people freely and confidently. A great way to start is by approaching one new person daily, no matter how uncomfortable or scary it may feel. Once you do that, you’ll see it’s nothing impossible. Even if it’s awkward the first few times, you’ll soon feel better around new people and will think of stuff to talk about more easily.

4. You’ll get things done.

Limiting yourself also ruins your productivity. But once you let go of that, you’ll actually get to work more often and will be more focused (instead of procrastinating, thinking you’ll fail, or having doubts). The results will be great too and soon other people will start noticing it.

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5. You’ll be present.

Another way we usually limit ourselves is by living in the past and dreaming of the future, while ignoring the present. We constantly get back to what was before, compare it to what is now and have regrets. We also fear the future, try to predict what might happen or imagine the worst case scenario.

But life happens here in the present moment. And once you realize that, you’ll be able to be more mindful of what’s currently happening.

6. You’ll enjoy life more.

Living in the present has another huge benefit – you truly experience every day, find happiness and contentment, and appreciate the things you have much more.

7. You’ll generate ideas.

Once you’re confident and free from limitations and mental barriers, you’ll also get your creative juices flowing. You’ll start coming up with new ideas, will handle daily problems more easily, and will start working on new projects all the time.

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8. You won’t get depressed.

Depression is often a result of the stress and unhappiness we bring to ourselves by not following our path in life, not doing things we enjoy, not being social or expecting the best to happen. But when you stop limiting yourself you’ll always be doing something – either spending quality time with loved ones and new friends, being focused on your current activity and doing productive work, or working on your goals and dreams.

So there won’t really be any time and reason to get depressed.

9. You’ll take action more often.

Another great benefit of not limiting yourself is that you’ll become action-oriented. Most people have too many doubts and insecurities, fear of failure and distractions get in the way too. But once you have peace of mind and the right amount of confidence, you’ll also take initiative, act upon your goals and turn ideas into reality.

You’ll do many other little things like asking a question when you want to know something, not waiting for the perfect timing and conditions to do something, expressing your opinion and thus simplifying communication. And much more.

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It all starts with doing something right away instead of overthinking it.

10. You’ll become a role model.

One of the best ways to inspire others is to do something great with your life. And if you’re purpose-oriented, know what you want and are going after it, don’t waste time but work hard on what you believe in, and have fun at the same time and are grateful, then you’ll be a great role model.

People will look up to you. You’ll motivate them to do the same without saying anything or making them do so, but simply by following your path and letting them see your progress. So that’s how the life of someone who’s not limiting himself looks like. And you can have the same very soon if you simply decide that you want more out of life and are ready to fight for it.

So what can you do today to stop limiting yourself and start living the life you deserve?

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Last Updated on March 30, 2020

What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

Have you ever walked into a room and felt like your nerves simply couldn’t handle it? Your heart beats fast, you start to sweat, and you feel like all eyes are on you (even if they’re really not). This is just one of the many ways that being self-conscious can rear its ugly head.

You may not even realize you’re self-conscious, and you may be wondering, “What does self-conscious mean?” That’s a good place to start.

This article will define self-consciousness, show how practically everyone has faced it at one point or another, and give you tips to avoid it.

What Does Self-Conscious Mean?

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, self-conscious is defined as “conscious of one’s own acts or states as belonging to or originating in oneself.”[1]

Not so bad, right? There’s another definition, though — one that speaks more to what you’re going through: “feeling uncomfortably conscious of oneself as an object of the observation of others.” For those of us who regularly deal with extreme self-consciousness, that second definition sounds about right.

There are many different ways self-consciousness can spring up. You may feel self-conscious around people you know, like your family members or closest friends. You may feel self-conscious at work, even though you spend hours every week around your co-workers. Or you may feel self-conscious when out in public and surrounded by strangers. However, you probably don’t feel self-conscious when you’re home alone.

How to Stop Being Too Self-Conscious

When you’re in the throes of self-consciousness, it’s nearly impossible to remember how to stop feeling that way. That’s why it’s so important to prepare ahead of time, when you’re feeling ready to tackle the problem instead of succumbing to it.

Here are a variety of ways to feel better about yourself and stop thinking about how others see you.

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1. Ask Yourself, “So What?”

One way to banish negative, self-conscious thoughts is to do just that: banish them.

The next time you walk into a room and feel your face getting red, think to yourself, “So what?” How much does it really matter if people don’t like how you look or act? What’s the worst that could happen?

Most of the time, you’ll find that you don’t have a good answer to this question. Then, you can immediately start assigning such thoughts less importance. With self-awareness, you can acknowledge that your negative thoughts are present and realize that you don’t agree with them.[2] They’re just thoughts, after all.

2. Be Honest

A lie that self-consciousness might tell is that there’s one way to act or feel. Honestly, though, everyone else is just figuring life out as well. There isn’t a preferred way to show up to an event, gathering, or public place. What you can do is be honest with your feelings and thoughts.[3]

If you feel offended by something someone says, you don’t have to smile to be polite or laugh to fit in with the crowd. Instead, you can politely say why you disagree or excuse yourself and find a group of people who you relate to better. If you’re nervous, don’t overcompensate by trying to look relaxed and casual — it’ll be obvious you’re putting on a front. Instead, nothing is more endearing than saying, “I’m a little nervous!” to a room of people who probably feel the exact same way.

On the same note, if you don’t understand why someone wants you to do something, question it. You can do this at work, at home, or even with people you don’t know well. Nobody should force you to do something you don’t want to do.

Also, even if you’re willing to do what’s asked of you, there’s nothing wrong with asking for more clarification. People will realize that you’re not a person to be bossed around.

3. Understand Why You’re Struggling at Work

Being self-conscious at work can get in the way of your daily responsibilities, your relationships with co-workers, and even your career as a whole. If you’re facing some sort of conflict but you’re too nervous to speak up, you may be at the whim of what happens to you instead of taking some control.

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If you’re usually confident at work, you may be wondering where this new self-consciousness is coming from. It’s possible that you’re dealing with burnout.[4] Common signs are anxiety, fatigue and distraction, all of which can leave you feeling under-confident.

4. Succeed at Something

When you create success in your life, it’s easier to feel confident[5] and less self-conscious. If you feel self-conscious at work, finish the project that’s been looming over your head. If you feel self-conscious in the gym, complete an advanced workout class.

Exposing yourself to what you’re scared of and then succeeding at it in some way (even just by finishing it) can do wonders for your self-esteem. The more confidence you build, the more likely you are to have more success in the future, which will create a cycle of confidence-building.

5. Treat All of You — Not Just Your Self-Consciousness

Trying to solve your self-consciousness alone may not treat the root of the problem. Instead, take a well-rounded approach to lower your self-consciousness and build confidence in areas where you may struggle.

Even professional counselors are embracing this holistic type of treatment[6] because they feel that the health of the mind and body are inextricably linked. This approach combines physical, spiritual, and psychological components. Common activities and treatments include meditation, yoga, massage, and healthy changes to diet and exercise.

If much of this is new to you, it will pay to give it a try. You never know how it will impact you.

If you’re feeling self-conscious about how your body looks, a massage that makes you feel great could boost your confidence. If you try a new workout, you could have something exciting to talk about the next time you’re in a group setting.

Putting yourself in a new situation and learning that you can get through it with grace can give you the confidence to get through all sorts of events and nerve-wracking moments.

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6. Make the Changes That Are Within Your Control

Let’s say you walk into a room and you’re self-conscious about how you look. However, you may have put a lot of time and effort into your outfit. Even though it may stand out, this is how you have chosen to express yourself.

You have to work on your internal confidence, not your external appearance. There’s nothing to change other than your outlook.

On the other hand, maybe there’s something that you don’t like about yourself that you can change. For example, maybe you hate how a birthmark on your face looks or have varicose veins that you think are unsightly. If you can do something about these things, do it! There’s nothing wrong with changing your appearance (or skills, education, etc.) if it’s going to make you more confident.

You don’t have to accept your current situation for acceptance’s sake. There’s no award for putting up with something you hate. Confidence is also required to make changes that are scary, even if they’re for the better. Plus, it may be an easier fix than you thought. For example, treating varicose veins doesn’t have to involve surgery — sometimes simple compression stockings will take care of the problem.[7]

7. Realize That Everyone Has Awkward Moments

Everyone has said something awkward to someone else and lived to tell the tale. We’ve all forgotten somebody’s name or said, “You too!” when the concession stand girl says to enjoy our movie. Not only are these things uber-common, but they’re not nearly as embarrassing as you feel they are.

Think about how you react when someone else does something awkward. Do you think, “Wow, that person’s such a loser!” or do you think, “What a relief, I’m not the only one who does that.” Chances are good that’s the same reaction others have to you when you stumble.

Remember, self-consciousness is a state of mind that you have control over. You don’t have to feel this way. Do what you need to in order to build your confidence, put your self-consciousness in perspective, and start exercising your “I feel awesome about myself” muscle. It’ll get easier with time.

When Is Being Self-Conscious a Good Thing?

Self-consciousness can sometimes be a good thing[8], but you have to take the awkwardness and nerves out of it.

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In this case, “self-aware” is a much better term. Knowing how you come off to people is an excellent trait; you’ll be able to read a room and understand how what you do and say affects others. These are fantastic skills for people work and personal relationships.

Self-awareness helps you dress appropriately for the occasion, tells you that you’re talking too loud or not loud enough, and guides a conversation so you don’t offend or bore anyone.

It’s not about being someone you’re not — that can actually have adverse effects, just like self-consciousness. Instead, it’s about turning up certain aspects of yourself to perform well in the situation.

Final Thoughts

When you’re self-conscious, you’re constantly battling with yourself in an effort to control how other people view you. You try to change yourself to suit what you think other people want to see.

The truth, though, is that you can’t actually control how other people view you — and you may not even be correct about how they view you in the first place.

Being confident doesn’t happen overnight. Instead, it happens in small steps as you slowly build your confidence and say “no” to your self-consciousness. It also requires accepting that you’re going to feel self-conscious sometimes, and that’s okay.

Sometimes worrying that there is a problem can be more stressful than the problem itself. Feeling bad for feeling self-conscious can be more troublesome than simply feeling it and getting on with the day.

Forgive yourself for being human and make the small changes that will lead to better confidence in the future.

More Tips for Improving Your Self-Esteem

Featured photo credit: Cata via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Merriam-Webster: Self-conscious
[2] Bustle: 7 Tips On How To Stop Feeling Self-Conscious
[3] Marc and Angel: 10 Things to Remember When You Feel Unsure of Yourself
[4] Bostitch: How to Protect Small Businesses From Burnout
[5] Psychology Today: Self-conscious? Get Over It
[6] Wake Forest University: Embracing Holistic Medicine
[7] Center for Vein Restoration: What Causes Venous Ulcers, and How Are They Treated?
[8] Scientific American: The Pros and Cons of Being Self-Aware

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