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People Who Cry Often Are Not Weak, But Mentally Stronger

People Who Cry Often Are Not Weak, But Mentally Stronger

As a culture obsessed with appearance, strength and achievement, it is easy to see why crying is not on the list for most desirable traits. We consider crying messy and weak. If you are doing life right, then there won’t be a reason to cry. People who cry a lot are often categorized as overly emotional or erratic. And while that may be true for some, in reality, people who cry a lot ‘have it together’ in the ways that count.

Here are 8 reasons why people who cry often are actually mentally stronger than the rest of the pack.

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1. They are healthier

Stuffing those emotions down is not healthy for anyone. When under stress, it is common in our culture to celebrate those who can ‘tough it out’. In reality, unchecked stress leads to a load of health issues such as an increased risk for heart attack, anxiety and high blood pressure. According to Dr. William H. Frey, crying alleviates stress both for the mind and the body. He says that crying in fact, lowers cholesterol levels and decreases a chemical that can lead to anxiety. To further support this, researchers from the University of Southern Florida suggest that crying is a way to restore us physiologically and psychologically. When it comes to taking care of their mental and physical health, people who cry often have the right idea.

2. They are happier

It is common misconception that frequent criers are the saddest people. On the contrary, crying improves your mood. In a research study conducted by Dr. Frey, 88.8% of participants found that they had an improved mood after shedding tears. Crying provides a flood of emotional relief that allows us to leave the sadness behind. We all have a reason to cry at some point in life, and those who embrace a good cry are able to address their pain and look towards a brighter tomorrow.

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3. They are braver

Whether you believe that vulnerability is strength or weakness (it is a strength), there is no denying that it is a challenge. It takes a brave person to allow your emotions to be exposed in front of other people. Those who cry are knowingly inviting people into their heart at the risk (or likelihood) of being judged, misunderstood or belittled. Most of us aren’t willing to be vulnerable for this reason, yet the criers take the risk. Now, who said crying is a weakness?

4. They are better communicators

A picture is worth a thousand words, and I believe the same goes for crying. People who cry often have a knack for communication. Through tears we offer an honest and meaningful picture of our hearts. It is a common practice for people who cry a lot to use this to express themselves. This only enhances their ability to communicate in other ways.

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5. They have better relationships

Vulnerability is what connects people on a deeper level and crying is vulnerability at its finest. Allowing someone in to your heart in such an unmasked way is a risk that can bring great reward. People who cry a lot experience the connection with others that comes from being vulnerable with others. For friends who are trustworthy and true, the benefit of allowing them to witness your tears is often a deeper and more connected relationship.

6. They are more honest

Tears are authentic. As they roll down your face, you can’t help but admit to yourself what you are feeling. Crying is not only brave, but is an honest reflection of the heart. People who cry a lot are frequently facing their own reality. When anyone can admit to the state of their soul, it leads to a more honest life.

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7. They have a better understanding of themselves

Those who cry often are more likely to have strong self awareness. They seek to understand their own emotions. Self awareness is a state that is achieved through time and practice. People who cry a lot have had more practice dwelling on the inner workings of their mind and heart. It’s often true that people who don’t let loose and cry often struggle to explain or understand their emotions.

8. They more fully experience life

Life is truly full of highs and lows. No one can make it through without experiencing joy and suffering. People who cry more often, whether sad or happy tears, are able to feel the emotions that add color to life. Suffering and joy go hand in hand, in that you cannot numb one and still experience the other. People who cry more often enhance their overall quality of life by refusing to numb and embracing the ride for what it is.

No matter your gender, personality type or circumstances in life, it is easy to see the benefits of a good cry. If you want to fully experience a healthy and strong mind, consider letting those tears roll free.

Featured photo credit: Aleshyn_Andrei via shutterstock.com

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Last Updated on December 3, 2019

10 Life Lessons You’d Better Learn Early on in Life

10 Life Lessons You’d Better Learn Early on in Life

There are so many lessons I wish I had learned while I was young enough to appreciate and apply them. The thing with wisdom, and often with life lessons in general, is that they’re learned in retrospect, long after we needed them. The good news is that other people can benefit from our experiences and the lessons we’ve learned.

Here’re 10 important life lessons you should learn early on:

1. Money Will Never Solve Your Real Problems

Money is a tool; a commodity that buys you necessities and some nice “wants,” but it is not the panacea to your problems.

There are a great many people who are living on very little, yet have wonderfully full and happy lives… and there are sadly a great many people are living on quite a lot, yet have terribly miserable lives.

Money can buy a nice home, a great car, fabulous shoes, even a bit of security and some creature comforts, but it cannot fix a broken relationship, or cure loneliness, and the “happiness” it brings is only fleeting and not the kind that really and truly matters. Happiness is not for sale. If you’re expecting the “stuff” you can buy to “make it better,” you will never be happy.

2. Pace Yourself

Often when we’re young, just beginning our adult journey we feel as though we have to do everything at once. We need to decide everything, plan out our lives, experience everything, get to the top, find true love, figure out our life’s purpose, and do it all at the same time.

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Slow down—don’t rush into things. Let your life unfold. Wait a bit to see where it takes you, and take time to weigh your options. Enjoy every bite of food, take time to look around you, let the other person finish their side of the conversation. Allow yourself time to think, to mull a bit.

Taking action is critical. Working towards your goals and making plans for the future is commendable and often very useful, but rushing full-speed ahead towards anything is a one-way ticket to burnout and a good way to miss your life as it passes you by.

3. You Can’t Please Everyone

“I don’t know the secret to success, but the secret to failure is trying to please everyone” – Bill Cosby.

You don’t need everyone to agree with you or even like you. It’s human nature to want to belong, to be liked, respected and valued, but not at the expense of your integrity and happiness. Other people cannot give you the validation you seek. That has to come from inside.

Speak up, stick to your guns, assert yourself when you need to, demand respect, stay true to your values.

4. Your Health Is Your Most Valuable Asset

Health is an invaluable treasure—always appreciate, nurture, and protect it. Good health is often wasted on the young before they have a chance to appreciate it for what it’s worth.

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We tend to take our good health for granted, because it’s just there. We don’t have to worry about it, so we don’t really pay attention to it… until we have to.

Heart disease, bone density, stroke, many cancers—the list of many largely preventable diseases is long, so take care of your health now, or you’ll regret it later on.

5. You Don’t Always Get What You Want

“Life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.” – John Lennon

No matter how carefully you plan and how hard you work, sometimes things just don’t work out the way you want them to… and that’s okay.

We have all of these expectations; predetermined visions of what our “ideal” life will look like, but all too often, that’s not the reality of the life we end up with. Sometimes our dreams fail and sometimes we just change our minds mid-course. Sometimes we have to flop to find the right course and sometimes we just have to try a few things before we find the right direction.

6. It’s Not All About You

You are not the epicenter of the universe. It’s very difficult to view the world from a perspective outside of your own, since we are always so focused on what’s happening in our own lives. What do I have to do today? What will this mean for me, for my career, for my life? What do I want?

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It’s normal to be intensely aware of everything that’s going on in your own life, but you need to pay as much attention to what’s happening around you, and how things affect other people in the world as you do to your own life. It helps to keep things in perspective.

7. There’s No Shame in Not Knowing

No one has it all figured out. Nobody has all the answers. There’s no shame in saying “I don’t know.” Pretending to be perfect doesn’t make you perfect. It just makes you neurotic to keep up the pretense of manufactured perfection.

We have this idea that there is some kind of stigma or shame in admitting our limitations or uncertainly, but we can’t possibly know everything. We all make mistakes and mess up occasionally. We learn as we go, that’s life.

Besides—nobody likes a know-it-all. A little vulnerability makes you human and oh so much more relatable.

8. Love Is More Than a Feeling; It’s a Choice

That burst of initial exhilaration, pulse quickening love and passion does not last long. But that doesn’t mean long-lasting love is not possible.

Love is not just a feeling; it’s a choice that you make every day. We have to choose to let annoyances pass, to forgive, to be kind, to respect, to support, to be faithful.

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Relationships take work. Sometimes it’s easy and sometimes it’s incredibly hard. It is up to us to choose how we want to act, think and speak in a relationship.

9. Perspective Is a Beautiful Thing

Typically, when we’re worried or upset, it’s because we’ve lost perspective. Everything that is happening in our lives seems so big, so important, so do or die, but in the grand picture, this single hiccup often means next to nothing.

The fight we’re having, the job we didn’t get, the real or imagined slight, the unexpected need to shift course, the thing we wanted, but didn’t get. Most of it won’t matter 20, 30, 40 years from now. It’s hard to see long term when all you know is short term, but unless it’s life-threatening, let it go, and move on.

10. Don’t Take Anything for Granted

We often don’t appreciate what we have until it’s gone: that includes your health, your family and friends, your job, the money you have or think you will have tomorrow.

When you’re young, it seems that your parents will always be there, but they won’t. You think you have plenty of time to get back in touch with your old friends or spend time with new ones, but you don’t. You have the money to spend, or you think you’ll have it next month, but you might not.

Nothing in your life is not guaranteed to be there tomorrow, including those you love.

This is a hard life lesson to learn, but it may be the most important of all: Life can change in an instant. Make sure you appreciate what you have, while you still have it.

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Featured photo credit: Ben Eaton via unsplash.com

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