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Do These 10 Things Everyday To Gradually Become Mentally Stronger

Do These 10 Things Everyday To Gradually Become Mentally Stronger

To continue to be mentally strong in today’s society is a challenge in itself. We all carry emotional scars and if they’re not healed we can inflict our insecurities, biases, frustration and pain onto others. However, everyone has the potential to heal, change and become better than they were. Although, it will take a lot of work on your part.

In order to be mentally stronger every day, there are a few things you should incorporate in your daily agenda.

1. Be thankful and show gratitude

I like to start my day off with being thankful. I wake up and I say a few word of thanks to my creator for the simple things in life. It doesn’t matter if you have a religion or not, you can still be thankful for things that you have in your life. Why wait till Thanksgiving every year to be thankful? There are so many things to be thankful for every day.

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Every day you wake up gives you a new day to start over and claim the life you desire and deserve. It’s important for you to learn to be thankful, in order for you to become mentally stronger daily. Life will deal you some hard times but in order for you to champion through it, you must learn to be thankful for the little things in life. It’s like looking at the glass and feeling that it is half full: be optimistic. Showing gratitude to others is about showing some form of appreciation. You can say your grateful but showing someone you are grateful can go a really long way. For example, why do you think it is suggested to send a thank you card after an interview? This is because as a visual element it sticks a little bit better in the mind than quick fleeting words of thanks. It doesn’t mean that the person expects something in return when they do something, sometimes it just lifts your spirits to know you are appreciated. A simple handmade card or letter with genuinely expressed gratitude, detailing why you are grateful, could make a huge impact.

2. Meditate

Yes, I know! You have probably heard about meditating a million times by now. Meditation is said to improve focus, mental clarity and reduce or eliminate stress. That is how meditation can make you mentally stronger every day. It can also give you peace, which I feel is desperately needed in today’s society. As a beginner, you will possibly notice how busy your mind is zipping about with your to-do lists, ideas, worries and more. Don’t worry, over time your mind will quite down with continued practice.

3. Exercise

Release those endorphins. That’s right! Working out is, of course, important to be mentally stronger every day. You can pick the fitness activity of your choice soccer, hiking, skating, tennis, or whatever you choose. I would encourage you to make it fun and include someone as your workout partner if you don’t prefer to exercise alone.

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4. Eat healthy

Fueling your cells with the proper energy (healthy food) is vital for being mentally stronger every day. I’m aware that some of you out there may not like fruits or vegetables. However, can you truly say you have tried every fruit or vegetable? Probably not! There are so many different types of fruits and veggies and they can be prepared in so many different ways. Every fruit and vegetable has its own unique nutritious purpose that it can provide to our bodies. I think it’s worth the effort to try to find some creative ways to cook or juice them to your desired taste. If you have a special diet where you don’t eat certain foods or drinks make sure you are not missing out on nutrition through finding other healthy sources for what you need. Whole wheat, vegetables, fruit, grains, nuts, and legumes are some of the things you could incorporate into your diet.

5. Create a Healthy Environment

In order for you to be mentally stronger every day your environment needs to be a healthy one. If your environment lacks structure or organization it can affect your mental strength. You can become quite overwhelmed when your home and bedroom area lacks organization. Create an environment that relaxes you and makes you happy, and include plants for healthy filtered air inside your home. Decorate your bedroom or home with things that will make you feel relaxed, comfortable and happy when you look around.

6. Smile and Show Compassion

You never know what the power of a smile can do for someone. In life, we pass each other and never really know the burdens or struggles life is dealing others and ourselves from moment to moment. It helps to smile and show a little compassion towards others, you may need it yourself one day later in life. When you’re going through something it’s good to smile your way through it and force yourself to think of anything positive that could come from the situation. To be a mentally stronger person every day make smiling, laughter (not at someone else’s expense), joy, and compassion a part of your daily life.

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7. Take Responsibility

Take responsibility for your actions, apologize (genuinely) and move on (even if society does not). Being in denial or lying can hold you back from growing stronger mentally every day. It can also destroy relationships with business partners, friends, family, and spouses.

8. Write in a Journal Daily

Writing in a journal daily is also a way to help you become mentally stronger every day. Journal writing allows you to reflect on your activities for the day. It can include what you have experienced, your feelings, concerns or anything you wish. It could be therapeutic, sometimes we hold our feelings inside and that is not healthy. I use my journal to write daily what I am thankful for, things I achieved that day and other topics. Journals can allow you to see your development over a period of time as a person and appreciate your journey.

9. Power Off Before Bed

In today’s society, some of us are glued to our phones, computers, and other devices. Before you go to sleep you should power them off. Your bedroom should be for sleeping, but so many of us turn our beds into an office. We do this by using our laptops in our bed and taking business calls from our bed at night as well. I understand that with some professions you are always on call. However, your sleep time is precious and your body needs it in order to replenish its own power. Powering off your devices will help you be mentally stronger every day.

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10. Know Yourself and Be a Better Version of Yourself

You are not very likely to be a mentally stronger person if you live your life trying to imitate or be someone else. We are all made different and have different journeys for a reason. The sooner you discover the gifts and beauty you were created to offer the world, the more beautiful you will be to the world because you will be more confident and happy.

Plus, it is really unhealthy to live your life and model it obsessively after someone else; it may create envy and jealousy within you towards that person. So if you find yourself constantly thinking about what someone else has and what you don’t, you should evaluate why it matters so much to you. Are you possibly insecure? Everybody has problems, even the Joneses, so why would you try to keep up with them? Get to know yourself and become a better version of yourself, it will make you mentally stronger every day.

Featured photo credit: Man Celebrating Freedom In nature With Glacier/Dan cooper via imcreator.com

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Last Updated on August 19, 2019

How to Be True to Yourself and Live the Life You Want

How to Be True to Yourself and Live the Life You Want

We live in a world that constantly tells us what to do, how to act, what to be. Knowing how to be true to yourself and live the life you want can be a challenge.

When someone asks how we are, we assume that the person does not mean the question sincerely, for it would lead to an in depth conversation. So telling them that you are good or fine, even if you’re not, is the usual answer.

In an ideal world, we would stop and truly listen. We wouldn’t be afraid to be ourselves. Instead, when we answer about how we are doing, our mask, the persona we show the world, tightens. Sometimes even more so than it might have been before. Eventually, it becomes hard to take off, even when you’re alone.

Imagine a world where we asked how someone was doing and they really told us. Imagine a world where there were no masks, only transparency when we talked to one another.

If you want to live in a world that celebrates who you are, mistakes and all, take off the mask. It doesn’t mean you have to be positive or fine all the time.

According to a Danish psychologist, Svend Brinkman, we expect each other to be happy and fine every second, and we expect it of ourselves. And that “has a dark side.”[1] Positive psychology can have its perks but not at the expense at hiding how you truly feel in order to remain seemingly positive to others.

No one can feel positive all the time and yet, that is what our culture teaches us to embrace. We have to unlearn this. That said, telling others you are ‘“fine”’ all the time is actually detrimental to your wellbeing, because it stops you from being assertive, from being authentic or your truest self.

When you acknowledge a feeling, it leads you to the problem that’s causing that feeling; and once you identify the problem, you can find a solution to it. When you hide that feeling, you stuff it way down so no one can help you.You can’t even help yourself.

Feelings are there for one reason: to be felt. That doesn’t mean you have to act on that feeling. It just means that you start the process of problem solving so you can live the life you want.

1. Embrace Your Vulnerability

When you are your true self, you can better self-advocate or stand up for what you need. Your self-expression matters, and you should value your voice. It’s okay to need things, it’s okay to speak up, and it’s okay not to be okay.

Telling someone you are simply “fine” when you are not, does your story and your journey a great disservice. Being true to yourself entails embracing all aspects of your existence.

When you bring your whole self to the table, there is nothing that you can’t beat. Here’re 7 benefits of being vulnerable you should learn.

Can you take off the mask? This is the toughest thing anyone can do. We have learned to wait until we are safe before we start to be authentic.

In relationships especially, this can be hard. Some people avoid vulnerability at any cost. And in our relationship with ourselves, we can look in the mirror and immediately put on the mask.

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It all starts with your story. You have been on your own unique journey. That journey has led you here, to the person you are today. You have to be unafraid, and embrace all aspects of that journey.

You should seek to thrive, not just survive. That means you do not have to compete or compare yourself with anyone.

Authenticity means you are enough. It’s enough to be who you are to get what you want.

What if for the first time ever, you were real? What if you said what you wanted to say, did what you wanted to do, and didn’t apologize for it?

You were assertive, forthcoming in your opinions or actions to stand for what is right for you, (rather than being passive or aggressive) in doing so. You didn’t let things get to you. You knew you had something special to offer.

That’s where we all should be.

So, answer me this:

How are you, really?

And know that no matter the answer, you should still be accepted.

Bravery is in the understanding that you still may not be accepted for your truth.

Bravery is knowing you matter even when others say that you do not.

Bravery is believing in yourself when all evidence counters doing so (i.e. past failures or losses)

Bravery is in being vulnerable while knowing vulnerability is a sign of strength.

It’s taking control.

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2. Choose Your Attitude in Adversity

You can take control of your destiny and live the life you want by being true to yourself. You can start anytime. You can start today.

You can start with one day at a time, just facing what happens that day. Most of us get overwhelmed when faced with the prospect of a big change. Even if the only thing we change is our attitude.

In one instant, you can become a different person with a change of attitude. When you take control of your attitude, you become able to better understand what is around you. This allows you to move forward.

Originally, you may have had a life plan. It could have started when you were little; you were hoping to become a mermaid, doctor, astronaut or all three when you grew up. You were hoping to be someone. You were hoping to be remembered.

You can still dream those dreams, but eventually reality sets in. Obstacles and struggles arise. You set on a different path when the last one didn’t work out. You think of all the “shoulds” in your life in living the life you want. You should be doing this…should be doing that…

Clayton Barbeau, psychologist, coined the term “shoulding yourself.’[2] When we are set on one path and find ourselves doing something different. It becomes all the things you should be doing rather than seeing the opportunities right in front of you.

But in all this disarray, did you lose sight of the real you?

It may be in our perceived failures and blunders that we lose sight of who we are, because we try to maintain position and status.

In being who we really are and achieving what we really want, we need to be resilient: How to Build Resilience to Face What Life Throws at You

It means that we do not see all possibilities of what might happen, but must trust ourselves to begin again, and continue to build the life we want. In the face of adversity, you must choose your attitude.

Can attitude overcome adversity? It certainly helps. While seeking to be true to yourself and live the life you want, you will have to face a fact:

Change will happen.

Whether that change is good or bad is unique to each person and their perspective.

You might have to start over, once, twice, a few times. It doesn’t mean that everything will be okay, but that you will be okay. What remains or should remain is the true you. When you’ve lost sight of that, you’ve lost sight of everything.

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And then, you rebuild. Moment after moment, day after day. We all have a choice, and in this moment, that matters.

You can choose to have a positive attitude, seeing the silver lining in each situation and, where there is none, the potential for one. Maybe that silver lining is you and what you will do with the situation. How will you use it for something good?

That’s how you can tap into yourself and your power. Sometimes it happens by accident, sometimes on purpose. It can happen when we aren’t even looking for it, or it can be your only focus. Everyone gets there differently.

You can rise, or you can remain. Your choice.

When the worst happens, you can rely on your authenticity to pull you through. That’s because Self Advocacy, speaking up to let others know what you need, is part of finding the real you.

There is nothing wrong with asking for help. Or sometimes, helping others can help us deal with the pain of a hurtful situation. You decide how you’re going to help others, and suddenly, you become your best self.

3. Do What Makes You Happy When No One’s Looking

Being the best version of you has nothing to do with your success or your status. It has everything to do with your Character, what you do when no one’s looking.

In order to create the life you want, you have to be the person you want to be. Faking it till you make it is just a way to white knuckle it through your journey. You have the fire inside of you to make things right, to put the pieces together, to live authentically. And Character is how you get there.

If you fall down and you help another up while you’re down there, it’s like you rise twice.

Along with attitude, your character is about the choices you make rather than what happens to you.

Yes, it’s about doing the right thing even when obstacles seem insurmountable.  It’s about using that mountain you’ve been given to show others it can be moved.  It’s about being unapologetically you, taking control, choosing your attitude in adversity and being the best version of you to create the life you want.

How do you know what you really want? Is it truly status or success?

Unfortunately, these things do not always bring happiness. And aspects of our image or “performance driven existence” may not achieve satisfaction. Materialism is part of our refusal to accept ourselves as enough. All the things we use to repress our true selves are about being enough.

“Enoughness” is what we truly seek, but ego gets in the way.

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Ego is the perception of self as outer worth. It’s not REAL self worth.

Ego represses our true self with a new self— the self of chasing ‘“Am I ever enough?”’ questions. And instead of filling our true selves with self-love and acceptance, when we “should ourselves” and chase “enoughness,” we feed the ego or our image.

It’s important to realize YOU ARE ENOUGH, without all the material trappings.

Stanford psychologist Meagan O’Reilly describes the damage of not thinking we are enough. One of her tactics for combating this is to complete the sentence,[3]

“If I believed I were already enough, I’d ____”

What would you do if you felt you were enough?

By believing you are enough, you can live the life you want.

So many fake it to try to get there, and they end up losing themselves when they lose more and more touch with their Authenticity.

Final Thoughts

By being yourself, you are being brave. By acknowledging all you can be, you tell the universe that you can until you believe it too. The steps are easy, and you are worth it. All of it is about the purpose you are leading and the passion that is your fuel.

Being true to yourself is all about mastering how to live life authentically rather than faking or forcing it. Having the life you want (and deserve) is about being trusting in yourself and the purpose you are living for. Both need passion behind it, fueling it each second, or you will experience burn out.

When you are authentic, you can call the road you walk your own. When you live your life for you and not just the results of all your actions (faking it till you make it), you can let go of what you don’t need. This clarifies and pushes purpose to you, living for something that is greater than you.

You will find that making decisions based on what will actually achieve your goals, will help you attain the life you want, and your success with each step, will allow you to enjoy the process. Good luck!

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Featured photo credit: Ariana Prestes via unsplash.com

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