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7 Ways We Limit Ourselves Without Even Realizing It

7 Ways We Limit Ourselves Without Even Realizing It

We make excuses.  We stay in the safe end of the pool and find ways to ignore anything that might challenge us in anyway.  We allow circumstances and our belief that we have no choices be our guide instead.  Forgetting that we can create happiness as much as we can create misery seems to become a way of life.  Stepping away from what we have been taught and allowing ourselves to make our own path doesn’t even seem to cross the minds of too many of us anymore.  And if you don’t believe me that we all forgo actions that we really wish we had the courage to take, read more here…

We go looking for failure.

Not really on purpose, but sometimes, it is all we can focus on.  We have all stumbled a time or two as we have traveled through our life and the fear of another setback is just something that we can do without.  So we expect the worst.  Every time.  We never believe we have a shot at that promotion we really want so we never fill out the paperwork, only to go back to doing the same thing we despise.  We never ask that girl out for fear of being rejected after allowing ourselves to be vulnerable.  We never take that risk.  The same risk life begs of us.

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We follow the crowd.

It is easier to never have to make a decision or take any responsibility either.  We just follow the “school of fish” never stopping to ask, “Is this what I really want to be doing?”  Falling in line is easy.  But what happens if you change your mind?  If your experiences have somehow changed your perspective on life?  No one promotes “going against the grain” because that is not what most of us do.  We take the easiest route instead of the road less traveled.  We have been conditioned that way.

We play it safe.

Growing up, we told we could be anything we want, but only if we were careful and cautious.  We could never “push the envelope” too much.  Most kids get hurt because they were not thinking about being safe — they were caught up in the moment.  Now as adults, we are missing out on those glorious moments of absolute freedom because our biggest concern seems to be one of security instead.  Our fear leaves us paralyzed as we hold out in the safety of what we know.  Our excitement of doing something new and maybe a little dangerous is just what our psyche needs.

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We have no hope.   

The world nowadays is full of turmoil, hatred, and animosity that will not diminish overnight.  And our future generations are never going to believe that any action they take will make an impact if they don’t have hope.  In order for us to take a step away from the common thread, we must understand that our purpose will stand for something, even long after we are gone.  Instead of compromising what we can’t do with laziness and justifications as why something won’t work, let’s give it a shot anyway.  What have we got to lose?

We stopped listening to our hearts.

At some, point, filling our pockets with cash, loading up on material possessions, and taking from others because we could became our way of life.  In the end, we don’t feel any more full because we have “stuff” and our regrets become almost too much to bear as we suffer through guilt and mistakes made along the way.  Our hearts beg for us to listen to them — to find what feeds our souls and to enhance the lives of others in whatever we can.  So we play in that local golf fundraiser never really taking the time to see how we can make a difference in someone else’s life.  But in order to really understand what our hearts feel, we must get “in the trenches” and allow ourselves to be vulnerable and exposed.

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We quit.

We give up on the good fight because it’s hard and long with no guarantee of success.  Looking around the crowd, we see no other participants taking up where we leave off and our efforts, although honorable, become too much to bear alone.  Walking away is simple and we can wash our hands of any more responsibility and there is always the token, “I did what I could…it just didn’t work out” answer.  Out of strength and tired, we believe we cannot find a single ounce to take another step.

We forgot our “why.”

Most of us will not commit to something unless we believe we will be successful.  There has to be a chance of accomplishing what we want to achieve.  Our reasons for being pulled in a particular direction can lose its power if we wind up on a road we never intended to take, dealing more than we imagined, or never seem to be making any head way.  Our draw towards a specific goal has lost its meaning and we forget our reasons for beginning in the first place.  Lost momentum and faded eagerness begin to take hold — whether intended or not — and our focus seems unclear.

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No matter our background, our education level, or our when we get started, holding ourselves back is a disservice to the rest of the world.  Our natural-born talents go untapped, un-shared, and hidden.  No one assigns our limits to us, we assign them to ourselves.  And in doing so, we can also unassign them.  Doing something out of the norm and unorthodox might upset the apple cart and many people will not understand your motives, believing that they are built on false pretenses.  True limits continue to grow after they have been met…as long as we don’t hold ourselves back from reaching our full potential.

Featured photo credit: Kaley Dykstra via images.unsplash.com

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Michelle A. Homme

Author, Speaker, Quote Writer, Empowerment Coach

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Last Updated on December 9, 2019

5 Simple Ways to Relieve Stress Effectively

5 Simple Ways to Relieve Stress Effectively

Everyone experiences mental stress at one time or another. Maybe you’re starting a new career, job, or business, or you feel incredibly overwhelmed between work, parenting, and your love life (or a lack of it). It could even be that you simply feel that you have way too much to do and not enough time to do it,  plus, on top of everything, nothing seems to be going the way it should!

Yup, we all experience mental stress from time-to-time, and that’s okay as long as you have the tools, techniques and knowledge that allow you to fully relieve it once it comes.

Here are 5 tips for relieving mental stress when it comes so you can function at your best while feeling good (and doing well) in work, love, or life:

1. Get Rationally Optimistic

Mental stress starts with your perception of your experiences. For instance, most people get stressed out when they perceive their reality as “being wrong” in some way. Essentially, they have a set idea of how things “should be” at any given moment, and when reality ends up being different (not even necessarily bad), they get stressed.

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This process is simply a result of perception and can be easily “fixed” by recognizing that although life might not always be going as YOU think it should, it’s still going as it should—for your own benefit.

In fact, once you fully recognize that everything in your life ultimately happens for your own growth, progress, and development—so you can achieve your goals and dreams—your perception works in your favor. You soon process and respond to your experience of life differently, for your advantage. That’s the essence of becoming “rationally optimistic.”

The result: no more mental stress.

2. Unplug

Just like you might need to unplug your computer when it starts acting all crazy, you should also “unplug” your mind.

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How on earth do you unplug your mind? Simple: just meditate.

It isn’t nearly difficult or complicated as some people think, so, if you don’t already meditate, give it a try. Whether you meditate for 5 minutes, 30 minutes, or 2 hours, this is a surefire way to reduce mental stress.

Meditation has been scientifically proven to relax your body (resulting in less mental stress), while also reducing anxiety and high blood pressure.

3. Easy on the Caffeine

Yes, we know, we know—everyone loves a nice java buzz, and that’s okay, but there’s a fine line between a small caffeine pick-me-up and a racing heart and mind that throws you into a frenzy of mental stress.

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Try giving up caffeine for a while and see how you feel. And, if that’s completely out of the question for you, at least try to minimize it. You might find that lots of your mental stress mysteriously “disappears” as your caffeine intake goes down.

4. Attack Mental Stress Via the Back Door

That’s right: your body and mind are part of the whole being, and are constantly influencing and affecting each other. If you’re experiencing a lot of mental stress, try to reduce it by calming your body down—a calm body equals a calmer mind.

How do you calm your body down and reduce physical stress? A  great way to reduce physical stress (thereby reducing mental stress) is to take natural supplements that are proven to reduce stress and anxiety while lifting your mood. Three good ones to look into are kava-kava, St John’s wort, and rhodiola rosea:

  • Kava-kava is a natural plant known to have mild sedative properties, and you should be able to find it at your natural health food store or vitamin store. It’s available in capsules or liquid extract form.
  • St John’s wort is a natural flower used to treat depression. Again, it’s found at your local health store in capsules or liquid. Because it uplifts mood (enabling you to see the brighter side of all experiences) it helps relieve mental stress as well.
  • Rhodiola rosea is a natural plant shown to reduce stress and uplift mood, and Russian athletes have been using it forever. Like the other two supplements mentioned, rhodiola rosea can be found at your natural health store in capsule or liquid form.

While these supplements are all natural and can be very helpful for most people, always check with your health care provider first as they can cause side-effects depending on your current health situation etc.

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5. Good Old-Fashioned Exercise

This tip has been around forever because it works. Nothing relieves mental stress like running, kickboxing—you name it. Anything super-physical will wipe out most of your mental stresses once the exercise endorphins (happy chemicals) are released into your brain.

The result: mental stress will be gone!

So, if you’re feeling overwhelmed or just plain stressed, try using some of the above tips. You can even print this out or save it to refer to regularly.

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Featured photo credit: Radu Florin via unsplash.com

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