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3 Important Thoughts To Keep You Motivated Throughout Your Life

3 Important Thoughts To Keep You Motivated Throughout Your Life

A motivated mindset is the key to success in any endeavor. Show me two people competing over anything and I will show you the one who is motivated and fueled by their thoughts will often be the winner. If you want to win and be successful at anything in life, you must recognize the importance of positive internal dialogue and motivation. Many people are not able to do this and as a result, they often feel lost in life. Staying hungry for success on a consistent basis can be a challenge.

I have found myself in a similar situation many times and motivation is what enabled me to push through. Here are 3 important thoughts that will help motivate you throughout your life:

1. “I can do this.”

What is “this”? It can be a goal. It can be a task. The point is “this” is anything you are trying to succeed at. Why is it important to have this thought? It is important because you need positive internal dialogue every step along the way toward reaching your goal.

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You must think to yourself “I can do this” before you even start. This is what gives you confidence in the first place. You are telling yourself that success is possible and you can make it happen. You must tell yourself “I can do this” during the process. This is important because we often experience mental and physical fatigue. We might have nothing left. However, telling ourselves that we “can do this” pushes us to keep going. Eventually, the goal is accomplished and we no longer think “I can do this”. Instead, we think “I did it.”

This thought applies to any goal, especially losing weight. The way you succeed is by telling yourself, “I can do this”. You say this to yourself before you go to the gym early in the morning to do your cardio. During the process, you might be tempted to eat junk food and give up. However, thinking “I can do this” pushes you forward and keeps you on task. Eventually, you lose enough weight to meet your goal. You no longer think “I can do this.” Instead, you think “I did it.”

It is very easy to adopt this line of thought. All you have to do is give yourself permission to believe that you can do it. Once you do that, you don’t stop having this internal dialogue with yourself until your goal is accomplished.

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2. “No one will outwork me.”

Work ethic is what often separates the winners from the losers. Having pride in your work ethic is an incredible source of lifelong motivation. When you think “no one will outwork me”, you are making a special promise to yourself. You are promising yourself that you will give it your all in order to accomplish your goal. You will have no choice but to stay motivated. This thought is applicable whether you have competitors or not.

This applies to any arena when are competing against others because you are telling yourself that you are going to beat them during the training process. When it comes time for actual competition, you will have all the confidence in the world because you know you have outworked them.

This thought also applies when you have no competition. The “no one will outwork me” promise forces you to follow it long-term. Maybe you have competition out there that you do not know about? Maybe there is someone out there working just as hard as you? How do you deal with that? You deal with it by not leaving anything to chance. You repeatedly think to yourself “no one will outwork me” and you put in the work.

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“No one will outwork me” is important because it is promise that you make to yourself. Once you make it, you can apply it to any goal you have in life. You express it by putting your heart and soul in to your work.

3. “Have faith in the future.”

Life is not a simply a matter of having goals, fueling yourself with motivating thoughts, and accomplishing them. You are tested. There are obstacles along the way. There are times when you will doubt yourself because things don’t look too good. What do you do then?

You think to yourself “have faith in the future.” “Have faith in the future” is the ultimate motivating thought. It is important because there are times when we experience serious self-doubt. We lose all confidence and just want to give up.

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Having faith in the future is important because it is a way of telling yourself that although the situation looks grim, it will get better. You just have to have faith and work through it. Ultimately, “have faith in the future” is a thought that keeps you on task and reminds you of what’s really important, which is to accomplish your goal. Adversity and distractions are inevitable. However, in the end, the only thing that truly matters is accomplishing your goal.

For instance, medical school is a time when many students could use this thought. Do students experience adversity and self-doubt during medical school? Absolutely. The process of learning difficult material and supporting yourself financially can be a daunting task. Many students contemplate giving up. The ones that push through are the ones who are constantly reminding themselves that times will get better and that they must “have faith in the future.”

This thought comes in handy when times are tough. You can remind yourself to “have faith in the future” throughout the entire process. However, it is most useful when you are experiencing self-doubt. At that point, it is crucial to constantly remind yourself of this so that you don’t give up. As long as you have that faith, there is always a chance.

Featured photo credit: Eric Austria via flickr.com

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

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