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What You Should Really Do When You’re Feeling Upset

What You Should Really Do When You’re Feeling Upset

I bet you know at least one person who somehow always has everything under control – you never see them sad, anxious, or furious. So, how do they do it? Having everything handled at all times practically implies having a superpower to us mortals, doesn’t it?

Well, considering the fact that calm people are only human, we can come to the conclusion that this is something we need to work on and develop step by step.

You probably aren’t even aware of how damaging anger is for you. Recently, I came to realize that I spend way too much time trying to deal with anger issues and that my methods are simply wrong. It’s not about never getting upset – it’s about learning how to cope with things and not letting your anger take over.

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Don’t Keep It In

Most people are too polite to react to a certain situation that causes them to feel upset, or on the other hand, they overreact. It’s very important not to keep your frustrations bottled in, no matter which area of your life they are related to. By staying silent and doing nothing about it, you’ll only allow stress to build up and eat you up from the inside. Besides, your problems aren’t going to solve themselves, are they?

Write, Paint, and Play

02 Write, Paint & Play

    If you’re artistic, this should be the first thing to turn to. Having a talent isn’t something that should be ignored, especially if it can help you deal with your issues. On the other hand, signing up for an art class of any sort will allow you to focus that negative energy into something creative. This is a great way to change the way you deal with your emotions. The third, and equally creative, option is to start a DIY project — if you want to change something about yourself, this decision should reflect in your surroundings as well.

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    Music, Books, and Movies

    When you’re stressed out, visiting your comfort zone isn’t a bad idea. There’s nothing more effective when it comes to dealing with your blue emotions than watching your favorite movie, spending an afternoon with your favorite book, or playing your favorite album and letting the memories it triggers wash over you. Spending a couple of days like this is absolutely acceptable, but try not to get dragged into it for too long.

    Take a Break

    04 Take a Break

      Maybe all you need is a small break. Every now and then you need to give yourself the privilege to do nothing for an entire day. This should be the time to allow others to take care of you, not the other way around. Having a spa day is something that always works for me — it’s extremely beneficial for both your mind and body. Besides, everyone deserves some pampering from time to time.

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      Talk It Out

      Once you’re a bit calmer, and that initial emotional flood has subsided, it’s much easier to figure out the right course of action, but you need to verbalize your thoughts. Having a friend over, talking to a family member, or making an appointment with your therapist will be more than helpful when it comes to figuring things out. A healthy decision requires at least a couple of different points of view, and you shouldn’t hesitate from asking for help.

      Make Yourself Useful

      06 Useful

        When something hits you right on the nerve, you need to allow your mind to work it out. Trying to calm yourself by force won’t get you anywhere. So, you need to give enough space for your brain to cool off and you need to keep your hands busy. Therefore, after a few deep slow breaths, you need to roll up your sleeves and start cleaning or organizing — anything that will make you feel useful and productive. This isn’t a random suggestion — actions like this help your brain work out various issues much faster.

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        Don’t Repeat Your Mistakes

        As I already mentioned, you can’t expect that repeating one thing can possibly result differently. There’s nothing wrong in making a mistake, but repeating that same mistake over and over again can only make you feel more and more upset. There’s a clear path here — when you make a mistake, you should determine what went wrong, remember it, and try really hard not to repeat it. You should look at this procedure as if it were an investment into your mental health and your future happiness.

        Finally, deciding that you want to become a calm person, who manages all tasks and issues by searching for a reasonable solution, is a healthy resolution, but you can’t expect all of this to happen overnight. Give your mind enough time to take it all in, apply one method at a time and you’ll be more than just fine — you’ll be happy.

        Featured photo credit: Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

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        Last Updated on October 5, 2020

        How to Quit Your Boring Life and Start Living an Interesting One

        How to Quit Your Boring Life and Start Living an Interesting One

        We are given life with many opportunities to make it everything we want it to be and more. If you find that you’ve slipped into living a boring life, it’s time to take a hard look at what you’ve been doing and what you can start doing now to make it more interesting.

        Maybe you’ve been doing the same thing and living the same life for too long, or maybe your daily routine is limiting your growth and happiness. Whatever your reason is, the following list can definitely make any day or life more interesting. Some of them are silly, while some are more meaningful, so hopefully just reading the list makes your life less boring and sparks your creativity.

        Let’s dive in the list to quit your boring life and start living an interesting (and meaningful) one!

        1. Channel Your 7-Year-Old Self

        Imagine being a young child. Life was never boring, was it? That’s because children harness every ounce of creativity they have in order to try new things.

        What would your 7-year-old self want to do in this moment? Maybe they’d pick up a paintbrush and try to paint the landscape around them. May they would go outside and build something with random materials around the yard. Maybe they would raid the fridge and put together a dish they’ve never seen before.

        Just because you’re a grown-up doesn’t mean any of this stuff will be less enjoyable than you remember it. Give yourself permission to play and use your creativity to its fullest.

        2. Go Play With Kids

        Speaking of little kids, if you have your own (or a niece or nephew), go play with them!

        Kids are absolutely hilarious, so it’s simply impossible to be bored when you’re around them. They also keep things so simple, and we can really stand to be reminded of this and stop allowing ourselves to get bogged down in boring details.

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        3. Play Cell Phone Roulette

        You’ll need at least one buddy for this, but this is a great way to avoid a boring life. Scroll through the contacts in your phone, stop on a random one, and (if it feels right) call the person.

        You could spark an incredible catch-up session or, at the very least, remind someone that you’re thinking of them. Neither are boring.

        4. Fill out a Pack of Thank-You Cards

        This is a great part of a gratitude practice. We often forget to thank the people who do things for us, especially if we have come to expect those things. For example, have you ever thought about thanking your mom for that weekly phone call? Or thanking your sister for always sending you a homemade gift on your birthday?

        Take time to think of at least 5 people you would like to say thank you to and write out a card. You could even write them out for random people in your neighborhood, like the local librarian, a teacher at your child’s school, or the accountant at your bank.

        Anyone and everyone appreciates being thanked for their efforts.

        5. Sign up for a Class

        Nowadays, there are classes for everything. To make it as interesting as possible, try finding one that you wouldn’t normally consider doing, like salsa lessons, improv, or boxing.

        Otherwise, try to find a course on something you’ve always wanted to learn, like pottery, photography, or a foreign language course.

        What’s good about joining an interest class is that you will also meet new people, which will add even more interest to your life!

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        6. Talk to Your Grandparents About Their Lives

        We often underestimate how interesting the elderly are. You can rest assured that any elderly person you talk to will not have had a boring life! Take some time to talk to them and hear their interesting stories. You may even find that this motivates you to go out and find your own interesting experiences.

        7. Get up on Stage at an Open Mic Night

        Whether you’re funny or not, get up on stage. If you’re not into comedy, find an open mic that focuses on reading poetry or short stories and bring your own. These groups tend to be incredibly supportive for anyone who is willing to be brave enough to get up and try.

        8. Do Something for Someone Else

        Showing kindness automatically makes you feel good, but doing these small acts will also help to ensure that you don’t have a boring life. Try doing one or two things each week that are outside your normal routine.

        For example, you could make a batch of cookies for the mailperson or help your elderly neighbor organize one of their rooms. There are a million ways to show kindness to those around you. Tap into your creativity and find your own or use some of the ideas from the image below[1].

        Do random acts of kindness to avoid living a boring life.

          9. Start a DIY Project in Your Home

          If you have your own place, there is always a project that needs to get done. Many people simply pay for someone else to do it in order to avoid the hassle, but taking on a DIY project can make a boring life much more interesting.

          It doesn’t have to be super complicated. Maybe you repaint an old vase or build a spice shelf out of used pallets.

          If you need ideas, you can also check out these 30 Awesome DIY Projects that You’ve Never Heard of.

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          10. Plan a Weekend Trip or an All-Out Vacation

          This will give you something to look forward to. One study actually found that most travelers are happiest before a vacation[2]. Therefore, simply planning a trip will boost your mood, even if you can’t actually take the vacation right now.

          Even if you don’t have the time or money to go on a vacation, plan for a staycation, which is also fun and relaxing!

          11. Go People Watching

          Find a bench in a crowded area (centers of transportation like airports, bus stops, and train stations are great for this!) and just observe[3].

          People are infinitely interesting. Try to imagine what their lives are like, what they’re thinking, or where they’re going. You’ll never know if you’re right, but it will give you something to focus on and also help you practice empathy.

          12. Eat Something You’ve Never Eaten Before

          You can try that new Moroccan restaurant down the street and pick the most interesting dish on the menu. Or, you can raid your own fridge and throw together a dish you’ve never made before.

          If you’re up for a trip to the grocery store, try picking up a new fruit or veggie from the produce section. You may find a new food that you love!

          13. Dance

          You can get your friends together for a night on the town or just pull up a video on YouTube and bust a move from your own living room.

          If you’re feeling extra brave, you can even dance in public or join a flash mob.

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          14. Pick up a Book and Start Reading

          Reading a good book can keep you occupied for hours. It will also transport you to a life that isn’t your own, and one that likely will be the opposite of a boring life. You’ll be amazed by what you can learn from those pages.

          Pick on of these inspirational books to start reading: 10 Best Inspirational Books That Can Change Your Life

          15. Spend Some Time With People You Care About

          Facebook stalking doesn’t count as real social interaction. Call up a friend you haven’t seen in a while, or bring a coffee over to your parent’s place and catch up. They’ll appreciate the gesture, and you’ll avoid boredom.

          16. Check out a Museum You’ve Never Been to

          Some people are bored by museums, so if that’s you, skip to the next one. However, if you love art, history, or culture, this one is for you!

          17. Write a List of Things You Desire and Truly Want

          This is a great way to help you figure out the real reason why you’re feeling bored about your life. Maybe you haven’t really done things that you truly enjoy? Maybe what you’ve wanted to do all the time has been left behind?

          Think about the list of things you really want to do, and ask yourself why you aren’t doing these things (yet). Then, start taking your first step to make it happen.

          Now, go make your life interesting and live your dream life!

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          Featured photo credit: Alex Alvarez via unsplash.com

          Reference

          [1] FECAVA: Random Acts of Kindness
          [2] Applied Research in Quality of Life: Vacationers Happier, but Most not Happier After a Holiday
          [3] Psychology Today: The Expert’s Guide to People Watching

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