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Last Updated on January 6, 2020

20 Simple Things You Can Do Daily To Become a Mindful Person

20 Simple Things You Can Do Daily To Become a Mindful Person

The world we are living in today has taken away our ability to truly appreciate the little things that we should be thankful for. Mindfulness helps us see the little things that we have unconsciously neglected due to the hectic daily routines and busy schedule in our lives. Being mindful not only helps us become a calmer individual, but also saves us from a lot of trouble. It helps us be more productive without making the unnecessary errors. Often, we make bad decisions or mistakes because we weren’t mindful enough to notice the subtle things that are happening around us. However, if we practice mindfulness, we will gradually become more aware of the things that are happening around us. We also better understand our own emotions and our physical state, which lead us to a healthier and happier life.

Here are 20 simple things you can do every day to become a more mindful person:

1. Observe your breathing.

Take a few second of your day to observe your breathing. Take a longer inhale than you usually do, and then take a longer exhale than you usually do. We often act based on our emotions, where it gets us into unwanted outcome. This practice will help you to calm yourself down during those situations, while observing your physical and emotional state.

2. Look at yourself in the mirror.

Looking yourself in the mirror helps you observe your own facial expression. You can see how you look when you smile or when you frown, even when you are feeling angry. This will help you better adjust to your reaction towards others when you are dealing with them.

3. Savor every bite while you eat.

Focus on chewing while eating. Put your devices aside, and turn off the television. Enjoy every bite of your meal. This will not only help with your digestive system, but also help you practice focusing on your current action and appreciating the food you are eating.

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4. Listen to soothing music.

Turn on relaxing and soothing melody and really listen to it. Lay down or sit in the most comfortable position, close your eyes and feel the music in your soul. Soothing melody will help you clear your mind and thoughts after a busy or stressful day.

5. Read a book.

Reading takes a lot of your focus. Reading not only gives you useful knowledge, but also helps you form a focused meditation. While you are going through every word, you are practicing mindfulness at the same time.

6. Go for a walk.

Our legs are our unsung heroes that take us to and fro, day in and day out, throughout our lives. Going for a walk gives you the opportunity to show gratitude to your legs as well as your entire body, while appreciating the things around you. You also get a clearer mind after a good long walk.

7. Organize something at work or home.

Having your home or workplace in disarray can cause anxiety and stress. Getting organized is a simple way to reduce your stress and improve the quality of your life. While you are picking up bits and pieces of objects during the process, you are also practicing mindfulness when you consciously observe each placement of the object while organizing them.

8. Write a journal.

Research shows that people who practice writing in a journal reap physical and emotional benefits. They also raise their potential to increase their longevity. Sharing your thoughts in your journal helps you reduce the amount of worry and depressive symptoms. You clarify your thoughts and emotions when you express them in writing, and that helps you better understand yourself at a deeper level.

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9. Cook yourself a meal.

The aromatic scents of cooking have beneficial effects to your mood. The process of cooking, like chopping vegetables; for example, can actually take the edge off a stressful day. Cooking gives you a sense of calmness while also providing an important health measure.

10. Set small daily goals.

Breaking down your goals into smaller ones helps you be more specific to what you aim to achieve on a daily basis. It can be as simple as taking your dog for a walk or cleaning up your house. Take the time to acknowledge yourself for each goal that has been accomplished, and for doing something meaningful for yourself.

11. Observe the people around you.

Taking the time to observe the people around you helps you notice things that seemed oblivious before. You get an idea of the variety of perspectives, raising your awareness by releasing the norms and values from different people. This also gives you an eye-opening experience, helping you better learn the quality of mindfulness.

12. Help someone.

Research suggests that human beings who live for others lead incredibly successful lives, and show lower rates of depression and stress. A simple gesture like helping your family with chores or helping an elderly cross the road can do wonders. By doing someone a small favor, you increase positive feelings toward yourself while making their life a little better. This gives you a mindful awareness of a purposeful life.

13. Let loose and laugh.

Laughing releases endorphins and brings more oxygen and energy into your body while also improving your immune system. Some of us may need the assistance of entertainment to laugh, but really you can find humor in every little thing in life. Just try laughing for the sake of laughing and you will realize that you are actually very present during the process. Being present is the key to mindfulness.

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14. Create art.

Engaging in creative work helps you get into a flow state of heightened awareness and consciousness. Creative activities like baking, doodling, or singing help you quiet down your mind and help you focus on the moment, thus improving your practice of mindfulness.

15. Turn off your devices.

Every once in a while, turn off your devices and engage with the natural world around you. Have a proper conversation with the people around you. This helps you put yourself under the right condition while you freshen up before proceeding with the endless task on your to-do list. You will find yourself much more productive after the simple break and refreshing yourself with this tip.

16. Meditate.

Enjoy the silence after the endless distraction from the people and things around you. Take the time to put down all the things that you are working on, sit down in a comfortable position, and observe your entire body. Focus on feeling each part of your body functioning while clearing away the stress that you obtain throughout the day.

17. Exercise.

When you exercise, you focus your attention on your sensations, breathing, and the movements of your body. This helps you let go of distractions and your endless thoughts while developing a healthy loving relationship with your body. You learn to listen to the needs of your body and to focus on current events.

18. Write sticky notes.

Jotting down your thoughts in a few words is an incredible way to train mindfulness. Simply write down things that you want to remind yourself to remember and stick them around your house or your desk at work. You can jot down “smile” or “be mindful” to remind yourself to do the simple gesture you normally get distracted from.

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19. Take a long bath.

A soothing hot bath relaxes your tired muscles and provides you with a relaxing atmosphere, allowing you the temporary feeling of escape from your daily activities. It helps your breathing become slower and deeper, allowing you to stay in the present moment.

20. Give a genuine compliment.

Give someone you know a genuine compliment at lease once a day, and be specific with it. For example, you could tell them something like, “I appreciate the way you smiled generously at that stranger earlier today”. This practice of noticing what people around you do well and giving genuine compliments adds new warmth, intimacy, and responsiveness to your relationship with them. It helps you realize the beauty of the people you love. You show  them appreciation when you take the time to truly observe them mindfully.

Featured photo credit: Aperture Vintage via unsplash.com

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Crystie Lim

Life Coach

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Last Updated on March 30, 2020

What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

Have you ever walked into a room and felt like your nerves simply couldn’t handle it? Your heart beats fast, you start to sweat, and you feel like all eyes are on you (even if they’re really not). This is just one of the many ways that being self-conscious can rear its ugly head.

You may not even realize you’re self-conscious, and you may be wondering, “What does self-conscious mean?” That’s a good place to start.

This article will define self-consciousness, show how practically everyone has faced it at one point or another, and give you tips to avoid it.

What Does Self-Conscious Mean?

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, self-conscious is defined as “conscious of one’s own acts or states as belonging to or originating in oneself.”[1]

Not so bad, right? There’s another definition, though — one that speaks more to what you’re going through: “feeling uncomfortably conscious of oneself as an object of the observation of others.” For those of us who regularly deal with extreme self-consciousness, that second definition sounds about right.

There are many different ways self-consciousness can spring up. You may feel self-conscious around people you know, like your family members or closest friends. You may feel self-conscious at work, even though you spend hours every week around your co-workers. Or you may feel self-conscious when out in public and surrounded by strangers. However, you probably don’t feel self-conscious when you’re home alone.

How to Stop Being Too Self-Conscious

When you’re in the throes of self-consciousness, it’s nearly impossible to remember how to stop feeling that way. That’s why it’s so important to prepare ahead of time, when you’re feeling ready to tackle the problem instead of succumbing to it.

Here are a variety of ways to feel better about yourself and stop thinking about how others see you.

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1. Ask Yourself, “So What?”

One way to banish negative, self-conscious thoughts is to do just that: banish them.

The next time you walk into a room and feel your face getting red, think to yourself, “So what?” How much does it really matter if people don’t like how you look or act? What’s the worst that could happen?

Most of the time, you’ll find that you don’t have a good answer to this question. Then, you can immediately start assigning such thoughts less importance. With self-awareness, you can acknowledge that your negative thoughts are present and realize that you don’t agree with them.[2] They’re just thoughts, after all.

2. Be Honest

A lie that self-consciousness might tell is that there’s one way to act or feel. Honestly, though, everyone else is just figuring life out as well. There isn’t a preferred way to show up to an event, gathering, or public place. What you can do is be honest with your feelings and thoughts.[3]

If you feel offended by something someone says, you don’t have to smile to be polite or laugh to fit in with the crowd. Instead, you can politely say why you disagree or excuse yourself and find a group of people who you relate to better. If you’re nervous, don’t overcompensate by trying to look relaxed and casual — it’ll be obvious you’re putting on a front. Instead, nothing is more endearing than saying, “I’m a little nervous!” to a room of people who probably feel the exact same way.

On the same note, if you don’t understand why someone wants you to do something, question it. You can do this at work, at home, or even with people you don’t know well. Nobody should force you to do something you don’t want to do.

Also, even if you’re willing to do what’s asked of you, there’s nothing wrong with asking for more clarification. People will realize that you’re not a person to be bossed around.

3. Understand Why You’re Struggling at Work

Being self-conscious at work can get in the way of your daily responsibilities, your relationships with co-workers, and even your career as a whole. If you’re facing some sort of conflict but you’re too nervous to speak up, you may be at the whim of what happens to you instead of taking some control.

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If you’re usually confident at work, you may be wondering where this new self-consciousness is coming from. It’s possible that you’re dealing with burnout.[4] Common signs are anxiety, fatigue and distraction, all of which can leave you feeling under-confident.

4. Succeed at Something

When you create success in your life, it’s easier to feel confident[5] and less self-conscious. If you feel self-conscious at work, finish the project that’s been looming over your head. If you feel self-conscious in the gym, complete an advanced workout class.

Exposing yourself to what you’re scared of and then succeeding at it in some way (even just by finishing it) can do wonders for your self-esteem. The more confidence you build, the more likely you are to have more success in the future, which will create a cycle of confidence-building.

5. Treat All of You — Not Just Your Self-Consciousness

Trying to solve your self-consciousness alone may not treat the root of the problem. Instead, take a well-rounded approach to lower your self-consciousness and build confidence in areas where you may struggle.

Even professional counselors are embracing this holistic type of treatment[6] because they feel that the health of the mind and body are inextricably linked. This approach combines physical, spiritual, and psychological components. Common activities and treatments include meditation, yoga, massage, and healthy changes to diet and exercise.

If much of this is new to you, it will pay to give it a try. You never know how it will impact you.

If you’re feeling self-conscious about how your body looks, a massage that makes you feel great could boost your confidence. If you try a new workout, you could have something exciting to talk about the next time you’re in a group setting.

Putting yourself in a new situation and learning that you can get through it with grace can give you the confidence to get through all sorts of events and nerve-wracking moments.

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6. Make the Changes That Are Within Your Control

Let’s say you walk into a room and you’re self-conscious about how you look. However, you may have put a lot of time and effort into your outfit. Even though it may stand out, this is how you have chosen to express yourself.

You have to work on your internal confidence, not your external appearance. There’s nothing to change other than your outlook.

On the other hand, maybe there’s something that you don’t like about yourself that you can change. For example, maybe you hate how a birthmark on your face looks or have varicose veins that you think are unsightly. If you can do something about these things, do it! There’s nothing wrong with changing your appearance (or skills, education, etc.) if it’s going to make you more confident.

You don’t have to accept your current situation for acceptance’s sake. There’s no award for putting up with something you hate. Confidence is also required to make changes that are scary, even if they’re for the better. Plus, it may be an easier fix than you thought. For example, treating varicose veins doesn’t have to involve surgery — sometimes simple compression stockings will take care of the problem.[7]

7. Realize That Everyone Has Awkward Moments

Everyone has said something awkward to someone else and lived to tell the tale. We’ve all forgotten somebody’s name or said, “You too!” when the concession stand girl says to enjoy our movie. Not only are these things uber-common, but they’re not nearly as embarrassing as you feel they are.

Think about how you react when someone else does something awkward. Do you think, “Wow, that person’s such a loser!” or do you think, “What a relief, I’m not the only one who does that.” Chances are good that’s the same reaction others have to you when you stumble.

Remember, self-consciousness is a state of mind that you have control over. You don’t have to feel this way. Do what you need to in order to build your confidence, put your self-consciousness in perspective, and start exercising your “I feel awesome about myself” muscle. It’ll get easier with time.

When Is Being Self-Conscious a Good Thing?

Self-consciousness can sometimes be a good thing[8], but you have to take the awkwardness and nerves out of it.

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In this case, “self-aware” is a much better term. Knowing how you come off to people is an excellent trait; you’ll be able to read a room and understand how what you do and say affects others. These are fantastic skills for people work and personal relationships.

Self-awareness helps you dress appropriately for the occasion, tells you that you’re talking too loud or not loud enough, and guides a conversation so you don’t offend or bore anyone.

It’s not about being someone you’re not — that can actually have adverse effects, just like self-consciousness. Instead, it’s about turning up certain aspects of yourself to perform well in the situation.

Final Thoughts

When you’re self-conscious, you’re constantly battling with yourself in an effort to control how other people view you. You try to change yourself to suit what you think other people want to see.

The truth, though, is that you can’t actually control how other people view you — and you may not even be correct about how they view you in the first place.

Being confident doesn’t happen overnight. Instead, it happens in small steps as you slowly build your confidence and say “no” to your self-consciousness. It also requires accepting that you’re going to feel self-conscious sometimes, and that’s okay.

Sometimes worrying that there is a problem can be more stressful than the problem itself. Feeling bad for feeling self-conscious can be more troublesome than simply feeling it and getting on with the day.

Forgive yourself for being human and make the small changes that will lead to better confidence in the future.

More Tips for Improving Your Self-Esteem

Featured photo credit: Cata via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Merriam-Webster: Self-conscious
[2] Bustle: 7 Tips On How To Stop Feeling Self-Conscious
[3] Marc and Angel: 10 Things to Remember When You Feel Unsure of Yourself
[4] Bostitch: How to Protect Small Businesses From Burnout
[5] Psychology Today: Self-conscious? Get Over It
[6] Wake Forest University: Embracing Holistic Medicine
[7] Center for Vein Restoration: What Causes Venous Ulcers, and How Are They Treated?
[8] Scientific American: The Pros and Cons of Being Self-Aware

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