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The One Question Steve Jobs Asked Himself Every Day

The One Question Steve Jobs Asked Himself Every Day

Steve Jobs, whom most of us know for his work at the helm of Apple, looked in the mirror every day of his working life and asked himself one question: “If today were the last day of your life, would you want to be doing what you’re doing?” Most of the time, his answer came back as a resounding yes, but for the average person, it probably varies. So passionate about his work was Jobs that he worked right up until the day before his death, despite suffering from pancreatic cancer.

Minda Zetlin discusses the benefits of asking ourselves this question each day in terms of how it can help us to discover whether or not we’re fulfilling our full potential and working in the careers we love. Asking this question can help us to cultivate a sense of purpose in our personal lives as well as our professional lives. Here are 6 questions that Steve Jobs’s daily exercise can challenge us to ask ourselves.

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1. Does your work make you smile?

No job is perfect. We all have to deal with the demands of schedules, cranky coworkers, long hours, and mind-numbing tasks. But I’ve come to realize that at the end of the day, if I’ve smiled just once as a result of my work, it’s all been worth it. Smiling at work reminds you that you’re doing something, however small, in your daily routine that you find fulfilling.

2. How tired do you feel at the end of the day?

There seem to be two kinds of exhaustion: the well-earned readiness for rest after a challenging but productive day, and the weariness of feeling like you’ve climbed a mountain only to find yourself at the bottom having to face the same drudgery tomorrow. If you’re living according to the philosophy of Steve Jobs, you should, at least most days, experience the first rather than the second form of exhaustion. Going to bed with the feeling that you’ve accomplished something means two things: that you’re using your talents in a way that you find fulfilling and that you’re contributing productively to the world around you.

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3. Is your work rewarded?

I’m not talking about formal recognition, though being named employee of the month certainly doesn’t harm your professional credentials. Rather, do people appreciate the work that you do? Do colleagues thank you for your work, compliment your dedication, and tell you how well you do your job at least occasionally? Mental and physical health are intertwined, and the emotions, both negative and positive, that we carry around with us in the workplace often follow us home. Working in an environment where you feel valued not only contributes to your professional success, but helps you to avoid bringing bad vibes into your home and squandering your “downtime” with thoughts about overwork or office politics.

4. Do you have any regrets?

Other than the triple latte you probably shouldn’t have ordered on the way to work because it went completely off your diet, what do you regret about the way you’re living your life? When we’re unhappy, we tend to focus on what we could be doing rather than what we’re doing in the moment. Minda Zetlin points out that some of the biggest regrets we have are due to a fear of failure. Changing careers, pursuing more education, or learning a new skill can come with risks. Sometimes you’ll succeed, sometimes you won’t, but it’s far better to try and fail than to spend your life wondering whether or not you would have succeeded.

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5. Does your work consume your life?

It’s commonly said that no one ever dies wishing they’d worked more. Not all jobs allow you to leave your work on the desk at 5 o’clock, particularly in the digital age, but that doesn’t mean your work has to control your life. Set boundaries when and where you can. Sit down to dinner with your family when time permits. Squander a few minutes of reading the latest novel on your morning commute or on the treadmill. Find ways to fill your life with variety to give yourself a reason to face each day with something to get excited about.

6. Do you feel stimulated?

One of the things I love about my work as a teacher and a writer is that I’m always learning something, whether through research or a conversation with my students that challenges me to examine the world from a different angle. Meeting with challenges or learning new things in your work keeps your mind active and broadens your knowledge and skill set, but it can also help to spice up the monotony of the everyday routine. Whether you’re a housewife or a hedge-fund manager, having mentally or physically stimulating work to do can increase your sense of productivity and self-esteem. Nothing compares with the satisfaction of setting yourself a task and completing it.

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Featured photo credit: Stokpic via stokpic.com

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Last Updated on September 17, 2018

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.

Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.

When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).

Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:

1. You’re depressed about your home life.

No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.

However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.

If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.

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When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.

You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.

2. You aren’t comfortable being yourself.

Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.

If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.

You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.

If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.

3. You can’t stop snooping.

Mutual trust is necessary in any relationship. The only way to get that trust is with respect.

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I can find you anywhere online, no matter how private and secure you think you are. The odds of you having a password I can’t crack are slim. If we’ve met in person, I could install a remote key logger on your device without even touching it.

Finding your information online hardly takes a clandestine organization. Any idiot with a Wi-Fi-enabled device can cyberstalk you. I’m just the only idiot in the village admitting it.

So now that we know everyone snoops, it’s time to address your personal habits. Governments snoop because they don’t trust us. If you’re snooping on your partner, it’s because you don’t trust them.

It’s ok to have doubts, and it’s perfectly normal to look into anything that looks weird, but keep in mind that data collection is only half of an investigation.

If you find yourself constantly snooping and questioning everything, clearly there’s a trust issue and the relationship likely needs to end.

4. You’re afraid of commitment.

If you’ve been dating longer than a year and you aren’t engaged, it’s never going to happen.

Commitment is important. People will come up with a million ways to describe why they can’t be committed.

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No matter who you are if you like it, you need to put a ring on it. Find an engagement ring, stick a gemstone in it and marry the person. If you’re not legally able to get married or you don’t believe in it for one reason or another, have a child (or adopt one, however you’re able to) or treat your partner’s family like your own. It’s a huge financial and mental commitment.

If you’re not ready for one or the other after some time, don’t waste anymore of your precious life on the relationship.

Your relationship should be something that propels you forward. If it’s not going anywhere, make it an open relationship and call it what it is—dating multiple people.

5. You imagine a happier life without your partner.

If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.

Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.

Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.

Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.

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If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?

6. You resent, rather than love your partner.

When a relationship starts to crumble, you begin to resent your partner for all the things you once loved about him or her.

When you’ve reached this point, your partner has reached at least No. 2 on this list. From your partner’s perspective, your unhappiness with them is picked up as bashing them for being who they are.

If you’re both unhappy in the relationship, it’s better if it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.

7. You chase past feelings.

It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.

You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.

When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.

Final thoughts

If you’re feeling stuck in your current relationship, it’s time to reflect about it with your partner. Don’t ignore these signs of an unhappy relationship as they will slowly go worse and harm both you and your partner in long-term.

Featured photo credit: josh peterson via unsplash.com

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