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10 Ways to Get Over Ourselves

10 Ways to Get Over Ourselves

We take ourselves too seriously. We allow ourselves to get tied up in things that are insignificant in the grand scheme of things. A person cuts us off on the way to work, and it ruins our whole day or the stranger in front of us at the coffee shop grabs the last croissant and we curse them on the way out. We get upset with our partners for not taking out the trash, or let our lazy co-worker get under our skin. But remember, we can’t change anyone but ourselves. We can live a life where other people dictate our feelings, or we can be the ones in control. A person starts to live when they can live outside themselves. So here is a piece of humble pie, let’s eat it and get over ourselves.

1. We need to tell ourselves to get over ourselves.

We need to remind ourselves that it’s not about us. So I suggest you tell yourself, out loud and in the mirror, to get over yourself – over and over. Put a post-it note on your computer at work or leave a reminder on your phone. Just remember, it’s not about you. The more we can remember that, the easier life is.

2. We can think about the size of the Universe.

We are but a speck in the grand scale of space and time, but so often we think that we are larger than life. Think about how enormous the Universe is and the Universe of that Universe, and then think about where you are to put it all into perspective. So, so tiny.

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When they discover the centre of the Universe, a lot of people will be disappointed that they are not it. – Anonymous

Don’t be one of those people. Of course, life is challenging and sometimes our problems seem insurmountable, but with a little selfless thinking we can check ourselves at the door and approach those hurdles realistically.

3. We could make a farting noise with our mouth.

When we get so caught up in our own negativity, sometimes all it takes is just a small trigger to break our state. Try making a farting noise with your mouth the next time you get too much in your own head. The fact that you probably don’t want to do it is even more reason why you should, so you can get over yourself and out of your head.

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4. We really should just dance.

Dancing is good for the soul. The next time your mind starts to run wild, just stop, and dance. Just like number three, it’s about breaking your state of mind.

You’ve gotta dance like there’s nobody watching,
love like you’ll never be hurt,
sing like there’s nobody listening,
and live like it’s heaven on earth. – William W. Purkey

5. We need to allow ourselves to make mistakes.

We are only humans, and we will always make mistakes. By allowing ourselves to make mistakes and by knowing it’s inevitable, we’ll make it a lot easier on ourselves to do so. There is no failure, only succeeding and learning.

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6. What we focus on is what we get.

We are in control of what we focus on. When we all of a sudden see countless Volkswagons on the road, it’s not because there are so many, it’s because we just purchased one. When we focus on the good stuff, that’s what we’ll see. Perception is projection.

7. We should all just laugh, out loud.

It’s almost impossible to be in a bad mood when laughing. Fake it until you make it. Just turn that frown upside down and make it a happy face. Laughter and play is so important to our emotional well-being. Dr Stuart Brown, founder of the National Institute of Play compares play to oxygen and says,

It’s all around us, yet goes mostly unnoticed or unappreciated until it is missing.

8. We need to take deep breaths.

We often forget how grounding and calming our breath can be. When you feel flustered or upset, stop and take three long breaths, inhaling through your mouth and exhaling through the nose. On the last breath, let out a loud sigh to really seal the deal. Remember number four, and sigh like no one is listening.

To learn more about breathing and mindfulness, download this amazing free app that some awesome Australians created – Smiling Mind

9. We can tell someone we love them.

The Beatles said it best – Love is all you need. When we stop making it about us and tell someone we love them, it helps calm us down and get back in touch with what matters most. This crazy thing we call love. The faster we get over ourselves, the faster we can spread love with the world around us.

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10. We should remember that the way we perceive the world is not actually what is.

Our map is not the territory. How we perceive the world is not actually what is. Reminding ourselves that everyone has their own perception of reality gets us thinking more about where we’re coming from, as well as others.

Featured photo credit: Smile even if you don’t want to/Nan Palmero via flickr.com

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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