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20 Things Only People Who Are Truly In Love Understand

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20 Things Only People Who Are Truly In Love Understand

Love doesn’t pop out of a movie screen. It develops and starts from a sudden sparkle and could turn into an inferno. Here are some things you will understand if you are in love.

1. You have someone who you can spend quality time with

Time spent together is what builds a relationship and draws lovers together. You may have distractions in work and other commitments but someone who truly loves you will always be there for you.

2. You have someone who admires you regardless of your flaws

You can’t be perfect. But your lover cares and understands your limitations. And he is willing to stand by and offer you all the love you need.

3. You have someone who calls you all the time

You have someone who cares so much to call you and asks you about even something as insignificant as what you ate in the morning or what outfit you will be wearing out.

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4. You have someone you miss when they are gone

Somehow you are connected to him/her so much you want to have the person at your side all the time. You don’t want them to ever leave, and when they do it is like a part of you is gone.

5. Every kiss triggers something special

Kisses and holds are a display of affection. The thing about it is that you feel special and important when the other person does such things to you.

6. You daydream and fantasize a lot

It is not perfect and sometimes it is an illusion. But such fantasies however take you to some place exciting and marvelous as you think of how perfect things will be with your lover.

7. You have butterflies within when he/she is with you

You blush, you are nervous, you light up, you sparkle, and you are different and satisfied when he/she is with you. You have something that is mysterious and appealing takeover you when he comes around.

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8. You have someone to support you

Whether physically or emotionally you have someone to support you and make you not feel alone in this world. You can have his support even without asking for it.

9. You are included in their decisions

If your lover is traveling or making an important career decision, he/she has to find how you can fit in and be a part of it.

10. You have someone who respects your views

Your opinions or views are not belittled or thrown aside but respected by your lover. He/she truly cares about you and wants your decisions or beliefs to count.

11. He/she gives you that long romantic look

He/she can stare at you and give you that romantic look that makes you feel special and connected to them.

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12. You can have an idea of what the future will look like

You can imagine and know what could happen to you both if you stayed together. If you are going to have a baby together you can have a glimpse of what your kid will be like.

13. You have someone who can laugh at your jokes

It doesn’t matter whether your jokes are funny or not. But you have someone who will laugh with you at your jokes.

14. You find yourself jealous at times

You can’t help but try to know what is going on in his life. You will check and double check that there is no one else in his life but you.

15. You can’t imagine being in love with another person

It seems you are stuck with this person. You have found happiness and satisfaction. It will be difficult to have another person replace him/her or even try to come and take over his/her place in your heart.

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16. You now have special days

February 14th or his/her birthday cannot just be forgotten or put aside. You have special days that should be celebrated with him/her.

17. You want to know how they feel about you

You are not selfish but you really want to know if he/she feels the same way about you the same way you feel about them.

18. You are a believer in love

You are an optimist and you now believe that love exists. You experience and can even offer others your honest opinion on the subject of love.

19. You now love romantic movies…

You want to be connected to other scenarios of love and happy moments shared between couples.

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20. …And books too

You can now go to the book store and buy a book by Nicholas Sparks

Featured photo credit: htttp://www.stokpic.com via stokpic.com

More by this author

Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on November 18, 2021

10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

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10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

We all fall into the trap of judging a person’s character by their appearance. How wrong we are! All too often, the real character of the person only appears when some negative event hits them or you. Then you may see a toxic person emerging from the ruins and it is often a shock.

A truly frightening example is revealed in the book by O’Toole in Bowman called Dangerous Instincts: How Gut Instincts Betray Us. A perfectly respectable, charming, well dressed neighbor was found to have installed a torture chamber in his garage where he was systematically abusing kidnapped women. This is an extreme example, but it does show how we can be totally deceived by a person’s physical appearance, manners and behavior.

So, what can you do? You want to be able to assess personal qualities when you come into contact with colleagues, fresh acquaintances and new friends who might even become lifelong partners. You want to know if they are:

  • honest
  • reliable
  • competent
  • kind and compassionate
  • capable of taking the blame
  • able to persevere
  • modest and humble
  • pacific and can control anger.

The secret is to reserve judgment and take your time. Observe them in certain situations; look at how they react. Listen to them talking, joking, laughing, explaining, complaining, blaming, praising, ranting, and preaching. Only then will you be able to judge their character. This is not foolproof, but if you follow the 10 ways below, you have a pretty good chance of not ending up in an abusive relationship.

1. Is anger a frequent occurrence?

All too often, angry reactions which may seem to be excessive are a sign that there are underlying issues. Do not think that every person who just snaps and throws his/her weight around mentally and physically is just reacting normally. Everyone has an occasional angry outburst when driving or when things go pear-shaped.

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But if this is almost a daily occurrence, then you need to discover why and maybe avoid that person. Too often, anger will escalate to violent and aggressive behavior. You do not want to be near someone who thinks violence can solve personal or global problems.

2. Can you witness acts of kindness?

How often do you see this person being kind and considerate? Do they give money to beggars, donate to charity, do voluntary work or in some simple way show that they are willing to share the planet with about 7 billion other people?

I was shocked when a guest of mine never showed any kindness to the weak and disadvantaged people in our town. She was ostensibly a religious person, but I began to doubt the sincerity of her beliefs.

“The best index to a person’s character is how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and how he treats people who can’t fight back.”

Abigail Van Buren

3. How does this person take the blame?

Maybe you know that s/he is responsible for a screw-up in the office or even in not turning up on time for a date. Look at their reaction. If they start blaming other colleagues or the traffic, well, this is an indication that they are not willing to take responsibility for their mistakes.

4. Don’t use Facebook as an indicator.

You will be relieved to know that graphology (the study of that forgotten skill of handwriting) is no longer considered a reliable test of a person’s character. Neither is Facebook stalking, fortunately. A study showed that Facebook use of foul language, sexual innuendo and gossip were not reliable indicators of a candidate’s character or future performance in the workplace.

5. Read their emails.

Now a much better idea is to read the person’s emails. Studies show that the use of the following can indicate certain personality traits:

  • Too many exclamation points may reveal a sunny disposition
  • Frequent errors may indicate apathy
  • Use of smileys is the only way a person can smile at you
  • Use of the third person may reveal a certain formality
  • Too many question marks can show anger
  • Overuse of capital letters is regarded as shouting. They are a definite no-no in netiquette, yet a surprising number of  people still use them.

6. Watch out for the show offs.

Listen to people as they talk. How often do they mention their achievements, promotions, awards and successes? If this happens a lot, it is a sure indication that this person has an over-inflated view of his/her achievements. They are unlikely to be modest or show humility. What a pity!  Another person to avoid.

7. Look for evidence of perseverance.

A powerful indicator of grit and tenacity is when a person persists and never gives up when they really want to achieve a life goal. Look for evidence of them keeping going in spite of enormous difficulties.

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Great achievements by scientists and inventors all bear the hallmark of perseverance. We only have to think of Einstein, Edison (who failed thousands of times) and Nelson Mandela to get inspiration. The US Department of Education is in no doubt about how grit, tenacity and perseverance will be key success factors for youth in the 21st century.

8. Their empathy score is high.

Listen to how they talk about the less fortunate members of our society such as the poor, immigrants and the disabled. Do you notice that they talk in a compassionate way about these people? The fact that they even mention them is a strong indicator of empathy.

People with zero empathy will never talk about the disadvantaged. They will rarely ask you a question about a difficult time or relationship. They will usually steer the conversation back to themselves. These people have zero empathy and in extreme cases, they are psychopaths who never show any feelings towards their victims.

9. Learn how to be socially interactive.

We are social animals and this is what makes us so uniquely human. If a person is isolated or a loner, this may be a negative indicator of their character. You want to meet a person who knows about trust, honesty and loyalty. The only way to practice these great qualities is to actually interact socially. The great advantage is that you can share problems and celebrate success and joy together.

“One can acquire everything in solitude, except character.”

Stendhal

 10. Avoid toxic people.

These people are trying to control others and often are failing to come to terms with their own failures. Typical behavior and conversations may concern:

  • Envy or jealousy
  • Criticism of partners, colleagues and friends
  • Complaining about their own lack of success
  • Blaming others for their own bad luck or failure
  • Obsession with themselves and their problems

Listen to these people talk and you will quickly discover that you need to avoid them at all costs because their negativity will drag you down. In addition, as much as you would like to help them, you are not qualified to do so.

Now, having looked at some of the best ways to judge a person, what about yourself? How do others see you? Why not take Dr. Phil’s quiz and find out. Can you bear it?

Featured photo credit: Jacek Dylag via unsplash.com

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