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Tell Your Partner These 10 Things for a Relationship Built to Last

Tell Your Partner These 10 Things for a Relationship Built to Last

If you desire long-lasting relationship success, don’t forget to tell your partner these 10 essential things every day.

1. “I miss you.”

“If conversation was the lyrics, laughter was the music, making time spent together a melody that could be replayed over and over without getting stale.” – Nicholas Sparks

Telling your partner you miss them through a simple text or email will make them feel needed, wanted, and appreciated. If you’re home with the kids while your partner is at work, send them a group family photo with a message like, “We can’t wait for you to get home!”

2. “How was your day?”

“Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike.” – J.K. Rowling

Resist the temptation to go on a tirade about how terrible your day was as soon as you walk in the door. This isn’t to say you can’t rant and rave about a bad day, but doing so without consideration of your partner’s life is self-centered.

3. “Do you remember that time we ______?”

“Falling in love and having a relationship are two different things.” – Keanu Reeves

Relationships have a way of losing that magical “spark” as the months and years go by. Reminding your partner of your most cherished memories together—like your first vacation together, or that one time you got busted making out in a mall elevator—will help you remember why your relationship is so special in the first place.

4. “How can I help?”

“I want to be in a relationship where you telling me you love me is just a ceremonious validation of what you already show me.” – Steve Maraboli

If you’ve ever panicked in the morning because you’re running late to work and can’t find your keys, you know there are few things more stressful than losing something at an inopportune time. Lighten your partner’s load by asking them how you can help when they appear stressed out or overburdened.

5. “What do you think?”

“When you don’t talk, there’s a lot of stuff that ends up not getting said.” – Catherine Gilbert Murdock

Your relationship shouldn’t be a dictatorship, but rather a democracy. Ask your partner how they feel about all decisions big and small, from where to visit for summer vacation, to your children’s education.

6. “You’re so gorgeous/handsome/hot.”

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” – Leo Buscaglia

If you don’t compliment your partner, how can you expect them to feel wanted or appreciated? Tell them all about their strong-suits by saying things like:

  • Physical – “I love it when you smile, because you have the cutest dimples.”
  • Attitude – “I love how patient/thoughtful/kind/confident you are, because that makes me feel ____________..”
  • Attire – “I can’t stop checking out your butt in those jeans” or “Hello, tiger… you look quite GQ in that suit today!”

7. “Let’s meet in the middle.”

“Compromise is the best and cheapest lawyer.” – Robert Louis Stevenson

It’s easy to become convinced that you’re 100% right during a nasty fight, but please resist the urge to be stubborn. Thinking your partner is wrong about something isn’t an excuse to discount how they feel. Let go of your need to be right and work together as a team.

8. “I’m sorry. You’re right.”

“Every couple has ups and downs, every couple argues, and that’s the thing—you’re a couple, and couples can’t function without trust.” – Nicholas Sparks

Making a mistake is okay (within reason) as long as you’re humble enough to say you’re sorry and accept personal responsibility. Refusing to admit your mistakes, however, could turn what would have been a small squabble into an eternal dispute that destroys trust.

9. “Please” and “Thank you”

“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough” – Oprah Winfrey

Tell me which one you’d rather hear from your partner:

  • Take the dog outside.
  • Hey honey, could you please take the dog outside? I’m tied up with the laundry right now, so I’d really appreciate it. Thanks!

Big difference, am I right?

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10. “I love you.”

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” – Lao Tzu

No matter how long you’ve known a person, I can promise that those 3 words will never lose meaning.

If there’s anything you like to tell your partner every day that isn’t on this list, please tell us in the comments below.

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Daniel Wallen

Freelance Writer

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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