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Live A Beautiful Life In 10 Easy Steps

Live A Beautiful Life In 10 Easy Steps

Life is beautiful! And even more so if you are living a life filled with happiness, peace and contribution. However, many people, including myself, have lived a life full of possessions, with a soul full of hatred, a job that sucks the very life out of them, and an emptiness inside.

Even with its struggles and difficulties life can be beautiful, depending what you focus on. A beautiful life is one that makes you feel fully alive, is full of inspiration and creates a deeper, more connected environment for us to live in. With this in mind I’ve come up with a few steps on how to live a beautiful life.

1. Always be grateful for the blessings and gifts you already have.

A must for all people who want to or who are already living a beautiful life. If you can do just one thing out of all of these steps, I’d recommend this one: being thankful for all that you already have is the key to a beautiful life. Taking time out to be thankful even through the tough times will set you up for a happier, more peaceful existence. It will not only touch your own life but also those around you. How wonderful is that?

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2. Try to know and understand yourself.

Most of us have an idea of ourselves, yet very few actually know or understand who we really are. To begin the wonderful journey of living a beautiful life this is very important. You’ll need to take a good, hard look at the stuff that you may have been denying for years and that which has been under wraps without you even knowing. This is a chance for self-discovery and will include rediscovering your passions, desires, fears and insecurities. It might not be as easy as you first thought, so I’d suggest involving a good, trusted friend to help you dig a little deeper. Either way, this process will open your eyes and help you to see how your life has the potential to be beautiful.

3. Work out what a beautiful life means to you.

If you don’t feel that your life is beautiful right now, perhaps it’s time to ask yourself what it is that you think is missing? Is it a purpose, inspiration, happiness, or something else? Questions that delve deeper are important here like asking: “What is it that is keeping me stuck in this cycle of unhappiness? Is it fear of failure, rejection, or making the wrong choices?” Whatever it is, none of these are good enough reasons to be unhappy or not living a beautiful life.

4. Start to make changes to towards living your beautiful life.

When you know that a beautiful life is there for the taking, it will mean changes will need to be made in some areas of your life. It’s no good doing the same stuff because you’ll get the same results. All it takes is a little time to work out what maybe missing from your life or what needs letting go of.

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For example, if you want to find your purpose in life, perhaps it’s time to surround yourself with people who inspire, lift and encourage you rather than spending time with the same friends who have always brought you down. It might also mean that you need to start standing up for yourself a little bit more and saying no a bit more often; it’s the little things that can make all the difference.

5. Give away love to feel more love.

In order to live a beautiful life, love is one of the things that make life worth living. The thing is, however, most of the time we expect it to be given in order for us to give it back. Instead of thinking this way, why not live your life with love being the principle aim in all that you do, especially when interacting with other people in your day-to-day life? Everyone needs love in their life, whether it’s from a partner, a friend, family or a perfect stranger. Make your beautiful life more meaningful by giving love to everyone you meet in the form of kindness, understanding, tolerance, acceptance and generosity.

6. Practice forgiveness.

How can you have a beautiful life if you are full of resentment and bitterness? You can’t, is the simple answer! However, when someone has wronged you or let you down, it can prove difficult to forgive and forget.

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Forgiveness, however, is not about letting someone of the hook: it’s more about letting yourself off the hook! You see, forgiveness not only takes tremendous stress out of any situation, but it also sets you free. Why? Because if you hold on to anger, bitterness and resentment, they will only eat away at you, keeping you a prisoner of your feelings and hurting yourself in the meantime. It does you no good, and it also ensures that any steps you take towards your beautiful life will be in vain. So do yourself a favor, forgive and then move on with your life.

7. Look at things from a new perspective.

In times of trouble, when your circumstances leave a lot to be desired, it can be difficult to see what you are going through as a gift. However, if you look at the struggle as a new learning opportunity and ask yourself: “What is this situation trying to teach me?” you’ll go a long way to living a more beautiful life.

It’s that change in perspective that makes the harder times seem less so because you are taking the situation and turning it around. This is a wonderful way to view your life because the more you are mindful of what you can learn in any given situation, the more you will breeze through your struggles with effortless grace. Now that sounds great, don’t you think?

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8. Be more flexible in your thinking.

When our thinking is rigid and inflexible, it gives little room for change or improvement. To live a beautiful life it is beneficial to have the kind of mind that can be open and flexible, so that new information or unexpected situations can be grasped with less drama or stress. It’s when we are flexible in our approach to life we can enjoy and experience it with unbound possibilities.

9. Expect the best not the worst.

Life can be a roller-coaster ride, with its ups and downs, as well as triumphs and disappointments. When we expect the very best from people and situations, we start to fill our lives with a more positive outlook, as well as creating a more compassionate and understanding environment. If you learn to expect the best, you’ll bring more situations to you that will only ever be the best!

10. Live a beautiful life to make a difference in the world.

This isn’t about preaching to others on how you’ve changed your life, but more about being the kind of person who inspires others to live a beautiful life too. As Mahatma Gandhi famously said, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” In short, if you want to see a difference in the world and to make it a more beautiful place, then start with yourself!

So, are you ready to live a beautiful life?

Featured photo credit: Flickr sierra ryan via flickr.com

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Paula Lawes

Paula loves people and connecting. She writes about communication and relationships tips on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on September 18, 2020

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

For the original article by Celestine: 13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

“We all have problems. The way we solve them is what makes us different.” ~Unknown

“It’s not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” – Hans Selye

Have you ever experienced moments when things just don’t go your way? For example, losing your keys, accidentally spilling your drink, waking up late, missing your buses/trains, forgetting to bring your things, and so on?

You’re not alone. All of us, myself included, experience times when things don’t go as we expect.

Here is my guide on how to deal with daily setbacks.

1. Take a step back and evaluate

When something bad happens, take a step back and evaluate the situation. Some questions to ask yourself:

  1. What is the problem?
  2. Are you the only person facing this problem in the world today?
  3. How does this problem look like at an individual level? A national level? On a global scale?
  4. What’s the worst possible thing that can happen to you as a result of this?
  5. How is it going to impact your life in the next 1 year? 5 years? 10 years?

Doing this exercise is not to undermine the problem or disclaiming responsibility, but to consider different perspectives, so you can adopt the best approach for it. Most problems we encounter daily may seem like huge issues when they crop up, but most, if not all, don’t have much impact in our life beyond that day.

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2. Vent if you have to, but don’t linger on the problem

If you feel very frustrated and need to let off some steam, go ahead and do that. Talk to a friend, complain, crib about it, or scream at the top of your lungs if it makes you happy.

At the same time, don’t get caught up with venting. While venting may temporarily relieve yourself, it’s not going to solve the problem ultimately. You don’t want to be an energy vampire.

Vent if there’s a need to, but do it for 15 to 20 minutes. Then move on.

3. Realize there are others out there facing this too

Even though the situation may be frustrating, you’re not alone. Remember there are almost 7 billion people in the world today, and chances are that other people have faced the same thing before too. Knowing it’s not just you helps you to get out of a self-victimizing mindset.

4. Process your thoughts/emotions

Process your thoughts/emotions with any of the four methods:

  1. Journal. Write your unhappiness in a private diary or in your blog. It doesn’t have to be formal at all – it can be a brain dump on rough paper or new word document. Delete after you are done.
  2. Audio taping. Record yourself as you talk out what’s on your mind. Tools include tape recorder, your PC (Audacity is a freeware for recording/editing audio) and your mobile (most mobiles today have audio recording functions). You can even use your voice mail for this. Just talking helps you to gain awareness of your emotions. After recording, play back and listen to what you said. You might find it quite revealing.
  3. Meditation. At its simplest form, meditation is just sitting/lying still and observing your reality as it is – including your thoughts and emotions. Some think that it involves some complex mambo-jumbo, but it doesn’t.
  4. Talking to someone. Talking about it with someone helps you work through the issue. It also gets you an alternate viewpoint and consider it from a different angle.

5. Acknowledge your thoughts

Don’t resist your thoughts, but acknowledge them. This includes both positive and negative thoughts.

By acknowledging, I mean recognizing these thoughts exist. So if say, you have a thought that says, “Wow, I’m so stupid!”, acknowledge that. If you have a thought that says, “I can’t believe this is happening to me again”, acknowledge that as well.

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Know that acknowledging the thoughts doesn’t mean you agree with them. It’s simply recognizing the existence of said thoughts so that you can stop resisting yourself and focus on the situation on hand.

6. Give yourself a break

If you’re very stressed out by the situation, and the problem is not time sensitive, then give yourself a break. Take a walk, listen to some music, watch a movie, or get some sleep. When you’re done, you should feel a lot more revitalized to deal with the situation.

7. Uncover what you’re really upset about

A lot of times, the anger we feel isn’t about the world. You may start off feeling angry at someone or something, but at the depth of it, it’s anger toward yourself.

Uncover the root of your anger. I have written a five part anger management series on how to permanently overcome anger.

After that, ask yourself: How can you improve the situation? Go to Step #9, where you define your actionable steps. Our anger comes from not having control on the situation. Sitting there and feeling infuriated is not going to change the situation. The more action we take, the more we will regain control over the situation, the better we will feel.

8. See this as an obstacle to be overcome

As Helen Keller once said,

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”

Whatever you’re facing right now, see it as an obstacle to be overcome. In every worthy endeavor, there’ll always be countless obstacles that emerge along the way. These obstacles are what separate the people who make it, and those who don’t. If you’re able to push through and overcome them, you’ll emerge a stronger person than before. It’ll be harder for anything to get you down in the future.

9. Analyze the situation – Focus on actionable steps

In every setback, there are going to be things that can’t be reversed since they have already occurred. You want to focus on things that can still be changed (salvageable) vs. things that have already happened and can’t be changed. The only time the situation changes is when you take steps to improve it. Rather than cry over spilt milk, work through your situation:

  1. What’s the situation?
  2. What’s stressing you about this situation?
  3. What are the next steps that’ll help you resolve them?
  4. Take action on your next steps!

After you have identified your next steps, act on them. The key here is to focus on the actionable steps, not the inactionable steps. It’s about regaining control over the situation through direct action.

10. Identify how it occurred (so it won’t occur again next time)

A lot of times we react to our problems. The problem occurs, and we try to make the best out of what has happened within the context. While developing a healthy coping mechanism is important (which is what the other helping points are on), it’s also equally important, if not more, to understand how the problem arose. This way, you can work on preventing it from taking place next time, vs. dealing reactively with it.

Most of us probably think the problem is outside of our control, but reality is most of the times it’s fully preventable. It’s just a matter of how much responsibility you take over the problem.

For example, for someone who can’t get a cab for work in the morning, he/she may see the problem as a lack of cabs in the country, or bad luck. However, if you trace to the root of the problem, it’s probably more to do with (a) Having unrealistic expectations of the length of time to get a cab. He/she should budget more time for waiting for a cab next time. (b) Oversleeping, because he/she was too tired from working late the previous day. He/she should allocate enough time for rest next time. He/she should also pick up better time management skills, so as to finish work in lesser time.

11. Realize the situation can be a lot worse

No matter how bad the situation is, it can always be much worse. A plus point vs. negative point analysis will help you realize that.

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12. Do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it

No matter how bad your situation may seem, do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it. Life is too beautiful to worry so much over daily issues. Take a step back (#1), give yourself a break if you need to (#6), and do what you can within your means (#9). Everything else will unfold accordingly. Worrying too much about the outcome isn’t going to change things or make your life any better.

13. Pick out the learning points from the encounter

There’s something to learn from every encounter. What have you learned from this situation? What lessons have you taken away?

After you identify your learning points, think about how you’re going to apply them moving forward. With this, you’ve clearly gained something from this encounter. You’ve walked away a stronger, wiser, better person, with more life lessons to draw from in the future.

Get the manifesto version of this article: [Manifesto] What To Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way

Featured photo credit: Alice Donovan Rouse via unsplash.com

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