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Don’t Let These 4 Things Hold You Back From Realizing Your Dreams

Don’t Let These 4 Things Hold You Back From Realizing Your Dreams

Don’t let these things hold you back from realizing your dreams   Life is tough and we are all on different paths to success and happiness. I’m not going to go into what the meaning of what life is, or anything like that, that’s for you to argue in your own time. However, whatever the meaning is, sure enough you can guarantee that it’s going to be one hell of a journey and one thing that is certain, there will always be changes.   Whether your goal is to join NASA, find fame or to enjoy a quiet country life, there will always be obstacles that try us, people that deter us and circumstances that “aren’t the right time”. The key to overcoming these obstacles is firstly to recognize the things that are holding you back because only then can you possibly try to overcome them.

Don’t let these things hold you back from realizing your dreams…

The fear of failure

From a young age, we seem to demonstrate a fear of failure or embarrassment, which growing up might have stopped us from asking for that date or joining the sports club, but as we get older this innate fear can stop us from more serious desires such as perusing our dream career or having the courage to do what makes us happy. But if you don’t try you will never know.

Always think, what’s the worst that can happen? Sit down, make a calculated risk and go for it! Don’t fear rejection, failure or making mistakes. Fear being stagnant and standing still instead!

“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.”  – Jack Canfield

Listening to negative voices

From the little voice inside your head that tells you ‘you’re not good enough’, to listening to negative apprehension from concerned friends and family, these little voices can chip away at your self confidence and your attitude that you can do this. In the short term these negative voices might cause annoyance and irritation but in the long term they could fatally erode your confidence.

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If it’s you that is being the negative voice, eliminate the use of words such as ‘should’ ‘can’t’ or ‘I wish…’ from your vocabulary.

For example,

“I should have a monthly income from an employer but I want to be self employed”

Or

“I can’t possibly move abroad…”

Or

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“I wish I had the time to peruse my hobby and turn it into my career but…”

 

Someone has to be honest with you and I am telling you now, these are just excuses for inaction and not real legitimate hurdles!

If it is friends, families and acquaintances that are advising you not to follow your dream and are unknowingly holding you back, then don’t share your thoughts with them. That simple. Yes it is great to have feedback, but only if it is going to develop and progress you, not erode your confidence. Ask the experts for advice and sensible suggestions, not concerned friends that don’t know all the facts.

Striving for perfection

I got news for you, big news…life is never going to be “perfect” no matter how hard you try, so stop stressing to make it 100 percent perfect when you’d be just as happy with 90 percent perfection, which is also easier to obtain and maintain. I am not saying you shouldn’t try, push or progress but don’t do it to the detriment of your success and sanity.

“Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good” is something my boss used to always tell me in my first job after university, where my desperation for perfection was actually creating a negative effect, as my anxiety to be perfect had the reversed desired outcome.

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Always striving for perfection will cripple your ability to reach your goals and be happy doing it.

Your past haunting you

Everyone has a past which means everyone has baggage, fears and preconceptions. Making mistakes and learning from experiences is vital for a fulfilling life but don’t let the past haunt you. Just because it happened in the past, doesn’t mean it will necessarily happen again.

For example,

If you have been burnt with the failure of a start up business in the past, it doesn’t mean it will happen again, so don’t let it be a ghost of your future success.

Or perhaps you have experienced a negative emotional relationship in a past? Just because someone else was a dirt bag, doesn’t mean your future partner will be too.

 

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Life is for making mistakes and having fun whilst learning.

Be brave.

Follow your dreams.

Featured photo credit: http://picjumbo.com/ via picjumbo.com

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Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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