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16 Things You Should Tell Yourself To Lead A Positive Life

16 Things You Should Tell Yourself To Lead A Positive Life

Living a positive life can be as simple as what we tell ourselves. Our self-talk may be more important than what the world is telling us. The best part? We can change what we say in our heads!

1. I’m capable

I am able to take care of the things that need to be done in my life, from the simple to the complex. There isn’t anything I can’t conquer.

Remember that you are capable even when you are unsure. Some things might seem intimidating at first, but you are able to do much more than you even think possible.

2. I am confident

The next time I walk into that meeting I am going to square my shoulders, take a deep breath, put a smile on my face and talk with confidence.

Confidence is a way of walking in the world. You don’t have to know everything, have it all or even be the very best. You just have to tell yourself that you can do it and stand tall; no one will know that you aren’t 100% sure.

3. I love challenges

Bring it on! I am able to take life’s challenges head on and work through them learning new and exciting things along the way.

Life isn’t meant to be easy. Working hard and finding new ways of getting things done is what makes it all fun.

4. I’m moving forward

I know that each step I am taking is moving me right where I want to be. I’m not stuck in a rut at all! In fact, I am making great progress into my future plans. It might not look like I’m moving forward every day towards my goals, but I can tell in small changes I am making that I am moving right ahead.

5. I make great decisions

I am making decisions that are the best for me in my life right now. I know that when there are challenges I will be able to make the right decision. There isn’t anyone who can make decisions for me better than me. I know exactly what is right for me when I’m eating out, making my next career move, or in my relationships.

6. I don’t need other people’s approval

I know that I don’t need other people’s approval or compliments to make me feel like I am doing the right thing or am headed in the right direction.

If you are looking for other people to approve everything you do; stop. You are not a child anymore and you need to find approval in yourself and stop looking outside. Your boss, best friend and partner isn’t going to notice every good thing that you do, and that is ok.

7. I am lovable

I know that I am lovable just as I am. I don’t have to change how I look, how I laugh or what I’m doing to be more lovable.

If you are worrying about being lovable write yourself a note and post it on your bathroom mirror that you are lovable just the way you are and read it every single day. You need to internalize this and believe it to the bottom of your heart.

8. I am responsible for my own happiness

I don’t have to find my happiness from other people. If I want to be happier I can do exactly what I need to do to make that happen. In fact, no one else is in charge of making me happy.

9. My feelings are just feelings, neither good nor bad

I don’t have to get in a tizzy over feeling sad, mad or frustrated.

Those are feelings just like being happy, pleased and calm. None of those feelings are good or bad and the best part is they pass onto something else in no time.

10. I don’t compare myself to others

I know that comparing myself to others is a cycle of disappointment and there is no reason to do it. I don’t know their whole story and they could be going through things, good or bad, that I don’t know about at all. No one is better or worse than I am and that idea is so freeing.

11. I can ask for help

I know that I am worth someone else’s time and am able to ask for help when I need it. I don’t ask all of the time and when I need it I am serious about needing it.

You might need help doing something simple or complex and when you ask for it the right person will hear you and help.

12. I am capable of setting my own priorities

I know what is best for me and I will take the steps I need to make my priorities fit my life. I know exactly what would be right for me.

13. I am human; I make mistakes

Even though I want to be perfect I know I’m human and things don’t always work out. I can’t be defined by my mistakes and I fix them when they happen.

Most mistakes are minimal and beating yourself up isn’t going to make it any better. Just get to the work of making it better.

14. It’s OK to change my mind

I might decide to do something and then decide it isn’t the right thing and that is my right. I know that I need to do what is right in my life and not stay stuck in something that I used to think.

15. I have the right to be treated with respect

I treat others with respect and I expect the same for myself. There is no reason to degrade or accept less than what I am comfortable with in conversations or in actions.

It is often said that people have to earn respect, but that isn’t true. Everyone deserves respect, even you.

16. I deserve it; why settle for less

I deserve the good things that come into my life; why would I ever settle for less? I am worthy of all that is good and I know it and will not accept less in my life.

If you are settling for a life that isn’t what you want make the changes that need to happen.

If you have any other things to say about yourself to lead a positive life, please leave it in the comments below.

Featured photo credit: jluck via

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Last Updated on May 28, 2020

10 Success Principles for Living Your Dream Life

10 Success Principles for Living Your Dream Life

Are you stressed out and overwhelmed, wishing you had more time to do the things that really matter? Are you ready to do something better, something special in your life or your career?

You were born with a gift that no one else in the world can express like you. When you dance to your own music, you naturally develop your innate abilities and excel in work and life. You are a total rock star. But when you live someone else’s idea of who you should be, it throws off your groove.

Many people—maybe you—stopped following their dreams way too early in life because their talents were ignored, minimized, or shamed. They didn’t have the chops to win an American Idol competition or nab an Olympic gold medal, so they stopped expressing their inborn gifts altogether.

You don’t need to be an award winner to rock your life. Living your dream life is about discovering your superpowers and feeling vibrant and joyful when you use them. It’s about owning what makes you unique and finding like-minded people to support you.

Here are 10 success principles to help you live a rich and rewarding life on your terms that have worked with thousands of people in my workshops and will work for you, too.

1. Get a Hobby to Move Closer to Your Dreams

If you never became a professional dancer or a world-renowned author, it does NOT mean you should stop dancing or writing! These activities make you come alive, even if you “only” do them as favorite pastimes.

Engaging in a hobby is one of the most important success principles you can follow to move closer to your dreams.

When you try something creative for the first time or in a long while, you begin to see opportunities at work and in life that you were unaware of before. You also feel happier and more energized, according to a recent study from New Zealand.[1]

Some of my most burned-out executive clients reinvigorated their careers by discovering a creative outlet that refueled them after the workday ended. Research at San Francisco State University shows that having a hobby lowers stress and helps you succeed at work.[2]

So, give yourself permission to try new things and revisit old passions you gave up long ago. Setting aside just one hour a week for personal exploration can significantly change your life.

Who knows? Your creative outlet could transform into a thriving business or lead to a new profession down the road.

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2. Focus on Your Strengths, Not Your Weaknesses

Did you know that you are more likely to succeed when you develop your natural strengths rather than work on your weaknesses? The problem is that you probably don’t know where your true talents lie.

Here are a few options to help you discover your unique strengths. You can:

  • Take the VIA Character Strengths Survey[3]
  • Try Gallup’s CliftonStrengths Assessment[4]
  • Answer a few Superpower Questions

Once you understand what makes you tick, you can use these skills at work and your personal life to get more done in less time. If you boost your unique abilities through practice and study, you can accelerate your career and become a leader in a field that matters to you. It’s worth investing in yourself this way.

3. Jumping off a Cliff is NOT Required

Here’s the deal: most people are too afraid to change. When participants first come to my workshops, they tell me they have mouths to feed, bills to pay, and fear that if they follow their dreams, someone will get hurt.

The old saying “leap and the net shall appear” does not comfort them. Because they are hesitant to plunge into the unknown, they believe their only option is to stay put where they are in life. Can you relate?

You do not have to sacrifice the life you have now to start a new one. I was a psychology professor by day and singer by night for years before I transitioned into a full-time music career.

Just take a little time out each week to do what enlivens you through a hobby, volunteer work, etc. Get a feel for it.

Is it what you really want? If so, increase the time you spend doing it and make the transition when the time feels right.

4. Give Your Inner Critic Some Love

The main culprit that keeps you from stepping outside your comfort zone and getting the life of your dreams is KCRP or K-CRAP – the radio station that plays 24/7 in your head. The moment you try to do something interesting with your life it slaps you down with such chart-topping killer hooks as “Who do you think you are?” and “You’ll never be good enough!”.

Have you ever noticed that KCRP’s mean-spirited DJ sounds like your parents, teachers, bosses, and other authority figures who shut you down creatively? These folks don’t need to stifle you any longer (although they often still do) because your inner critic does it for them. That keeps you stuck in a rut.

To break free, try thinking of this DJ as a gruff old grandfather who gives you crap to keep you safe. Remember, this grumpy grandpa is woefully out of touch with the times. So, his stern opinions don’t really matter much, do they? Give him a pat on the back for his good intentions, and put your focus back on what makes you come alive.

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This success principle will give you the courage to venture into the unknown where you can dance to the beat of your own drummer.

5. Embrace Your Inner Weirdo

Many of us don’t go after our dreams because we’re afraid folks will find out how odd or strange we are. But our little eccentricities often turn out to be our greatest strengths. Yes, it’s good to be quirky.

Odds are, you lost track of your true passions and talents before you were even old enough to know you were getting off-track. You became slowly “adulterated” by learning to:

  • Take on family roles that don’t match who you really are.
  • Spit back what teachers taught you in school rather than risk getting bad grades for being original.
  • Hide parts of yourself that don’t seem acceptable to certain social groups.

The price for fitting in is that you may wind up leading a life that doesn’t fit you all that well. Your true calling becomes clear when you embrace what makes you different from others and allow yourself to stand out from the crowd, even if it feels awkward.

Often, the very qualities you view as your flaws are your greatest gifts.

6. See the Bigger Picture to Find Your True Calling

I cannot stress the importance of this success principle enough. Your true calling is right in front of you. But you may miss it because you’re looking for it in the wrong place.

To “see” it clearly, try widening your point of view.

Case in point: Maria felt she needed to retire early from being a police detective, so she could travel abroad. I encouraged Maria to think of ways that she could continue to serve as a law enforcer (a career she loved) and travel overseas at the same time.

A few months later, Maria landed a job with the United Nations in Bosnia training the local police force to understand and embrace human rights procedures.

Like Maria, you are an everyday rock star capable of accomplishing greater things than you can imagine. Is what you’re looking for right in front of you, too? Do you have an inkling of what it may be?

Look beyond your day-to-day activities, your current job, and even the town you live in. View your life from an eagle’s perspective and be open to new possibilities.

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7. Try a Little Wish-List Magic

Pretend I’m your fairy godmother and I give you permission right now to be your most magnificent self. What kind of life would be music to your ears? It doesn’t matter whether it seems unattainable or even downright crazy. Write it down on a wish list.

Get quiet. Be honest. Think big.

What would you like your career, your relationships, your health, your finances, and your spiritual life to be like? Jot down enough details so that your wishes seem tangible to you. Then, look at this list every morning before you start your day and every night before you go to sleep.

Sounds silly? It’s not. It works! Permitting yourself to daydream about a rich and fulfilling life is the first step to manifesting it.

8. Take Breaks to Get Clues About Your Ideal Future

Did you know that working straight through to a deadline leads to diminishing returns? Research shows that taking a break for 15 minutes every 75 to 90 minutes can help you recharge, refresh your focus, and get more done in less time.[5]

Wait, it gets better! A Stanford study shows that walking increases your creative output increases by 60 percent. Doing repetitive activities such as walking, running, riding your bike, swimming, and sweeping allow solutions to problems to pop into your mind out of nowhere.[6]

What does this success principle have to do with creating your dream life?

These mini-breaks allow you to get vital clues for what to do next to attain your ideal future. Plus, you won’t waste precious time and energy getting lost in other people’s agendas.

9. Take Action on Your Inspired Ideas

Once an inspired thought pops into your mind, take action.

This is one of the most powerful success principles for turning your dreams into reality; the sooner the better. Whatever it is—from calling an old friend to taking a new route home—be sure to do it!

Pay attention to your oddball hunches. You need to go after what you want, not just dream about it. As comedian Jim Carrey warns,

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“You can’t just visualize and go eat a sandwich.”

10. Count Your Rockstar Moments

Still not sure you have what it takes to get your dream life? This final success principle is guaranteed to help.

Make a list of everything you’ve ever accomplished. As you read back through it, put a star next to each item, and let it sink in.

You’ll be pleasantly surprised by how good you’ll feel about yourself afterward. You’ll also see how effective you’ve been in the past at getting what you want. You’ve succeeded before, you can succeed again.

You already rock. You just need to own it. Trust me, you’ve got this!

Final Thoughts

Eleanor Roosevelt said,

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”

Following these success principles will help you find the time and energy to do the things that really matter and live with clear intention.

By spending just one hour a week doing something you love, focusing on your strengths and achievements, embracing what makes you different, and acting on inspired ideas, you can create a life that is a perfect fit for you, step-by-step.

If you don’t have a clue about what your dream life could look like yet, don’t worry. Your heart knows. It has been “talking” to you for a long time. It’s just being muffled by KCRP, buried under a lot of “shoulds” and fear.

This article can also help you figure out the life you truly want to live: How to Get Motivated and Be Happy Every Day When You Wake Up.

Stand still, get quiet, and listen. It’s constantly telling you what you need to do to realize your own rockstar potential. It may be just a whisper now, but the more you pay attention to it, the louder it will get, and the easier it will be to follow.

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Featured photo credit: Rahul Dey via unsplash.com

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