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15 Ways To Lead A Brand New Great Life

15 Ways To Lead A Brand New Great Life

…without leaving your current one.

Leading a brand new, great life is not as hard as you think – and you don’t have to bail on your current one to make it happen. All you really need is the desire and willingness to make it happen.

It is normal and natural to wish for “something more” in life and to feel frustrated that everything feels like “same old same old” yet you really don’t want to take drastic measures such as ditching your spouse or bailing on your kids to go live on a mountain top and meditate.

So what can you do? How can you take your current humdrum existence and turn it into a brand new great life for yourself?

Enjoy the Power of Fresh Perspective

Perspective, my friend (don’t worry, we’ll get to some exact how-to’s momentarily).  Suppose you went out the door today, and like you always do, you stop by the donut shop on your way to work even though you promised yourself you would focus on lowering your cholesterol. So there you are, walking out of the donut shop hoping your spouse doesn’t randomly drive by and see your culinary transgression, when a meteor falls brightly from the sky. The donut shop explodes and a shard of glass impales your leg. Flash forward, you’re being released from the emergency room with a bandaged leg thanking your lucky stars you are still alive and swearing you’ll never eat a donut again and that you’ll absolutely start writing that novel, something you’ve always dreamed of doing.

After an experience like this you’d suddenly have a bright new perspective and all those activities that felt humdrum yesterday would be brighter and bolder; food would taste better; that evening kiss with your spouse would be more sensual; your kids’ laughter would feel musical instead of too loud.

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Being shaken up can shift everything for us. The good news is you don’t have to wait for a meteor to create a brand new life for yourself; you can shake yourself up with a few choices and over time you will be leading that new great life.

So let’s get started on making your life great, minus the meteor.

Make life shiny and new and great – for you!

1. Alter 1 thing in your environment, right now

Sameness makes us stop noticing. Have you ever noticed that you don’t even see those photographs on the wall anymore? Go head, switch them around in a new order or put them on a whole new wall. Or move your favorite chair to a new location. Just one thing, do it now. Go ahead, we’ll wait.

2. Change your morning routine by bouncing

Welcome back. Tomorrow morning do something entirely out of the ordinary from your usual routine. And I don’t mean switching from one cup of coffee to two. I mean, wake up and bounce on the end of your bed while singing Happy Birthday or Amazing Grace – whatever. It’s okay if your spouse thinks you’ve gone cuckoo – with any luck they’ll join in.

3. Stop being too serious – laugh at your boss

You know the saying, don’t sweat the small stuff – it’s all small stuff. Go back to our meteor. A near death experience always makes us realize we’ve been overly serious about things that don’t really matter. So, today, pick one thing which you are very serious about and laugh at it. I apologize now if laughing at your boss gets you fired. Hey, at least that would really shake things up, right?

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4. Get turned onto your life with things you like

Sit down right now and list 5 things you did yesterday that you like doing. Is it hard? Then you’re not doing enough things you like to do. Make another list – things you like to do and add 1 new thing a day for a week.

5. Do things with love because Intent matters

You can do things with love, or begrudgingly. Did your spouse tell you to mop the kitchen floor? Well, do it with love. Really. Force yourself to do this at least once a day and before you know it, you’ll actually be feeling better about those things you used to hate.

6. Give as if you’ll die tomorrow

The single best way to feel more happy and fulfilled is to give to others. Go out of your way today and every day to help someone out – I mean watch for the opportunity and take it. Do this with your family and loved ones, and at least one stranger. This is one of the single best things you can do to have your life take on a shiny new meaning.

7. Random dancing

This is a personal favorite. Anywhere you are, the more public and humiliating a place the better, and just dance. No music needed. If you’re a parent and you can embarrass your kids by doing this, you get bonus points.

8. Pause and breathe

There’s a lot of do, do, do, in today’s society. So stop, really stop. Sit down in your newly moved favorite chair and breathe deeply for an entire minute. No TV, no book, just you and the air. Pausing to breathe every day will bring you back to the moment so you’ll enjoy everything more.

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9. Enjoy your creativity

Living and thinking creatively is one of the biggest keys to having a life you love and are fulfilled by. So if you want to write, then write. This is the part where you actually have to take action and not just think about it. Using your creativity every day in some way will keep your mind fresh and actually does build a new life within your current existence.

10. Start a gratitude journal

Stop whining and start being grateful. Every day write down one thing you are really grateful for – and don’t list material possessions.

11. Break your eating routing for a day

If you’re a health fanatic, eat junk. If you’re junk food addict, eat healthy. You can do anything for one day. Does eating different make you feel differently? Allow the experience to give you a little introspection.

12. Give to yourself

You need to give to yourself with love, too. Take your vitamins, go for a walk, or call in sick and lie in bed with your spouse. Wealthy people always pay themselves first – and I’m not talking about money.

13. Move through a fear

Fear stops us from being as much of ourselves as we can be. Yup, fear is scary. What are you afraid of? As they say, feel the fear and do it anyway. Moving through it brings you to the other side – which is always bright and shiny.

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14. Take control of something

As human beings we tend to feel lousy about our lives when we perceive that things are out of our control. It can make us angry and depressed. So, take control of something. Cleaning clutter is good for reestablishing control so tackle that junk drawer or countertop or nightstand. The point is to pick one thing that is in your control and do it.

15. Begin on one long term goal

Do you have a dream? That one thing you’ve always wanted to do? Get your pilots license? Write a book? Grow the best hydrangeas in your neighborhood? Now is the time to take one of your dreams and start working toward it. Don’t pick something you can do in a day – make this something that will take you months to accomplish. You need to experience planning toward your dream, taking action, and then ultimately having it as part of your brand new shiny life.

I guarantee that if you use these ideas and ways to lead a brand new great life, within a few weeks, you will be. Yippee!

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Last Updated on August 6, 2020

6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

We’ve all done it. That moment when a series of words slithers from your mouth and the instant regret manifests through blushing and profuse apologies. If you could just think before you speak! It doesn’t have to be like this, and with a bit of practice, it’s actually quite easy to prevent.

“Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.” – Napolean Hill

Are we speaking the same language?

My mum recently left me a note thanking me for looking after her dog. She’d signed it with “LOL.” In my world, this means “laugh out loud,” and in her world it means “lots of love.” My kids tell me things are “sick” when they’re good, and ”manck” when they’re bad (when I say “bad,” I don’t mean good!). It’s amazing that we manage to communicate at all.

When speaking, we tend to color our language with words and phrases that have become personal to us, things we’ve picked up from our friends, families and even memes from the internet. These colloquialisms become normal, and we expect the listener (or reader) to understand “what we mean.” If you really want the listener to understand your meaning, try to use words and phrases that they might use.

Am I being lazy?

When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, a strange metamorphosis takes place. People tend to become lazier in the way that they communicate with each other, with less thought for the feelings of their partner. There’s no malice intended; we just reach a “comfort zone” and know that our partners “know what we mean.”

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Here’s an exchange from Psychology Today to demonstrate what I mean:

Early in the relationship:

“Honey, I don’t want you to take this wrong, but I’m noticing that your hair is getting a little thin on top. I know guys are sensitive about losing their hair, but I don’t want someone else to embarrass you without your expecting it.”

When the relationship is established:

“Did you know that you’re losing a lot of hair on the back of your head? You’re combing it funny and it doesn’t help. Wear a baseball cap or something if you feel weird about it. Lots of guys get thin on top. It’s no big deal.”

It’s pretty clear which of these statements is more empathetic and more likely to be received well. Recognizing when we do this can be tricky, but with a little practice it becomes easy.

Have I actually got anything to say?

When I was a kid, my gran used to say to me that if I didn’t have anything good to say, I shouldn’t say anything at all. My gran couldn’t stand gossip, so this makes total sense, but you can take this statement a little further and modify it: “If you don’t have anything to say, then don’t say anything at all.”

A lot of the time, people speak to fill “uncomfortable silences,” or because they believe that saying something, anything, is better than staying quiet. It can even be a cause of anxiety for some people.

When somebody else is speaking, listen. Don’t wait to speak. Listen. Actually hear what that person is saying, think about it, and respond if necessary.

Am I painting an accurate picture?

One of the most common forms of miscommunication is the lack of a “referential index,” a type of generalization that fails to refer to specific nouns. As an example, look at these two simple phrases: “Can you pass me that?” and “Pass me that thing over there!”. How often have you said something similar?

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How is the listener supposed to know what you mean? The person that you’re talking to will start to fill in the gaps with something that may very well be completely different to what you mean. You’re thinking “pass me the salt,” but you get passed the pepper. This can be infuriating for the listener, and more importantly, can create a lack of understanding and ultimately produce conflict.

Before you speak, try to label people, places and objects in a way that it is easy for any listeners to understand.

What words am I using?

It’s well known that our use of nouns and verbs (or lack of them) gives an insight into where we grew up, our education, our thoughts and our feelings.

Less well known is that the use of pronouns offers a critical insight into how we emotionally code our sentences. James Pennebaker’s research in the 1990’s concluded that function words are important keys to someone’s psychological state and reveal much more than content words do.

Starting a sentence with “I think…” demonstrates self-focus rather than empathy with the speaker, whereas asking the speaker to elaborate or quantify what they’re saying clearly shows that you’re listening and have respect even if you disagree.

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Is the map really the territory?

Before speaking, we sometimes construct a scenario that makes us act in a way that isn’t necessarily reflective of the actual situation.

A while ago, John promised to help me out in a big way with a project that I was working on. After an initial meeting and some big promises, we put together a plan and set off on its execution. A week or so went by, and I tried to get a hold of John to see how things were going. After voice mails and emails with no reply and general silence, I tried again a week later and still got no response.

I was frustrated and started to get more than a bit vexed. The project obviously meant more to me than it did to him, and I started to construct all manner of crazy scenarios. I finally got through to John and immediately started a mild rant about making promises you can’t keep. He stopped me in my tracks with the news that his brother had died. If I’d have just thought before I spoke…

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