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10 Signs You’re Dating the Wrong Person

10 Signs You’re Dating the Wrong Person

Do you have any exes who were so awful you can’t help wondering, “What the hell was I thinking?” Join the club. If you’d like to make sure you’re with Mr. or Ms. Right, watch out for these 10 signs you’re dating the wrong person.

1. You feel like you have to wear a mask.

If you’re putting on a song-and-dance in an elaborate attempt to impress your partner, you might be dating the wrong person.

Your partner should love you as you are. Does it feel like they are trying to mold you into an entirely different person? If so, it might be time to let them go.

2. They think the world revolves around them.

If it seems like your partner is more interested in how you fit in their world than they are with your individual needs, you might be dating the wrong person.

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Even though you just went to his parents’ house for Thanksgiving last year, he gets upset when you suggest visiting your parents this year. Despite the fact that she knows you haven’t had a night out with the guys in over a month because work’s been so busy, she pitches a fit because you’re not spending time with her. If your partner’s words and actions scream, “ME-ME-ME,” you should find someone who appreciates your needs (and not only theirs).

3. Your friends and family haven’t met them.

If you haven’t introduced your partner to your friends or family despite spending a decent amount of time together, you might be dating the wrong person.

Let’s just face it, shall we? There are only a few reasons why you wouldn’t introduce your partner to your friends or family, and none of them are pretty. If you’re so embarrassed by this person that you don’t want to invite them into your social circles, do everyone a favor and pull the plug.

4. They don’t really listen to you.

If your partner is always waiting for their turn to speak, you might be dating the wrong person.

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They always go off on tangents about their day at work, but never seem interested in yours. They always suggest where they’d like to go, but never seem to care what you think. If your partner does a whole lot of speaking (but never listens), you might want to find someone not so self-centered to share your life with.

5. Hanging out with them drains you.

If spending time with your partner exhausts you, you might be dating the wrong person.

Even the best of relationships include the occasional fight, but this should be the exception, not the norm. You should feel happy and alive with your partner, not sad and stuck.

6. You avoid difficult conversations.

If every difficult chat gets swept under the rug, you might be dating the wrong person.

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Should you bring up things like politics, religion, favorite sexual positions, or your desire to have five children on the first date? Probably not. But as the weeks and months and years go on, it becomes more and more important to have those tough (but necessary) conversations. If you want to have children but your partner doesn’t, you might have a problem. If your religion is a top priority but your partner is anything but a devout follower, you need to have a chat. If there’s something the matter, say so (because no, your partner isn’t a psychic).

7. Your relationship is their one and only interest.

If your partner has no hobbies or interests outside of your relationship, you might be dating the wrong person.

Who would want to date a person who isn’t passionate about anything? Tread carefully if your partner has zero life goals, because relationships with a person lacking ambition are anything but fulfilling. And that brings us to…

8. They expect 24/7 companionship.

If your partner is so clingy you want to scream, you might be dating the wrong person.

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It is unhealthy and unwise to expect a person to be your singular source of happiness. Alone time isn’t merely just something that would be nice to have, but rather a necessity for your mental health.

9. You never feel like you’re “good enough.”

If your partner never has anything nice to say, you might be dating the wrong person.

No matter how hard you try, you feel like you can’t do anything right. No matter how much you do, you feel like you always have to prove yourself. No matter how much you love them, you feel like they don’t return the feeling.

10. You can’t imagine a future together without laughing or crying.

If the thought of a life-long commitment makes you want to curl up in a ball and weep, you might be dating the wrong person.

I know the thought of being alone might not appeal to you, but staying in a relationship that is destined for failure is as silly as it gets. If you have no future with this person, end the relationship and find someone you can be happy with.

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Daniel Wallen

Freelance Writer

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Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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