Advertising
Advertising

10 Reasons Why Some People Have Frequent Breakups

10 Reasons Why Some People Have Frequent Breakups

“Always start a relationship by asking: Do I have ulterior motives for wanting to relate to this person? Is my caring conditional? Am I trying to escape something? Am I planning to change the person? Do I need this person to help me make up for a deficiency in myself? If your answer to any of these questions is “yes,” leave the person alone. He or she is better off without you.”

—Leo Buscaglia

Love is the most elusive factor we constantly battle with; yet we continue to crave for love. However, most of us constantly face rejections. Here are the possible outcomes why some people have frequent breakups.

1. They never fix their perimeters.

The common mistake is that we constantly loose our ego boundaries when we are in love. It’s ok to lose now and then; sometimes losing is winning too. However if it were a habit, you would succumb to the will of your partner leaving all your integrity at stake resulting in a conflict.

Never forget: Do not loose ego boundaries

Advertising

2. They literally “FALL” in love.

Love is eternal; infatuation is hormonal; it gives you an initial push—most of us fall for it and whine after few days asserting that, “Love fades away.” Love never fades away, infatuation does. Love is hard work and you will get what you give.

Never forget: “Love is not infatuation”

3. They fail to express.

The lump in the throat is pretty normal when you decide to express your love. Make yourself vulnerable by daring to be honest; you will be surprised by the results. Don’t say that your partner has to understand; be expressive—what comes from the heart touches the heart.

Never forget: If you love someone, express

4. They justify pity as “LOVE.”

Being sensitive is strength, but also a weakness. If someone comes and share their sob story, we tend to incline. It is perfectly all right to love them too, but reconsider several times whether it is pity or love. Pity and love are too different emotions. If you love out of pity, you end up in pit.

Advertising

Never forget: Pity is not love  

5. They desperately try to prove their love.

“How can you prove something which is intangible? Most of us desperately try to prove that we love truly, madly and deeply. We have to care and share out of abundance not out of compulsion to prove something. Love is not science to prove; it’s an abstract feeling.

Never forget: Love has to be felt, not proved

6. They love to attain “STATUS.”

Love is not a calculation to conceive all possible balancing factors and take the decision. Love always denies social order. All the greatest love stories have gravest challenges. If you consider your options, love is limited to a business deal and sadly it is not love.

Never forget: Love has nothing to do with social order

Advertising

7. They have fixed mindsets.

Mind maps have to be regularly restructured to understand the paradoxes of life. Having fixed mindsets would result in constricted thinking that lead to predicaments. If we have fixed mindsets, we never evolve in relationships because what we argue is just an interpretation, not the truth.

Never forget: There are no truths, only interpretations

8. They try to fill their empty hearts.

“Only an abundant heart can share, not an empty heart.”

Love yourself first and let the love overflow so as to share with others. Empty hearts are craving and conditional, abundant hearts are unconditional and complete.

Never forget: Only abundant hearts can share love

Advertising

9. They try to change the partner.

Change is inevitable but cannot be forced. So trust the process, expecting the partner to change is stupidity; love is all about embracing imperfections. Let us not make our partners perfect; let us love them with all their imperfections because they have to do the same for us.

Never forget – Change is personal, cannot be compelled

10. They desperately chase love.

If it is not mutual, it is not love. So stop chasing and manipulating. Love is like a butterfly: as long as we chase, we won’t catch. Once we are busy in our own endeavors, love silently rests upon us. Do what you love to do and the love will follow.

Never forget: Never ever chase love

More by this author

KAMAL SUCHARAN BURRI

Founding Director, Newlight Cinemas

10 Storytelling Secrets That Everyone Needs To Know 20 Inspiring Quotes From Animated Movies 10 Secrets Of Life Steve Jobs Would Want You To Know 30 lessons I’ve learned on reaching 30 12 Important Life Lessons I’ve Learnt After A BreaK Up

Trending in Communication

1 50+ Best Motivational Quotes To Prepare You For Any Challenges In Life 2 A List of 100 Questions to Ask Your Partner on Date Nights 3 21 Best Tips On Making A Long Distance Relationship Work 4 The Top 10 Dating Apps That You Won’t Regret Downloading 5 10 Ways To Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone And Overcome Your Fear

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on October 18, 2018

50+ Best Motivational Quotes To Prepare You For Any Challenges In Life

50+ Best Motivational Quotes To Prepare You For Any Challenges In Life

Life is filled with highs and lows —happiness and struggles that will test your resilience and integrity, push you to overcome challenges and leave you with lessons that will make you even stronger on your way up.

It’s the way you feel and think about yourself, including your expectations and beliefs about what is possible to you, greatly determines everything that happens to you.

It all starts with your thoughts. When you change your thoughts, you transform the quality of your life. (Right, Nancy’s story is a typical example!)

Below is a list of the best motivational quotes to inspire you to start your day with a blast:

Quotes for self-assurance

1. Don’t downgrade your dream just to fit your reality, upgrade your conviction to match your destiny.

    2. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think.

      3. You are confined only by the walls you build yourself.

        4. The man who has confidence in himself gains the confidence of others

          5. You attract what you are, not what you want. If you want great, then be great.

            6. It’s not who you are that holds you behind, it’s who you think your are not.

              Quotes about positivity

              7. Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and think of what could go right.

                8. You should never regret anything in life. If it’s good, it’s wonderful. If it’s bad, it is experience.

                  9. Falling down is an accident, staying down is a choice.

                  Advertising

                    10. If you have the power to make someone happy, do it. The world needs more of that.

                      11. Always believe that something wonderful is about to happen.

                        12. Don’t be afraid to give up the good and go for great.

                          13. Remember that life’s greatest lessons are usually learned from worst times and from the worst mistakes.

                            Quotes for work and success

                            14. Don’t talk, just act. Don’t say, just show. Don’t promise, just prove.

                              15. Never stop doing great just because someone doesn’t give you credit.

                                16. Discipline is doing what needs to be done, even if you don’t want to.

                                  17. Work while they sleep. Learn while they party. Save while they spend. Live like they dream.

                                    18. The key to success is to focus our conscious mind on things we desire, not things we fear.

                                      19. Never apologize for having high standards, people who really want to be in your life will rise to meet them.

                                        20. If it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you.

                                        Advertising

                                          21. Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it, time will pass anyway.

                                            22. Don’t fear failure. Fear being in the exact same place next year as you are today.

                                              23. A hill is just another opportunity to leave your competition behind.

                                                24. Don’t quit. You’re already in pain. You’re already hurt. Get a reward from it.

                                                  25. Hustle until you no longer need to introduce yourself.

                                                    26. You didn’t come this far only to come this far.

                                                      27. Be selective in your battles for sometimes peace is better than being right.

                                                        28 If we keep doing what we are doing, we’re going to keep getting what we’re getting.

                                                          29. You will never know your limits until you push yourself to them.

                                                            30. Do what you have to do until you can do what you want to do.

                                                              31. The man on top of the mountain didn’t fall there.

                                                              Advertising

                                                                32. If your dreams don’t scare you, they are not big enough.

                                                                  33. If you can’t handle stress, you won’t manage success.

                                                                    34. Don’t be pushed by your problems, be led by your dreams.

                                                                      35. Don’t mistake silence for weakness. Smart people don’t plan big moves out loud.

                                                                        36. Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.

                                                                          37. Obsessed is the word the lazy use to describe dedicated.

                                                                            38. You become who you spend your time with.

                                                                              39. Be stubborn about your goals and flexible about your methods.

                                                                                40. Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard.

                                                                                  41. If you don’t build your dreams, someone else will hire you to build theirs.

                                                                                    42. Between stimulus and response is our greatest power –the freedom to choose.

                                                                                    Advertising

                                                                                      43. What comes easy won’t last, what lasts won’t come easy.

                                                                                        44. Don’t limit your challenges, challenge your limits.

                                                                                          45. Work until your idols become your rivals.

                                                                                            Quotes about money

                                                                                            46. Formal education will make you a living. Self-education will make you a fortune.

                                                                                              47. I create new enemies every day, it’s called business.

                                                                                                48. When you have a Million Dollar vision, don’t surround yourself with 1 cent minds.

                                                                                                  49. You can’t get rich thinking poor.

                                                                                                    50. Doing what is comfortable is rarely profitable.

                                                                                                      51. If you can count your money, work harder.

                                                                                                        If you find yourself feeling lost and frustrated, it’s never too late to change things up. Check out this guide:

                                                                                                        How to Start Over and Reboot Your Life When It Seems Too Late

                                                                                                        Read Next