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10 Reasons Why Everyone Should Travel Alone At Least Once In A Lifetime

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10 Reasons Why Everyone Should Travel Alone At Least Once In A Lifetime

What if changing your life, and discovering who you truly are, is as simple as getting on a plane?

If you knew only three steps separated you from finding your true love or your true calling, would you risk taking the first step?

For many, traveling alone is that first step and the Internet is teeming with stories that bear witness to the life-changing power of traveling the road solo.

Here’s why you should experience solo traveling at least once in your lifetime.

1. You will be inspired to live a story worth telling.

Most people settle for far too little adventure in their life, and they choose existing over truly living. But as Anna Quindlen says, “The life you’ve had doesn’t have to be the only life you have.”

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Nothing can remind you that you’re part of a much larger story than going solo.

2. You will learn there’s no Us and Them. There’s only We.

Everyone everywhere is essentially the same. We hope for the same things. We fear the same things. We want to love and be loved.

When you meet people you once viewed as “them” you realize that the differences between us are insignificant compared to what connects us.

3. You will expand your soul.

Most of our daily experience is confined to a finite, predictable pattern of places, people, and things. Pushing beyond our norm reveals a world is far more wonderful and unexpected than we realize.

Life begins at the edge of your comfort zone.

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4. You will own your experience for yourself.

No one can discover the world for you. You can read about other places, cultures, and people all you want, but you’re simply learning facts.

Truly experiencing life requires taking the ride yourself, firsthand. No one can live your life for you, and no else is to blame if you die unfulfilled.

5. You will learn to be more present.

The mind’s autopilot switches off when confronted with new situations and environments. The world comes into sharper focus when you have to pay attention.

Solo travel forces you to be aware and see the world around you, and not simply look at it passively.

6. You will gain new perspective.

We’re all accustomed to seeing only one side of any story: ours. Traveling alone opens you to experiencing daily life through another set of eyes.

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There is no better way to learn about your own culture than to see it from someone else’s view.

7. You will turn your new perspective into a new way of living.

Many solo travelers return home with a new paradigm of the world and the role they play in it. They can’t un-see or un-learn what they experienced, which changes not only how they see the world but how they live in it.

If you want to be ruined for the status quo forever, the shortest path is a solo trip.

8. You will find freedom.

Our culture attempts to define what is acceptable as a “normal” or “successful” life. Most people live the life they think is expected of them.

Traveling alone reminds you that you have a say in the matter, and that the prison of expectations you’re standing in is locked from the inside…and the key is in your pocket.

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9. You will learn to trust your intuition.

Modern technology puts a bottomless reservoir of data, facts, and figures at our fingertips. But it’s easy to use technology as a crutch.

Life isn’t about facts. It’s about knowing through direct experience and the most powerful tool that’s served man for over 10,000 years is instinct.

As you travel, you’ll sharpen your ability to read between the lines of situations and act with confidence.

10. You will realize that home can be anywhere.

Home isn’t a place, it’s a way of being fearlessly connected with yourself and others. It’s a moment when you’re willing to open your heart so others can truly see you.

And that can happen anywhere and everywhere.

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Featured photo credit: hipster modern stylish blonde man on rails in daily life via shutterstock.com

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Last Updated on November 18, 2021

10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

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10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

We all fall into the trap of judging a person’s character by their appearance. How wrong we are! All too often, the real character of the person only appears when some negative event hits them or you. Then you may see a toxic person emerging from the ruins and it is often a shock.

A truly frightening example is revealed in the book by O’Toole in Bowman called Dangerous Instincts: How Gut Instincts Betray Us. A perfectly respectable, charming, well dressed neighbor was found to have installed a torture chamber in his garage where he was systematically abusing kidnapped women. This is an extreme example, but it does show how we can be totally deceived by a person’s physical appearance, manners and behavior.

So, what can you do? You want to be able to assess personal qualities when you come into contact with colleagues, fresh acquaintances and new friends who might even become lifelong partners. You want to know if they are:

  • honest
  • reliable
  • competent
  • kind and compassionate
  • capable of taking the blame
  • able to persevere
  • modest and humble
  • pacific and can control anger.

The secret is to reserve judgment and take your time. Observe them in certain situations; look at how they react. Listen to them talking, joking, laughing, explaining, complaining, blaming, praising, ranting, and preaching. Only then will you be able to judge their character. This is not foolproof, but if you follow the 10 ways below, you have a pretty good chance of not ending up in an abusive relationship.

1. Is anger a frequent occurrence?

All too often, angry reactions which may seem to be excessive are a sign that there are underlying issues. Do not think that every person who just snaps and throws his/her weight around mentally and physically is just reacting normally. Everyone has an occasional angry outburst when driving or when things go pear-shaped.

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But if this is almost a daily occurrence, then you need to discover why and maybe avoid that person. Too often, anger will escalate to violent and aggressive behavior. You do not want to be near someone who thinks violence can solve personal or global problems.

2. Can you witness acts of kindness?

How often do you see this person being kind and considerate? Do they give money to beggars, donate to charity, do voluntary work or in some simple way show that they are willing to share the planet with about 7 billion other people?

I was shocked when a guest of mine never showed any kindness to the weak and disadvantaged people in our town. She was ostensibly a religious person, but I began to doubt the sincerity of her beliefs.

“The best index to a person’s character is how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and how he treats people who can’t fight back.”

Abigail Van Buren

3. How does this person take the blame?

Maybe you know that s/he is responsible for a screw-up in the office or even in not turning up on time for a date. Look at their reaction. If they start blaming other colleagues or the traffic, well, this is an indication that they are not willing to take responsibility for their mistakes.

4. Don’t use Facebook as an indicator.

You will be relieved to know that graphology (the study of that forgotten skill of handwriting) is no longer considered a reliable test of a person’s character. Neither is Facebook stalking, fortunately. A study showed that Facebook use of foul language, sexual innuendo and gossip were not reliable indicators of a candidate’s character or future performance in the workplace.

5. Read their emails.

Now a much better idea is to read the person’s emails. Studies show that the use of the following can indicate certain personality traits:

  • Too many exclamation points may reveal a sunny disposition
  • Frequent errors may indicate apathy
  • Use of smileys is the only way a person can smile at you
  • Use of the third person may reveal a certain formality
  • Too many question marks can show anger
  • Overuse of capital letters is regarded as shouting. They are a definite no-no in netiquette, yet a surprising number of  people still use them.

6. Watch out for the show offs.

Listen to people as they talk. How often do they mention their achievements, promotions, awards and successes? If this happens a lot, it is a sure indication that this person has an over-inflated view of his/her achievements. They are unlikely to be modest or show humility. What a pity!  Another person to avoid.

7. Look for evidence of perseverance.

A powerful indicator of grit and tenacity is when a person persists and never gives up when they really want to achieve a life goal. Look for evidence of them keeping going in spite of enormous difficulties.

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Great achievements by scientists and inventors all bear the hallmark of perseverance. We only have to think of Einstein, Edison (who failed thousands of times) and Nelson Mandela to get inspiration. The US Department of Education is in no doubt about how grit, tenacity and perseverance will be key success factors for youth in the 21st century.

8. Their empathy score is high.

Listen to how they talk about the less fortunate members of our society such as the poor, immigrants and the disabled. Do you notice that they talk in a compassionate way about these people? The fact that they even mention them is a strong indicator of empathy.

People with zero empathy will never talk about the disadvantaged. They will rarely ask you a question about a difficult time or relationship. They will usually steer the conversation back to themselves. These people have zero empathy and in extreme cases, they are psychopaths who never show any feelings towards their victims.

9. Learn how to be socially interactive.

We are social animals and this is what makes us so uniquely human. If a person is isolated or a loner, this may be a negative indicator of their character. You want to meet a person who knows about trust, honesty and loyalty. The only way to practice these great qualities is to actually interact socially. The great advantage is that you can share problems and celebrate success and joy together.

“One can acquire everything in solitude, except character.”

Stendhal

 10. Avoid toxic people.

These people are trying to control others and often are failing to come to terms with their own failures. Typical behavior and conversations may concern:

  • Envy or jealousy
  • Criticism of partners, colleagues and friends
  • Complaining about their own lack of success
  • Blaming others for their own bad luck or failure
  • Obsession with themselves and their problems

Listen to these people talk and you will quickly discover that you need to avoid them at all costs because their negativity will drag you down. In addition, as much as you would like to help them, you are not qualified to do so.

Now, having looked at some of the best ways to judge a person, what about yourself? How do others see you? Why not take Dr. Phil’s quiz and find out. Can you bear it?

Featured photo credit: Jacek Dylag via unsplash.com

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