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10 Mistakes to Stop Making Now to Avoid Lifelong Regrets

10 Mistakes to Stop Making Now to Avoid Lifelong Regrets

When people look back on their lives, what are some of the most common regrets they have? That is a profound question we need to stop and ask more often. Some people look back and say the biggest mistake they made was to not have children. Others look back and say their biggest regret was about lost time. Whatever the case, it’s important to look at how you are living your life and think about how you can avoid future regrets. Many mistakes we make that lead to regret later in life are avoidable. Here are a few of the most common mistakes you need to stop making now to avoid regrets later on in life.

1. Following someone else’s dream.

The pain of unfulfilled dreams is more severe than that of disappointments. Twenty, 30 or 40 years from now you will not think about how disappointing you were to your parents for not following the career path they chose for you as much as you will regret not pursuing your own true life passions. Do yourself a favor and stop living for other people’s dreams. Live your own life. It is your life after all, isn’t it?

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2. Taking your loved ones for granted.

Your kids won’t be kids forever. If you don’t enjoy them when they are young, soon they will be grown-ups and the opportunity will be gone forever. Your parents also won’t live forever. You will be hard pressed to forgive yourself for not telling and showing them how much they meant to you when they are gone. Spend quality time with everyone you love.

3. Pretending to be someone you’re not.

Society expects us to act and do things in certain ways. While it’s easy to succumb to the pressures of society, don’t change so that people will like you. Don’t live your whole life pretending to be someone you aren’t just to fit in. Be yourself. The most admirable and inspiring people in this world are their true selves. When you are yourself, you are comfortable. You attract like-minded people who love you for who you are, and who will help you live the most fulfilling life you can.

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4. Burning all your bridges.

As the old adage says, be kind to the people you meet on your way up, because you might need them on your way down. You might not want to hear this, but life is a journey of ups and down. Today you might be riding the waves of success in your personal and professional life, but who knows what tomorrow holds. Don’t burn those bridges in your past that helped you get to where you are now, including past friendships, networks and relationships. You might need them later in life.

5. Telling lies all the time.

Some people tell lies so easily and readily that is has become second nature to them. What these people don’t realize until it is too late is that lies destroy families and relationships, often permanently. True relationships cannot be held together by lies. Tell lies and you will inevitably regret it later in life. Tell the truth and you will never have to look back with remorse and regret for lies told.

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6. Forgetting to live in the moment.

Life is fleeting. Don’t get caught up in the mad rush of modern living and forget to enjoy those little moments that make life worth it, such as your baby’s first steps or your daughter’s graduation. Quit working too much and learn to appreciate your surroundings and the people in your life. There is nothing worse than reaching your goals and discovering you don’t know how you got there.

7. Giving up true love.

Love is a big area of regret for many people. Too many times people reject real love because they are scared of it, don’t recognize it, or are too busy pursuing other things. Denying yourself the opportunity to love and be loved is denying yourself the one real thing that can make life worth living. Accept pure love from everyone and give it generously to all. If you are lucky to find true romantic love, cherish it and protect it as fervently as you can. We all come to think about our love experiences decades later. Don’t let this be an area of regret in your life.

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8. Denying others happiness.

Do good to all and spread happiness. It adds value to your own life and makes other people truly grateful. When you are old and look back, you will smile and be happy for showing kindness and helping other people be the best they can be. That orphaned child you helped get through school, for example, will come visit you when she is all grown up and it will fill your soul with joy and happiness. In the end, it is not how much money or how many material possessions you have accumulated that count, but how many lives you have touched.

9. Not standing up for yourself and others.

There are many injustices in this world. These injustices continue because not enough of the good guys stand up for what is right. Never stand by and watch passively as an injustice takes place. Stand up for yourself and for others bravely. It is better to die for a good cause, than live for no cause or a bad cause. When you are older, you will take pride that you participated in making the world a better place for all and did not just sit passively as bad things happened around you.

10. Disregarding your health and wellness.

Your health is your life. Never disregard it. Take care of yourself religiously. Eat right and exercise regularly. Don’t be one of those people who only think about their health when there is a problem and they are feeling unwell. You might not get better for you to take better care of your health.

Featured photo credit: Regret/Neil Moralee via flickr.com

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David K. William

David is a publisher and entrepreneur. He is also the founding editor of Web Writer Spotlight.

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Last Updated on September 17, 2018

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.

Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.

When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).

Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:

1. You’re depressed about your home life.

No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.

However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.

If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.

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When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.

You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.

2. You aren’t comfortable being yourself.

Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.

If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.

You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.

If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.

3. You can’t stop snooping.

Mutual trust is necessary in any relationship. The only way to get that trust is with respect.

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I can find you anywhere online, no matter how private and secure you think you are. The odds of you having a password I can’t crack are slim. If we’ve met in person, I could install a remote key logger on your device without even touching it.

Finding your information online hardly takes a clandestine organization. Any idiot with a Wi-Fi-enabled device can cyberstalk you. I’m just the only idiot in the village admitting it.

So now that we know everyone snoops, it’s time to address your personal habits. Governments snoop because they don’t trust us. If you’re snooping on your partner, it’s because you don’t trust them.

It’s ok to have doubts, and it’s perfectly normal to look into anything that looks weird, but keep in mind that data collection is only half of an investigation.

If you find yourself constantly snooping and questioning everything, clearly there’s a trust issue and the relationship likely needs to end.

4. You’re afraid of commitment.

If you’ve been dating longer than a year and you aren’t engaged, it’s never going to happen.

Commitment is important. People will come up with a million ways to describe why they can’t be committed.

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No matter who you are if you like it, you need to put a ring on it. Find an engagement ring, stick a gemstone in it and marry the person. If you’re not legally able to get married or you don’t believe in it for one reason or another, have a child (or adopt one, however you’re able to) or treat your partner’s family like your own. It’s a huge financial and mental commitment.

If you’re not ready for one or the other after some time, don’t waste anymore of your precious life on the relationship.

Your relationship should be something that propels you forward. If it’s not going anywhere, make it an open relationship and call it what it is—dating multiple people.

5. You imagine a happier life without your partner.

If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.

Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.

Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.

Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.

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If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?

6. You resent, rather than love your partner.

When a relationship starts to crumble, you begin to resent your partner for all the things you once loved about him or her.

When you’ve reached this point, your partner has reached at least No. 2 on this list. From your partner’s perspective, your unhappiness with them is picked up as bashing them for being who they are.

If you’re both unhappy in the relationship, it’s better if it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.

7. You chase past feelings.

It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.

You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.

When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.

Final thoughts

If you’re feeling stuck in your current relationship, it’s time to reflect about it with your partner. Don’t ignore these signs of an unhappy relationship as they will slowly go worse and harm both you and your partner in long-term.

Featured photo credit: josh peterson via unsplash.com

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