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The Little Things That Matter In Every Relationship

The Little Things That Matter In Every Relationship

In this self-centered world, it’s hard to keep a romantic relationship going strong. Break-ups happen often for no reason at all, or a reason that could have been overcome if only there was a will to do so. Sometimes, it’s the small things that keeps a couple together for a long time.  Here are 10 little things that matter in every relationship.

Say it!

We mean the “I love you” sentence.  If you feel it, say it.  Take your significant other by the hands, look them deep into their eyes, and say it.  A smile is sure to appear on their face.  Three little words that can light up both your days and remind them of how much they are loved.

Watch a romantic movie.

Simple but effective. There are plenty of romantic movies out there to see, but personally, I’d suggest you skip Hollywood movies and focus on European ones. Why? They are not Cinderella like, they have real-life situations and they can be pretty interesting. My favorites are these two.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8I4S4n2Meh4

Be silly together

Letting your inhibitions go and being childlike is something that can easily be forgotten when you’re an adult and especially when you’re a couple.  Being silly together shows that you are comfortable with each other, that you have embraced one another and could be a great reminder why you fell for each other in the first place.  A couple who can laugh and play together is a happy one.

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Say thank you 

It’s not hard to say thank you.

But we don’t mean the default “thank you” such as when someone brings you a cup of coffee. We mean a “thank you” for the things that really matter.  When they hold your hand through a crisis, when they lift you up when you fall, when they stay by your side when you’re ill. In those situations gratitude is rarely expressed with words, but can go a long way to make the other person feel special and cared for.

Compliments

Compliments are wonderful. It’s an instant lift when someone acknowledges you in a positive light, especially when it’s coming from someone you love.  It shows that you’re noticed, appreciated and admired.  Complimenting your partner on their looks, their personality, their positive spirit or whatever else you admire or love about them is something you can’t do too much of.  It’s a small gesture that can make a huge, positive impact on your relationship.

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Do what the significant other enjoy

If he likes to watch sports, watch with him and cheer on his favorite team.  Listen and take interest in what your partner likes to do, even if it’s not your personal favorite.  In turn, when you want to do an activity that you enjoy, they’ll be open and willing to do it with you as well.  Going outside of your comfort zone and sitting through an opera or ballet for the simple fact that she enjoys it, speaks volumes to your significant other.  It’s a small gesture that shows you want to be with them and that you go out of your way to see them happy in their element.

Travel together

Did you know that some couples don’t travel together before their honeymoon? It may come as a big surprise to realize that you’re not comfortable traveling with each other after years and years of relationship, and that’s normal, but there’s a cure.

Start now. When you find yourself far away from the place you live in, you have only each other to rely on, you will spend more time together- just the two of you, and you will create memories.  If you can’t afford a big vacation, try doing a ‘staycation’ and explore cities and sights around you that are nearby.  Whether or not it turns out to be a great vacation, it will give you both a shared experience and something to talk about that will bring you closer.

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A little present goes a long way

It doesn’t have to be expensive or elaborate, in fact, it can be the simple act of getting them their favorite ice cream on the way home because you know they had a long, hard day at work.  It’s not the present but the gesture and the thought that went into it that will be appreciated more so than the actual ‘thing’ you got them.  Have they been talking about getting a certain book or waiting to see a certain movie?  Buy that book when it comes out or make a date for the day the movie opens, not only will they be happy but they’ll know that you listen to them and you care.

Cuddle

Cuddling is the best way to show that you love someone. Cuddling has this wonderful ability to soothe away the pain and calm you down.  It works both ways. Not only will your partner feel relaxed, but you will shake off some of that everyday stress. And when it’s cold, you could keep each other warm.

Take their side in an argument

This is more important than you think. You should always back your partner up when they are having a brawl, even if you think that they are not in the right. You must never leave them standing on their own in an argument. At the very least, you should try and bring the argument to an end. That way they will know that you have their back, that they can rely on you and that you love them. This is a little thing that makes a BIG difference.

Some of these advice you know already. Some of these are new to you, but trust us, they come from years of experience, and they really work. Let us know your thoughts.

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Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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