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10 Biggest Relationship Mistakes Most Men Make

10 Biggest Relationship Mistakes Most Men Make

When a relationship goes wrong it’s usually because both parties are to blame. You may have read otherwise but when one person does something wrong it inspires bad behavior in the other person and vice versa. To all of the men out there, you can’t change people but you can fix the issues that you’re causing and hope that it motivates your partner to fix theirs too. Here are some of the biggest relationship mistakes most men make.

1. You don’t give her enough gifts

This is a common one. After a while it’s hard to drive up the motivation to get your partner something special. Money may be tight or you may not think about it anymore because you have slid into that routine that all couples get into eventually. There is absolutely no point in any relationship where the woman or man in your life doesn’t like getting something nice.

2. You give her the wrong gifts

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relationship mistakes

    It’s just as bad to give her the wrong gifts. It is a frequent occurrence that men will get their partner a gift that the man actually wants but wants to disguise it as a gift for her or for both of them. After a very short period of time (if you’re paying attention) you will know what kind of stuff she likes. Stay within those defined lines unless otherwise notified. If she likes cloths and shoes and you buy her a pool tarp, you are doing it wrong.

    3. You don’t understand her

    People are like snowflakes. They are all different and that makes them infinitely more difficult to understand. That makes this a more common problem than many men will admit. If you’re having problems figuring her out then you should probably sit down and ask her some questions. If you’ve been trying this long and have failed, it’s probably not a good idea to base your relationship on the idea that you’ll eventually just understand her.

    4. You’re scared or intimidated by her

    Don’t get us wrong. Women can be scary. They can be very scary. That doesn’t mean that they’ll sit there and take you being scared of them. When you’re in a relationship, you’re in a partnership. If the woman feels like you’re only around because you’re too scared to do what you really want then she’ll get rid of you and find someone who isn’t afraid to show her how he feels.

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    5. You put something else before her

    This is pretty self-explanatory. No person ever likes it when their significant other puts work, another person, or anything else before them. You had better believe she has a running tally of how many times you’ve blown off a dinner date because of work or because of your friends. We’re not saying you can’t have a job, friends, or interests but when push comes to shove you’d better make sure she knows she matters the most.

    6. You don’t pay enough attention to her feelings

    When a woman in a relationship is angry, she may not show it like a normal person. If she’s jealous, suspicious, or otherwise unhappy then you’re looking at pretty much the same predicament. Unfortunately it’s your job to figure it out because what she’s doing is essentially testing you. If you notice that something is off you are rewarded with her telling you the problem and giving you and opportunity to fix it. If you let it go, she’ll do the same to you.

    7. You pay way too much attention to her feelings

    If you’re asking her what the problem is every other day or every day then you’re probably looking too far into things. It’s touching and sweet at first but rest assured it’ll start getting annoying. Soon her problem will be you and we both know what happens when you’re the problem in a relationship.

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    8. You don’t inspire trust

    Online affairs relationship mistakes

      As far as I’m concerned, this is the most important item on the list. If you can’t get her to trust you then you have messed up pretty bad. The rest of these are issues that are easily overcome but trust is something that’ll likely be lost forever. It’s a fragile feeling and it’s easy to shatter trust. It doesn’t have to be cheating or outward lying either. If you’re sending messages to another woman on Facebook and they could even remotely be construed as suggestive, then you better hope she never finds out. If she does, it’s game over. The best way to inspire trust and the best way to maintain it is to simply not do anything that could destroy it.

      9. You’re too clingy or wishy washy

      Women love a man who is around frequently but if you’re attached to her hip she’s going to learn to dislike it when you’re around. If she wanted an animal that hugged her leg all day long she’d have kids or get a dog. She needs a partner and especially one that knows how to give her space when she needs it. Also, don’t be too wishy washy. If you have to ask if you’re being too wishy washy then you’re probably being too wishy washy. You can love someone without turning into a total pansy.

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      10. You don’t talk to her enough

      One of the reasons you’re even in a relationship is so you don’t have to go through life alone. If you’re not talking to your partner then why do you have one? Sit down on a frequent basis and talk to the woman. Ask her about her day, tell her about your dreams, and discuss things you guys have in common. She’s not just a person you have sex with, she’s your best friend and partner in crime. If the communication is weak then the relationship is weak.

      Now women, a lot of these can apply to you too. Getting your man that pink, Hello Kitty t-shirt may be fun for you but he has to go out in public in that thing. Sending even remotely suggestive messages to that guy on Facebook and hiding it from your man can inspire just as much distrust as when he does it to you. Frankly, we probably could have taken the gender identifier out of this and made it the relationship mistakes that everyone makes. However, this is for you men out there. If you have a problem, fix it and hope that it encourages your partner to do the same.

      Featured photo credit: A Cartoon Christmas via acartoonchristmas.com

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      Last Updated on September 17, 2018

      7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

      7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

      Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.

      Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.

      When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).

      Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:

      1. You’re depressed about your home life.

      No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.

      However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.

      If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.

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      When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.

      You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.

      2. You aren’t comfortable being yourself.

      Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.

      If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.

      You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.

      If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.

      3. You can’t stop snooping.

      Mutual trust is necessary in any relationship. The only way to get that trust is with respect.

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      I can find you anywhere online, no matter how private and secure you think you are. The odds of you having a password I can’t crack are slim. If we’ve met in person, I could install a remote key logger on your device without even touching it.

      Finding your information online hardly takes a clandestine organization. Any idiot with a Wi-Fi-enabled device can cyberstalk you. I’m just the only idiot in the village admitting it.

      So now that we know everyone snoops, it’s time to address your personal habits. Governments snoop because they don’t trust us. If you’re snooping on your partner, it’s because you don’t trust them.

      It’s ok to have doubts, and it’s perfectly normal to look into anything that looks weird, but keep in mind that data collection is only half of an investigation.

      If you find yourself constantly snooping and questioning everything, clearly there’s a trust issue and the relationship likely needs to end.

      4. You’re afraid of commitment.

      If you’ve been dating longer than a year and you aren’t engaged, it’s never going to happen.

      Commitment is important. People will come up with a million ways to describe why they can’t be committed.

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      No matter who you are if you like it, you need to put a ring on it. Find an engagement ring, stick a gemstone in it and marry the person. If you’re not legally able to get married or you don’t believe in it for one reason or another, have a child (or adopt one, however you’re able to) or treat your partner’s family like your own. It’s a huge financial and mental commitment.

      If you’re not ready for one or the other after some time, don’t waste anymore of your precious life on the relationship.

      Your relationship should be something that propels you forward. If it’s not going anywhere, make it an open relationship and call it what it is—dating multiple people.

      5. You imagine a happier life without your partner.

      If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.

      Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.

      Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.

      Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.

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      If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?

      6. You resent, rather than love your partner.

      When a relationship starts to crumble, you begin to resent your partner for all the things you once loved about him or her.

      When you’ve reached this point, your partner has reached at least No. 2 on this list. From your partner’s perspective, your unhappiness with them is picked up as bashing them for being who they are.

      If you’re both unhappy in the relationship, it’s better if it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.

      7. You chase past feelings.

      It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.

      You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.

      When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.

      Final thoughts

      If you’re feeling stuck in your current relationship, it’s time to reflect about it with your partner. Don’t ignore these signs of an unhappy relationship as they will slowly go worse and harm both you and your partner in long-term.

      Featured photo credit: josh peterson via unsplash.com

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