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10 Fun Relationship Quizzes to Strengthen Your Bond with Your Partner

10 Fun Relationship Quizzes to Strengthen Your Bond with Your Partner

Do you remember the early days of your relationship when you were star stuck at each other? Do you remember how you sat staring at each other dreamily, fantasizing about your future?

Do you recall how you talked about everything: your similarities, differences, goals, and visions? Remember how easy it was to ask each other probing questions? Can you recall how close and connected you felt to your beloved?

And yet, if you are like most couples, the honeymoon phase of your relationship waned and the curiosity was replaced by gripes about work, exchanges about chores and plans for the many responsibilities that you now both shoulder.

There is nothing inherently wrong with your relationship. However, lack of deeply engaging dialogue with your partner is slowly weakening your emotional intimacy: the very backbone of your relationship.

Dr. John Gottman says that successful couples are intimately familiar with each other’s worlds.[1] To keep the connection between you and your partner alive, you must always prioritize the discovery and cultivation of each other’s internal world.

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If you want to increase the intimacy in your relationship, create some weekly time for quizzes. Quizzes help you to explore and understand your partner’s internal world in a fun way, consequently increasing your intimacy.

The following quizzes will help you to initiate deep conversations to help you support and strengthen emotional intimacy with your partner.

1. Quizzes on Books

The books we read say a lot about us: the genres we choose, the scenes that linger in our minds, the characters we admire… finding out your partner’s impressions on the books they have been reading is a great way of learning more about them.

  1. Is there any book that made the biggest impression on you as a teenager?
  2. What book has influenced your life the most?
  3. Which romantic literary couple do you think we are and why?
  4. What famous writer alive or dead would you want to write your story?
  5. What scene from a novel that you have read is still vivid in your mind?
  6. If you could bring one fictional character that you read about to life, who would it be and why?
  7. If someone wrote a biography about you, what do you think the title should be?
  8. If you found yourself stranded on a deserted island, what four books would you take and why?

2. Quizzes on Technology

Technology has wholly permeated relationships. Research shows that you pick your smartphone 85 times a day and you are probably online 25 hours per week.[2]

Gadgets have become extensions of us. Technology, therefore, becomes an appropriate subject as you seek to know your partner even better and improve the connection of your relationship.

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  1. What was your favorite game to play as a child?
  2. Which phone apps are you obsessed with?
  3. How do you feel about emojis? Which one do you love to use and why?
  4. What is your phone’s wallpaper and what does it signify?
  5. If you had to go for a week without a TV, your phone or computer, which one would you choose?
  6. What is the best Wi-Fi name you have seen?
  7. If life were a video game, what would some of the cheat codes be?
  8. What is your favorite viral YouTube video?

3. Quizzes on Fame

The famous serve as both an object of worship and disgust for us, simultaneously representing what we strive to be, and what we dislike about ourselves.[3]

Knowing how your partner feels about celebrity life helps you understand their principles and morals a little bit better.

  1. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
  2. Who is the most famous person you have ever met?
  3. If you were a president for a day, what would you change about the country?
  4. Given the choice of anyone in the world, who would you want as a dinner guest?
  5. You have your own late night talk show. Who do you invite as your first guest?
  6. What was your childhood actor/actress crush?
  7. What celebrity would you rate as a perfect 10?
  8. Who in your opinion are some real heroes?

4. Quizzes on Your Relationship

Reflecting on your relationship helps you strengthen your connection.[4] Sometimes, it is easy to assume that you and your partner are on the same page while you are not.

Questions about your relationship provide you with a well-rounded view of your relationship and where it is going.

  1. What is the one thing I do that makes you feel loved the most?
  2. What does the perfect relationship look like to you? What is our relationship missing to be that perfect?
  3. Do you have trouble opening up and talking to me about anything?
  4. Is there anything I can do for you at this moment to help you feel more comfortable or loved?
  5. Is there any argument we have had recently that you feel incomplete about?
  6. Are there any areas of our relationship that you have felt especially challenging?
  7. What are the times you feel our souls connecting the most?
  8. What new traditions or rituals are you excited about creating in our family?

5. Quizzes on Your Past

There is nothing like the early days of a relationship. However, as responsibilities grow, you find that you slowly settle into duties and intimacy has taken the back burner.

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Revisiting the early days of your relationship is a great way to reconnect with your partner all over again. You also discover new ways to effortlessly reconnect with your beloved whenever you feel that you need it.

  1. What do you remember thinking to yourself the first time you saw me?
  2. What qualities first attracted you to me?
  3. What is your favorite date we ever had?
  4. When did you know that you were in love with me?
  5. What are your happiest memories of our early days together? What made it so special for you?
  6. When did you first think that we could make it as a couple?
  7. What is your favorite sexual memory of us?
  8. How did you know that you wanted to be with me?

6. Quizzes on Secrets

This quiz helps you and your partner to not only know each other better but to gain a new appreciation of each other.

  1. What is the weirdest dream you have ever had?
  2. What is the weirdest scar you have and how did you get it?
  3. Tell me what you consider the most difficult challenge in your life before meeting me? What are you grateful for about the challenge and what did you learn?
  4. What is a question about life that you wish you had the answer to?
  5. What are you dreading in life right now?
  6. What is the thing that you have struggled with the most your entire life? Who knows about it? Why do you think you struggle with it? What can I do to help you overcome it?
  7. If you had to be on life support, would you want to be kept alive?
  8. What do you consider your biggest failure? What did you learn from that experience?

7. Quizzes on Money

Money is t he most common cause of conflict in many relationships.[5] Taking quizzes about money will help you balance out your relationship financially and increase your emotional connection.

  1. How do feel about supporting family members financially?
  2. What if one or more of our parents needed to be taken care of, would you be okay if they lived with us?
  3. If money was not an issue, what would you really be doing with your life?
  4. Are you stressed about our finances? What is the biggest worry you have about our finances?
  5. How do you think we should prepare for financial emergencies?
  6. What do you think we can do to earn extra income?
  7. How much debt is acceptable or unacceptable to you?
  8. Are you ok with the way we are handling our finances? What do you think we should do differently?

8. Quizzes on Trust

We all know that trust is a fundamental component of every healthy relationship. The following questions will give your relationship a boost and leave you feeling much more secure.

  1. What scares you most about our relationship?
  2. How have I behaved that has made you feel unnoticed?
  3. Have I made you feel lonely?
  4. Have I done anything to make you feel unappreciated?
  5. What can I do to show you that I am there for you?
  6. Have you ever felt rejected by me? When did it happen?
  7. What have I done that has made you feel insecure?
  8. How can we make our relationship affair – proof?

9. Quizzes on Sex

One of the main distinguishing factors between the relationship with your partner and other relationships in your life is that you are having sex. And yet, sex ha s been ranked among the first three things that couples hardly discuss.[6]

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A quiz about sex will help you and your partner establish your level of satisfaction with your sex life and to determine what you need to do to ensure you are both sexually fulfilled.

  1. What do I do that turns you on?
  2. What body part do you like best about me?
  3. What is the boldest sexual thing you have ever done?
  4. What is the weirdest thing you want to indulge in?
  5. What do you love about our sex life?
  6. Which part of your body would you like me to pay more attention to during sex?
  7. What is the one place you would like us to have sex, but we have not yet?
  8. How do you feel after we have sex? What would you like to do after sex?

The sense of trust that will come from your brave vulnerability could be one of the most powerful things to happen to you as a couple.

10. Five Things ……Go!

This is a simple, quick quiz that you can do anywhere, anytime. When your partner calls out a topic, you will both go through five things around the subject. For instance, you can cover:

  1. Five things that you love that your partner has done for you lately.
  2. Five things that you are grateful for in your life.
  3. Five things you want to do with your partner in the next month.
  4. Five things that inspire you about your partner
  5. Five things you love about your partner

The versatility and playfulness of this quiz make it a total winner. Be creative to make the exercise fun.

Final Thoughts

Quizzes are a great way to strengthen the connection in your relationship. Remember, even though you love each other, your relationship does not run on autopilot.

Your relationship will only thrive if you intentionally put effort into it. And yes, you can get by just fine without doing any of the suggested quizzes, but giving a few of them a try could take your relationship to the next level.

Featured photo credit: NeONBRAND via unsplash.com

Reference

More by this author

Randy Skilton

Randy is an educator in the areas of relationships and self-help.

Do Rebound Relationships Work Out? Why They Will and Won’t How to Improve Communication in Relationships and Increase Intimacy What Defines a Good Relationship? 13 Tips on How to Foster One How to Set Marriage Goals That Make Your Relationship Stronger 10 Fun Relationship Quizzes to Strengthen Your Bond with Your Partner

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Last Updated on September 18, 2020

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

For the original article by Celestine: 13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

“We all have problems. The way we solve them is what makes us different.” ~Unknown

“It’s not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” – Hans Selye

Have you ever experienced moments when things just don’t go your way? For example, losing your keys, accidentally spilling your drink, waking up late, missing your buses/trains, forgetting to bring your things, and so on?

You’re not alone. All of us, myself included, experience times when things don’t go as we expect.

Here is my guide on how to deal with daily setbacks.

1. Take a step back and evaluate

When something bad happens, take a step back and evaluate the situation. Some questions to ask yourself:

  1. What is the problem?
  2. Are you the only person facing this problem in the world today?
  3. How does this problem look like at an individual level? A national level? On a global scale?
  4. What’s the worst possible thing that can happen to you as a result of this?
  5. How is it going to impact your life in the next 1 year? 5 years? 10 years?

Doing this exercise is not to undermine the problem or disclaiming responsibility, but to consider different perspectives, so you can adopt the best approach for it. Most problems we encounter daily may seem like huge issues when they crop up, but most, if not all, don’t have much impact in our life beyond that day.

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2. Vent if you have to, but don’t linger on the problem

If you feel very frustrated and need to let off some steam, go ahead and do that. Talk to a friend, complain, crib about it, or scream at the top of your lungs if it makes you happy.

At the same time, don’t get caught up with venting. While venting may temporarily relieve yourself, it’s not going to solve the problem ultimately. You don’t want to be an energy vampire.

Vent if there’s a need to, but do it for 15 to 20 minutes. Then move on.

3. Realize there are others out there facing this too

Even though the situation may be frustrating, you’re not alone. Remember there are almost 7 billion people in the world today, and chances are that other people have faced the same thing before too. Knowing it’s not just you helps you to get out of a self-victimizing mindset.

4. Process your thoughts/emotions

Process your thoughts/emotions with any of the four methods:

  1. Journal. Write your unhappiness in a private diary or in your blog. It doesn’t have to be formal at all – it can be a brain dump on rough paper or new word document. Delete after you are done.
  2. Audio taping. Record yourself as you talk out what’s on your mind. Tools include tape recorder, your PC (Audacity is a freeware for recording/editing audio) and your mobile (most mobiles today have audio recording functions). You can even use your voice mail for this. Just talking helps you to gain awareness of your emotions. After recording, play back and listen to what you said. You might find it quite revealing.
  3. Meditation. At its simplest form, meditation is just sitting/lying still and observing your reality as it is – including your thoughts and emotions. Some think that it involves some complex mambo-jumbo, but it doesn’t.
  4. Talking to someone. Talking about it with someone helps you work through the issue. It also gets you an alternate viewpoint and consider it from a different angle.

5. Acknowledge your thoughts

Don’t resist your thoughts, but acknowledge them. This includes both positive and negative thoughts.

By acknowledging, I mean recognizing these thoughts exist. So if say, you have a thought that says, “Wow, I’m so stupid!”, acknowledge that. If you have a thought that says, “I can’t believe this is happening to me again”, acknowledge that as well.

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Know that acknowledging the thoughts doesn’t mean you agree with them. It’s simply recognizing the existence of said thoughts so that you can stop resisting yourself and focus on the situation on hand.

6. Give yourself a break

If you’re very stressed out by the situation, and the problem is not time sensitive, then give yourself a break. Take a walk, listen to some music, watch a movie, or get some sleep. When you’re done, you should feel a lot more revitalized to deal with the situation.

7. Uncover what you’re really upset about

A lot of times, the anger we feel isn’t about the world. You may start off feeling angry at someone or something, but at the depth of it, it’s anger toward yourself.

Uncover the root of your anger. I have written a five part anger management series on how to permanently overcome anger.

After that, ask yourself: How can you improve the situation? Go to Step #9, where you define your actionable steps. Our anger comes from not having control on the situation. Sitting there and feeling infuriated is not going to change the situation. The more action we take, the more we will regain control over the situation, the better we will feel.

8. See this as an obstacle to be overcome

As Helen Keller once said,

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”

Whatever you’re facing right now, see it as an obstacle to be overcome. In every worthy endeavor, there’ll always be countless obstacles that emerge along the way. These obstacles are what separate the people who make it, and those who don’t. If you’re able to push through and overcome them, you’ll emerge a stronger person than before. It’ll be harder for anything to get you down in the future.

9. Analyze the situation – Focus on actionable steps

In every setback, there are going to be things that can’t be reversed since they have already occurred. You want to focus on things that can still be changed (salvageable) vs. things that have already happened and can’t be changed. The only time the situation changes is when you take steps to improve it. Rather than cry over spilt milk, work through your situation:

  1. What’s the situation?
  2. What’s stressing you about this situation?
  3. What are the next steps that’ll help you resolve them?
  4. Take action on your next steps!

After you have identified your next steps, act on them. The key here is to focus on the actionable steps, not the inactionable steps. It’s about regaining control over the situation through direct action.

10. Identify how it occurred (so it won’t occur again next time)

A lot of times we react to our problems. The problem occurs, and we try to make the best out of what has happened within the context. While developing a healthy coping mechanism is important (which is what the other helping points are on), it’s also equally important, if not more, to understand how the problem arose. This way, you can work on preventing it from taking place next time, vs. dealing reactively with it.

Most of us probably think the problem is outside of our control, but reality is most of the times it’s fully preventable. It’s just a matter of how much responsibility you take over the problem.

For example, for someone who can’t get a cab for work in the morning, he/she may see the problem as a lack of cabs in the country, or bad luck. However, if you trace to the root of the problem, it’s probably more to do with (a) Having unrealistic expectations of the length of time to get a cab. He/she should budget more time for waiting for a cab next time. (b) Oversleeping, because he/she was too tired from working late the previous day. He/she should allocate enough time for rest next time. He/she should also pick up better time management skills, so as to finish work in lesser time.

11. Realize the situation can be a lot worse

No matter how bad the situation is, it can always be much worse. A plus point vs. negative point analysis will help you realize that.

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12. Do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it

No matter how bad your situation may seem, do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it. Life is too beautiful to worry so much over daily issues. Take a step back (#1), give yourself a break if you need to (#6), and do what you can within your means (#9). Everything else will unfold accordingly. Worrying too much about the outcome isn’t going to change things or make your life any better.

13. Pick out the learning points from the encounter

There’s something to learn from every encounter. What have you learned from this situation? What lessons have you taken away?

After you identify your learning points, think about how you’re going to apply them moving forward. With this, you’ve clearly gained something from this encounter. You’ve walked away a stronger, wiser, better person, with more life lessons to draw from in the future.

Get the manifesto version of this article: [Manifesto] What To Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way

Featured photo credit: Alice Donovan Rouse via unsplash.com

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