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Others May Doubt You, But You Always Have To Believe In Yourself

Others May Doubt You, But You Always Have To Believe In Yourself

You have a clear vision of what your dream job is and what you want to do in your life. You feel exhilarated and you are looking forward to getting up every day and going to work knowing it will be a joyful experience. But you get a slap in the face when your parents, your close family, and everyone who deems themselves as more experienced than you start questioning your choices and doubting your abilities. They will try to persuade you to give up on silly dreams and find a “real life” job that will put food on the table. Nobody can live off their dreams, right?

Don’t let anyone convince you that you can’t be happy with the choices you make.

It’s a very common situation for our parents, and other people from the older generations, to doubt our choices when it comes to important decisions in life. They feel they know more since they’ve been here longer than we have. And they feel it’s their right to question our choices and to lead us to what they think is the right path.

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When loved ones don’t show us support in realizing our dreams, we can get depressed and start questioning what is right. “It’s really foolish of me thinking that I can be well off doing that job,” you might start thinking. Never let anyone instill a seed of doubt into your mind – we are all different, and nobody knows what’s best for you except yourself. You should be very aware of what you can achieve and confident in moving towards that goal. Don’t be afraid of failure, it can be the source of the most valuable lessons we get in life. When that happens, look on the bright side and just ignore comments like “We told you so.”

We are all good at something, you just need to find the passion that drives you

Sometimes family and loved ones think they know what career choices are the best for us and they want to impose their opinions on us. They have the best intentions, but when we disagree with their suggestions, they immediately express a fear that we won’t do well in life.

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The reality is if you take their advice, you’ll end up miserable. Success comes because you feel passionate about what you do. That is the key – you need to find something you feel passionate about and keep going forward even if it seems you are going against the world. Your passion will motivate you, and you will be able to shut down all those voices telling you that you’re wrong. You shouldn’t worry about what people around you will think about your career choice. If it makes you happy, that’s all that matters. And that’s all it takes to become good at something.

Believe in yourself. What people say to you speaks more about them than you

If someone keeps criticizing you, you should stop for a moment and consider what it really means. It doesn’t have anything to do with you – it has to do with their own fears and insecurities. Maybe they wanted something different in life but they were too afraid to see it through and now they see you on your way to pursuing happiness. They want to bring you back to earth desperately either because they think you’ll suffer like them if you fail to realize your dreams or because they are jealous since you have the courage to do something they couldn’t. Either way, just be aware that it doesn’t say anything about you and don’t let it affect your confidence.

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Shutting the voices around you, and the voices inside your head, that tell you “you are not good enough” is the key to happiness and success. You are worth it and you can do it. Embrace all the ups and downs as the part of your journey, believe in yourself, and never let anyone get into your head to drive you away from your path.

Featured photo credit: Tim Marshall via unsplash.com

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Ana Erkic

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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