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How to Feel Better When Someone is Rude to You

How to Feel Better When Someone is Rude to You

Ever had that coworker that always seems to bear all of the problems of the whole universe? What about a rude driver? Or that person crossing the street that won’t even raise a hand to say “thank you” for letting them cross the street? Or that barista that does not have a smiling face and makes you want to buy coffee some place else?

It is not easy to be unaffected when someone shows us a bad attitude or does not treat us the way that we expect them to, but the truth is, we probably are not the reason why they are behaving rudely towards us. Do not take it personally.

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Maybe the person is having a bad day.

Think of this: when you are having a really bad day and someone shows up and says “hi” to you it is hard to instantly shift from a bad mood to a good mood. It does not mean that you hate the person that just started talking to you. You are just dealing with personal annoyances.

Maybe the person has personal problems.

Sometimes you are the last thing on a person’s mind, but when you suddenly show up, or present another difficult situation, you end up being the other person’s target. They do this unintentionally though, so you will have to consider that other people carry a variety of problems that are difficult to deal with.

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Maybe the person is not feeling well.

Pain or discomfort are not easy things to get a handle on. When someone is sick or not feeling well, most of the time they just want to be left alone to rest. Dealing with physical problems affects how someone treats another person.

Maybe the person has personal issues.

Maybe the person is rude to you because he or she is insecure, or maybe wants what you have but knows that they are not capable of having it, so instead they turn against you. Insecurity and jealousy are just some of the reasons why someone might treat you badly. It is not your issue; it is theirs, so let them deal with it- not you.

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You just need to ignore it and go on with your day.

According to Albert Einstein, “Weak people revenge. Strong people forgive. Intelligent people ignore.” That quote is so true. When something is ignored, it does not come back to you and affect you unless you allow it to. When you are able to do this, it shows that you have strength of character.

However other people behave towards you, do not think that it is you causing it. In this way you avoid conflicts and feelings of resentment. When you try to understand where the other person is coming from, you tend to be more forgiving and less critical of other people. You also are showing confidence in yourself because you do not think of yourself as someone causing trouble.

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We all go through different situations in life and we do not know everything about what other people are going through. Even closest friends sometimes cannot tell how the other is feeling or how he or she would react to a certain situation. Therefore, let us all be kind and show someone who is having a difficult day that there are still nice things in the world to appreciate- like our kindness.

Remember, you cannot control other people’s reactions, but you can control your own, and if you show goodness towards another person, the more likely that person will be to realize that he or she should not be treating you badly after all.

Featured photo credit: Pexels.com via static.pexels.com

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Sarah Bonander

Writer, Human Resources Professional

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Last Updated on March 13, 2019

How to Get out of a Rut: 12 Useful Ways to Get Unstuck

How to Get out of a Rut: 12 Useful Ways to Get Unstuck

Have you gotten into a rut before? Or are you in a rut right now?

You know you’re in a rut when you run out of ideas and inspiration. I personally see a rut as a productivity vacuum. It might very well be a reason why you aren’t getting results. Even as you spend more time on your work, you can’t seem to get anything constructive done. While I’m normally productive, I get into occasional ruts (especially when I’ve been working back-to-back without rest). During those times, I can spend an entire day in front of the computer and get nothing done. It can be quite frustrating.

Over time, I have tried and found several methods that are helpful to pull me out of a rut. If you experience ruts too, whether as a working professional, a writer, a blogger, a student or other work, you will find these useful. Here are 12 of my personal tips to get out of ruts:

1. Work on the small tasks.

When you are in a rut, tackle it by starting small. Clear away your smaller tasks which have been piling up. Reply to your emails, organize your documents, declutter your work space, and reply to private messages.

Whenever I finish doing that, I generate a positive momentum which I bring forward to my work.

2. Take a break from your work desk.

Get yourself away from your desk and go take a walk. Go to the washroom, walk around the office, go out and get a snack.

Your mind is too bogged down and needs some airing. Sometimes I get new ideas right after I walk away from my computer.

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3. Upgrade yourself

Take the down time to upgrade yourself. Go to a seminar. Read up on new materials (#7). Pick up a new language. Or any of the 42 ways here to improve yourself.

The modern computer uses different typefaces because Steve Jobs dropped in on a calligraphy class back in college. How’s that for inspiration?

4. Talk to a friend.

Talk to someone and get your mind off work for a while.

Talk about anything, from casual chatting to a deep conversation about something you really care about. You will be surprised at how the short encounter can be rejuvenating in its own way.

5. Forget about trying to be perfect.

If you are in a rut, the last thing you want to do is step on your own toes with perfectionist tendencies.

Just start small. Do what you can, at your own pace. Let yourself make mistakes.

Soon, a little trickle of inspiration will come. And then it’ll build up with more trickles. Before you know it, you have a whole stream of ideas.

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6. Paint a vision to work towards.

If you are continuously getting in a rut with your work, maybe there’s no vision inspiring you to move forward.

Think about why you are doing this, and what you are doing it for. What is the end vision in mind?

Make it as vivid as possible. Make sure it’s a vision that inspires you and use that to trigger you to action.

7. Read a book (or blog).

The things we read are like food to our brain. If you are out of ideas, it’s time to feed your brain with great materials.

Here’s a list of 40 books you can start off with. Stock your browser with only the feeds of high quality blogs, such as Lifehack.org, DumbLittleMan, Seth Godin’s Blog, Tim Ferris’ Blog, Zen Habits or The Personal Excellence Blog.

Check out the best selling books; those are generally packed with great wisdom.

8. Have a quick nap.

If you are at home, take a quick nap for about 20-30 minutes. This clears up your mind and gives you a quick boost. Nothing quite like starting off on a fresh start after catching up on sleep.

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9. Remember why you are doing this.

Sometimes we lose sight of why we do what we do, and after a while we become jaded. A quick refresher on why you even started on this project will help.

What were you thinking when you thought of doing this? Retrace your thoughts back to that moment. Recall why you are doing this. Then reconnect with your muse.

10. Find some competition.

Nothing quite like healthy competition to spur us forward. If you are out of ideas, then check up on what people are doing in your space.

Colleagues at work, competitors in the industry, competitors’ products and websites, networking conventions.. you get the drill.

11. Go exercise.

Since you are not making headway at work, might as well spend the time shaping yourself up.

Sometimes we work so much that we neglect our health and fitness. Go jog, swim, cycle, whichever exercise you prefer.

As you improve your physical health, your mental health will improve, too. The different facets of ourselves are all interlinked.

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Here’re 15 Tips to Restart the Exercise Habit (and How to Keep It).

12. Take a good break.

Ruts are usually signs that you have been working too long and too hard. It’s time to get a break.

Beyond the quick tips above, arrange for a 1-day or 2-days of break from your work. Don’t check your (work) emails or do anything work-related. Relax and do your favorite activities. You will return to your work recharged and ready to start.

Contrary to popular belief, the world will not end from taking a break from your work. In fact, you will be much more ready to make an impact after proper rest. My best ideas and inspiration always hit me whenever I’m away from my work.

Take a look at this to learn the importance of rest: The Importance of Scheduling Downtime

More Resources About Getting out of a Rut

Featured photo credit: Joshua Earle via unsplash.com

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