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25 Hilarious Truths About Life and Love We Can Learn From Woody Allen Movies

25 Hilarious Truths About Life and Love We Can Learn From Woody Allen Movies

After talking with almost everyone close to me in my life, I can without a doubt say that the majority all hate Woody Allen.  My mom hates him. My roommates think he’s a pervert.  My dog even barks when he sees him on the television screen!

I was just kidding about that last part.  I don’t own a dog, but if I did, I’m sure he’d hate him too.

However, even with all his scandals and quirks, there’s something about Woody Allen that makes him strangely charming; and for me, that’s his writing.  In fact, one of my favorite quotes, which happens to be #20 on this list, is from a Woody Allen movie.  He has a particular way of conveying truths about human nature through humor that’s unparalleled by any other satirical screenwriter, and that’s saying something.

So despite all the negativity surrounding him, I believe we can all learn something and relate in some way to the characters he’s created in his films.

After all, he’s led a long and highly interesting life.  I’d be surprised if he didn’t have any life experiences to impart to his audiences.

Here are 25 hilarious life truths about life and love we can learn from Woody Allen’s films:

 

1. We all come from different walks of life.

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Antz

    “Let’s be real about this. Bala and I… Bala is a princess, and I’m a soil relocation engineer” – Z, from Antz

    2.) And we all have our differences.

    “Exercising changed my life”

    “I prefer to atrophy.” – Lillian House and Larry Lipton, from Manhattan Murder Mystery

    3.) But we’re similar in the fact that sometimes we feel insecure in ourselves.

    “You can’t learn to be real. It’s like learning to be a midget.” – Gil Shepherd, from The Purple Rose of Cairo

    4.) There will be times when we doubt ourselves completely.

    “I don’t know what the hell I’m doing here. I’m 237 years old, I should be collecting social security.” – Miles Monroe, from Sleeper

    5.) As well as our authority figures.

    AnnieHall_024Pyxurz

       

      “Sun is bad for you. Everything our parents said was good is bad. Sun, milk, red meat… college.” – Alvy Singer, from Annie Hall

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      6.) But eventually we come to realize: if we can’t be honest with ourselves, who can we be honest with?

      “I had a great evening; it was like the Nuremberg Trials.” – Mickey, from Hannah and Her Sisters

      7.) Once we learn to embrace who we are, we can learn to embrace others.

      “For me, love is very deep, sex only has to go a few inches.” – Rita, from Bullets Over Broadway

      8.) It all starts with having our priorities in check.

      “Who do you have to sleep with around here to get a Stoli martini with a twist of lemon?” – Jasmine, from Blue Jasmine

      9.) And realizing there is no absolute truth in this world.

      “Science is an intellectual dead end, you know? It’s a lot of little guys in tweed suits cutting up frogs on foundation grants.” – Miles Monroe, from Sleeper

      10.) So why worry? After all, taking risks is what makes life interesting.

       

      Purple09

        “It’s so impulsive, but… I’ll come. Why not? What’s life without a little risk taking? Who knows?” – Tom Baxter, from The Purple Rose of Cairo

        11.) Because if we keep reflecting on the past, we’re always going to worry about what could have been instead of what can be.

        “He is always very depressed. I think that if he’d been a successful criminal, he would have felt better. You know, he never made the ‘ten most wanted’ list. It’s very unfair voting; it’s who you know.” – Louise, from Take the Money and Run

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        12.) But what can be may not always turn out the way you planned.

        “If you want a happy ending, you should go see a Hollywood movie.” – Judah Rosenthal, from Crimes and Misdemeanors

        13.) You have to accept the things you cannot change.

        “A relationship, I think, is like a shark. You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies. And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.” – Alvy Singer, from Annie Hall

        14.) And the people you cannot change.

        “We fell in love. I fell in love – she just stood there.” – Fielding Mellish, from Bananas

        15.) But that’s okay, because making mistakes is a part of the process.

        everyone-says-i-love-you-woody-allen

          “There was a moment there when I stroked when I should have hickeyed.” – Joe, from Everyone Says I Love You

          16.) Sometimes it just isn’t meant to be.

          “We are meant for each other and not meant for each other. It’s a contradiction.” – Juan Antonio, from Vicky Christina Barcelona

          17.) Sometimes, you’re better off on your own.

          “No genius is worth too much heartache.” – Joe Bedloe, from Sweet and Lowdown

          18.) But when you do find “the one”, you’ll find that words cannot possibly express the depth of your feelings towards them.

          “Love is too weak a word for what I feel – I luuurve you, you know, I loave you, I luff you, two F’s, yes I have to invent, of course I – I do, don’t you think I do?” – Alvy Singer, from Annie Hall

          19.) But if they could, they would sound something kind of like this:

          “I had a mad impulse to throw you down on the lunar surface and commit interstellar perversion.” – Isaac Davis, from Manhattan

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          20.) Because love is a beautiful, but confusing thing.

          Love-and-Death-Keaton

            “To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be unhappy, one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you’re getting this down.” – Sonja, from Love and Death

            21.) Just as life is a confusing thing.

            “16 blue ponies, 21 jetplanes, and 12 spinning midgets.” – Sid Waterman, from Scoop

            22.) As well as being cruel at times.

            “You know not everything in the world is sinister… just practically everything.” – Sid Waterman, from Scoop

            23.) But even in all the cruelness and confusion of this world, there is still hope for all of us.

            “You stand on the brink of greatness. The world will open to you like an oyster. No… not like an oyster. The world will open to you like a magnificent vagina.” – Helen Sinclair, from Bullets over Broadway

            24.) Because even if life doesn’t always give you what you want…

            “That’s what the present is. It’s a little unsatisfying because life is unsatisfying.” – Gil, from Midnight in Paris

            25.) It almost always gives you what you need

            1375930702_Allen

              “I thought of that old joke, y’know, the, this… this guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, “Doc, uh, my brother’s crazy; he thinks he’s a chicken.” And, uh, the doctor says, “Well, why don’t you turn him in?” The guy says, “I would, but I need the eggs.” Well, I guess that’s pretty much now how I feel about relationships; y’know, they’re totally irrational, and crazy, and absurd, and… but, uh, I guess we keep goin’ through it because, uh, most of us… need the eggs.” – Alvy Singer, from Annie Hall

              Featured photo credit: Woody Allen Glasses/alyssa_michele via flickr.com

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              Last Updated on November 15, 2018

              Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

              Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

              What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

              As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

              The Success Mindset

              Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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              The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

              The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

              The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

              How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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              How To Create a Success Mindset

              People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

              1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

              How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

              A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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              There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

              2. Look For The Successes

              It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

              3. Eliminate Negativity

              You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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              When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

              4. Create a Vision

              Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

              If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

              An Inspirational Story…

              For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

              What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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