Advertising
Advertising

8 Signs You Aren’t Falling Behind But Just Going The Right Way

8 Signs You Aren’t Falling Behind But Just Going The Right Way

Sometimes, we find ourselves stopping and reflecting on whether we are getting ahead and getting what we really want in life, or if we are just letting life pass us by. You may find yourself stuck in situations by choice. But being stuck does not necessarily mean that we are falling behind. Compare yourself to the waves that are quietly contemplating, waiting to throw the next big one at the right time. Consider yourself going in the right direction if you see yourself in these situations:

1. You’re still busy exploring and haven’t settled yet.

It could be that you haven’t made up your mind that you will stay at your current job within the next 10 years. Or that you have not gotten married yet because you are not sure if your partner is the right one. Or stay in the same city until you are 50. The main lesson is, it is good to keep exploring for better things rather than settling. Some 40-year-olds that I know are still unsure about what to do next in their lives so they plan to stay in status quo for a little while. And that is ok. Rash decisions most often yield rash results. So it is better to stop and explore what else is out there.

Advertising

2. Your savings haven’t gone up much because you want to see the world.

They say that traveling is the only thing that makes us richer. And I couldn’t think of anything truer than that. Traveling though, is a financial decision. If you decided to travel while your legs are still strong enough to let you, do not blame yourself if your bank account is not inflating that fast. The trade off to that is a more culturally rich you. There is no better teacher than traveling.

3. You are ok with failing because you know you’ll gain more after.

Never be afraid of risks. If you fall down, get back up. And when you are back up, let yourself be a better person from the experience. The lessons that we learn from failing are necessary to make us successful. And if we let ourselves get scared of failing, we will never leave our comfort zone. Nobody that has ever succeeded has stayed in their comfort zones. If they did, we won’t have airplanes or computers or cures for certain diseases because all of those were created by people who allowed themselves to fail.

Advertising

image

    4. You daydream a lot and are constantly inspired.

    They say that an empty can is the one that makes the most noise. If you find yourself switching to quiet mode and your mind starts wandering and daydreaming, know that there is nothing wrong with that. It is a sign that you have a creative imagination and a successful future starts with a creative mind. You can go as far as your mind can go.

    Advertising

    5. You don’t work just for money, but focus on the meaning of work.

    You might find yourself stuck in a job that does not pay as well as another profession. But it is what drives you and it nourishes your soul. Money is a necessity, but the happiness that it gives is temporary. It’s like buying a car that you have been excited about. And after a year of using it daily, it just becomes an ordinary thing to you; no meaning. So find work that is meaningful.

    6. You haven’t met someone that really suits you, but refuse to compromise.

    It is better to be alone than to be with the wrong person. The sadness that you are feeling because you are alone will be nothing compared to the pain that you will go through if you are with the wrong person. If you are not settling because you have not met the right person yet, it just means that you put value on yourself. And in order to find the right person, you need to be in love with yourself first. The right person will not make you a complete person; it will take two complete persons to be in a complete relationship.

    Advertising

    7. You chase your passions even if success is not guaranteed.

    I have read articles about people in their death beds wishing that they went after their passions. I cannot say this enough. You have to do what makes you happy whether or not success is guaranteed. Because there are no guarantees in life. And also, success does not only come from outside; it also comes from inside of you. Success can be that feeling of being fulfilled when you are doing what you are passionate about.

    8. You let yourself take breaks to recharge because you work better afterward.

    Burn-out is an epidemic. Let us not bury ourselves in work, or in planning the next big thing. We all need to take a break because mentally, physically, and emotionally, we will all perform better after we stop and rest. Better to be strong and steady than be fast and weak.

    More by this author

    Sarah Bonander

    Writer, Human Resources Professional

    17 Comics About Periods That Only Women Would Understand A Mindset That All Likeable People Share Still Focusing On To-Do Lists? Steve Jobs Focused On A Stop-Doing List To Persuade People, The Key Is To Make Them Feel Good 3 Tricks To Become Much More Productive And Motivated

    Trending in Communication

    1The Gentle Art of Saying No 217 Ted Talks for Kids to Inspire Little Minds to Do Big Things 310 Toxic Persons You Should Just Get Rid Of 4Striving Towards Secure Attachment: How to Restructure Your Thoughts 5Being Self Aware Is the Key to Success: How to Boost Self Awareness

    Read Next

    Advertising
    Advertising

    The Gentle Art of Saying No

    The Gentle Art of Saying No

    No!

    It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

    Advertising

    But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

    Advertising

    What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

    Advertising

    But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here are the Top 10 tips for learning the Gentle Art of Saying No:

    1. Value your time. Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”
    2. Know your priorities. Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time? For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.
    3. Practice saying no. Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.
    4. Don’t apologize. A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.
    5. Stop being nice. Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets. Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.
    6. Say no to your boss. Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning. But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.
    7. Pre-empting. It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting, “Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”
    8. Get back to you. Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them: “After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.” At least you gave it some consideration.
    9. Maybe later. If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say, “This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].” Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.
    10. It’s not you, it’s me. This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time. Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

    Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

    Advertising

    Read Next