We don’t have to be as fashionable as Jonny Depp, the idea of fashion is to wear what makes you comfortable and feel good, however, there are some solid rules in fashion that we should not be broken. We have compiled a list of fashion laws (Yes, laws, not tips, nor suggestions) that all men should follow.
Rule #1. Don’t clip your phone or gadgets on your belt.
Batman wears a utility belt. He also wears his underpants outside of his tights.
Rule #2. Avoid wearing square toed shoes.
Unless you’re after that Legoman look.
Rule #3. Get a navy blue suit
It’ll make you look slimmer.
Rule #4. Get tailored suits and shirts.
Not only makes you look smarter, it doesn’t make you look like someone who’s been on a crash diet and hasn’t had time to update their wardrobe.
Rule #5. Fat wallets don’t make you look rich; try to use a moneyclip
Nothing says ugly more than a big fat wallet.
Rule #6. Pink socks should not be wore at all costs.
It makes you look like a dork.
Rule #7. NEVER wear socks with sandals…
If you want to cover your feet, wear shoes.
Rule #8. Put your collar down and don’t open more than two buttons.
It’s not possible to have a cold neck and hot chest at the same time.
Rule #9. The color of shoes and belt must match.
Color coordination!
Rule #10. Only wear athletic shoes when occasions allow you to do so.
Rule #11. Wear clothes that FIT your body shape. Not too tight or too loose.
Rule #12. Two objects of similar but not completely identical color don’t look good together. Unless they are designed to fit together.
Rule #13. Never wear jeans with jeans jacket
Rule #14. Never wear jeans with light colored running shoes
Unless you are Steve jobs.
Rule #15. Don’t wear pants that don’t let you walk in full stride
Unless you want to look like you’re constipated when you walk.
Rule #16. No clothes that come pre-torn.
It makes you look dirty and a throwback from a previous era.
Rule #17. White socks and black shoes are a no-no.
Unless you’re Michael Jackson.
Rule #18. Do not wear crocs
Rule #19. Wear just enough cologne.
Not the amount that makes everyone know that you are about to arrive
Rule #20. Do not mix too many patterns on your clothes
Featured photo credit: Invisible Man with two leather via Shutterstock
Strongly disagree with the pink sock comment. A pop-colour sock is one of the coolest fashion choices on the planet. Also the guy you used to illustrate too many pattern choices looks awesome. Rule #21 : Don’t forget to have fun, it’s just fashion
Nope. Wrong. The pattern choice guy can only look awesome to a blind twink.
I agree with your comments in theory, but pink pop-socks and that many patterns are serious pro moves. Red (or even yellow) is a much better pop color for most guys’ color palates, and it still gets the job done.
And you’ve got to really know visual balance to pull off a kit with that many patterns. Sticking to one or two patterns (stripes + dots = easy mix) lets a guy look sharp without risking looking like a fool.
A man who follows trends such as this might be viewed as too young, too immature, or too lacking in self-identity to be taken seriously in many fields. It suggests that the man is too easily influenced by fads or by what the “cool kids” are wearing, neither of which reads as manly.
“Rule #6. Pink socks should not be wore at all costs. ”
“Wore” should not be used as a replacement for “worn” at all costs lest your readers think of yøu as Croat.
Rule 12: Don’t wear pants that are similar in color to your pants?
“Rule #1. Don’t clip your phone or gadgets on your belt”
Sure, let all your gadgets bounce around in your pockets absorbing sweat on your thighs, and also making you fumble through your pocket like a dork desperately trying to pull your phone out while you’re sitting in a tightly-packed bus or train.
If you’re carrying more than one gadget, you need a bag. Everything but your cellphone goes in that bag. The cell phone is tucked in your jacket pocket. No fumbling and no looking like a dork wearing your gear on your belt. You’re not Batman.
Those rules about matching are mixed up with matching rules for women’s clothing. As long as your shirt is not the same colour as your trousers or jacket, and your jacket doesn’t match your trousers, unless it’s a suit, you are fine (in that regard).
Thanks goodness a slam on skinny jeans made the list (#15) Good grief why on earth would those ever be a good idea? Now I just need to get some pink socks.
Seems 14 was added just for the Jobs joke. Either deny white tennis shoes entirely with long pants or leave them alone. From the article apparently it is okay to where white tennis shoes with slacks and cargo pants but not with blue jeans? Nonsense.
I think you forgot one:
“21. Your underwear should NEVER be visible during a normal workday.”
Rule 7 applies especially to women who wear open-toed shoes with pantyhose!
Disproving rule #17: The Blues Brothers successfully (and correctly) pull off white socks with black pants and shoes.
Looks like the pic for #12 was supposed to be for a “don’t wear pleated pants, wear flat-front” rules. Which is also a good guideline!
Sez you! Look up the phrase “Degustibus non est disputandem”.
If you don’t have a gut, pleated fronts work. It’s just a style difference. You might as well argue that single-breasted suits are preferable —- except when clothing manufacturers push double-breasted suits. Then there are vests….
Don’t you bozos understand that there are NO permanent fashion standards ??? —- that’s why they”re called “fashion”.
p.s. when Eric Clapton recorded “Bell-Bottom Blues”, he wasn’t lamenting the fact that he was wearing bell bottoms!!! They were fashionable then, but….would you appear in public wearing them now?
Well, sure you would— the second Justin Bieber wears them!
I said “guideline” for a reason: pleats are generally not as flattering as flat-front trousers. And pleats can easily creep into BIG pleats, which are only great if you’re doing a Pat Riley circa 1993 impression. Pleats can look great, but they’re trickier to pull off. Flat-fronts are no muss, no fuss.
As for there not being permanent fashion standards, I say yes and no. There are “timeless” looks that transcend trends. Flat-front pants (especially chinos) happen to be one of them. Pick any decade, and you can wear them and fit in. You can’t say the same about pleats.
I would say the same thing about single vs. double-breasted suits. If you’re going to have one suit, a single-breasted suit is going to be more versatile and timeless.
Hence “guideline”, not “rule”.
PS: “Bell-Bottom Blues” wasn’t about pants, it was about Pattie Boyd.
These rules seem so basic it’s amazing that not everyone follows them. Of course, at times, some rules are made to be broken. I think wearing unique socks (and I often don’t match them) is ok in the right setting (not work).
The only rule that I actively break is the collar one, #8. I always pop the collar on my polo shirts. I was raised that way and I’m not about to change it. There’s a function, too. The collar protects my neck from the sun during the summer. I don’t wear polos in the off season and you’ll never see me with a popped collar on a button down shirt.
#17 is soooo 1999… suck it up… white socks rock!
How can this list NOT include colored shirts with white collar and cuffs? Just awful.
Agreed. I girlfriend gave me one of those and got mad as hell at me for not liking it. I told her, just don’t buy me anything.
Great list – most of which men should have learned in grade school – but “Crocs”? Really? Crocs are far less offensive than 99% of what passes for flip-flops and/or “athletic shoes” – AND Crocs are and away a better choice than “Mandals” – the regrettably male alternative to sandals. A pair of which no man has worn well since Romans ruled the world.
You know what else is irritating about this ? Lee seems to be a milk-whiskered youth whose main desire is to overthrow the notorious Mr. Blackwell, the epicene twit who issued fey decrees about “fashion victims” on a “ten worst dressed list”.
Does the world really need yet another nobody gratuitously telling people what not to wear?
I just saw a quote on this site from a Richard Koch: it begins: “Everything you want in life should be yours”.
OK. I want eternal youth, eternal health and eternal life.
He also says I deserve money to support my lifestyle. Great!!! It’s obvious the people raving about their Obamaphones are Koch followers!!
Face it: this site is for FLAKES and TAKERS.
Fashion comments: idiotic, the product of a milk-whiskered youth who doesn’t understand that “fashion” changes , AND that he’s got no clout as an referee.
English usage: grammatical errors all over the place. Gangnam style!! But not the sign of a serious person — unless you want to argue “what ev” — which would make the idea of fashion criticism even more trivial.
Anyone who knows traditional Japanese kimono dress understands that many of the faux esthetics our sniffy little “yute” puts forth were violated regularly: “clashing” colors, jarring patterns, asymmetrical designs, the whole lot.
Yet traditional kimonos are eye-poppingly beautiful—despite their violation of the limp-wristed kind of “standards” our still-wet-behind-the-ears savant serves up.
I’m not getting no. 16 except don’t wear white pants. Ever. I don’t care if you’re going on a boat or if it’s spring time. Just don’t do it.
The ultimate in hilariously awful menswear is the Lileks’ Dorcus Collection. Protect your keyboard first.
20 Fashion Laws to “Judge” others
Some of these "laws" are ridiculous! No pink socks! trust me, there are many men out there who can and do pull off pink socks and look damn sexy doing it. It's knowing HOW to wear them and WHAT to wear them with that counts. Two articles of similar clothing not working? not true at all. That is often the best way to get things to work because they are in the same color palette and create a link through their color. Again it's really just knowing how to wear it. And don't get me started on jean jackets with jeans, of course you can wear them together. Matching them together like you would a track suit is the wrong way to go, but trust me, jeans and a jean jacket are not taboo, and definitely not breaking any laws.
Fashion laws that all men should follow… if you want to look like every other douche. Wear whatever the fuck you want. Variety is the spice of life.