Maybe you’ve spent time around a disengaged employee or you’re guilty of being one; it’s pretty easy to spot them. They’re the colleagues that would clearly rather be anywhere else in the world. They put more effort into getting their coffee than they do into actually completing their work to the best of their ability. They probably don’t care whether the company is successful and are usually the least helpful employees to turn to in the office.
Here, Officevibe have compiled a list of the most common and irritating traits of a disengaged employee so you can recognise them and, far more importantly, ensure that you are not one of them if you want to keep your job.
It’s the job interview of your life and you need to come up with something fast. Mental pictures of words are mixing in your head and your tongue tastes like alphabet soup. You mutter words like “deterministic” or “innovativity” and you realize you’re drenched in sweat. You wish you had thought about this. You wish you had read this post before.
Here are 20 sentences that you could use when you are asked to describe yourself. Choose the ones that describe you the best.
“I am someone who…”:
“can adapt to any situation. I thrive in a fluctuating environment and I transform unexpected obstacles into stepping stones for achievements.”
“consistently innovates to create value. I find opportunities where other people see none: I turn ideas into projects, and projects into serial success.”
“has a very creative mind. I always have a unique perspective when approaching an issue due to my broad range of interests and hobbies. Creativity is the source of differentiation and therefore, at the root of competitive advantage.”
“always has an eye on my target. I endeavour to deliver high-quality work on time, every time. Hiring me is the only real guarantee for results.”
“knows this job inside and out. With many years of relevant experience, there is no question whether I will be efficient on the job. I can bring the best practices to the company.”
“has a high level of motivation to work here. I have studied the entire company history and observed its business strategies. Since I am also a long-time customer, I took the opportunity to write this report with some suggestions for how to improve your services.”
“has a pragmatic approach to things. I don’t waste time talking about theory or the latest buzz words of the bullshit bingo. Only one question matters to me: ‘Does it work or not?'”
“takes work ethics very seriously. I do what I am paid for, and I do it well.”
“can make decisions rapidly if needed. Everybody can make good decisions with sufficient time and information. The reality of our domain is different. Even with time pressure and high stakes, we need to move forward by taking charge and being decisive. I can do that.”
“is considered to be ‘fun.’ I believe that we are way more productive when we are working with people with which we enjoy spending time. When the situation gets tough with a customer, a touch of humour can save the day.”
“works as a real team-player. I bring the best out of the people I work with and I always do what I think is best for the company.”
“is completely autonomous. I won’t need to be micromanaged. I won’t need to be trained. I understand high-level targets and I know how to achieve them.”
“leads people. I can unite people around a vision and motivate a team to excellence. I expect no more from the others than what I expect from myself.”
“understands the complexity of advanced project management. It’s not just pushing triangles on a GANTT chart; it’s about getting everyone to sit down together and to agree on the way forward. And that’s a lot more complicated than it sounds.”
“is the absolute expert in the field. Ask anybody in the industry. My name is on their lips because I wrote THE book on the subject.”
“communicates extensively. Good, bad or ugly, I believe that open communication is the most important factor to reach an efficient organization.”
“works enthusiastically. I have enough motivation for myself and my department. I love what I do, and it’s contagious.”
“has an eye for details because details matter the most. How many companies have failed because of just one tiny detail? Hire me and you’ll be sure I’ll find that detail.”
“can see the big picture. Beginners waste time solving minor issues. I understand the purpose of our company, tackle the real subjects and the top management will eventually notice it.”
“is not like anyone you know. I am the candidate you would not expect. You can hire a corporate clone, or you can hire someone who will bring something different to the company. That’s me. “