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Using NAKED to Get What You Want

Using NAKED to Get What You Want


    We all have goals, ambitions, and desires.

    In other words, we all want things.

    Maybe we want them for ourselves, maybe we want them for our loved ones, and maybe we want them for our society, or the entire world.

    Whatever it happens to be, we all want something.

    And usually, we need other people to help us or cooperate with us in order to get those things.

    The question is, how do we get them to help out? How do we get them to stop what they’re doing, care about what we’re describing, and get what you want?

    Get What You Want: The Naked Truth

    Hardly anyone will help you just for the sake of helping you; there needs to be something in it for them.

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    This isn’t wrong, and it isn’t unkind, it’s just human nature. Strangers don’t typically help strangers unless there’s a benefit to be had.

    That benefit could be an outcome that they desire, information or knowledge they want, or they could have some kind of personal interest in your success.

    There are occasional altruistic, kind-hearted exceptions, but for the most part, getting someone to take an action that you want them to take can be a challenge. The thing is, though, that there are many occasions when we need to do it; from shopping, to our social lives, with our families, and with our businesses.

    Does this sound a little sleazy to you?

    Well, it certainly can be, but it doesn’t have to be, and really, it SHOULDN’T be.

    So before I get into the nitty gritty of how to convince people that they want what you want, let’s talk a little bit about how NOT to do it…

    Not About Pick-up Artistry or Manipulation

    If you got the impression that you have to trick people into thinking that they want what you want, you got it wrong.

    This is a common misconception in the world of pick-up artistry – pick up artists help people justify doing things that they feel like, but don’t really want, and will probably regret in the morning.

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    This is completely unsustainable in the context of any serious relationship. We’ve all that that friend who always had their hand out – for your time, your advice, even your money, and never returned the favor, or even made any pretense of doing so! It may take a while, but sooner or later you’re going to cut that friend loose!

    You’ve had that experience, haven’t you? Maybe not just with a friend, but in another context?

    We’ll use the example of a purchase (to avoid dredging up last Thanksgiving’s family theater!):

    Think about a time when you hemmed and hawed and finally bought something, maybe against your better judgment, and then learned that it was really, really a mistake. When you went to the snake-oil salesman who convinced you to buy in the first place – they barely took the time to listen to you.

    Did you feel alienated? Angry? Disgusted? Hurt?

    The same feelings crop up, albeit sometimes more slowly and under the radar in less formal relationships; maybe the Homer Simpson-esque neighbor who forever borrows your lawn mower, but lets his dog do its business on your front yard. Someone who uses and takes advantage of the people in their lives is a swindler, the same way the snake-oil salesman and the pick-up artist are.

    No one wants to help a swindler, and you’ll find yourself going it alone sooner than you’d imagine if you manipulate and abuse people.

    All About Seduction and Persuasion

    Seduction and persuasion are a dance – they happen when two people arrive together at a common goal.

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    If you want to seduce and persuade, you have to understand why something is good for you, but also why it’s good for them.

    And I’m not talking in terms of the warm fuzzies someone will get from helping you out (although never underestimate the power of a warm fuzzy); I’m talking about the real, solid benefits a person can get from being able to align their wants and needs with yours. There are several steps to powerful persuasion:

    • Spending time developing a relationship with people first.
    • Listening to what they say and responding honestly.
    • Backing off when you’re goals aren’t aligned – with no hard feelings.
    • And once you get what you want, whether it’s a ride to the mall or a donation to your charity, you take the time to thank the person who helped you.

    You see, seduction and persuasion aren’t always bad – they can be fantastic when the process is transparent. Seduction, when employed correctly, is a pleasure for all parties involved.  Persuasion is the same – it’s the method by which you encourage someone to make a decision that will be good for you both.

    Sexy to You isn’t Sexy to Me!

    What’s sexy and seductive to me, after all, may not be what’s sexy and seductive to you. People respond to different things – that’s what makes the world such a wonderful, fascinating place, and part of what makes human relationships so exciting and rewarding.

    There are “best practices” to be sure: honesty, listening, empathy, etc. — but there is no one best way to engage in the dance of seduction and persuasion.

    The first step in starting the dance of seductive persuasion is getting to know the person you want something from – what makes them tick, what they need and what they value.

    In business, you do this by creating a comprehensive customer profile – a crib sheet on the heart of your ideal customer. Once you know what makes that person tick, you can use the information to give them what they want, when they want it.

    In life, in your relationships, it’s more subtle. You have to spend time thinking about what motivates the person you want something from.

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    If you’re looking for donations to a food bank, you might appeal to a neighbor’s sense of civic duty. You know they have one because they run the flag up every day, make a point of being polite and friendly to passersby, and scrupulously bring out the recycling on the appointed day at the appointed hour.

    Every person has different things that motivate them, and if you take the time to figure out what those things are, and then frame your request in that light, your chances of success are much, much higher.

    And the person you wanted something from will be likely to thank you for the opportunity.

    Now that doesn’t sound too sleazy, does it?

    I’ve done my best to compile this idea into a framework, in a way that is both fun and informative. I call it the Naked Marketing Manifesto, and it will help you identify those motivators in the people you deal with, and then tailor your activities with them so that you end up with happy, loyal, long-term relationships – and not broke and alone and despised by everyone you used to be friends with.

    (Photo credit: Truth Road Sign via Shutterstock)

    Danny Iny (@DannyIny) is the co-founder of Firepole Marketing, the “Freddy Krueger of Blogging”, and the co-author (with Guy Kawasaki, Brian Clark, and many others) of Engagement from Scratch! (available on Amazon, or as a free download). The latest and greatest thing you can get from him (for free, of course) is his Naked Marketing Manifesto, about marketing that really works!

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    Last Updated on April 6, 2020

    15 Best Productivity Hacks for Procrastinators

    15 Best Productivity Hacks for Procrastinators

    Let me guess.

    You should be doing something else rather than reading this article. But due to some unknown force of nature, you decided to procrastinate by reading an article about how to hack procrastination. You deserve a pat on the back.

    Fortunately, procrastination is not a disease. It’s just a mindset that can be changed, however, here are some productivity tips you need to start getting work done:

    First, you need to acknowledge that procrastinating is an unhealthy habit. Not only you’re prioritizing unimportant things, basically, nothing gets done. Still unsure if you’re a procrastinator? Check out this article: Types of Procrastination (And How To Fix Procrastination And Start Doing)

    Second, your commitment to change is very important. You should be physically, emotionally, and mentally determined to change this habit. If not, then you’ll just succumb to the tempting lure of doing other things rather than your tasks or chores.

    Here are sthe best productivity hacks to improve productivity and keep yourself from procrastinating at work:

    1. Give (10+2)*5 a Try

    Let’s start with a classic but very effective hack called (10+2)*5 created by Merlin Mann,[1] author of 43Folders.com. Don’t worry. This is not a complicated Mathematical formula you need to solve.

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    The (10+2)*5 simply means 10 minutes work + 2 minutes break multiplied by 5, completing 1 hour. It is crucial to stick with the time limits and not skipping work and break schedules. The point of this is for you to create a jam-packed routine of work and break schedules. The result? You will eventually skip your break schedules.

    2. Use Red and Blue More Often

    Clean your desk and remove things that might distract you. According to a Science Daily study[2] about which colors improve brain performance, red was found out to increase attention to details while blue sparks creativity. Surrounding your workplace with these colors not only benefits your brain, it’s also pleasing to the eye.

    3. Create a Break Agenda

    List all the things you want to do on your break, be it surfing the web, checking your emails, snack time, taking selfies, Facebook/Twitter—everything.

    Like the (10+2)*5 hack, squeeze these in between work time but the difference is you schedule these activities for ONLY 20 minutes. Eventually, you’ll take your break minutes wisely. You’re finishing tasks while sidetracking to doing the things you enjoy.

    4. Set a Timetable for Your Tasks

    Like any other habits, procrastinating is a tough wall to break. Replace this habit with another habit. When you’re assigned a task, set a timetable for each step. Let’s say you have a big research task. Here’s a sample timetable:

    9:00 – 9:10 am – Set up all your tools, browser tabs, emails, coffee, etc..
    9:10 – 10:00 am – Internet research
    10:00 – 10:45 am – Look through existing files
    10:45 – 11:00 am – Break time!
    11:00 – 12:00 pm – Outline the research report

    Deadlines are the best hack for getting things done. Setting a specific time to finish a task creates time pressure even if the deadline has passed.

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    5. Take It Outside!

    Do yourself a favor and don’t ruin the comfy vibe of your home. If you need to work on a stressful project, do it in a library or coffee shop. You’ll never finish it anyway. Your cozy sofa and toasty bed will just lure you into napping yourself to doom.

    6. Become Productively Lazy

    Instead of finding all sorts of ways to unproductively procrastinate, use your habit to look for shortcuts and new ways to finish your tasks. Staple multiple papers at a time or master the 3-second t-shirt folding technique. A strong drive combined with laziness sometimes bring out the productive and creative side you never knew you have!

    7. Assign a ‘Task Deputy’

    It could be your colleague, your supervisor, or your significant other, anyone who has the unforgiving guts to reprimand you when you procrastinate. You could go the extra mile by paying up unfinished tasks or times you open your Facebook or watch a funny cat video on YouTube. Let’s see how five bucks every time you procrastinate will change you.

    8. Consider a Gadget-Free Desk

    According to a study by Kleiner Perkins Caufield and Byers, average users check on their phones 150 times per day and having your phone just an elbow away just creates sizzle to this habit.[3]

    Removing mobile devices and gadgets allows you to focus on your work without the constant interruption from notifications, calls, and text messages. It eliminates the very distracting ambiance and the urge to unlock your phone just because.

    9. Prepping the Night

    Before hitting the sack to oblivion, prepare everything you’ll need the next day. This will probably take you 15 minutes tops, saving you more time for coffee in the morning.

    Spin class at am? Pack up your gym clothes, shoes, socks, etc. or better, create a checklist so you don’t miss anything. You can also prep your food into containers and just grab one before leaving.

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    10. Do a 7-Minute Workout in the Morning

    Exercising is proven to increase productivity and stimulate release of endorphin or “Happy Hormones”.

    Take a jog outdoors and get warmed up for the day. Don’t feel like running outside? Hop on a treadmilli. It’s a great investment and there are a lot of ways you can use a treadmill like endurance running and metabolism training. On a budget? Here’s a 7 minute, no-equipment needed workout you can do at home:

    11. Set-up Mini Tasks

    If you’re given a big project, break it down into mini tasks. Create a checklist and start with the easy ones until you finish. Got an article to write? Just start with the title and the first sentence. Or perhaps you have a visual presentation to make?

    Spend 15 minutes on your outline, take five minutes coffee break, then finish the first two slides. Accomplishing something, no matter how tiny, still gives you that sense of fulfillment.

    12. Create an Inspirational Board or Reminder

    I found these mini desk chalkboards from Etsy you can use to write motivating quotes.

    Or you know what? Simply write “Do it now!” and stare at it for 10 seconds every time you feel like dropping by on Reddit.

    13. Redecorate Your Room

    Redecorating my room motivates me to maintain that ‘new’ look for some time until I get use to it and eventually stop. So I redecorate again and again, it became a monthly habit really. Here are some DIY ideas you can do to any room without spending much.

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    14. Ready Your Nibbles

    You know that trip to the pantry? It’s just seconds away but it took you several minutes just to get your fruit snacks in the fridge. Before starting a task, prepare your nibbles on your desk to avoid zoning out and losing yourself on the way to the pantry.

    Bonus productivity hacks you can do at home:

    15. Schedule Your Chores

    Write down your chores in a weekly basis with matching day and time when you should be doing these.

    For the artsy folks, you can create fun chore charts like these or simply stick the list somewhere visibly annoying e.g. mirrors, doors, TV. The trick is listing as many chores as you can for the week and including unfinished chores the following week. Who likes seeing a long list of chores first thing in the morning?

    More Tips to Overcome Procrastination

    Featured photo credit: Glenn Carstens-Peters via unsplash.com

    Reference

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