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How To Be A Powerful Leader That Everyone Looks Up To

How To Be A Powerful Leader That Everyone Looks Up To
  • The shocking truth: everyone can be a powerful leader.
  • You might think you can’t, but you’re wrong–dead wrong.
  • Understand that the world needs leaders

    • We are made to rule the world around us.
    • When we were babies, we did that effortlessly. All we needed to do was cry. We got fed, we got changed and we got anything we wanted if we cried enough. We were ruling the world.
    • But we were taught to stop doing that. Because in the grown-up world, crying is not enough. Worse, it can be perceived as being weak.
    • So we stopped crying. We started begging. And if that didn’t work, we just stopped asking. Maybe now, we think we shouldn’t be asking for what we want and just be happy with what people give us. Congratulations! We’re now grown-ups (and we’re also sheep-like). We’re all looking for purpose and people who can show us that purpose.
    • Then come the leaders. Notice how they live their visions and vibrate with passion. We want to follow them, and we want to be them. They give us meaning.

    Step up to the challenge and decide to be a leader

    • Being a leader seems to be dangerous.
    • The russian proverb says:
    • The tallest blade of grass is first one to be cut by the scythe.
    • So why stick your neck out?
    • Because the world needs leaders. Not leaders by default. People who have decided to be leaders, people who shape the world and create purpose for other people.
    • Don’t be a consumer. Don’t be selfish. Decide right now to be a leader.
    • You are not a blade of grass. You are a human being. You won’t be killed for standing out.
    • Au contraire, people will look up to you.

    Create a purpose

    • You need to think BIG. People will follow your vision if it is BIG enough.
    • Do you want to follow somebody who just wants to add a stop sign in the neighborhood or do you want to follow someone who wants to make the neighborhood the safest place on earth?
    • Start by thinking TOO BIG, and inspire people to follow your purpose. Maybe it’ll be just BIG in the end.

    Vibrate with passion

    • Live your purpose. Be a leader who communicates with passion. Let it shine through your actions, and people will become drawn to you.
    • Some people will laugh at you. Some will tell you what you’re trying to do is not possible.
    • Let them talk. Your passion is BIGGER than that.
    • Your message will get to those who want to make a difference. They were waiting for you.

    Be transparent

    • Don’t have a hidden agenda. Don’t say you want X when you want Y. When the people you try to influence realize that you have other undisclosed interests, you will lose their trust. Trust takes a lot of time to build, and it is very difficult to repair. It is exactly like a mirror–once broken, there’s not much you can do.

    Make decisions, and make them fast

    • Don’t be a coward shying away from taking difficult decisions. Life is complicated and there are always major drawbacks to any major decisions. You’ll never have everyone agree with you, and you’ll never have all the information to be absolutely sure.
    • Even though real leaders listen to everyone’s opinion, real leaders decide fast and quickly act on them.
    • Powerful leaders are not the one deciding whether they want sugar or salt in their coffee; they’re the ones risking their life savings to create an amazing startup that will change the world.

    Apologize and learn from your mistakes

    • You will make mistakes. That’s for sure. But what’s important is how you deal with it and how you move on.
    • If you’ve let someone down, then apologize sincerely and take FULL responsibility. It’s easy to blame it on somebody or something else (like the bad economy for example), but it takes a real leader to say, “I screwed up, but I’ll make this right”.

    Let your acts speak for themselves

    • Don’t brag. It just doesn’t look good. You will notice that people who brag about their education or their long-past achievements are insecure about their current situation.
    • If you act like a real leader, then people will know it and spread the word for you.

    Remember you’re nobody without the others

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    Losers say, “We screwed up,” and “I succeeded.”

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    Powerful leaders say “I screwed up,” and “We succeeded.”

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    You have a whole team behind you. If you have success to share, share it to your team, and share it as a team.

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    Do you think you can be a leader?

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Last Updated on February 19, 2019

How to Break Bad Habits: I Broke 3 Bad Habits in Less Than 2 Months

How to Break Bad Habits: I Broke 3 Bad Habits in Less Than 2 Months

The cycle of bad habits is what keeps us living small and stops us from reaching our true potential. Breaking a bad habit isn’t as hard as it seems; despite being a CEO of a company and raising two children, I still managed to break 3 bad habits I had within 2 months. Yes, that’s quitting one habit in less than 21 days.

I took steps to eliminate them one at a time. Habits such as drinking Coke every day, slouching when sitting and not having a consistent exercise routine.

So how did I break these habits? I used the Control Alternate Delete Method (Ctrl Alt Del).

What is this method and why is it so effective? Read on to find out how to break bad habits with this unique method.

How to break bad habits with the Control Alternate Delete Method

    We all notice on some level what our bad habits are. A lot of the time we choose to ignore the negative ways these impact us.

    For me, I was sitting most of the day in front of my computer at work in a slouching position. I drank Coke every single day in an attempt to stay awake. I put off any kind of exercise regime because I felt that it was better to just relax and have fun after a whole day of work. As a result, I was leading a really unhealthy lifestyle suffering from weight gain and back pain.

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    I needed to make a change.

    I started to read books about building habits such as The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg, The One Thing by Gary W. Keller and Jay Papasan, and The Now Habit by Neil Fiore. After reading all these books, I’ve come up with my own method to quit bad habits — The Ctrl Alt Del Method.

    I started by focusing on just one bad habit, the first one being the sheer amount of Coke I was consuming each day.

    Every day I applied the Ctrl Alt Del Method and after two weeks, not only did I stop drinking Coke every day (I only drank one can in 2 weeks), but I started the better habit of drinking 8 glasses of water every day instead.

    After eliminating one bad habit, I moved on to the other two with this same method and a month later I was:

    • Hitting the gym twice a week.
    • Improving my sitting posture, not only at the office but also at home and everywhere else, improving my back pain.
    • Gaining core muscle which improved my back pain as well.
    • Losing fat around my waist which went from 36″ (considered obese level) to 32″ (normal level).

    If I can improve my life using this method, then so can you. Using this structure to eliminate your bad habits will increase your success and replace your bad habits with more positive ones.

    Control: Master your desire

      Identify your triggers

      Bad habits such as drinking alcohol, smoking and snacking too much trigger the release of dopamine, a feel-good chemical in the brain.[1] Although you might not like the end result, they give you a positive outcome in the moment. This is pure psychology.

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      It’s important to identify what is triggering you to continually act out your bad habit. This isn’t always an easy step because our habits have been built up over a long period of time.

      If you need help in identifying your triggers, here’s a list of common bad habits and their triggers: 13 Bad Habits You Need to Quit Right Away

      Self-reflect

      To help you work out your triggers, do a bit of self-reflection. Ask yourself questions such as:

      • What comfort are you getting from this habit?
      • Why do you need comfort?

      For example, I chose to drink coke because it tasted good and it made me feel good when I was stressed. I slouched only when I sat for too long working on my desk and started to feel tired. I skipped exercises because every day after work I felt I already did enough works and didn’t want to work out.

      If you choose to eat fast food every night, you’re probably telling yourself you’re too busy to cook. But ask yourself why? What are your priorities?

      Maybe you have a lack of self-worth that means you don’t have the self-love to want to look after your health. Perhaps it’s a sign you’re not making enough time for important routines like shopping and creating a healthy meal yourself. Maybe you’ve always had a belief that you’re a bad cook.

      Write a diary

      Write down your thoughts and feelings around this bad habit. Writing things down forces the brain to think harder.[2] This helps you to find the source to your stress or limiting negative beliefs.

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      Alternate: Find a replacement

        Find a positive alternative habit

        Once you think you’ve discovered your trigger, try to find a similar but healthy option. This is where I replaced Coke with lemon water; slouching with simply taking a walk and stretching my back every hour; and chilling at home after work with workout exercises that I actually found fun.

        You could decide to walk to the office instead of driving or getting off the bus earlier to walk. You could switch to a healthier breakfast cereal instead of grabbing a sugary snack when you head out of the door.

        By doing this, you aren’t getting rid of the act altogether like you would if you completely gave something up with nothing to fill that void. This helps your brain accept the improved habit more.

        Create a defence plan

        Everyone has moments of weakness and that want to revert back to the bad habit will rear its ugly head. This is where a plan can help counteract these moments.

        Think of things you can do when the temptations come. For example, if you want to check your phone less, ask your friend or partner to keep it for you or switch it off and read a book. If you’re a starter for an exercise routine, like me, get someone to do it with you to keep you accountable.

        Decide on something you will do once you feel triggered to go back to your old habit. Repeating these positive alternative habits consistently will help wire your brain to see them as your normal new habit over time.

        Delete: Remove temptations

          Remove stuff that reminds you of the bad habit

          Getting rid of anything that reminds you of your bad habit is essential. For example, I got rid of coke in my office and at home and replaced my usual office chair with an exercise ball. It makes it much easier to stop slipping back in a weak moment.

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          Avoid all kinds of temptations

          In the same vein, avoid places or people that you know will tempt you back into that bad habit. Don’t go to the supermarket on an empty stomach to avoid the temptation to buy trashy snacks, don’t drive past that fast food joint but find an alternative route instead, say no more often to the friend you know will get you drunk again this weekend.

          It’s all about not putting yourself in the situation where you’re in danger of relapsing.

          Conclusion

          The Control Alternate Delete Method uses the right steps you need to overcome your need to indulge in your bad habits. Working with your core psychology, emotions and feelings behind your actions is what makes this method effective and easy to apply to all bad habits you have.

          Bad habits are easy to form and making changes can seem difficult but remember that it’s all about consistency and repetition.

          Start using the Control Alternate Delete Method today and you can stop a bad habit permanently.

          What bad habit do you want to put a stop to once and for all? You must set aside time and pick one bad habit to focus on. Start using the steps to increase and maintain more positivity in your life moving forward.

          More Resources About Changing Habits

          Featured photo credit: Picjumbo via picjumbo.com

          Reference

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