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Getting Change Done: How to Deal with Resisting Change

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Getting Change Done: How to Deal with Resisting Change


    What do getting out of a bad job, leaving a bad marriage, and abandoning a really bad friendship all have in common?

    That’s right: they all require the thing we dread to do as human beings: Change.

    A change in perspective. A change in mindset. A change in thinking.

    We resist change, and we fear change, and we detest change, because no matter how bad the status quo may get, the fear of the unknown is enough to keep us at bay even if that unknown is the best thing that could happen to us.

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    We prefer the familiarity of the discomfort and pain to the uncertainty of a better life.

    This resistance to change kept me at bay for far too long at a miserable job and I have a feeling that if you are reading this too, it may be keeping you stuck too.

    So now that we can admit to our resistance to change, what on earth do we do about it?

    Well, you first have to better understand it before you do anything about it. Why do we resist change?

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    For one, we like normalcy and routine. A lot! It’s uncanny how well routine and human beings go together! We believe routine does us good. We therefore protect routine by avoiding change. We believe all change is a big bad scary monster waiting to jump out at us!

    I have a little secret for you, my dear: Not all change is created equal.

    Remind yourself that not all change is created equal, so what if you had a horrible experience with change last time, it is completely independent of your experience with a different change next time. The results of each change will depend on where you are in your life, and how you go about choosing to change. They depend on your reasons behind wanting this change, and also your reasons for resisting it. They depend on whether this is a change that impacts a small part of your lifestyle or a change on the grand scale of aligning with your life purpose.

    Analyze the change. Understand the change. Embrace and envision the change.

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    It is an amazing self-discovery process as you learn more how to break down your own resistance against change.

    Here are some examples of the different types of change you can experience:

    • Bad change: Going from doing well to doing poorly, financially-speaking.
    • Good change: Going from a sedentary lifestyle to waking up your body by adding in an exercise and healthy eating program.
    • Really bad change: Going from safe smart driving to fast and obnoxious driving just to be “hip” and “cool” among friends.
    • Really good change: Going from feeling sorry and trapped in your job to believing that you are unique and can offer plenty to the world, with all your strengths and talents, thank you very much!

    So you see, not all change is created equal, and some change can be oh so good for you. So be open to change! Stop being so terrified of change!

    In fact, stop being so scared and terrified all the time!

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    What if you had a momentary paradigm shift and chose to believe, just for kicks, the exact opposite of the norm: that your routine and boring job is actually killing you, little by little, and that only a drastic change in the direction of your values and your beliefs can save you?

    What if you thought this way for one day? Would you be more willing to give the right change a try then?

    Remember, not all change is created equal, and the right change can do wonders for your soul and your bottom line. Just think about it.

    (Photo credit: Changing Tree via Shutterstock)

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    Last Updated on January 13, 2022

    How to Use Travel Time Effectively

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    How to Use Travel Time Effectively

    Most of us associate travel and time with what we’re going to do one we get to our destination. Planning and mapping out what to do once you arrive can certainly make for a more pleasurable vacation, but there are things you can do while you are on your way that can make it even better.

    Sure, you can plan for the things you’re going to do on your vacation while you are travelling en route – but what about making use of that time for other things that you don’t usually do when you’re at home? You don’t need to have your gadgets with you to do it, and you can really connect with yourself if you take the time to manage your life while heading towards your vacation destination.

    Here are some great tips to help you with your time management while you travel, some of which are more conventional than others. Nonetheless, you can find out what works best for you and apply them accordingly depending on when and how you are travelling.

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    1. Take Your Time Getting There

    As I write this, I’m on a flight to San Francisco. Flying is the fastest way to get from place to place, and for many people it’s really the only way to travel.

    But I’ve often taken the train or ferry on trips so that I have extra time without distraction to get more done. I’m not worrying about navigation or lack of space to do what I want to do. Instead I’m able to focus on getting stuff done during the time I’ve got without feeling rushed. For example, when I took the train from Vancouver to Portland, it was an eight hour trip and I managed to get a ton of writing done and closed a lot of open loops. It also was less expensive than flying, which was a bonus.

    Sometimes taking the long way to get somewhere on vacation can be the best thing for you to get somewhere with your life.

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    2. Go Gadget-Free

    This is going to be a tough one for a lot of you. But why do you need to bring your gadgets with you when you go on vacation? It isn’t be a bad idea to leave all but one of them behind, and only pull out that one when you absolutely need to do so. In some countries, you’d be wise to be discreet with them anyway since flaunting them in front of those that are less fortunate than you isn’t a good practice. While it may not seem like flaunting to you, in different cultures it can definitely come across that way.

    If you can’t go gadget-free, then at least go Internet-free. If you use a task management app that requires syncing across your multiple devices to be effective, remember that if you only have the one device with you then it can be the “master device” for the time being and will store your data locally anyway. Just sync up when you get home.

    3. Reflect and Prepare

    Finally, going on any sort of excursion gives you the perfect opportunity to reflect on where you’ve been. The fact you have removed yourself from where you usually are can give you a perspective that you simply can’t get when you’re at home. You may want to journal your thoughts during this time – and by taking more time to get to your destination you’ll have more time to dig deeper into it.

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    After a period of reflection – however long that happens to be – you can then begin to not only prepare for the rest of your travels, you can prepare for the rest of what happens afterward. The reflection period is important, though. You need to really know where you’ve been in order to properly look at where you want to be. Time away from things gives you that chance.

    Conclusion

    Traveling isn’t always about where you’re going and how quickly you can get there. In fact, it’s rarely about that at all.

    More often it’s where you’re at in your head that will dictate how much you benefit from traveling. So don’t just go somewhere fast. Instead, take your time on the way there and take the time to connect with not only where you are but who are while you’re there.

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    If you do that, you’ll have a better chance to be who you want to be when you leave.

    Featured photo credit: bruce mars via unsplash.com

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