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Getting Change Done: How to Deal with Resisting Change

Getting Change Done: How to Deal with Resisting Change


    What do getting out of a bad job, leaving a bad marriage, and abandoning a really bad friendship all have in common?

    That’s right: they all require the thing we dread to do as human beings: Change.

    A change in perspective. A change in mindset. A change in thinking.

    We resist change, and we fear change, and we detest change, because no matter how bad the status quo may get, the fear of the unknown is enough to keep us at bay even if that unknown is the best thing that could happen to us.

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    We prefer the familiarity of the discomfort and pain to the uncertainty of a better life.

    This resistance to change kept me at bay for far too long at a miserable job and I have a feeling that if you are reading this too, it may be keeping you stuck too.

    So now that we can admit to our resistance to change, what on earth do we do about it?

    Well, you first have to better understand it before you do anything about it. Why do we resist change?

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    For one, we like normalcy and routine. A lot! It’s uncanny how well routine and human beings go together! We believe routine does us good. We therefore protect routine by avoiding change. We believe all change is a big bad scary monster waiting to jump out at us!

    I have a little secret for you, my dear: Not all change is created equal.

    Remind yourself that not all change is created equal, so what if you had a horrible experience with change last time, it is completely independent of your experience with a different change next time. The results of each change will depend on where you are in your life, and how you go about choosing to change. They depend on your reasons behind wanting this change, and also your reasons for resisting it. They depend on whether this is a change that impacts a small part of your lifestyle or a change on the grand scale of aligning with your life purpose.

    Analyze the change. Understand the change. Embrace and envision the change.

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    It is an amazing self-discovery process as you learn more how to break down your own resistance against change.

    Here are some examples of the different types of change you can experience:

    • Bad change: Going from doing well to doing poorly, financially-speaking.
    • Good change: Going from a sedentary lifestyle to waking up your body by adding in an exercise and healthy eating program.
    • Really bad change: Going from safe smart driving to fast and obnoxious driving just to be “hip” and “cool” among friends.
    • Really good change: Going from feeling sorry and trapped in your job to believing that you are unique and can offer plenty to the world, with all your strengths and talents, thank you very much!

    So you see, not all change is created equal, and some change can be oh so good for you. So be open to change! Stop being so terrified of change!

    In fact, stop being so scared and terrified all the time!

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    What if you had a momentary paradigm shift and chose to believe, just for kicks, the exact opposite of the norm: that your routine and boring job is actually killing you, little by little, and that only a drastic change in the direction of your values and your beliefs can save you?

    What if you thought this way for one day? Would you be more willing to give the right change a try then?

    Remember, not all change is created equal, and the right change can do wonders for your soul and your bottom line. Just think about it.

    (Photo credit: Changing Tree via Shutterstock)

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    Last Updated on June 1, 2021

    7 Signs That You’re Way Too Busy (And Need to Change That)

    7 Signs That You’re Way Too Busy (And Need to Change That)

    “Busy” used to be a fair description of the typical schedule. More and more, though, “busy” simply doesn’t cut it.

    “Busy” has been replaced with “too busy”, “far too busy”, or “absolutely buried.” It’s true that being productive often means being busy…but it’s only true up to a point.

    As you likely know from personal experience, you can become so busy that you reach a tipping point…a point where your life tips over and falls apart because you can no longer withstand the weight of your commitments.

    Once you’ve reached that point, it becomes fairly obvious that you’ve over-committed yourself.

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    The trick, though, is to recognize the signs of “too busy” before you reach that tipping point. A little self-assessment and some proactive schedule-thinning can prevent you from having that meltdown.

    To help you in that self-assessment, here are 7 signs that you’re way too busy:

    1. You Can’t Remember the Last Time You Took a Day Off

    Occasional periods of rest are not unproductive, they are essential to productivity. Extended periods of non-stop activity result in fatigue, and fatigue results in lower-quality output. As Sydney J. Harris once said,

    “The time to relax is when you don’t have time for it.”

    2. Those Closest to You Have Stopped Asking for Your Time

    Why? They simply know that you have no time to give them. Your loved ones will be persistent for a long time, but once you reach the point where they’ve stopped asking, you’ve reached a dangerous level of busy.

    3. Activities like Eating Are Always Done in Tandem with Other Tasks

    If you constantly find yourself using meal times, car rides, etc. as times to catch up on emails, phone calls, or calendar readjustments, it’s time to lighten the load.

    It’s one thing to use your time efficiently. It’s a whole different ballgame, though, when you have so little time that you can’t even focus on feeding yourself.

    4. You’re Consistently More Tired When You Get up in the Morning Than You Are When You Go to Bed

    One of the surest signs of an overloaded schedule is morning fatigue. This is a good indication that you’ve not rested well during the night, which is a good sign that you’ve got way too much on your mind.

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    If you’ve got so much to do that you can’t even shut your mind down when you’re laying in bed, you’re too busy.

    5. The Most Exercise You Get Is Sprinting from One Commitment to the Next

    It’s proven that exercise promotes healthy lives. If you don’t care about that, that’s one thing. If you’d like to exercise, though, but you just don’t have time for it, you’re too busy.

    If the closest thing you get to exercise is running from your office to your car because you’re late for your ninth appointment of the day, it’s time to slow down.

    Try these 5 Ways to Find Time for Exercise.

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    6. You Dread Getting up in the Morning

    If your days are so crammed full that you literally dread even starting them, you’re too busy. A new day should hold at least a small level of refreshment and excitement. Scale back until you find that place again.

    7. “Survival Mode” Is Your Only Mode

    If you can’t remember what it feels like to be ahead of schedule, or at least “caught up”, you’re too busy.

    So, How To Get out of Busyness?

    Take a look at this video:

    And these articles to help you get unstuck:

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    Featured photo credit: Khara Woods via unsplash.com

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