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4 Ways to Overcome Barriers to Change and Make New Habits Stick

4 Ways to Overcome Barriers to Change and Make New Habits Stick

    Will 2012 be a year for change or will you keep doing what you have always done?

    “It takes a touch of genius and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction.”

    Albert Einstein

    Seems obvious, only an idiot would try to keep doing the same thing and expect different results, no? But the truth is I’m guilty of it, my friends are guilty, my family are guilty and I guess each one of you reading this is also guilty of the syndrome. If change were easy we would all be different, more successful, healthier, fitter, stronger, slimmer, more intelligent and definitely more accomplished. But we are not. And here’s the reasons why.

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    Change is difficult.

    Change is uncomfortable.

    Most human beings resist change. The familiar becomes a false sense of security even if it is a bad habit or a behavior that doesn’t serve us. Fear prevents us from moving forward. The “what if” syndrome hits us. What if I lose money? What if it’s the wrong decision? What if I can’t keep it up? I say sod all the negatives,

    Change is necessary,

    Change is good,

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    Change is exciting, it’s thrilling, it’s energizing.

    Life is ever changing, it’s dynamic, no two moments are ever the same. Our bodies are different one moment to the next, so why would we try to keep things the same? Why not embrace the difference, the different emotions, the different experiences that is life?

    Successful Change

    The route to successful change is in the habits we create, it’s achieved by consistent small changes which add up to desired results.

    “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.”

    Aristotle

    If we are what we repeatedly do, then creating habits of what we want in our lives in the only way to go. But how do we create habits that stick? Most of us will have a New Year’s Resolution or 22 that haven’t quite worked out the way we planned; there are a number of reasons why this can happen.

    1. Lack of planning

    If you want anything to work well it must have a POA (Plan of Action) You need to put some thought into What, When, Why and any other question word you can think of. If you want to create the habit of exercise then you must decide what exercise, what days and for how long before you put your gear on. Failing to plan is setting yourself up to fail.

    2. Trying too much too soon

    When starting a new habit, you need to start small and do it often. If you want to create a habit of writing, the trick is to do a little every day. If you are what you repeatedly do, some day you can become a writer.

    3. Focusing on the wrong thing

    Many people without realizing focus on the wrong thing. Every year I would set the goal to lose weight and every year I would fail. Last year I finally realized why it wasn’t working. I spent a lot of time focusing on my rounded belly and feeling negative about how my diet wasn’t working. One morning in the shower I had an epiphany. I spent my life telling people to focus on the positive and to focus on what they want and here I was spending my time focusing on my the parts of my body I didn’t like instead of focusing on the healthy, strong lean body I was busy creating. I have finally lost the weight.

    4. Lack of Self Belief

    “If you think you can do a thing or think you can’t do a thing, you’re right.”

    Henry Ford probably didn’t realize how famous his quotation would become but he knew how true these words were. If you go to the trouble of setting a goal, do yourself a favor and believe in ability to achieve it. If your best friend told you they were going to change this year, this year was going to be different. This year they are going to stop doing what they have always done and do what needs to be done to achieve the changes that they want to achieve. Would you support your friend or would you doubt and discourage them with negative thoughts and words?

    Start being your own best friend start encouraging and believing in yourself. Nurture your attempts with positive supportive words and actions. You can do it this year. You will do it; you just have to believe and you are half way there.

    (Photo credit: Change Just Ahead Green Road Sign via Shutterstock)

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    Ciara Conlon

    Productivity coach, speaker, blogger and author of Chaos to Control, a Practical Guide to Getting Things Done

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    Last Updated on May 22, 2019

    Ditch Work Life Balance and Embrace Work Life Harmony

    Ditch Work Life Balance and Embrace Work Life Harmony

    How do you usually go about your day?

    Do you wake up in the morning, get ready for work, and then spend the whole day looking forward to being at home and unwinding?

    We often hear about work life balance – having a good balance between work and personal time. Whilst this may sound like a smart idea, it can also imply that we should dedicate at least half of our time to work–and sacrifice time for our “personal life”.

    To me, that seems…off balance. Because, the truth is, it’s nearly impossible to split your time equally between the two. And, you may end up stressing out if you’re not able to meet that expectation of balance.

    Instead, why not think of having work life harmony instead?

    With this mindset, you can actually integrate work into your life in a way that feels more complete. This way, you don’t need to view work and having personal time as separate.

    So, how do you achieve work life harmony?

    Work Life Harmony Explained

    The difference between work life balance and work life harmony is pretty simple.With the former, there is an implication that you have to sacrifice your “life” for work. But, this is the worst way to go about things! How can you truly be at peace in life if you dread 8 hours of your day?

    Work life harmony on the other hand, allows your work to be a part of your life. This means that you can choose to be happy both at home, and at work! Work no longer needs to be seen as the ‘bad’ or un-fun activity.

    Having work life harmony also ensures you’re truly present in whatever place you find yourself.

    Just take a look at Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon for example.

    He uses a non traditional approach to work by making time for breakfast every morning with his family, doesn’t set his alarm before going to bed, schedules surprisingly few meetings, and still puts aside a few minutes every day to wash his own dishes.

    He believes that all his staff should stop trying to achieve a ‘balance’ in their work and personal lives as that implies a trade off. Instead, he envisions a more holistic relationship between the two.

    As the world’s richest man, he must be doing something right!

    Rethink Time Management

    Now, when we think of striking a balance, we usually associate it with time, don’t we? How much time are we spending at work versus how much time are we spending in our personal lives?Are we taking enough time to be with our loved ones, to do meaningful activities with others or even for ourselves, or are we just dedicating all our time to work?

    This is the so-called-balance that many struggle with.

    With work life harmony, we learn to rethink time management. By re-assessing how you manage your time, you’ll have a lot more of it. It’s incredible how much time can get wasted over the period of a day–especially when you’re not accurately tracking it.

    Unfortunately, unless you’re consciously making an effort, your brain is not always the best at making accurate judgement calls when it comes to prioritizing. It tends to have a bias towards short term benefits and short term costs.

    As there are often many more options our brains link to short term benefit; when you’re trying to focus on a task that gives you a long term benefit, that task usually becomes low priority. This is otherwise known as Priority Chaos.

    In order to overcome this and be in better control of your time, identify the tasks that need the most focus to get accomplished. If it’s a big task, then it’s good to break it down into smaller bite-sized actions that will provide you with a clearer short term benefit.

    When setting up tasks, give yourself a time limit. The brain has a bias towards short term benefits, and your attention span is limited, so if your tasks are going to take ages to complete, you’ll end up losing focus… and wasting time.

    Once you have all your tasks written down, it’s time to prioritize them. Since you have a time limit, your focus should be on the top priority tasks. By doing this, you will already be able to get more done in less time at work!

    Have Passion for What You Do

    Managing your time is important in achieving that work life harmony. But, perhaps of greater importance, is loving what you do in life.One of the most effective ways to achieve a work life harmony is to really enjoy, or find a purpose, in what you do for a living. Even though everyone isn’t always lucky enough to find a position that pays them for pursuing their passion, you can strive to find meaning in what you are already doing, or pursue something new entirely!

    For example, say you work at an office that sells paper. While many people wouldn’t consider this a world changing pursuit, I beg to differ. Think of all the individuals in the world that rely on paper. From creative types to quantum physics experts, your role at your workplace brings incredible value to many many people all over the world. You will have, without a doubt, helped bring a new idea into existence. Several new ideas to be precise.

    So have a think about what you’re doing now. Is it something that allows you to embrace your passion?

    Or perhaps you might not even know what it is that you love or enjoy doing. Why not explore and reflect on what gives you joy and contentment? Is there an area or industry that you could see yourself exploring to experience that fulfillment?

    Can you find a deeper purpose in what you’re already doing?

    When you’re able to find meaning in your work, you’re that much closer to achieving work life harmony.

    Don’t Be Intimidated By Obstacles and Limitations

    Creating work life harmony is also about understanding yourself–which includes your limitations and past obstacles–as this allows you to become more resilient.

    If you never had to experience struggles, challenges or setbacks, then you would never be forced to adapt and mature. So in theory, having to face obstacles in life is actually quite necessary.

    Most of us think of setbacks and obstacles as negative. Though, if you’re able to maintain an optimistic attitude, you’ll almost always have a higher chance of success of overcoming those obstacles to reach your eventual goal.

    Your attitude towards setbacks will define the outcome of whether you rise from the challenge or remain stuck in it. So, in order to achieve work life harmony, it’s important to have a resilient attitude as challenges will always come your way–especially when you strive to integrate work into your life, and not a separate or dominant part of life.

    Delegate When You Need To

    Of course, when you want to increase productivity and minimize the time or effort spent, a great way to do so is to delegate!

    If you spend a lot of time doing tasks on your own that could be delegated to others (whether at work or at home) you’re losing a lot of precious free time that could otherwise be spent elsewhere.

    At the end of the day, we all have a limited amount of time. So we should all be striving to create a harmonious work and living situation where we can find meaning in all that we do.

    While an overall goal may be meaningful, not all of the milestones or tasks needed to get there may be meaningful. That’s because we have our strengths and weaknesses, likes and dislikes. Not every task is going to be enjoyable or easy to complete. That’s where delegation comes in.

    Delegation simply allows you to leverage time from an external source, thus giving you opportunities to increase your own quality of time. Keep in mind that delegation should be done with deliberate attention, otherwise you may end up over relying on others.

    If you find that you’re running into the problem of over delegating, then it may be time to re-evaluate your motivation for doing whatever it is that you’re doing.

    Embrace the Circle and Become Happier and More Productive

    Living in harmony is about feeling good about the ways in which you spend your time, despite how busy you may be.Your switch from work mode to a more personal mode should be effortless. It’s about integrating your personal life and the things you love into your busy work life!

    It all begins with the shift in perspective. Understanding what your passions are, and learning to be resilient, before taking a different approach to the way you manage your time and everyday tasks.

    These are steps that you can start taking to move away from balance to harmony. 

    Featured photo credit: Photo by Marten Bjork on Unsplash via unsplash.com

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