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10 Reasons Why Some People Will Never Succeed

10 Reasons Why Some People Will Never Succeed

In O.G Mandino’s The greatest salesman in the world, a very important fact was made which said that:

“two amongst a thousand wise men, will define success in the same words, yet failure is always described in one way. Failure is man’s inability to reach his goals in life whatever they may be.”

While success is relative, subjective, holds monetary and non- monetary value, failure is more a “one size fits all” recipe. Below are ten things people do to fail on purpose.

1. They don’t understand the value of time.

“Any successful entrepreneur knows that time is more valuable than money itself.” – Richard Branson

Unsuccessful people don’t value their time. They are everywhere, anywhere, anytime because they lack the ability to dedicate their time towards their goals. And year after year they make new promises which never come to fruition simply because they couldn’t be bothered to put in the time required towards their goals. Time management skills, learning how to say no and knowing what commitments to undertake, is a step towards great success in any area of our lives.

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time mygifdump
    Source:Mygifdumps.

    2. They don’t do things that are in alignment with their goals

    “It’s not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.” – Roy Disney.

    The more important a goal is, the higher it will be on your hierarchy of values and the more discipline and order you will have associated with it. The less important a goal is, the lower it will be on your hierarchy of values and the less discipline and more disorder you’ll have associated with it. Unsuccessful people have mistaken busyness with productivity. They are a part of everything but nothing which they do is in alignment to their values and their goals. Writing down in a journal what your gaols are and implementing strategies which can get you there will help you identify things that are not on par with where you are going.

    fatamy urban lift
      Source urbanlift

      3. They never step up to the plate

      “People seem to think that success in one area can compensate for failure in other areas, but can it really? True effectiveness requires balance” – Stephen Covey

      So your boss sucks and you really hate your job but this is no reason to slack and produce mediocre work. You’re getting paid to be there so do it right, life has this universal law of giving you what you put in. It’s just maturity and wisdom to pursuit excellence no matter the circumstances. Unsuccessful people are the ones who are okay with getting bad grades and won’t bother finding an effective studying method that will help their learning ability, because after all, being a student of distinction is less about how smart you are but more about how well you can plan and prepare, and that makes you feel smarter and that in itself produces great results.

      step up by mycompositionnotebook
        Source: mycompositionnotebook

        4. They have self-imposed limitations

        “You are what you are by what you believe” – Oprah Winfrey

        Unsuccessful people tend to say things like “I’m just not good with numbers”, “I just really hate studying”, and “I just don’t think I can run a successful business”. They put limits on themselves and excuse their behaviour but it’s really just a way of underachieving and aiming low enough to not miss. Get rid of the idea that you only have a specific set of skills and talents for specific tasks, stop thinking that you’re not as intelligent as the next person. What life requires of you is to make the most of yourself, for yourself, and for others.

        limit by wifflegifcom
          Source: wifflegif.com

          5. They are good at making excuses

          “If you can’t make it good, at least make it look good” – Bill Gates

          These are the people who will find reasons and logic as to why they can’t and why they shouldn’t. They sometimes mistake this abhorrent tendency for “just being realistic”. They lack imagination and always find ways to justify why something shouldn’t be but they never really try. The best remedy for this is to stop your mind when it’s about to start making the excuses and re-ignite the engine that has started it all.

          making excuses corinneswriting
            Source: corines writing

            6. They lack class

            “You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.” ― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

            Unsuccessful people usually tend to have no social IQ. They say things like “well at least I’m being honest” or “this is how I am, deal with it”. They don’t know how to treat other people and tend to be arrogant, for no apparent reasons most of the time. Nobody likes a big mouth, a show off, a humble boaster, or people who don’t know how to just say thank you when given a compliment. These traits are unbecoming and are not what true class acts are made of. Being nice and polite to people you like is easy, being nice and polite to someone you cannot tolerate or who you are in constant disagreement with – that is character. Learning how to speak to people is a skill only few have mastered. It has been said the best way to test a man’s character is by watching how he acts when standing in a very long queue and is met with bad service, how he handles Christmas lights and his reaction when you ruin their expensive items.

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            class by globalgrind
              Source: globalgrind

              7. They are procrastinators

              “Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone” ― Pablo Picasso

              The funny thing about this one is that they are usually self-proclaimed procrastinators. They see no shame in it. This goes back to them never understanding the value of time. They are okay with living a life that keeps up with yesterday. They live life as though they just have another one in the bank. Let’s just see how round one goes and if all else fails we press next or rewind or pause. Understanding that you start dying the moment you are born and wisdom to realize that every day is a gift and you owe it to yourself to do everything you can do in those twenty four hours because nothing’s ever promised today tomorrow.

              download 7
                Source: gifsoup

                8. They don’t’ take action

                “Do something today, your future self will thank you for” – Les Brown

                The simplicity of this rule of life may be why they disregard the magnitude of its effects. Unsuccessful people tend to ponder and leave footprints in the sands of time. They can talk a great game and they dream really big but they lack the courage to just go forth. Stop dreaming about what will be, dreams in themselves are not bad but get up, show up and DO something. Stop with the coffee shop meetings and go do something.

                cant collegetimes
                  Source: collegetimes

                  9. They can’t face adversity

                  “All sunshine and no rain makes a dessert” – Arabian Proverb

                  There was a shepherd boy, he was not a warrior and he was small in size. He looked at a giant and said “I will strike you down and cut off your head” and that is exactly what he did. The thing with challenges is, they’re only as big as we make them seem and as strong as our weakness will allow. Unsuccessful people have not understood this and they give up all too quickly because things got uncomfortable, things got a little bit rough, they want roses without the thorns, babies without labour and a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow without bearing the storm. Overcoming challenges not only bring us closer to our goals but they turn us into someone we never imagined existed. Don’t be afraid to conquer fears and to enter new territory, step out of your comfort zone and challenge yourself. In the midst of adversity courage is born. You’ll never know how strong you are if you’ve never had to fight and sometimes you might fail but at least you failed and proved to Goliath that he wasn’t quite the Giant he thought he was.

                  adversity by deliyachris
                    Source: deliyachris

                    10. They are apathetic

                    “So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth” -Revelation 3:16

                    Yes there are natural fence sitters. They never have an opinion about anything, they can’t make decisions and are over the border plain ignorant. They can’t hold smart conversations and are not open minded if it isn’t directly in relation to what they know. They think everyone should view life the way they view it. They are indifferent about everything and stand for nothing. They don’t read, they don’t educate themselves past “formal education” and they put no effort into how they present themselves. Even if they never achieve their highest potential this is okay with them because in a world so full of wonder and curiosity they have managed to find a way to be bored. Apathy is a silent killer. Find something that you are passionate about, even if you don’t get paid for it. Put your gift to use.

                    mean-girls 10 by Screencrush
                      Source: screencrunch                                                           

                      The people who are out there making things happen are not as extraordinary as we make them ought to be. They’re pretty plain and most of  the time after a second glance they’re not all that exceptional in any way but they’ve managed to get to where they are and stay there because they mastered the art of discipline and being the right person at the right time. Maybe you have so many things you want to complete and sometimes you feel so overwhelmed because, there’s just not enough time. Put the cell phone down, log off once in a while and stop minding everybody’s business and you’ll be amazed at the potential you’ll unlock.

                      mean girls thoughtcatalogu
                        Source: thoughtcatalogue

                        More by this author

                        Kayiba Mpoyi

                        Writer by birth

                        Don’t Wait for People’s Validation, Do It Yourself, Every Single Day 10 Reasons Why Some People Will Never Succeed Successful Businesses Use This Tool to Predict the Future and Get Ahead of Their Competitors 15 Signs You’re Doing Better You Think You Are The Key To Reaching Your Goals: Willpower And Planning

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                        Last Updated on November 15, 2019

                        How Do You Change a Habit (According to Psychology)

                        How Do You Change a Habit (According to Psychology)

                        Habits are hard to kill, and rightly so. They are a part and parcel of your personality traits and mold your character.

                        However, habits are not always something over-the-top and quirky enough to get noticed. Think of subtle habits like tapping fingers when you are nervous and humming songs while you drive. These are nothing but ingrained habits that you may not realize easily.

                        Just take a few minutes and think of something specific that you do all the time. You will notice how it has become a habit for you without any explicit realization. Everything you do on a daily basis starting with your morning routine, lunch preferences to exercise routines are all habits.

                        Habits mostly form from life experiences and certain observed behaviors, not all of them are healthy. Habitual smoking can be dangerous to your health. Similarly, a habit could also make you lose out on enjoying something to its best – like how some people just cannot stop swaying their bodies when delivering a speech.

                        Thus, there could be a few habits that you would want to change about yourself. But changing habits is not as easy as it seems, why?

                        What Makes It Hard To Change A Habit?

                        To want to change a particular habit means to change something very fundamental about your behavior.[1] Hence, it’s necessary to understand how habits actually form and why they are so difficult to actually get out of.

                        The Biology

                        Habits form in a place what we call the subconscious mind in our brain.[2]

                        Our brains have two modes of operation. The first one is an automatic pilot kind of system that is fast and works on reflexes often. It is what we call the subconscious part. This is the part that is associated with everything that comes naturally to you.

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                        The second mode is the conscious mode where every action and decision is well thought out and follows a controlled way of thinking.

                        A fine example to distinguish both would be to consider yourself learning to drive or play an instrument. For the first time you try learning, you think before every movement you make. But once you have got the hang of it, you might drive without applying much thought into it.

                        Both systems work together in our brains at all times. When a habit is formed, it moves from the conscious part to the subconscious making it difficult to control.

                        So, the key idea in deconstructing a habit is to go from the subconscious to the conscious.

                        Another thing you have to understand about habits is that they can be conscious or hidden.

                        Conscious habits are those that require active input from your side. For instance, if you stop setting your alarm in the morning, you will stop waking up at the same time.

                        Hidden habits, on the other hand, are habits that we do without realizing. These make up the majority of our habits and we wouldn’t even know them until someone pointed them out. So the first difficulty in breaking these habits is to actually identify them. As they are internalized, they need a lot of attention to detail for self-identification. That’s not all.

                        Habits can be physical, social, and mental, energy-based and even be particular to productivity. Understanding them is necessary to know why they are difficult to break and what can be done about them.

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                        The Psychology

                        Habits get engraved into our memories depending on the way we think, feel and act over a particular period of time. The procedural part of memory deals with habit formation and studies have observed that various types of conditioning of behavior could affect your habit formations.

                        Classical conditioning or pavlovian conditioning is when you start associating a memory with reality.[3] A dog that associates ringing bell to food will start salivating. The same external stimuli such as the sound of church bells can make a person want to pray.

                        Operant conditioning is when experience and the feelings associated with it form a habit.[4] By encouraging or discouraging an act, individuals could either make it a habit or stop doing it.

                        Observational learning is another way habits could take form. A child may start walking the same way their parent does.

                        What Can You Do To Change a Habit?

                        Sure, habits are hard to control but it is not impossible. With a few tips and hard-driven dedication, you can surely get over your nasty habits.

                        Here are some ways that make use of psychological findings to help you:

                        1. Identify Your Habits

                        As mentioned earlier, habits can be quite subtle and hidden from your view. You have to bring your subconscious habits to an aware state of mind. You could do it by self-observation or by asking your friends or family to point out the habit for your sake.

                        2. Find out the Impact of Your Habit

                        Every habit produces an effect – either physical or mental. Find out what exactly it is doing to you. Does it help you relieve stress or does it give you some pain relief?

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                        It could be anything simple. Sometimes biting your nails could be calming your nerves. Understanding the effect of a habit is necessary to control it.

                        3. Apply Logic

                        You don’t need to be force-fed with wisdom and advice to know what an unhealthy habit could do to you.

                        Late-night binge-watching just before an important presentation is not going to help you. Take a moment and apply your own wisdom and logic to control your seemingly nastily habits.

                        4. Choose an Alternative

                        As I said, every habit induces some feeling. So, it could be quite difficult to get over it unless you find something else that can replace it. It can be a simple non-harming new habit that you can cultivate to get over a bad habit.

                        Say you have the habit of banging your head hard when you are angry. That’s going to be bad for you. Instead, the next time you are angry, just take a deep breath and count to 10. Or maybe start imagining yourself on a luxury yacht. Just think of something that will work for you.

                        5. Remove Triggers

                        Get rid of items and situations that can trigger your bad habit.

                        Stay away from smoke breaks if you are trying to quit it. Remove all those candy bars from the fridge if you want to control your sweet cravings.

                        6. Visualize Change

                        Our brains can be trained to forget a habit if we start visualizing the change. Serious visualization is retained and helps as a motivator in breaking the habit loop.

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                        For instance, to replace your habit of waking up late, visualize yourself waking up early and enjoying the early morning jog every day. By continuing this, you would naturally feel better to wake up early and do your new hobby.

                        7. Avoid Negative Talks and Thinking

                        Just as how our brain is trained to accept a change in habit, continuous negative talk and thinking could hamper your efforts put into breaking a habit.

                        Believe you can get out of it and assert yourself the same.

                        Final Thoughts

                        Changing habits isn’t easy, so do not expect an overnight change!

                        Habits took a long time to form. It could take a while to completely break out of it. You will have to accept that sometimes you may falter in your efforts. Don’t let negativity seep in when it seems hard. Keep going at it slowly and steadily.

                        More About Changing Habits

                        Featured photo credit: Mel via unsplash.com

                        Reference

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