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How to Discuss Finances with Your Partner Without Killing Each Other

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How to Discuss Finances with Your Partner Without Killing Each Other

Money is often cited as the number one topic that couples fight about. This can be incredibly trying, especially when you and your significant other have different views about the ways that your money should be saved and spent. Listed below are a few ways that you can talk openly and honestly about money in your relationship, but of course, no two relationships are the same, so you might have to try several of these tactics in order to find the one that works best for you.

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    Understand Their Background

    Instead of fighting about money, first try to understand how your significant other grew up. Were they raised in a home where they were taught to pinch pennies? Or, were they raised in a home where they were able to buy whatever they wanted? Often, people have difficulty leaving their personal upbringing behind when it comes to creating their own way of managing money. We often mimic the money management systems that our parents use, which might not work when we bring another person into our lives. Understanding why they are the way that they are in terms of finances can help open the door for some clear conversations.

    Establish Trust

    Establishing trust is one of the most important things a couple can try to do when they are managing their money. This can be difficult since many people might wish to buy extravagant things without telling their partners, thus breaking their trust. At first, you might have to resort to only using cash and writing down what you spend, but you should be able to rebuild that trust eventually and communicating within the relationship will become easier.

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    Have a Common Goal

    We should all have some idea of the money we want to save and financial goals we want to achieve, be that taking a trip, paying off credit card debt, or something entirely unique . If you and your partner share the same goal (like a romantic vacation), working together to save the money for it can put a positive spin on managing money.

    Talk To a Financial Counselor

    There are many financial counselors who also specialize in helping relationships: you just need to do an Internet search to find one who can help you plan for your future and understand your partner’s goals and habits as well. Going to talk to a financial counselor can definitely be an intimidating experience, but people often feel so much better after they do, since financial counselors can give you realistic numbers of the amount of money you should be saving and spending. You’ll leave feeling informed, organized, and rejuvenated.

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    Have “Fun Money” Accounts

    Most of the arguments that couples have about finances are in regard to how each person should be spending money—most often, with one partner getting mad or upset that the other has purchased something they shouldn’t have. This can be avoided if each person has a specified amount of money that they can spend on whatever they like. If they want to save for a few months and buy an iPad, they can do that; if they want to spend it all right away on a hundred packs of M&Ms, they can do that too. The important thing is that each person can decide what to do with his or her own “fun money”—this establishes trust and allows each person to get what he or she wants (within reason).

    Manage it Together

    If you find that you and your partner consistently argue about money, it’s time to get organized. Sit down together once a week for a budget meeting so each person is fully aware of how much each other has, and what needs to be done each week to keep your budget in check. This type of meeting can really keep the lines of communication open and encourage each of you to stay accountable for the amount of money you spend.

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    Track Your Money

    Getting into the habit of writing down everything you buy will help you to be aware of your spending patterns, and so much more. Pretty soon, you will consider each purchase and ask yourself if you want to write it down—this keeps you from spending needlessly. If both you and your partner get into this habit, you can be well on your way to attaining financial freedom and having fewer arguments about money.

    The tips and techniques above are not for everyone, and I’m not a relationship expert. I do know from experience, however, that utilizing at least one of them can help your relationship to be more open, honest, and understanding. Every relationship has trying times now and then, and these tips can help you to avoid some of the tensions that can arise when you disagree about money.

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    Catherine Alford

    Catherine is the go to personal finance expert for educated, aspirational moms who want to recapture their life passions.

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    Last Updated on July 20, 2021

    Financial Freedom is Not a Fantasy: 9 Secrets to Get You There

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    Financial Freedom is Not a Fantasy: 9 Secrets to Get You There

    Have you ever considered your life now, and how it would be if you had more time to spend with your family and less worries about money?

    Nowadays, financial stress is one of the most troublesome weights in life. If you’ve ever encountered financial stress, you know the difficulty of not having enough income to pay your obligations or bills.

    Many people say that money is not the ultimate goal of life. While that’s true, money certainly plays a very significant role. The meaning of financial freedom changes with the different phases of our life, but ultimately, it is something that many people strive for.

    In this article, we’ll explain how to capture that financial freedom you’ve been looking for. Read on to learn the secrets to financial freedom.

    Break Free of Your Finances

    Financial freedom is about having a constant flow of cash from your assets to cover all your regular needs.

    When you are not worried about your income, or living paycheck to paycheck, you gain a great sense of freedom. It’s the freedom to be obtain and do what you truly need to make your way through everyday life.

    Gaining financial freedom, though, is a process of growth, making small improvements and gaining emotional strength.

    Though it seems hard to believe, it is really very simple to get financial freedom.

    To do so, you simply need to make sure that your assets exceed your liabilities. In other words, you’ll need to find the sweet-spot where your residuals meet or surpass your expenses. This is something that you can achieve with the proper plan.

    While not every person will accomplish financial freedom, the potential for anyone to do so is certainly there. Anyone can achieve this success, regardless of their income level.

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    Outlined below are 9 secrets that will help you in your goals of achieving financial freedom.

    1. Stop Unnecessary Spending

    We often spend money inwardly, instead of objectively.

    For example, you may spend when you’re anxious, depressed, restless, exhausted, from fear of missing out, or to please others. This is a very unhealthy way to handle your finances.

    To stop this habitual spending, log down all your spending over the course of a month.

    Just as some people keep a food diary, keep an expense diary. Remember not to just write down how much and what you spent the money on, also include the circumstances of why you spent the money. Was it an impulse buy at the checkout line or was it something you planned to purchase?

    This increased self-awareness could enable you to avoid triggering situations in the future when you are considering an impulse buy.

    2. Plan a Monthly Budget

    This is a great opportunity to get serious.

    Take a seat with your spouse or partner and make a monthly budget based on your income, not your expenses. You are never again going to spend more cash then you have on hand.

    Overspending is the thing that led you to more financial obligations. Make sure you decide every month what is coming in and what will be going out and stick to that budget… no matter what.

    3. Cut-up Credit Cards

    Perhaps you are the type of person who always pays your credit card balance in full before the end of your billing cycle, and enjoys the reward points you gain. If this is the case, then you’re already way ahead of the game.

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    If not, you may want to consider ridding your life of the burden that credit cards bring.

    Many cards have strategies set up so that if you make a certain number of late payments, they will raise your interest rate much higher. This can really add up in the long run and you won’t be doing your financial situation any favors. If you’re prone to late payments or have a large balance due on your cards, cut them up!

    Without proper self control on credit card spending and payments, you are basically throwing your money away. To ensure that you have better control over your spending, use only cash or debit for all future purchases (and don’t forget to pay at least your minimum payment on your cut-up cards each month!).

    4. Increase Savings

    There is no doubt that for a comfortable retirement you must accumulate satisfactory savings throughout your working life.

    It’s good practice to save up to 15% of your income.

    Start with your workplace 401(k), if you have one. If not, a Roth IRA (if you are eligible) or a traditional IRA (if you are not eligible for the Roth) are the next logical steps.

    Increase in longevity means you might be able to look forward to 25 to 30 years in retirement, or possibly even significantly more. Investing now in good retirement plans will ensure that you have a guaranteed a stable monthly income when the time comes to stop working. [1]

    5. Invest Wisely

    Consider investing in funds.

    Specifically, you will gain higher returns if you invest in different types of mutual funds such as Debt funds, Equity funds and Hybrid funds with a proper balance, although it absolutely relies on your personal preferences and sense of risk taking.

    To get the most of these benefits, make sure you are investing in a variety of assets. Another resource of investing in mutual funds is SIP (Systematic Investment Plan) where you invest some money every month in funds. SIP works by averaging the per unit price of the stock.

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    Mutual fund investors are aware of the benefits of an SIP (Systematic Investment Plan). For one, it is the most secure way to invest in equity mutual plans so that wealth is created over a long period of time. This plan also helps you to gain a better sense of financial discipline, which will come in handy in all your financial endeavors.

    6. Invest in Gold

    There isn’t really a better way to invest in gold than to have the physical gold itself in your possession.

    You can purchase gold coins and bars from mints as well as from coin dealers and other private sellers.

    Another way to invest in gold is through ETFs (Exchange Traded Funds).

    These are is similar to mutual funds but they are exclusively investments of gold. ETFs are great because they offer more liquidity; the ETF owns the actual physical gold, stores it, and retains the value of the shares. These shares can then be bought and sold in the stock market, and one big benefit is that the transaction costs of gold ETFs are much lower than the that of physical gold.

    With its consistently-increasing demand, investment in gold can be very wise long-term investment to make.

    7. Stash Emergency Funds

    Whether it’s a cash gift or a work bonus, always try to save any extra money that comes your way rather than making unneeded purchases.

    If you get paid every other week, you’ll get an “extra” paycheck (three rather than the usual two) twice a year. Either save those paychecks towards your emergency funds or utilize the money to pay down other obligations, such as loans, credit cards or other debts.

    Make it hard to get your cash.

    Put your savings in an alternate bank, maybe an online bank that forces you to delay for several business days before transferred money hits your regular bank account.

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    8. Find Fabulous Mentors

    Find a mentor, such as a friend or family member, who has exceptional control over their finances and pay attention to everything they do.

    If you do not have any friends or family that are enjoying financial freedom, then find a mentor online! There are numerous blogs and guru websites featuring the advice of many people who have reached financial freedom, and they exist primarily to let you in on how to achieve it for yourself.

    There are also plentiful forums available that share tips and tricks on how to best achieve financial freedom. Read as much as you can and start changing your habits for the better.

    9. Be Extra Patient

    Patience is the key of financial success.

    Being patient can be quite tough, especially when you’re struggling with your finances, but having faith is worth it. You’ll continuously be on the right track if you are taking the proper steps above.

    So don’t be discouraged, even if you are only saving a few dollars a month; it all adds up. Within just a few years you’ll look back proudly at your accomplishments and be glad that you had the patience to get there.

    Financial Freedom for All

    Anyone can achieve financial freedom, regardless of their financial circumstance.

    Use the tips provided above to get yourself on the track to financial freedom and toss your monetary concerns out the window. If you wish to achieve a life with financial freedom for yourself and your family then you must adopt a disciplined approach towards your finances.

    Following the simple secrets above is a great start to making your money work for you, so you can work less and live more!

    Featured photo credit: rawpixel via unsplash.com

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    Reference

    [1] Hartford Gold Group: IRA Retirement Accounts

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