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9 Money Habits Happy Couples Have

9 Money Habits Happy Couples Have

It has become general knowledge that half the marriages in North American end in divorce. It makes us all wonder what it takes to have a happy long-term relationship.

There is good news. According to Kansas State University researcher, Sonya Britt, arguing about money is the top predictor of divorce. How is that good news? Well, if you master your personal finances and get on the same page with your partner about your shared finances, then you’ll have overcome the number one obstacle in relationships.

What do happy couples do differently? Here are the nine smart money habits they share:

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1. They talk about money

For many couples, it’s easier to talk about sex than to talk about money. Based on their upbringing, money can be a sensitive topic because it can trigger feelings of inadequacy or shame centered around not having a financial plan, around spending too much or around not earning or saving enough. Happy couples set aside time to talk about money and set goals around each partner’s and the shared money.

2. They understand each other’s money type

Are they hoarders when it comes to money? Are they big spenders? Are they come-what-may hippies? Or are they avid spreadsheet crunchers? According to author Jordan Goodman, in the book Master Your Money Type, there are six psychological money types. Happy couples understand their own money type and their partner’s. They don’t try to change the other person. They only strive to find a middle ground.

3. They have a joint bank account

Happy couples share a joint bank account that covers common basic necessities, such as rent or mortgage payments, utilities, groceries, toiletries, etc. They both automate their monthly contributions to this join bank account, in proportion to their income. They even align what to do if or when one of them isn’t earning an income.

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4. They have separate bank accounts

In addition to a joint bank account, they each have their own separate bank accounts and credit cards. Happy couples know the value of independence, freedom of choice, mutual trust and personal respect. They don’t stalk each other’s every move and purchase. Separate bank accounts also leaves room for personal growth, personal responsibility and surprise birthday gifts!

5. They understand each other’s love languages

What does love have to do with money? According to Dr Gary Chapman, in his New York Times bestselling The Five Languages of Love, people express love through quality time, physical touch, acts of service, words of affirmation, or gifts. For example, if one partner spends a lot of money buying gifts to show affection while another just wants to talk long walks together, then the first can be perceived as a frivolous spender and the second as a cheap-ass. Understanding each other’s love language helps happy couples understand their partner’s internal motivator for spending, saving, and investing money.

6. They have a security blanket

Nothing stresses a relationship more than financial insecurity. On Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, security – including financial security – is more important than love and belonging. Happy couples budget, follow their budget and create a financial security blanket that keeps them feeling secure, optimistic, and carefree. It doesn’t mean they deprive themselves of fun or material goods, it simply means they don’t spend money that they don’t have.

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7. They know that money is a means, not an end

Happy couples understand that money is a means, a way to exchange goods and services. They know that ultimately, money won’t give them fulfillment and purpose. They use money to acquire assets, to travel and experience the world, and to support continued learning and healthy lifestyle. Happy couples aren’t materialistic. They don’t feel the need to keep up with the Jones.

8. They set aside fun money

All wealth mastery gurus point to delayed gratification as a key to long-term wealth. Yet, happy couples set aside fun money, an amount of disposable income that requires no thought or consideration before spending. Tapping into the fun money barrel prevents needless arguments and stress on the relationship.

9. They have balance

They are frugal, but don’t hoard money. They are generous, but not reckless with money. They appreciate spreadsheets, but don’t let numbers rule their lives. They gracefully walk the fine line between work and play and the fine line between saving, spending, and investing.

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So, what will it be? Open and curious conversations around money or avoid money issues until they implode? Happy couples treat money as a means to an end, not a character flaw or personality trait. They approach it with a smile and look for alignment of their common goals, rather than agreement of their personal preferences.

What habits will you implement to keep your relationship happy and prosperous?

Featured photo credit: http://compfight.com via farm3.staticflickr.com

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Published on October 8, 2018

13 Incredibly Useful Tactics to Help You to Stick to Your Family Budget

13 Incredibly Useful Tactics to Help You to Stick to Your Family Budget

Are you having trouble sticking to a family budget? You aren’t alone.

Budgeting is difficult. Creating one is hard enough, but actually sticking to it is a whole other issue. Things come up. Desires and cravings happen. And the next thing you know, budgets break.

So how can you stick to a family budget? Here are 13 tips to make it easier.

1. Choose a major category each month to attack

As the saying goes, “Rome wasn’t built in a day.” With that in mind, one approach to help you get into the habit of sticking to a budget is simply starting slow.

Spend too much on Starbucks runs, eat out too often, and have an out-of-this-world grocery bill? Choose one bad habit and attack.

By choosing one behavior to focus on, you’ll prevent yourself from being overwhelmed. You’ll also experience small victories, which help you gain positive momentum. This momentum can then carry over into your overall budget.

2. Only make major purchases in the morning

If you’re making large purchases in the evening, there’s a good chance you’re doing so after a long day and you’re probably tired.

Why does this matter? Because our judgement tends to be off when tired – our willpower is compromised.

Instead, only make major purchasing decisions in the morning when you’re energized and refreshed. Your brain will be firing on all cylinders and your resolve will be high. You’re less likely to give in and settle at this point.

3. Don’t go to the grocery store hungry

Have trouble with impulse buys at the grocery store? If so, there’s a good chance you’re going grocery shopping while hungry.

The problem here is that when you’re hungry, everything looks good. So you’re more likely to make split decisions on things that aren’t on your grocery list.

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Instead, make sure you eat prior to your grocery store trip. Then take your list, along with your full stomach, and go shopping. Notice how food doesn’t look quite so good when you’re not fighting cravings.

4. Read one-star reviews for products

Is there a product you just have to have (but maybe not really)? Check out the one-star reviews.

By reading all the horrible reviews, you may be able to basically trick yourself into deciding that the product isn’t worth your time and money.

Next thing you know, you didn’t make the purchase, you saved the money, and you feel good about the decision.

5. Never buy anything you put in an online shopping cart until the next day

If you are making a purchase online, it’s typically a two-step process. First, you click “Add to Cart” and then you go in to review your cart and pay.

The problem is that there not typically much reviewing during step two. It’s generally click pay and there you go. However, this is the perfect point to stop for reflection.

Once you add to your cart, your best bet is to step away until the next day. Let the item sit there and grow cold, so to speak.

This gives you a night to “sleep on it” and decide if you really want and need to spend that money. If you wake up the next day and still find the purchase viable, then perhaps it’s time to go for it.

6. Don’t save your credit card info on any site you shop on

One of the other pitfalls of shopping online is that fact that most sites ask you to save your credit card information.

While the sites will frame it as a method of convenience, the truth is they know you’ll spend more money in the long run if your credit card information is saved.

The “convenience” takes away one last decision-making point in the purchasing process. True, it’s a pain to get out your credit card and enter the information every time. But guess what? That’s the point. If that inconvenience helps you stay on budget, then it’s worth it. Which leads into the next tip.

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7. Tape an “impulse buy” reminder to your credit card

Credit cards make spending much easier than cash. When you spend cash, you can literally see your wallet emptying. A credit card comes out, then goes back in. No harm, no foul.

That’s why it’s a good idea to tape a reminder to your credit card. Customize a message that is something along the lines of “do you really need this?” or “does it fit the budget?”

That way when you pull out the card, you get one last reminder to help you question your decision and stick to your budget.

8. Only use gift cards to shop on Amazon

Amazon is probably the easiest place online to blow money. It’s just so easy to click and buy. However, one way you can slow the process down is buy only using gift cards. Here’s how it works.

If you plan on making a purchase on Amazon, go to the grocery store and purchase a pre-loaded Amazon gift card of the proper amount. There’s no convenience fee, so you literally pay for the money you’ll spend.

Now take that gift card home and load it to your Amazon account. There’s your money to spend.

Why does this help? It makes you have to purposely go to the score and purchase the card in order to purchase the item. That’s a pretty deliberate thing that takes some time, commitment, and thought.

This process will effectively kill the impulse buy.

9. Budget using cash and envelopes

As mentioned earlier, it’s a lot harder to spend cash than swipe a credit card. You can take this even farther by using only cash, and separating that cash by budget category.

Create an envelope for each category and stick the cash in there at the beginning of each month. When the envelope is empty, no more spending on that category, unless you borrow from another (be careful of that approach).

This can be pretty helpful for people that have a hard time following transactions in their checking account, or keeping a budgeting spreadsheet.

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The envelopes simplify the tracking process, leaving no room for error. Nothing hides from you because it’s tangible in the envelopes in front of you.

10. Join a like-minded group

Making the decision to stick to something like budgeting is difficult. It takes long-term commitment.

You’re going to feel weak sometimes. And sometimes you may fail. That said, support from others can help strengthen resolve.

Support can come from a spouse or a friend, but they won’t always have the exact same goal in mind. That’s why it’s a good idea to join a support group that’s likeminded.

No need to pay here, as there are tons of free communities that fit the bill online.

For example, reddit has multiple subreddits that deal with budgeting and frugal living. You can follow, subscribe, and get active in those communities.

This will open your eyes to new tips and strategies, keep your goal fresh on your mind, and help you realize there are others dealing with the same struggles and being successful.

11. Reward Yourself

When you set a budget, it’s usually with a large goal in mind. Maybe you want to be debt free, or perhaps you want to see $10,000 in your savings account.

Whatever the case, the end goal is great, but the end is often far away, making it hard to see the end of the tunnel.

With that in mind, it’s a good idea to set mini-goals along the way. This helps you still look at the big picture but have something that’s attainable in the short-term to help with momentum.

But don’t stop there – set rewards for yourself when you reach that small goal. Maybe it’s an extra meal out. Or a new pair of shoes.

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Whatever the case, this gives you something in the near future to look forward to, which can help with the fatigue that can result in pursuing long-term goals.

12. Take the Buddhist approach

You don’t have to be a Buddhist to recognize some of the wisdom in the teachings. One of the tenets of the philosophy involves accepting that we can’t have everything we want. And that’s okay.

Sometimes you won’t feel good. Sometimes you’ll have cravings. You can’t deny them. But you can recognize them, accept them, and let them pass by. Then you move on.

Apply this to the times you want to do things that will break your budget. You’re going to have the desire to eat out when you shouldn’t. You might want to stay out and spend too much at happy hour with your work friends.

The feelings will come. Recognize them, accept them, but let them go.

13. Set up automatic drafts to savings

If you wait until you’ve spent all your budgeted money to deposit money into savings, guess what? You probably aren’t going to put any money into savings.

It’s too easy to see that as extra money and end up using it to treat yourself.

Instead, set up automatic savings withdrawals. That way, the money is marked and gone before you can even think about it. It becomes a non-issue. It’s no longer “extra.” It’s just savings.

Conclusion

Sticking to a budget can be difficult. No one is denying that.

However, if you can do a few things to set yourself up for success, and put some practices in place to curb impulse buys, then you can (and will!) be successful sticking to your family budget.

Featured photo credit: rawpixel via unsplash.com

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