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How to Create Your Life Story Exactly How You Want it to Be

How to Create Your Life Story Exactly How You Want it to Be

We all have a life story we're trying to live. But the thing is that we never know how long we have to tell it, meaning it's that much more challenging to create your life story as you want it to be.

For example, I'm sure you've heard that the world is going to end this year. Well…probably. Okay…maybe not.

There is quite a bit of debate about it, but I think most agree that it probably isn't going to literally end. It may, instead, be the end of an era.

But what if the world really did end on December 21? Where would you want to be? Who would you want to spend your last few minutes with? What would you want to be doing?

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that you wouldn't want to be fighting with your spouse. Or yelling at your kids, or doing something mundane like watching old reruns on TV. You would like to be doing something significant and meaningful. You would like to have a special moment.

And who says you will? Statistics.

If you spend a lot of time currently fighting with your spouse or engaging in power struggles, pushing their buttons or bumping heads, statistics says there's a very high probability you will die that way. If you spend more time thinking loving thoughts about your spouse and you frequently show your appreciation for him/her, then that is more likely to be the theme playing out when the world ends. If you work a lot, frankly, you're pretty likely to die at your desk checking email. >shudder<

Activities you do frequently become habits. Breaking a habit takes a concerted effort. All activities have attitudes behind them, and those attitudes are fueled by beliefs. Beliefs are simply thoughts that you keep thinking, so why not change your thoughts? What attitudes or beliefs might be making you do the things you do?

Suppose you often fight with your spouse and you love to push his/her buttons. However, you can see that once you get going, he/she pushes yours and the two of you end up fighting. What attitude is behind your desire to push those buttons? Are you simply looking for a reaction? Are you angry about something else you are afraid to talk to him/her about? Are you frustrated with the lack of control you feel you have in your life? Are you frustrated because you feel like you are being manipulated? Spend a few minutes and boldly go where you haven't gone before — what are the attitudes or beliefs behind your actions? (Don't get sidetracked trying to analyze your spouse.)

Once you see a belief, you can look it in the eye and decide if you want to keep it. Beliefs, although often handed down to us from our parents, are optional. You can choose what you want to continue to believe and what beliefs you want to change. They are not facts! You can change a belief at any time, and if you want to do so, you have several options. You can punch holes in the belief with facts or things you know to be true. Ultimately, you will have to think new thoughts to counter the belief and replace it. Every time it pops up, you will need to remind yourself of your new thoughts/belief, so make some notes to yourself and do some journaling. This is similar to breaking a habit, and it could take up to three weeks to change, but keep at it.

Whether or not the world ends in December or not, we will all have a moment when it's time for us to go. Death is a part of life, and life is all about the invisible treasures — sweet moments with loved ones, memories of happy times and silly kids. You have the power to create your life story — and death story — exactly how you want it to be.

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Last Updated on December 9, 2019

5 Simple Ways to Relieve Stress Effectively

5 Simple Ways to Relieve Stress Effectively

Everyone experiences mental stress at one time or another. Maybe you’re starting a new career, job, or business, or you feel incredibly overwhelmed between work, parenting, and your love life (or a lack of it). It could even be that you simply feel that you have way too much to do and not enough time to do it,  plus, on top of everything, nothing seems to be going the way it should!

Yup, we all experience mental stress from time-to-time, and that’s okay as long as you have the tools, techniques and knowledge that allow you to fully relieve it once it comes.

Here are 5 tips for relieving mental stress when it comes so you can function at your best while feeling good (and doing well) in work, love, or life:

1. Get Rationally Optimistic

Mental stress starts with your perception of your experiences. For instance, most people get stressed out when they perceive their reality as “being wrong” in some way. Essentially, they have a set idea of how things “should be” at any given moment, and when reality ends up being different (not even necessarily bad), they get stressed.

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This process is simply a result of perception and can be easily “fixed” by recognizing that although life might not always be going as YOU think it should, it’s still going as it should—for your own benefit.

In fact, once you fully recognize that everything in your life ultimately happens for your own growth, progress, and development—so you can achieve your goals and dreams—your perception works in your favor. You soon process and respond to your experience of life differently, for your advantage. That’s the essence of becoming “rationally optimistic.”

The result: no more mental stress.

2. Unplug

Just like you might need to unplug your computer when it starts acting all crazy, you should also “unplug” your mind.

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How on earth do you unplug your mind? Simple: just meditate.

It isn’t nearly difficult or complicated as some people think, so, if you don’t already meditate, give it a try. Whether you meditate for 5 minutes, 30 minutes, or 2 hours, this is a surefire way to reduce mental stress.

Meditation has been scientifically proven to relax your body (resulting in less mental stress), while also reducing anxiety and high blood pressure.

3. Easy on the Caffeine

Yes, we know, we know—everyone loves a nice java buzz, and that’s okay, but there’s a fine line between a small caffeine pick-me-up and a racing heart and mind that throws you into a frenzy of mental stress.

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Try giving up caffeine for a while and see how you feel. And, if that’s completely out of the question for you, at least try to minimize it. You might find that lots of your mental stress mysteriously “disappears” as your caffeine intake goes down.

4. Attack Mental Stress Via the Back Door

That’s right: your body and mind are part of the whole being, and are constantly influencing and affecting each other. If you’re experiencing a lot of mental stress, try to reduce it by calming your body down—a calm body equals a calmer mind.

How do you calm your body down and reduce physical stress? A  great way to reduce physical stress (thereby reducing mental stress) is to take natural supplements that are proven to reduce stress and anxiety while lifting your mood. Three good ones to look into are kava-kava, St John’s wort, and rhodiola rosea:

  • Kava-kava is a natural plant known to have mild sedative properties, and you should be able to find it at your natural health food store or vitamin store. It’s available in capsules or liquid extract form.
  • St John’s wort is a natural flower used to treat depression. Again, it’s found at your local health store in capsules or liquid. Because it uplifts mood (enabling you to see the brighter side of all experiences) it helps relieve mental stress as well.
  • Rhodiola rosea is a natural plant shown to reduce stress and uplift mood, and Russian athletes have been using it forever. Like the other two supplements mentioned, rhodiola rosea can be found at your natural health store in capsule or liquid form.

While these supplements are all natural and can be very helpful for most people, always check with your health care provider first as they can cause side-effects depending on your current health situation etc.

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5. Good Old-Fashioned Exercise

This tip has been around forever because it works. Nothing relieves mental stress like running, kickboxing—you name it. Anything super-physical will wipe out most of your mental stresses once the exercise endorphins (happy chemicals) are released into your brain.

The result: mental stress will be gone!

So, if you’re feeling overwhelmed or just plain stressed, try using some of the above tips. You can even print this out or save it to refer to regularly.

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Featured photo credit: Radu Florin via unsplash.com

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