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What’s Your Brand of Courage?

What’s Your Brand of Courage?
    Photo credit: Quinn Dombrowski (CC BY-SA 2.0)

    Starting a business takes courage. You have to do the job of six people at once, deal with income that is variable at best, and non-existent at worst, and face all the other risks that come with walking where most others don’t dare to tread.

    But that’s old news – anyone who’s been doing this for any length of time knows what’s involved, and has chosen to keep on going. So the question is: Why is it so hard? Why is it that in spite of the good days and the successes, there are so many nights that we feel tired and beaten, wondering where our courage has gone?

    The answer is that the courage you need to get started is very different from the courage that you need to keep on going. When you’re just starting out, you need courage that is flashy and fiery – the kind that involves great leaps and inspiring speeches. To keep on going, you need a much less dramatic courage in the face of a far more exhausting reality. This kind of courage is much harder to come by.

    Let’s start by understanding what we’re really talking about…

    Flashy and Fiery: Braveheart Courage

    The first kind of courage is Braveheart Courage, which I’ve named after Mel Gibson’s popular film.

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    This is the kind of courage that you read about in storybooks – the courage to take a stand against great adversity, face the monsters and confront overwhelming odds.

    This is the kind of courage that is called for in the darkest moments with the most at stake, and it takes great strength of character to muster it up and get going.

    But while this courage can get you going, it can’t keep you going over a long stretch of time.

    Braveheart Courage is like gearing up to write a term paper in 24 hours; it’s doable, but you can’t keep that pace going for an entire semester – not just because you’ll get tired and run out of steam, but because an entrepreneur’s journey is more like a four year degree program than one brutal weekend of cramming.

    And the degree program calls for a very different kind of courage…

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    Day after Day: Shawshank Courage

    Shawshank courage is the kind of courage exemplified in the Shawshank Redemption.

    In that film, Tim Robbins’ character is convicted of a crime that he didn’t commit, and sentenced to life in prison. Despite losing everything in his life, his spirit never wavers, and he digs his way to freedom, one spoonful of dirt at a time, over the course decades.

    Braveheart Courage can get you to cannonball dive into a cold ocean, but Shawshank Courage will keep you swimming for hours and hours until you make it to shore. We relate best to examples, so here are some examples Shawshank Courage:

    Now tell me – what kind of courage does an entrepreneur need? And which is harder to cultivate?

    I think it’s Shawshank Courage – but where does it come from?

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    “Courage Doesn’t Always Roar…”

    As difficult as it is, there are many wells from which you can draw strength and courage when you don’t have the strength to take even one more hopeless step.

    You can think of your family, friends, business partners, and community – the faith that they’ve placed in you, and the love and support that they offer.

    You can think of those who struggle even harder than you do, against far greater odds, and with far less to work with than you do.

    You can think of what you’re doing it all for – the goals that you want to achieve, the life that you are working to provide for your family, and the impact that you’re trying to make in the world.

    And if all fails, you think of a quote that has held me in very good stead, from Mary Anne Radmacher, who says that “Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying ‘I will try again tomorrow’.”

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    Write it down, and put it up on your wall. You can even get a fancy, framed version if you like.

    The next time you feel that you need a little help trying again tomorrow, read that note, and remember that this is what courage is really about.

    Then say in a quiet voice that you’ll try again tomorrow.

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    Last Updated on December 2, 2019

    10 Powerful Ways to Stop Worrying and Start Living Today

    10 Powerful Ways to Stop Worrying and Start Living Today

    Plato knew that the body and mind are intimately linked. And in the late 1800s, the Mayo brothers, famous physicians, estimated that over half of all hospital beds are filled with people suffering from frustration, anxiety, worry and despair. Causes of worry are everywhere, in our relationships and our jobs, so it’s key we find ways to take charge of the stress.

    In his classic book How to Stop Worrying and Start Living, Dale Carnegie offers tools to ditch excessive worrying that help you make a worry-free environment for your private and professional life.

    These are the top 10 tips to grab worry by the horns and wrestle it to the ground:

    1. Make Your Decision and Never Look Back

    Have you ever made a decision in life only to second-guess it afterwards? Of course you have! It’s hard not to wonder whether you’ve done the right thing and whether there might still be time to take another path.

    But keep this in mind: you’ve already made your decision, so act decisively on it and dismiss all your anxiety about it.

    Don’t stop to hesitate, to reconsider, or to retrace your steps. Once you’ve chosen a course of action, stick to it and never waver.

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    2. Live for Today, Package Things up in “Day-Tight Compartments”

    You know that feeling: tossing, turning and worrying over something that happened or something that might, well into the wee hours. To avoid this pointless worrying, you need “day-tight compartments”. Much as a ship has different watertight compartments, your own “day-tight” ones are a way to limit your attention to the present day.

    The rule is simple: whatever happened in the past or might happen in the future must not intrude upon today. Everything else has to wait its turn for tomorrow’s box or stay stuck in the past.

    3. Embrace the Worst-Case Scenario and Strategize to Offset It

    If you’re worried about something, ask yourself: “What’s the worst thing that could happen?” Could you lose your job? Be jailed? Get killed?

    Whatever the “worst” might be, it’s probably not so world-ending. You could probably even bounce back from it!

    If, for example, you lose your job, you could always find another. Once you accept the worst-case scenario and get thinking about contingency plans, you’ll feel calmer.

    4. Put a Lid on Your Worrying

    Sometimes we stress endlessly about negative experiences when just walking away from them would serve us far better.

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    To make squashing that worry easier, try this strategy, straight from stock traders: it’s called the “stop-loss” order, where shares are bought at a certain price, and then their price development is observed. If things go badly and the share price hits a certain point, they are sold off immediately. This stops the loss from increasing further.

    In the same manner, you can put a stop-loss order on things that cause you stress and grief.

    5. Fake It ‘Til You Make It – Happiness, That Is

    We can’t directly influence how we feel, but we can nudge ourselves to change through how we think and act.

    If you’re feeling sad or low, slap a big grin on your face and whistle a chipper tune. You’ll find it impossible to be blue when acting cheerful. But you don’t necessarily need to act outwardly happy; you can simply think happier thoughts instead.

    Marcus Aurelius summed it up aptly:

    “Our life is what our thoughts make it.”

    6. Give for the Joy of Giving

    When we perform acts of kindness, we often do so with the expectation of gratitude. But harboring such expectations will probably leave you disappointed.

    One person well aware of this fact was the lawyer Samuel Leibowitz. Over the course of his career, Leibowitz saved 78 people from going to the electric chair. Guess how many thanked him? None.

    So stop expecting gratitude when you’re kind to someone. Instead, take joy from the act yourself.

    7. Dump Envy – Enjoy Being Uniquely You

    Your genes are completely unique. Even if someone had the same parents as you, the likelihood of someone identical to you being born is just one in 300,000 billion.

    Despite this amazing fact, many of us long to be someone else, thinking the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. But living your life this way is pointless. Embrace your uniqueness and get comfortable with who you really are: How to Be True to Yourself and Live the Life You Want

    8. Haters Will Hate — It Just Means You’re Doing It Right

    When you’re criticized, it often means you’re accomplishing something noteworthy. In fact, let’s take it a step further and consider this: the more you’re criticized, the more influential and important a person you likely are.

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    So the next time somebody talks you down, don’t let it get to you. Take it as a compliment!

    9. Chill Out! Learn to Rest Before You Get Tired

    Scientists agree that emotions are the most common cause of fatigue. And it works the other way around, too: fatigue produces more worries and negative emotions.

    It should be clear, therefore, that you’ve got to relax regularly before you feel tired. Otherwise, worries and fatigue will accumulate on top of each other.

    It’s impossible to worry when you are relaxed, and regular rest helps you maintain your ability to work effectively.

    10. Get Organized and Enjoy Your Work

    There are few greater sources of misery in life than having to work, day in, day out, in a job you despise. It would make sense then that you shouldn’t pick a job you hate, or even just dislike doing.

    But say you already have a job. How can you make it more enjoyable and worry-free? One way is to stay organized: a desk full of unanswered mails and memos is sure to breed worries.

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    Better yet, rethink about the job you’re doing: What to Do When You Hate Your Job but Want a Successful Career

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    Featured photo credit: Tyler Nix via unsplash.com

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