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Do You Make These Parenting Mistakes?

Do You Make These Parenting Mistakes?
  • Honesty is the best policy
  • Where there is a will there is a way
  • Speak truthfully
  • A friend in need is a friend indeed
  • Love thy neighbour
  • Listed above are few of the many values that a child learns both at school and at home. Values define the character of a person, and a child must ideally implement these learning to sustain the force of this competitive world. These values are taught in order to help kids become better individuals overall, but often we find ourselves in a dilemma when we see that the values that we taught our children aren’t reflect in their character. Somehow, they forget these values in the course of their physical, social, and mental development, so we end up believing that something is incorrect in our teaching.

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    parenting mistakes

      Let’s have a look at where we are going wrong, and why our children may not able to stick to the values that we have taught them.

      Children learn from their parents

      Today, if we find a child misbehaving or not sticking to the basic childhood values, it’s possible that the reason behind such behaviour is their parents’ character and behaviour. I’m not saying that parents do not take care of their children—parents must be putting forth their best efforts to raise their child—but they forget that children learn from observing their parents. Parents’ behaviour and interaction with other family members teach a child a lot about this world. An immature child is unable to decide whether parents are right or not and will follow their examples, so our own behaviour needs to be worked upon before addressing the child’s issues.

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      The difference between doing, and saying

      Parents do try to teach their children the best of the values that can help them in building up their life, but they themselves fail to implement them in their own character. They say “Honesty is the Best Policy” and the very next moment, they themselves break this golden rule. When they themselves say one thing and do something else, how can they expect their children to learn what they teach?

      Everything learned needs revision and illustrations

      Imagine you have taught a value to your child and left it there itself: that gentle little child is not self-sufficient enough to grasp your teachings in a single go. Even a teenager who is going to take his exams needs to revise and recite his answers beforehand. So it is with a child: unless you keep reminding him of those values from time to time with the use of real-world happenings and scenarios, those values will easily evaporate. Constant reminders and illustrations are necessary to help the child stick to and implement these teachings in his own life. Somewhere, we fail to understand this fact and thus find our child in a difficult predicament.

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      Give examples instead of just lecturing

      Unless you explain the reasons behind teaching an attribute to your child, it will be difficult for him to grasp it completely. How can we convince him to follow something without putting ahead the reasons for which he should follow them? When we explain something to him, we often fail to explain to him the pros and cons of not following those values—the ifs and buts, the harm in not following something, and other such points must be kept transparent in front of the child. This may seem like common sense, but most people fail to realize its importance.

      We fail to devote time to our children

      Too often, we take more of a teaching than a parenting role with our children, and we fail to give them quality time. When was the last time when we spoke to our children about what’s going on with their school and friends? How many times a day do we show them our affection? We fail to give them our time, and thus they fail to stick to the values and principles taught by us. Our love and affection are vital in motivating them to follow what we say for their own good.

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      All parents need to think about these small—but very crucial—points in which we miss out on during the process of teaching our children. Once these points are taken care of, things will start changing in the right direction.

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    Last Updated on March 13, 2019

    How to Get out of a Rut: 12 Useful Ways to Get Unstuck

    How to Get out of a Rut: 12 Useful Ways to Get Unstuck

    Have you gotten into a rut before? Or are you in a rut right now?

    You know you’re in a rut when you run out of ideas and inspiration. I personally see a rut as a productivity vacuum. It might very well be a reason why you aren’t getting results. Even as you spend more time on your work, you can’t seem to get anything constructive done. While I’m normally productive, I get into occasional ruts (especially when I’ve been working back-to-back without rest). During those times, I can spend an entire day in front of the computer and get nothing done. It can be quite frustrating.

    Over time, I have tried and found several methods that are helpful to pull me out of a rut. If you experience ruts too, whether as a working professional, a writer, a blogger, a student or other work, you will find these useful. Here are 12 of my personal tips to get out of ruts:

    1. Work on the small tasks.

    When you are in a rut, tackle it by starting small. Clear away your smaller tasks which have been piling up. Reply to your emails, organize your documents, declutter your work space, and reply to private messages.

    Whenever I finish doing that, I generate a positive momentum which I bring forward to my work.

    2. Take a break from your work desk.

    Get yourself away from your desk and go take a walk. Go to the washroom, walk around the office, go out and get a snack.

    Your mind is too bogged down and needs some airing. Sometimes I get new ideas right after I walk away from my computer.

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    3. Upgrade yourself

    Take the down time to upgrade yourself. Go to a seminar. Read up on new materials (#7). Pick up a new language. Or any of the 42 ways here to improve yourself.

    The modern computer uses different typefaces because Steve Jobs dropped in on a calligraphy class back in college. How’s that for inspiration?

    4. Talk to a friend.

    Talk to someone and get your mind off work for a while.

    Talk about anything, from casual chatting to a deep conversation about something you really care about. You will be surprised at how the short encounter can be rejuvenating in its own way.

    5. Forget about trying to be perfect.

    If you are in a rut, the last thing you want to do is step on your own toes with perfectionist tendencies.

    Just start small. Do what you can, at your own pace. Let yourself make mistakes.

    Soon, a little trickle of inspiration will come. And then it’ll build up with more trickles. Before you know it, you have a whole stream of ideas.

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    6. Paint a vision to work towards.

    If you are continuously getting in a rut with your work, maybe there’s no vision inspiring you to move forward.

    Think about why you are doing this, and what you are doing it for. What is the end vision in mind?

    Make it as vivid as possible. Make sure it’s a vision that inspires you and use that to trigger you to action.

    7. Read a book (or blog).

    The things we read are like food to our brain. If you are out of ideas, it’s time to feed your brain with great materials.

    Here’s a list of 40 books you can start off with. Stock your browser with only the feeds of high quality blogs, such as Lifehack.org, DumbLittleMan, Seth Godin’s Blog, Tim Ferris’ Blog, Zen Habits or The Personal Excellence Blog.

    Check out the best selling books; those are generally packed with great wisdom.

    8. Have a quick nap.

    If you are at home, take a quick nap for about 20-30 minutes. This clears up your mind and gives you a quick boost. Nothing quite like starting off on a fresh start after catching up on sleep.

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    9. Remember why you are doing this.

    Sometimes we lose sight of why we do what we do, and after a while we become jaded. A quick refresher on why you even started on this project will help.

    What were you thinking when you thought of doing this? Retrace your thoughts back to that moment. Recall why you are doing this. Then reconnect with your muse.

    10. Find some competition.

    Nothing quite like healthy competition to spur us forward. If you are out of ideas, then check up on what people are doing in your space.

    Colleagues at work, competitors in the industry, competitors’ products and websites, networking conventions.. you get the drill.

    11. Go exercise.

    Since you are not making headway at work, might as well spend the time shaping yourself up.

    Sometimes we work so much that we neglect our health and fitness. Go jog, swim, cycle, whichever exercise you prefer.

    As you improve your physical health, your mental health will improve, too. The different facets of ourselves are all interlinked.

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    Here’re 15 Tips to Restart the Exercise Habit (and How to Keep It).

    12. Take a good break.

    Ruts are usually signs that you have been working too long and too hard. It’s time to get a break.

    Beyond the quick tips above, arrange for a 1-day or 2-days of break from your work. Don’t check your (work) emails or do anything work-related. Relax and do your favorite activities. You will return to your work recharged and ready to start.

    Contrary to popular belief, the world will not end from taking a break from your work. In fact, you will be much more ready to make an impact after proper rest. My best ideas and inspiration always hit me whenever I’m away from my work.

    Take a look at this to learn the importance of rest: The Importance of Scheduling Downtime

    More Resources About Getting out of a Rut

    Featured photo credit: Joshua Earle via unsplash.com

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