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How to find YOUR Valentine for Next Year!

How to find YOUR Valentine for Next Year!

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    Valentine’s day is here again. And are you still single? Do you want to attract a dream relationship?

    Well, make 2009 the year you do just that! You still have almost 11 months left to make sure that at least you spend next Christmas with THE one.

    If you are single, then you are not the only one as there are estimated to be over 2 million single people in London alone. And that’s a lot of potential dating material.

    Everyone dreams of that ideal relationship – one that is full of love and affection. A relationship with someone that you connect with mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. We all want to meet our “soul mate”.

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    Internet dating, speed dating and dating agencies are all very popular nowadays. But just how does one find that ideal relationship?

    The key is not to become fixated about getting into a relationship. Focus instead on getting the life you love and living it. The kind of life that excites you so much that you jump out of bed every morning. Once you are in such a clearing, your dream partner can simply walk in and join you.

    Remember that a dream relationship should be the icing on the cake that is your life, and not the end all and be all of your life.

    To create your ideal life, ask your self what it is going to be about. What do you want to do for a living and what do you want to contribute to the world? Where do you want to live and how much money do you want to make? The key is to make your self truly happy right now and also to remain happy regardless of whether you are in a relationship or not.

    This is not to say that you do not go in for things like speed dating or networking events. Just treat these as fun and social events. The trick with making the most of these events is to focus on your best points and be proud of that. For example, you may have a great smile and so show it off.

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    To make an impact with your speed dating partner, ask unusual or even outrageous questions such as – what turns you on the most about a person of the opposite sex? This is sure to make an impression rather than the usual questions such as what do you do, and where do you come from. Also, listen to the other person – we have two ears and one mouth – so listen at least twice as much as you talk.

    Finally it is okay to be rejected when asking someone out on a date. It is only their opinion and their choice. And with all dating related events, have no attachment to the outcome and have fun. Otherwise why would you even do it?

    As for creating a clearing in your life for that dream person to walk in, here are some tips:

    1. Be complete with past relationships. Drop the baggage from the past. Let go of hurts and resentments towards anyone from your past. Forgive and reconcile with that ex-partner who was so mean to you. The true test is to meet such a person from your past and to not feel any negative thoughts.

    2. Take stock of how you have behaved in previous relationships. Since you are single, by definition your past relationships have not worked out for whatever reason. And like it or not, that makes you at least 50% responsible for them not working out.

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    Get clarity on what you contributed to those relationships not working out. Be kind to yourself as you do this. Do not make it an excuse to beat your self up all over again.

    3. Review your beliefs about relationships. What do you think should happen at different stages – from courtship to living together? What are your entrenched beliefs about the opposite sex? For example, from your cultural heritage, what are the expected roles and duties of a partner?

    4. Get clear about what you want in a relationship. Make the fulfilment of your short term and long term needs the criteria for choosing a partner.

    5. Define and get clear about what you want in your ideal relationship and partner. Be realistic, and ask what your needs are rather than your wants. What must your relationship have? What are the absolute essentials for you to thrive?

    6. Socialise and have fun so as to create a varied, rich life and to be part of a healthy supportive community, and to enhance your life. You will therefore focus not so much on meeting your partner and more on creating a rich vibrant life, one which will be so attractive to a potentially dream catch.

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    Most people usually socialise in various ways in order to meet their dream partner, but simply by having fun and enjoying your life you become so much more attractive.

    Make your life work and create room in your life for your ideal partner. Once you have your life working for you, and you are happy, you will indeed attract the right partner.

    Remember, you deserve the best. And that includes a dream relationship and the ideal partner. Don’t accept second best.

    Get clear about what you want in your life partner and why – and you can have it all.

    Get the life you love and live it.

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    Last Updated on September 18, 2020

    7 Simple Rules to Live by to Get in Shape in Two Weeks

    7 Simple Rules to Live by to Get in Shape in Two Weeks

    Learning how to get in shape and set goals is important if you’re looking to live a healthier lifestyle and get closer to your goal weight. While this does require changes to your daily routine, you’ll find that you are able to look and feel better in only two weeks.

    Over the years, I’ve learned a lot about what it takes to get in shape. Although anyone can cover the basics (eat right and exercise), there are some things that I could only learn through trial and error. Let’s cover some of the most important points for how to get in shape in two weeks.

    1. Exercise Daily

    It is far easier to make exercise a habit if it is a daily one. If you aren’t exercising at all, I recommend starting by exercising a half hour every day. When you only exercise a couple times per week, it is much easier to turn one day off into three days off, a week off, or a month off.

    If you are already used to exercising, switching to three or four times a week to fit your schedule may be preferable, but it is a lot harder to maintain a workout program you don’t do every day.

    Be careful to not repeat the same exercise routine each day. If you do an intense ab workout one day, try switching it up to general cardio the next. You can also squeeze in a day of light walking to break up the intensity.

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    If you’re a morning person, check out these morning exercises that will start your day off right.

    2. Duration Doesn’t Substitute for Intensity

    Once you get into the habit of regular exercise, where do you go if you still aren’t reaching your goals? Most people will solve the problem by exercising for longer periods of time, turning forty-minute workouts into two hour stretches. Not only does this drain your time, but it doesn’t work particularly well.

    One study shows that “exercising for a whole hour instead of a half does not provide any additional loss in either body weight or fat”[1].

    This is great news for both your schedule and your levels of motivation. You’ll likely find it much easier to exercise for 30 minutes a day instead of an hour. In those 30 minutes, do your best to up the intensity to your appropriate edge to get the most out of the time.

    3. Acknowledge Your Limits

    Many people get frustrated when they plateau in their weight loss or muscle gaining goals as they’re learning how to get in shape. Everyone has an equilibrium and genetic set point where their body wants to remain. This doesn’t mean that you can’t achieve your fitness goals, but don’t be too hard on yourself if you are struggling to lose weight or put on muscle.

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    Acknowledging a set point doesn’t mean giving up, but it does mean realizing the obstacles you face.

    Expect to hit a plateau in your own fitness results[2]. When you expect a plateau, you can manage around it so you can continue your progress at a more realistic rate. When expectations meet reality, you can avoid dietary crashes.

    4. Eat Healthy, Not Just Food That Looks Healthy

    Know what you eat. Don’t fuss over minutia like whether you’re getting enough Omega 3’s or tryptophan, but be aware of the big things. Look at the foods you eat regularly and figure out whether they are healthy or not. Don’t get fooled by the deceptively healthy snacks just pretending to be good for you.

    The basic nutritional advice includes:

    • Eat unprocessed foods
    • Eat more veggies
    • Use meat as a side dish, not a main course
    • Eat whole grains, not refined grains[3]

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    Eat whole grains when you want to learn how to get in shape.

      5. Watch Out for Travel

      Don’t let a four-day holiday interfere with your attempts when you’re learning how to get in shape. I don’t mean that you need to follow your diet and exercise plan without any excursion, but when you are in the first few weeks, still forming habits, be careful that a week long break doesn’t terminate your progress.

      This is also true of schedule changes that leave you suddenly busy or make it difficult to exercise. Have a backup plan so you can be consistent, at least for the first month when you are forming habits.

      If travel is on your schedule and can’t be avoided, make an exercise plan before you go[4], and make sure to pack exercise clothes and an exercise mat as motivation to keep you on track.

      6. Start Slow

      Ever start an exercise plan by running ten miles and then puking your guts out? Maybe you aren’t that extreme, but burnout is common early on when learning how to get in shape. You have a lifetime to be healthy, so don’t try to go from couch potato to athletic superstar in a week.

      If you are starting a running regime, for example, run less than you can to start. Starting strength training? Work with less weight than you could theoretically lift. Increasing intensity and pushing yourself can come later when your body becomes comfortable with regular exercise.

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      7. Be Careful When Choosing a Workout Partner

      Should you have a workout partner? That depends. Workout partners can help you stay motivated and make exercising more fun. But they can also stop you from reaching your goals.

      My suggestion would be to have a workout partner, but when you start to plateau (either in physical ability, weight loss/gain, or overall health) and you haven’t reached your goals, consider mixing things up a bit.

      If you plateau, you may need to make changes to continue improving. In this case it’s important to talk to your workout partner about the changes you want to make, and if they don’t seem motivated to continue, offer a thirty day break where you both try different activities.

      I notice that guys working out together tend to match strength after a brief adjustment phase. Even if both are trying to improve, something seems to stall improvement once they reach a certain point. I found that I was able to lift as much as 30-50% more after taking a short break from my regular workout partner.

      Final Thoughts

      Learning how to get in shape in as little as two weeks sounds daunting, but if you’re motivated and have the time and energy to devote to it, it’s certainly possible.

      Find an exercise routine that works for you, eat healthy, drink lots of water, and watch as the transformation begins.

      More Tips on Getting in Shape

      Featured photo credit: Alexander Redl via unsplash.com

      Reference

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