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Can You Become Too Focused On Something – and Jeopardize Other Areas of Your Life?

Can You Become Too Focused On Something – and Jeopardize Other Areas of Your Life?

Let me introduce Robert. He is passionate about building his online business, because he thinks that’s his ticket out of his day job.

He is putting a lot of hours in on a daily basis and he is making a very nice progress every day.

Good for Robert, right? Or is it really?

You see, he has been focusing too intensively on just one area of his life. Sure, he’s even making some money off his online venture, but at the same time, he feels tired and stressed. It’s not because of his workload – he absolutely loves what he does.

The problem is that his life is out of balance. He has a family, but he’s ignored them lately in his dedication to his online business. In addition, he has some health issues, since he never has time to exercise or fix his diet. He starts to question his success in his business. Is it worth it, since it’s putting the other parts of his life off-balance?

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Things don’t look so good for him and unless he starts making changes soon, he’ll lose the most valuable things in his life: his family and his health. The good news for Robert and anyone else who is struggling with the same issues is he doesn’t have to give up on his business. There are things that he can do to change the situation.

Taking things for granted

It’s actually quite easy to see why Robert’s life is falling apart. He’s focusing too much on one area of his life while ignoring the other parts. No-one’s life should be centered on only one area; it needs to be spread across many. In order to live a healthy, abundant life, you have to get a bird’s eye perspective of things and see your whole life, not just one part of it.

Also, when you are focusing too much on something, you’ll start taking things for granted, like:

  • Yes, my wife/kids/friends will understand why I work so hard
  • Yes, I can fix my health issues later
  • Yes, I’ll rest later, I’m doing just fine

Unfortunately, this is the perfect recipe for disaster, and if you take things for granted for too long, you’ll do a disservice to yourself and those around you.

Do you respect yourself?

It’s fear that is pushing Robert so hard. He’s afraid that he’ll never be able to resign from his day job and start living his online dream. That’s why he works so hard every day. Then there is the slacker issue. If he doesn’t work hard, he labels himself as a procrastinator, who is not committed enough to his business.

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Unfortunately, he is not able to see that the amount of work he does is already outside the healthy boundaries and it’s already turning against him. Further, he fails to see that he is not alone. The reality is that there are many “Roberts” out there who are facing the same situation as he is – building their businesses part-time and looking for a way out their day jobs.

It can be done; they just need to do it smartly…

Getting back in balance

1. Know the signs. Learn to listen carefully what your family or friends have to say about you and your habits. If you are unsure of what is going on, just ask!

You could also have a regular discussion with your spouse or with the whole family about the situation and how things could be improved. The sooner you improve things, the fewer conflicts there are going to be in the future.

2. Understand your goal and the risks. Make sure you understand what is at stake: Are you really willing to risk the well-being of your family or your health for reaching a goal? Once you see the whole picture, you’ll most likely decide to take proactive action and seek for the balance.

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3. Change the perspective. See things from family’s perspective. For instance, do you really know how your spouse feels, when you are working all the time – while she has to take care of your children (especially if they are small)? Instead, switch roles where you take care of the children while your spouse is out of the home or doing his/her thing. When you understand how the other person feels and it’s easier to make decisions to balance your life.

4. Make your schedules public. Make sure that you define your schedules (working, hobbies …) and then share this information with your family. This could be done for example by using a family calendar and putting it on the fridge door. This way everyone is on the same page about when you are available to them.

5. Allocate time for other stuff too. Our lives shouldn’t be just work – it should contain other things as well. Make sure you dedicate time for yourself, your family, and your friends. This way you can create a balanced life and you will feel much better.

6. Join forces. Form a private Facebook group where you can interact with other likeminded people, for e.g. entrepreneurs. You can share information, ask tips for better productivity or how others have dealt with off-balance situations in their lives.

In conclusion

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When you focus too much on a single area of your life, the consequences can be disastrous. That’s why it’s always important to make sure things aren’t out of balance. When your life is balanced, you are happy and more productive.

Have you ever been too focused on something?

Featured photo credit:  Young man looking at a mirror and aiming via Shutterstock

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Timo Kiander

Productivity Author and Founder of Productive Superdad

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Last Updated on June 13, 2019

5 Fixes For Common Sleep Issues All Couples Deal With

5 Fixes For Common Sleep Issues All Couples Deal With

Sleeping next to your partner can be a satisfying experience and is typically seen as the mark of a stable, healthy home life. However, many more people struggle to share a bed with their partner than typically let on. Sleeping beside someone can decrease your sleep quality which negatively affects your life. Maybe you are light sleepers and you wake each other up throughout the night. Maybe one has a loud snoring habit that’s keeping the other awake. Maybe one is always crawling into bed in the early hours of the morning while the other likes to go to bed at 10 p.m.

You don’t have to feel ashamed of finding it difficult to sleep with your partner and you also don’t have to give up entirely on it. Common problems can be addressed with simple solutions such as an additional pillow. Here are five fixes for common sleep issues that couples deal with.

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1. Use a bigger mattress to sleep through movement

It can be difficult to sleep through your partner’s tossing and turning all night, particularly if they have to get in and out of bed. Waking up multiple times in one night can leave you frustrated and exhausted. The solution may be a switch to a bigger mattress or a mattress that minimizes movement.

Look for a mattress that allows enough space so that your partner can move around without impacting you or consider a mattress made for two sleepers like the Sleep Number bed.[1] This bed allows each person to choose their own firmness level. It also minimizes any disturbances their partner might feel. A foam mattress like the kind featured in advertisements where someone jumps on a bed with an unspilled glass of wine will help minimize the impact of your partner’s movements.[2]

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2. Communicate about scheduling conflicts

If one of you is a night owl and the other an early riser, bedtime can become a source of conflict. It’s hard for a light sleeper to be jostled by their partner coming to bed four hours after them. Talk to your partner about negotiating some compromises. If you’re finding it difficult to agree on a bedtime, negotiate with your partner. Don’t come to bed before or after a certain time, giving the early bird a chance to fully fall asleep before the other comes in. Consider giving the night owl an eye mask to allow them to stay in bed while their partner gets up to start the day.

3. Don’t bring your technology to bed

If one partner likes bringing devices to bed and the other partner doesn’t, there’s very little compromise to be found. Science is pretty unanimous on the fact that screens can cause harm to a healthy sleeper. Both partners should agree on a time to keep technology out of the bedroom or turn screens off. This will prevent both partners from having their sleep interrupted and can help you power down after a long day.

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4. White noise and changing positions can silence snoring

A snoring partner can be one of the most difficult things to sleep through. Snoring tends to be position-specific so many doctors recommend switching positions to stop the snoring. Rather than sleeping on your back doctors recommend turning onto your side. Changing positions can cut down on noise and breathing difficulties for any snorer. Using a white noise fan, or sound machine can also help soften the impact of loud snoring and keep both partners undisturbed.

5. Use two blankets if one’s a blanket hog

If you’ve got a blanket hog in your bed don’t fight it, get another blanket. This solution fixes any issues between two partners and their comforter. There’s no rule that you have to sleep under the same blanket. Separate covers can also cut down on tossing and turning making it a multi-useful adaptation.

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Rather than giving up entirely on sharing a bed with your partner, try one of these techniques to improve your sleeping habits. Sleeping in separate beds can be a normal part of a healthy home life, but compromise can go a long way toward creating harmony in a shared bed.

Featured photo credit: Becca Tapert via unsplash.com

Reference

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