Advertising
Advertising

6 Surprising Reasons You Need to Be Touched: Hug Somebody Today!

6 Surprising Reasons You Need to Be Touched: Hug Somebody Today!

Confession: I have been accused of being needy and clingy by past girlfriends because my needs for physical contact are higher than those of the average male. Nothing makes me happier than having a person I love hold my hand, play with my hair, or lay a head on my shoulder. I require a lot of personal touch to function happily in a relationship, and I’m okay with admitting that. The health benefits of touching are far and wide, so I’d like to convince you to increase the cuddle time with the loved ones in your life. I invite you to consider the top six reasons you need to be touched.

Happier, more fulfilling relationships

Oxycontin is a feel-good hormone that increases your overall happiness. Your body releases oxytocin when you cuddle with a close one, hold your partner tight, or get frisky in bed. Cuddling also releases endorphins, neurotransmitters that fire in your brain and make you feel terrific. If you’ve ever done a challenging workout that made you feel like energetic and accomplished, or ate a piece of dark chocolate that gave you a feeling of bliss, you should be familiar with the happy feeling endorphins produce in your body.

Advertising

Feel sexy and improve intimacy

Have you ever noticed that a little bit of cuddling with your partner sometimes leads to some more risque activities that are a whole lot of fun? Believe it or not, there is a scientific reason cuddling leads to better intimacy between loved ones! Physical contact with a person you love causes your body to release dopamine, a hormone that increases your sexual desire.

Strengthen your bond with the people you love

When your body’s needs for touch aren’t fulfilled, the bond you feel with your loved ones could suffer. Remember the hormone oxytocin that I mentioned above? This hormone plays a significant role in developing a bond between a mother and her children. Make sure you hug your children, kiss your partner, and give your pets a belly-rub to strengthen the bond with the important people in your life.

Advertising

Boost your health and immunity from sickness

According to a 2004 study from the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, physical contact with partners can lead to reduced heart rates. Increase your hug ratio and you can also look forward to reduced blood pressure, decreased cortisol (a stress hormone tied to weight gain), improved healing, reduced cravings, and boosted immunity.

Relieve stress and anxiety

Research shows that couples who only kiss during sex are a staggering eight times more likely to experience stress and depression than those who pucker-up on a regular basis. Kissing releases your body’s feel-good endorphins just like cuddling, so make sure you give your love a kiss before you run out the door to work: it just might make their day!

Advertising

Your body craves touch like it craves water

Touch was the first of your body’s five senses to develop. This sense has been a part of you since 6-9 weeks after conception, and was the most developed sense you had as a newborn baby. Research suggests that human beings are born with a need for physical contact, so to deny yourself touch is to deny yourself of a necessity for your emotional development and well-being. This isn’t to say you have to skip out of work so you can snuggle up in bed (although I’m not going to lie, I believe this sounds wonderful!), but twenty seconds of physical contact could elevate your mood for up to 24 hours. Who can argue with that?

Convinced yet?

I hope so! If these six reasons you need to be touched didn’t convince you, I don’t know what will. A little physical contact will go a long way to making you healthier, happier, less stress, and more fulfilled. Simply hugging your loved ones every day can increase your bond on a staggering level. Are you going to hug somebody today?

Advertising

More by this author

Daniel Wallen

Daniel is a writer who focuses on blogging about happiness and motivation at Lifehack.

Less Thinking, More Doing: Develop the Action Habit Today Why Instant Gratification is the Villain of Success How To Be Happy Alone and Enjoy Life Why You Procrastinate: 7 Possible Reasons You Can’t Get Anything Done 9 Things to Remember When You’re Having a Bad Day

Trending in Health

1 9 Best Blood Pressure Monitors You Can Use at Home 2 How to Control Your Thoughts and Be the Master of Your Mind 3 Simple Hacks on How to Relieve Neck Pain Fast (and Naturally) 4 10 Best Therapy Apps to Better Your Mental Health Anywhere 5 7 Morning Rituals to Empower Your Day And Change Your Life

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

We all have them—those hurtful, frustrating, offensive, manipulative people in our lives. No matter how hard we try to surround ourselves with positive and kind people, there will always be those who will disrespect, insult, berate, and misuse you if we allow them to.

We may, for a variety of reasons, not be able to avoid them, but we can determine how we interact with them and how we allow them to interact with us.

So, how to take control of your life and stop being pushed around?

Learning to set clear firm boundaries with the people in our lives at work and in our personal lives is the best way to protect ourselves from the negative effects of this kind of behavior.

What Boundaries Are (And What They’re Not)

Boundaries are limits

—they are not threats or ultimatums. Boundaries inform or teach. They are not a form of punishment.

Boundaries are firm lines—determined by you—which cannot be crossed by those around you. They are guidelines for how you will allow others to treat you and what kind of behaviors you will expect.

Advertising

Healthy personal boundaries help protect you from physical or emotional pain. You may also need to set firm boundaries at work to ensure you and your time are not disrespected. Don’t allow others to take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

Clear boundaries communicate to others that you demand respect and consideration—that you are willing to stand up for yourself and that you will not be a doormat for anyone. They are a “no trespassing” sign that makes it very clear when a line has been crossed and that there will be consequences for doing so.

Boundaries are not set with the intention of changing other people. They may change how people interact with you, but they are more about enforcing your needs than attempting to change the general behavior and attitude of others.

How to Establish Boundaries and Take Control of Your Life

Here are some ways that you can establish boundaries and take control of your life.

1. Self-Awareness Comes First

Before you can establish boundaries with others, you first need to understand what your needs are.

You are entitled to respect. You have the right to protect yourself from inappropriate or offensive behavior. Setting boundaries is a way of honoring your needs.

To set appropriate boundaries, you need to be clear about what healthy behaviors look like—what healthy relationships look like.

Advertising

You first have to become more aware of your feelings and honest with yourself about your expectations and what you feel is appropriate behavior:

  • Where do you need to establish better boundaries?
  • When do you feel disrespected?
  • When do you feel violated, frustrated, or angered by the behavior of others?
  • In what situations do you feel you are being mistreated or taken advantage of?
  • When do you want to be alone?
  • How much space do you need?

You need to honor your own needs and boundaries before you can expect others to honor them. This allows you to take control of your life.

2. Clear Communication Is Essential

Inform others clearly and directly what your expectations are. It is essential to have clear communication if you want others to respect your boundaries. Explain in an honest and respectful tone what you find offensive or unacceptable.

Many people simply aren’t aware that they are behaving inappropriately. They may never have been taught proper manners or consideration for others.

3. Be Specific but Don’t Blame

Taking a blaming or punishing attitude automatically puts people on the defensive. People will not listen when they feel attacked. It’s part of human nature.

That said, you do not need to overexplain or defend yourself. Boundaries are not open to compromise.

Sample language:

Advertising

  • “You may not…yell or raise your voice to me…”
  • “I need…to be treated with respect…”
  • “It’s not okay when…you take things from my desk without asking…”
  • “I won’t…do your work…cover for you anymore…”
  • “It’s not acceptable when…you ridicule or insult me…”
  • “I am uncomfortable when…you use offensive language”
  • “I will no longer be able to…lend you money…”

Being able to communicate these without sounding accusatory is essential if you want others to respect your boundaries so you can take control of your life.

4. Consequences Are Often Necessary

Determine what the appropriate consequences will be when boundaries are crossed. If it’s appropriate, be clear about those consequences upfront when communicating those boundaries to others.

Follow through. People won’t respect your boundaries if you don’t enforce them.

Standing our ground and forcing consequences doesn’t come easily to us. We want to be nice. We want people to like us, but we shouldn’t have to trade our self-respect to gain friends or to achieve success.

We may be tempted to let minor disrespect slide to avoid conflict, but as the familiar saying goes, “if you give people an inch, they’ll take a mile.”

It’s much easier to address offensive or inappropriate behavior now than to wait until that behavior has gotten completely out of hand.

It’s also important to remember that positive reinforcement is even more powerful than negative consequences. When people do alter the way they treat you, acknowledge it. Let people know that you notice and appreciate their efforts.

Advertising

Final Thoughts

Respect is always a valid reason for setting a boundary. Don’t defend yourself or your needs. Boundaries are often necessary to protect your time, your space, and your feelings. And these are essential if you want to take control of your life.

Start with the easiest boundaries first. Setting boundaries is a skill that needs to be practiced. Enlist support from others if necessary. Inform people immediately when they have crossed the line.

Don’t wait. Communicate politely and directly. Be clear about the consequences and follow them through.

The better you become at setting your own boundaries, the better you become at recognizing and respecting the boundaries of others.

Remember that establishing boundaries is your right. You are entitled to respect. You can’t control how other people behave, but you do have control over the way you allow people to treat you.

Learning to set boundaries is not always easy, but with time, it will become more comfortable. You may eventually find that boundaries become automatic and you no longer need to consciously set them.

They will simply become a natural extension of your self-respect.

Featured photo credit: Thomas Kelley via unsplash.com

Read Next