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2 Different Kinds of Stress Which Make-or-Break a Person

2 Different Kinds of Stress Which Make-or-Break a Person
    Photo credit: itsaboyd (CC BY-NC 2.0)

    When we speak of stress, oftentimes, we only think of all negative implications it brings us. However, stress is not all bad.  In fact, stress can also be good. We just have to be mindful of what kind and level of stress we are in.

    By definition from Merriam-Webster dictionary:

    Stress is a force exerted when one body or body part presses on, pulls on, pushes, or tends to compress or twist another body or body part.  It’s a constraining force or influence.

    In simple terms, stress is a kind of pressure, force or influence that moves us to action, either physically, emotionally or mentally.

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    Stress is important because it brings meaning to our life. Life without any kind of stress will be lifeless and boring.  Stress can  make life worthwhile.

    One of the major causes of stress is work.  Imagine if we lived without working, with no challenge and pressure to attend to, or no project to accomplish. At first, we will like and enjoy it, but as days go by that we don’t do anything, eventually, we will feel like our life has no meaning and purpose.

    Our mind, body and life in general are designed to do some level of work or activity to give it meaning and purpose.

    The Two Different Kinds of Stress

    Generally, there are two kinds of stress:

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    1. Positive Stress
    2. Negative Stress

    Positive Stress

    Positive Stress, also referred to as Eustress, is often felt when we are confronted with demanding and challenging situation which we are capable of handling. Challenges and responsibility gives us a sense of thrill and excitement.

    An example of eustress is when we are working on new projects (like a promotion or business venture) or when we are entering a competition (like a sports tournament). It brings us a feeling of enthusiasm to win and succeed in the new challenge.

    Eustress is a healthy kind of stress because it motivates and inspires us in our daily life activity and work. As a result, it gives us positive feelings of fulfillment and enthusiasm.

    People who are experiencing positive stress contribute outstanding performance and output. They are the ones who enjoy what they do and they become successful in their endeavors.

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    Positive stress is a kind of stress that is essential in winning and succeeding in life. It’s a kind of stress that can make a person live a fulfilled and successful life.

    Negative Stress

    Negative stress is the “most popular” kind of stress. It’s a stress that causes negative implication such as anxiety, fatigue, depression, unhappiness and other illnesses.

    An example of physical negative stress is when we are working on many projects and responsibility beyond what we can do, or when we no longer have time to relax and even get enough sleep. On the other hand, a source of negative emotional stress is when we don’t have good relationships with the people around us.

    When we are met with negative stress, it often blocks our happiness and success and if it is prolonged, we can become emotionally, mentally and physically sick.

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    People who are experiencing negative stress are the one who always complain and feel miserable about life. They tend to become a victim instead of a victor. They have low self-esteem, are hard to relate and deal with, and have less accomplishments.  As such, they are often unfulfilled and unsuccessful.

    Negative stress is a kind of stress that can break a person’s potential success and fulfillment in life. It is one of the main killers of winning and success.

    Now that we know the two different kinds of stress, our responsibility is to be aware of the signs that shows which kind of stress dominates us and do something constructive to solve it.

    Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative stress into a positive one. ~ Hans Selye

    Remember to use positive stress as motivation to keep you moving and performing excellent work. At the same time, be mindful of the negative stress that may paralyze you. Know how to maintain an appropriate balance between the two.

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    Last Updated on February 15, 2019

    Why Is Goal Setting Important to a Truly Fulfilling Life?

    Why Is Goal Setting Important to a Truly Fulfilling Life?

    In Personal Development-speak, we are always talking about goals, outcomes, success, desires and dreams. In other words, all the stuff we want to do, achieve and create in our world.

    And while it’s important for us to know what we want to achieve (our goal), it’s also important for us to understand why we want to achieve it; the reason behind the goal or some would say, our real goal.

    Why is goal setting important?

    1. Your needs and desire will be fulfilled.

    Sometimes when we explore our “why”, (why we want to achieve a certain thing) we realize that our “what” (our goal) might not actually deliver us the thing (feeling, emotion, internal state) we’re really seeking.

    For example, the person who has a goal to lose weight in the belief that weight loss will bring them happiness, security, fulfillment, attention, popularity and the partner of their dreams. In this instance, their “what” is weight-loss and their “why” is happiness (etc.) and a partner.

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    Six months later, they have lost the weight (achieved their goal) but as is often the case, they’re not happier, not more secure, not more confident, not more fulfilled and in keeping with their miserable state, they have failed to attract their dream partner.

    After all, who wants to be with someone who’s miserable? They achieved their practical goal but still failed to have their needs met.

    So they set a goal to lose another ten pounds. And then another. And maybe just ten more. With the destructive and erroneous belief that if they can get thin enough, they’ll find their own personal nirvana. And we all know how that story ends.

    2. You’ll find out what truly motivates you

    The important thing in the process of constructing our best life is not necessarily what goals we set (what we think we want) but what motivates us towards those goals (what we really want).

    The sooner we begin to explore, identify and understand what motivates us towards certain achievements, acquisitions or outcomes (that is, we begin moving towards greater consciousness and self awareness), the sooner we will make better decisions for our life, set more intelligent (and dare I say, enlightened) goals and experience more fulfilment and less frustration.

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    We all know people who have achieved what they set out to, only to end up in the same place or worse (emotionally, psychologically, sociologically) because what they were chasing wasn’t really what they were needing.

    What we think we want will rarely provide us with what we actually need.

    3. Your state of mind will be a lot healthier

    We all set specific goals to achieve/acquire certain things (a job, a car, a partner, a better body, a bank balance, a title, a victory) because at some level, most of us believe (consciously or not) that the achievement of those goals will bring us what we really seek; joy, fulfilment, happiness, safety, peace, recognition, love, acceptance, respect, connection.

    Of course, setting practical, material and financial goals is an intelligent thing to do considering the world we live in and how that world works.

    But setting goals with an expectation that the achievement of certain things in our external, physical world will automatically create an internal state of peace, contentment, joy and total happiness is an unhealthy and unrealistic mindset to inhabit.

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    What you truly want and need

    Sometimes we need to look beyond the obvious (superficial) goals to discover and secure what we really want.

    Sadly, we live in a collective mindset which teaches that the prettiest and the wealthiest are the most successful.

    Some self-help frauds even teach this message. If you’re rich or pretty, you’re happy. If you’re both, you’re very happy. Pretty isn’t what we really want; it’s what we believe pretty will bring us. Same goes with money.

    When we cut through the hype, the jargon and the self-help mumbo jumbo, we all have the same basic goals, desires and needs:

    Joy, fulfilment, happiness, safety, peace, recognition, love, acceptance, respect, connection.

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    Nobody needs a mansion or a sport’s car but we all need love.

    Nobody needs massive pecs, six percent body-fat, a face lift or bigger breasts but we all need connection, acceptance and understanding.

    Nobody needs to be famous but we all need peace, calm, balance and happiness.

    The problem is, we live in a culture which teaches that one equals the other. If only we lived in a culture which taught that real success is far more about what’s happening in our internal environment, than our external one.

    It’s a commonly-held belief that we’re all very different and we all have different goals — whether short term or long term goals. But in many ways we’re not, and we don’t; we all want essentially the same things.

    Now all you have to do is see past the fraud and deception and find the right path.

    Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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