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12 Personality Types to Avoid to Make 2009 Your Best Year

12 Personality Types to Avoid to Make 2009 Your Best Year

Masks

    Forever Results

    When it comes to creating life-long positive change in our world (that is, “forever results”), most people won’t and don’t – despite their constant attempts to re-invent themselves and ample access to an ever-increasing range of information, inspiration, resources, specialists, and facilities to help them through the change process. That’s not to say that they can’t transform themselves or don’t have the potential for greatness and forever results, it just means that typically, they won’t do it. And no, that’s not some negative spin, it’s a realistic snapshot of people’s mindset, behaviours and results over the long term.

    Just take a look around. Most people know what to do, but for a range of reasons, don’t do what they know. Not consistently anyway. Great at starting, crap at getting the job done. Most people who get motivated, lose focus. Most people who lose weight, regain it. Most people who get fit, get unfit. Most people who make a New Year’s resolution have thrown in the towel by about now and most people who give up that bad habit have done it twenty times before. Which means they’ve never really done it at all; they’ve just taken a temporary break.

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      Friends of Yours?

      Here’s a group of people that will continue to under-achieve and waste their time and talent unless they change their thinking and their behaviour. For good. I’ve worked with all of them at some stage. You might know some of them. You may even be some of them.

      1. The Over-Thinker. We’ve all read about the Over-Thinker here at me-dot-com. She makes a regular appearance. She over-thinks, under-does and typically dies from analysis paralysis. She often has a facial expression which is a mix of constipation, confusion, desperation, exhaustion and fear. She will periodically have smoke coming from her ears and can often be seen talking to herself. Sometimes audibly. She may have a twitch. Her over-thinking will affect her physical health and reduce her lifespan by ten years. Or so.

      2. The Procrastinator. The Procrastinator is always about to start something. If only he would. He is a world champion when it comes to almost doing things. Sadly, he will die waiting for the mythical right time.

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      3. The Rationaliser. The Rationaliser is first cousin of the Excuse Maker. They spend a lot of time together and as a result, look and sound very similar. The Rationaliser has an amazing ability to justify and explain her pathetic behaviour and consistently poor results. She is both delusional and entertaining.

      4. The Reactor. The Reactor does just that; react. And usually badly.

      5. The Defender. The defender will defend his actions, behaviours, results and mistakes, no matter what. He is arrogant, annoyingly self-righteous and a first cousin to the Blamer. He is an expert at responsibility transferal and shifting focus. He has the social appeal of herpes.

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      6. The BSer. Never one to let the facts get in the way of a good story, the BSer can be found in the workplace, the home, the sporting club, the gym and of course, where ever politicians hang out. Every family has at least one BSer and while they can be somewhat amusing, they also prove to be tiresome and annoying; especially when alcohol is thrown into the mix. For some unknown reason, a disproportionate number of fathers over the age of fifty have a PhD. in BS. This phenomenon is still being investigated. In some cultures the BSer is also known as the Wanker.

      7. The Dreamer. It’s great to dream but not when that’s all you do. In order to produce positive and lasting change in our world we need to attach our dream to an action plan, wrap it in some logic and then turn it into a reality with some sweat, discipline, courage and commitment. Most dreamers have at least one tie-dye T-shirt in their wardrobe.

      8. The Reminiscer. Aaaah, those were the days. The Reminiscer is always reminding anyone stupid enough to listen about her historical exploits and achievements. How amazing she once was. And curiously, the older she gets, the better she was. If only the Reminiscer would pull her deluded head out of her (largely fictitious) past and invest some talent and energy into the ‘now’, she might just turn her sad life around. And stop annoying the rest of us.

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      9. The Genius. The Genius is insecure, loves to be heard, and is compelled to demonstrate his intellectual and academic superiority as often as possible. Ironically, he’s usually not that smart. While he may possess a moderate level of academic intelligence, he typically demonstrates zero emotional intelligence, has no social awareness to speak of, and will take every opportunity to re-direct any conversation back to himself.

      10. The Complicator. The Complicator has a gift for making the easy, hard. If there’s a long way around, she’ll find it. With her, the most simple task can become a major drama and a sixty second chat can easily be turned into a sixty minute hair-pulling exercise in frustration and confusion.

      11. The Victim. The Victim is incredibly misunderstood. In his mind anyway. He sees himself as something of a martyr when in reality, he is a self-centred, attention seeking tool who wants sympathy not solutions. He is exhausting to be around and makes the BSer seem almost appealing.

      Yes, I was going to add one more but I thought I might leave number twelve up to you. Feel free to complete my list, share a comment or tell us about an experience.

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      Last Updated on January 17, 2019

      8 Simple Mindfulness Exercises to Bring Peace and Happiness to Your Life

      8 Simple Mindfulness Exercises to Bring Peace and Happiness to Your Life

      In life, we all need to be conscientious of what we are doing. You don’t need to live a life of stress if you don’t want to. You can achieve peace and happiness in life by carefully building mindfulness exercises into your life’s routine.

      Exercising mindfulness isn’t rocket science and as importantly, you can do it. It will, however, take a few tries to get into the groove of things but once you get it, it is like riding a bike, you will never lose it.

      Trust me. It’s in your best interest to learn and put these mindfulness exercises into practice. In this article, I will share with you 8 mindfulness exercises that will help you to boost your energy, vitality and live a more peaceful and happier life.

      Why Is It Hard to Live A Peaceful And Happy Life?

      Our Habitat Has Become Too Technological

      The world has accepted the idea that technology is often the cure for all evil. We have accepted, as a society, that everything technological will make us live a better life without fully investigating the many side effects that modernity brings.

      There are a number of technological side effects that have a tremendous impact on your life that the media rarely tells you about.[1] Some of them include self-harm, economic inequality, having less sex, and even suicide. The global community is becoming less happy because of technology.

      How can anybody live a peaceful and happy life when they are depressed? Technology advancements, ladies and gents, is a major reason for why we are living a poor life because it has infiltrated our lives too much.

      According to my research, Americans spend an average of 8 hours a day looking at the computer screen — The average screen time spent on smartphones alone is about 20 hours per week. That’s a lot! No wonder why living a happy and peaceful life is so difficult these days.

      Too Many People Don’t Want to Unplug

      Americans check their phones an average of 80 times during vacation.[2] Some admit to checking their smartphones 300 times every single day. In countries like Brazil, India and China, the situation is no different.

      The reality is that people are constantly plugged into technological devices and this behavior is literally making people all over the globe fight an inner war with themselves, which consequently makes them very sad. As we know, war is the enemy of peace which won’t make anybody happy.

      Listen carefully:

      We have a global anxiety epidemic because people don’t want to unplug from their smartphones and most people aren’t doing anything to fix it. It is a sad state of affairs but very real. This obsession with technology is turning us into perishable robots who live terrible lives.

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      The era of anxiety is here to stay. There is little doubt about it. We can, however, fight back with the best remedy of all — We call it mindfulness!

      Thank God there is an antidote to this whole technological madness. Without further ado, let’s go straight to the mindful exercises.

      8 Mindfulness Exercises to Start Practicing

      There are tons of mindfulness exercises available for you to engage with out there.[3] In the paragraphs below, I will include the best ones I’ve personally tried or have seen my close friends and family members try.

      Are you ready for it? Let’s go!

      1. Pray Daily

      You should pray on a daily basis. Why is that you may ask — Well, because science has told us to do so.

      When people pray, they feel peaceful, almost eliminating anxiety. Worries become secondary, and often gives people energy and hope to cope with the difficulties of life.

      Prayer can make you more confident and focused. Prayer also helps you with self-control, helps to control pain, and can protect you against illnesses and disorders like cancer and high blood pressure. At least, this is what researchers from Harvard Medical School have said.[4]

      Pray. You won’t regret it.[5]

      2. Pay Attention to Your Inner Thoughts

      A lot of people allow themselves to be influenced by their negative thoughts. Be different and resist believing in them. It is a bad habit that can lead to unhappiness.

      By the way, if you do feel this way, chances are high that somebody other than you put these thoughts into your head.

      Here is my secret to combat this cancer — look at things objectively. I bet that if you look at things as they are, you will realize that most if not all of your negative thoughts are only inside of your head.

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      If you pay close attention, you will quickly realize that these voices aren’t worth your time. Believe me — Ignoring them and looking at things with objectivity is often the best course of action.

      This article can guide you to beat negative thoughts:

      How to Stop Automatic Negative Thoughts When You’re Overwhelmed

      3. Smile Often

      Smiling will slow down your heart. It will also relax your body because when you smile, your body releases endorphins which in itself has a number of positive benefits for you as a person.

      Smile often! You may want to smile early in the morning, during the day, and late in the evening. It is amazing what happens to you when you decide to smile instead of being grumpy.

      Surrender your problems to a nice smile. You will notice two things. First, most people just don’t which makes them live a miserable life. Second, if you decide to smile often, you will eventually smile unconsciously which is the ideal.

      The moment that you smile unconsciously, you then know that you are truly happy.

      4. Organize Your Working Desk

      A messy desk will make you less productive and can agitate and overstimulate you. You don’t want that.

      When you clear your desk, you engage in deep inner-thinking and your systematic decision making ends up becoming therapeutic.

      Most people realize that they are most creative when their creative space is clean and organized. The former often makes people more aware of what they are doing which lends to less stress and more productivity.

      Organizing your desk will also make you more energetic and focused because order often decreases chaos which is a condition that often slows down daily progress.

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      5. Celebrate Your Friend’s Victories

      I love this mindful exercise. One of the best ways to live a happy and peaceful life is to celebrate the victories of others. When you do that, you automatically make your friends in a better mood which makes you in a better mood, as well.

      Happiness is contagious! We might as well celebrate others as much as we can. If you find out that your peer has won an award, celebrate with him! If your friend is the recipient of a local charity award, celebrate with her!

      What is also awesome is that when you celebrate with others, they often celebrate with you in return. This, ladies and gentleman, will make you feel fantastic. You can’t go wrong with this one, period.

      6. Listen to Your Spouse/Partner

      God put someone in your life for a reason. You might as well listen to him or her.

      I listen to my wife everyday. In fact, I often ask the following question to her, “Amanda, what are your thoughts about…” or “What am I missing about…” It is shocking what I hear back from her. Without her having much context and perspective, by the art of observation in my own nonverbal behavior and the behavior of others, she accurately gives me incredible insights which helps me out with living my life to the fullest.

      I’m a firm believer that spouses are supposed to engage in interpersonal communication every day. I most definitely do and will continue doing it. You should do the same.

      7. Give Yourself a Break from Technology

      You can’t be in total equilibrium if your computerized devices control your life. You must get away from technology on a daily basis.[6]

      How do you do that? This is my formula:

      First, take this smartphone control test. It is only ten questions but this test will place you somewhere in the human robot cycle continuum.

      If your score is between 25-30, take a break from the computer (or smartphone, pad, laptop/desktop) every twenty minutes and stop being on a computerized device after 8:00pm.

      If you score between 30-35, still take a break every 20 minutes but stop being on these devices at 5:00pm.

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      If you score more than 35, you need to take action immediately.

      Limit computer use as much as possible throughout the day. Give yourself as many breaks from the computer as possible. Are you ready for the challenge?

      8. Go Exercise

      Go exercise at least three times a week. I don’t care if you need to workout early in the morning, late in the evening, on the weekends or during work days. Working out is absolutely imperative for you to live happy and peaceful life.

      The stresses of the modern world are too much for you to neglect this important mindfulness exercise. When you go to the gym, you burn calories, focus on activities one step at a time, your mind relaxes, anxiety decreases, you sweat and often think about topics unrelated to your work place among many other benefits.

      You must exercise at least three hours each week for optimum results. Why? Just take a look at all the benefits of regular exercising:

      12 Benefits of Regular Exercise You Should Know

      The Bottom Line

      It’s in your best interest to learn and put these mindfulness exercises into practice. Now that our habitat has become too technological and many people just don’t want to unplug, engaging in daily prayer, celebrate your friends’ victories, and listening to your spouse are among the best ways to be mindful about what you are doing and how you are living.

      It is possible to live a happy and peaceful life. It only depends on you.

      Go exercise! Take a break from technology and invest in you! Life is too short for distractions.

      More Resources About Mindfulness

      Featured photo credit: Lesly Juarez via unsplash.com

      Reference

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