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Last Updated on December 4, 2020

10 Things You Need to Learn to Live a Truly Happy Life

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10 Things You Need to Learn to Live a Truly Happy Life

The older we get, the more that we experience life and the more that we learn what truly makes us happy.

“Happiness is a how, not a what. A talent, not an object.” — Herman Hesse

Personally, happiness has always been an intriguing point of interest for me. I have always seen happiness as the epitome of all success that life can bring. If you’re happy, then surely you’ve got everything sorted, right? What more could you want?

Happiness comes in many forms. The good thing is it can be extremely different from person to person. Why is this a good thing? You can tailor everything you do in your life to bring out the happiness in you. You can actually learn to be happy. There are however, a number of key themes that span across all individuals for finding happiness.

To bring out the best in you and help you live a happy life, there are 10 things that you need to learn.

1. Learn to Say I Love You

For some reason, this can be a hard one for many people, particularly with immediate family members. Generally, as you grow older you will come to realize what your family (particularly your parents) have done for you throughout your life and you will learn to become more grateful for what you have. Learning to say “I love you” can make your relationships blossom, and it builds transparency, honesty and trust, ultimately helping you in becoming a happier person.

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2. Learn to Forgive

Have there been times in your life where you have felt betrayed or let down? Have there been times when you have felt that you have let others down? Although sometimes hard, forgiving others and being able to forgive yourself is essential for being able to move forward and regain a positive outlook in life.

Learn in this guide: How to Forgive and Live a Happy Life Again (A Step-By-Step Guide)

3. Learn to Say No

Do you struggle with saying no to people, events or situations? Without saying no, you can become overwhelmed and experience imbalance in your life.

Learning to say no is essential for being able to focus on what you truly believe in, what you value and what is important to you in your life.

Take up The Gentle Art of Saying No.

4. Learn to Live Your Passions Every Day

Do you currently incorporate your passions into your everyday life? Spending even the smallest amount of time living your passion each day can have a huge impact to the way you feel and to what you want to achieve in your life.

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Don’t know where to find your passion? Try this: How to Find Your Passion and Live a Fulfilling Life

5. Learn to Eat Healthy And Exercise Regularly

The old saying goes ‘you are what you eat’ and even in this day and age the saying is truer than ever. The amount of information on health and wellbeing these days is absolutely enormous.

Scientifically proven through the release of endorphins, eating healthy and exercising regularly can help you live a more fulfilled life and help you feel happier on a daily basis.

Take up some of these healthy habits that will drastically improve your life.

6. Learn to Connect Deeply

Are you afraid of connecting deeply with others at the thought that you may be making yourself too vulnerable in doing so?

Making yourself vulnerable and connecting deeply with others is actually not that hard. Connecting deeply with others can help you become more relaxed, open and honest, helping you to be yourself and ultimately help you become a much happier person.

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7. Learn to See Life Differently

What’s unique about you? Are you creating your own life and your own lifestyle? Life is not meant to be taken so seriously. Life is simply about enjoying the time that we have.

We only live once. The older you get the more you will realize how fast time slips by, reminding you to slow down and appreciate the moment.

8. Learn to Set Your Goals

Do you set your own goals and work towards them? Or does the World around you do it for you?

We normally get brought up in a society where parents tell you what grades you should aim for, the media tells you how you should live your life, and your teachers tell you how to go about your schooling.

Setting your own goals, focusing on them and pursuing them will enable you to follow what you truly believe in, live by your values and ultimately help you live a much happier life.

This article can help you to set goals: How to Set Goals and Achieve Them Successfully

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9. Learn to Count Your Blessings

What do you take for granted? As you grow and become more aware of the world around you, you will come to realize that you are extremely blessed. Perhaps you are blessed with good health, a good community or the freedom to live a life that you choose. The fact that you have the ability to connect to the internet right now in your leisure, read and learn is a blessing that many do not have.

What do you have in your life or what experiences have you had that other people may have not? Remind yourself of this every day. Counting your blessings will help you take to the World with a positive outlook and a mindset to make a difference.

If you need some reminders on what to be grateful for, here they are: 60 Things To Be Thankful For In Life

10. Learn to Give

Giving is a fundamental and essential ingredient for happiness. There is no doubt that the more you give the more you get in return.

Giving to others can enhance your relationships, build trust, but most importantly, it can make a difference in the life of someone else, and this is the ultimate in happiness!

Final Thoughts

Have you mastered the 10 key ingredients for happiness? Which ones do you feel would benefit you the most? What can you do today to ensure you go to bed tonight feeling super-happy? Start to take action and live a happier life from now on.

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Featured photo credit: Brooke Cagle via unsplash.com

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Brendan Baker

Brendan helps people who feel stuck doing work they don't like start to make a difference and an income doing what they love.

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Last Updated on November 18, 2021

10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

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10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

We all fall into the trap of judging a person’s character by their appearance. How wrong we are! All too often, the real character of the person only appears when some negative event hits them or you. Then you may see a toxic person emerging from the ruins and it is often a shock.

A truly frightening example is revealed in the book by O’Toole in Bowman called Dangerous Instincts: How Gut Instincts Betray Us. A perfectly respectable, charming, well dressed neighbor was found to have installed a torture chamber in his garage where he was systematically abusing kidnapped women. This is an extreme example, but it does show how we can be totally deceived by a person’s physical appearance, manners and behavior.

So, what can you do? You want to be able to assess personal qualities when you come into contact with colleagues, fresh acquaintances and new friends who might even become lifelong partners. You want to know if they are:

  • honest
  • reliable
  • competent
  • kind and compassionate
  • capable of taking the blame
  • able to persevere
  • modest and humble
  • pacific and can control anger.

The secret is to reserve judgment and take your time. Observe them in certain situations; look at how they react. Listen to them talking, joking, laughing, explaining, complaining, blaming, praising, ranting, and preaching. Only then will you be able to judge their character. This is not foolproof, but if you follow the 10 ways below, you have a pretty good chance of not ending up in an abusive relationship.

1. Is anger a frequent occurrence?

All too often, angry reactions which may seem to be excessive are a sign that there are underlying issues. Do not think that every person who just snaps and throws his/her weight around mentally and physically is just reacting normally. Everyone has an occasional angry outburst when driving or when things go pear-shaped.

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But if this is almost a daily occurrence, then you need to discover why and maybe avoid that person. Too often, anger will escalate to violent and aggressive behavior. You do not want to be near someone who thinks violence can solve personal or global problems.

2. Can you witness acts of kindness?

How often do you see this person being kind and considerate? Do they give money to beggars, donate to charity, do voluntary work or in some simple way show that they are willing to share the planet with about 7 billion other people?

I was shocked when a guest of mine never showed any kindness to the weak and disadvantaged people in our town. She was ostensibly a religious person, but I began to doubt the sincerity of her beliefs.

“The best index to a person’s character is how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and how he treats people who can’t fight back.”

Abigail Van Buren

3. How does this person take the blame?

Maybe you know that s/he is responsible for a screw-up in the office or even in not turning up on time for a date. Look at their reaction. If they start blaming other colleagues or the traffic, well, this is an indication that they are not willing to take responsibility for their mistakes.

4. Don’t use Facebook as an indicator.

You will be relieved to know that graphology (the study of that forgotten skill of handwriting) is no longer considered a reliable test of a person’s character. Neither is Facebook stalking, fortunately. A study showed that Facebook use of foul language, sexual innuendo and gossip were not reliable indicators of a candidate’s character or future performance in the workplace.

5. Read their emails.

Now a much better idea is to read the person’s emails. Studies show that the use of the following can indicate certain personality traits:

  • Too many exclamation points may reveal a sunny disposition
  • Frequent errors may indicate apathy
  • Use of smileys is the only way a person can smile at you
  • Use of the third person may reveal a certain formality
  • Too many question marks can show anger
  • Overuse of capital letters is regarded as shouting. They are a definite no-no in netiquette, yet a surprising number of  people still use them.

6. Watch out for the show offs.

Listen to people as they talk. How often do they mention their achievements, promotions, awards and successes? If this happens a lot, it is a sure indication that this person has an over-inflated view of his/her achievements. They are unlikely to be modest or show humility. What a pity!  Another person to avoid.

7. Look for evidence of perseverance.

A powerful indicator of grit and tenacity is when a person persists and never gives up when they really want to achieve a life goal. Look for evidence of them keeping going in spite of enormous difficulties.

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Great achievements by scientists and inventors all bear the hallmark of perseverance. We only have to think of Einstein, Edison (who failed thousands of times) and Nelson Mandela to get inspiration. The US Department of Education is in no doubt about how grit, tenacity and perseverance will be key success factors for youth in the 21st century.

8. Their empathy score is high.

Listen to how they talk about the less fortunate members of our society such as the poor, immigrants and the disabled. Do you notice that they talk in a compassionate way about these people? The fact that they even mention them is a strong indicator of empathy.

People with zero empathy will never talk about the disadvantaged. They will rarely ask you a question about a difficult time or relationship. They will usually steer the conversation back to themselves. These people have zero empathy and in extreme cases, they are psychopaths who never show any feelings towards their victims.

9. Learn how to be socially interactive.

We are social animals and this is what makes us so uniquely human. If a person is isolated or a loner, this may be a negative indicator of their character. You want to meet a person who knows about trust, honesty and loyalty. The only way to practice these great qualities is to actually interact socially. The great advantage is that you can share problems and celebrate success and joy together.

“One can acquire everything in solitude, except character.”

Stendhal

 10. Avoid toxic people.

These people are trying to control others and often are failing to come to terms with their own failures. Typical behavior and conversations may concern:

  • Envy or jealousy
  • Criticism of partners, colleagues and friends
  • Complaining about their own lack of success
  • Blaming others for their own bad luck or failure
  • Obsession with themselves and their problems

Listen to these people talk and you will quickly discover that you need to avoid them at all costs because their negativity will drag you down. In addition, as much as you would like to help them, you are not qualified to do so.

Now, having looked at some of the best ways to judge a person, what about yourself? How do others see you? Why not take Dr. Phil’s quiz and find out. Can you bear it?

Featured photo credit: Jacek Dylag via unsplash.com

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